5737 (look at it upside-down) by Jet

Jet: Bronze

diordnas — 2015-12-01 22:33:42 UTC

diordnas — 2015-12-01 22:33:26 UTC

Jet: Platinum

diordnas — 2015-12-01 22:33:02 UTC

Jet: Silver

diordnas — 2015-12-01 22:32:29 UTC

Jet: Silver

diordnas — 2015-11-29 23:30:28 UTC

Jet: Silver

diordnas — 2015-11-29 23:30:15 UTC

Jet: Silver

diordnas — 2015-11-29 23:29:59 UTC

Jet: Gold

diordnas — 2015-11-29 23:08:23 UTC

Jet: Silver

diordnas — 2015-11-29 23:07:46 UTC

Jet: Gold

Why did the creeper cross the road? Coz the Ocelot was chasing him, duh!

diordnas — 2015-11-29 23:01:22 UTC

Jet: Gold

How does Steve get exercise? He runs around the block!

diordnas — 2015-11-29 23:00:38 UTC

Jet: Silver

diordnas — 2015-11-29 23:00:15 UTC

Jet: Gold

diordnas — 2015-11-29 22:59:45 UTC

Jet: Silver

diordnas — 2015-11-29 22:59:26 UTC

Jet: Gold

Top seven excuses for not doing homework: 1. I accidentally divided by zero and my paper burst into flames. 2. Isaac Newton's birthday. 3. I could only get arbitrarily close to my textbook. I couldn't actually reach it. 4. I have the proof, but there isn't room to write it in this margin. 5. I have a solar powered calculator and it was cloudy. 6. I locked the paper in a box but a four-dimensional dog got in and ate it. 7. I couldn't figure out whether i am the square of negative one or i is the square root of negative one.

diordnas — 2015-11-21 00:22:50 UTC

Jet: Gold

What's the opposite of Nitrogen? Daytrogen

TheGreenCow — 2015-11-25 22:50:44 UTC

Jet: Silver

A photon checks into a hotel. When asked if he needed help with his luggage, he replied, "Nah, I'm travelling light."

TheGreenCow — 2015-11-25 22:50:04 UTC

Jet: Silver

Don't overuse exclamation marks!!!

diordnas — 2015-11-25 22:40:43 UTC

Jet: Gold

What kind of fish is made from two sodium atoms? Two-Na! (Explanation: Two-Na = Tuna)

diordnas — 2015-11-21 01:08:58 UTC

Jet: Silver

What does a sub-atomic duck say? Quark!

diordnas — 2015-11-21 01:08:04 UTC

Jet: Silver

You made Lithium react with Argon? LiAr!

diordnas — 2015-11-21 01:07:09 UTC

Jet: Silver

There are two types of people in this world: those who can extrapolate from incomplete data.

diordnas — 2015-11-21 01:05:58 UTC

Jet: Gold

No-one really likes this joke. I guess it's because it's boron.

diordnas — 2015-11-21 01:04:38 UTC

Jet: Gold

Radioactive cats have 18 half-lives

diordnas — 2015-11-21 01:04:14 UTC

Jet: Gold

No I'm not trying to poison you. Now eat your Pb and Jelly sandwich. (Explanation: Pb is the chemical symbol for lead, which is highly poisonous)

diordnas — 2015-11-21 01:02:53 UTC

Jet: Pt (look it up suckers)

Tell a potassium joke? k

diordnas — 2015-11-21 01:02:18 UTC

Jet: Silver

I hate telling noble gas jokes - there's never a reaction

diordnas — 2015-11-21 00:59:38 UTC

Jet: Silver

A mathematician, a physicist, and an engineer are all given identical rubber balls and told to find the volume. They are given anything they want to measure it, and have all the time they need. The mathematician pulls out a measuring tape and records the circumference. He then divides by two times pi to get the radius, cubes that, multiplies by pi again, and then multiplies by four-thirds and thereby calculates the volume. The physicist gets a bucket of water, places 1.00000 gallons of water in the bucket, drops in the ball, and measures the displacement to six significant figures. And the engineer? He writes down the serial number of the ball, and looks it up.

diordnas — 2015-11-21 00:07:24 UTC

Jet: Gold

Maths limerick: 12 + 144 + 20 + 3√4 / 7 + (5 x 11) = 9^2 + 0 (Explanation: When read aloud, properly, it reads: "A dozen, a gross and a score / Plus three times the square root of four / divided by seven / plus five times eleven / Is nine squared and not a bit more" )

diordnas — 2015-11-20 23:49:18 UTC

Jet: Silver

Why do mathematicians confuse Halloween and Christmas? Because 31 Oct = 25 Dec! (Explanation: Oct is short for Octal (base 8) and Dec is short for Decimal (base 10) )

diordnas — 2015-11-20 23:39:55 UTC

Jet: Gold

Imaginary numbers are fun until someone loses an eye.

diordnas — 2015-11-20 23:39:21 UTC

Jet: Silver

Platinum Awards:

1089801 — 2015-11-19 23:16:08 UTC

Sandro: 1 Triple Platinum, 1 Double Platinum and 1 Platinum.

Will: 1 Double Platinum and 1 Platinum.

Ajhor: 1 Platinum.

System message:

1089801 — 2015-11-19 23:13:20 UTC

Due to posts flooding the padlet, wait until tomorrow to post. Thank you and have a nice day.

Due to posts flooding the padlet, all Bronze posts will be deleted. Thank you and have a nice day.

diordnas — 2015-11-19 22:43:23 UTC

Last night I dreamed that I was weightless! I was like, 0mg (0mg = Zero Milligrams)

TheGreenCow — 2015-11-19 22:40:26 UTC

Jet: Silver

Three statisticians go hunting. After a while they find a single rabbit. The first takes aim and undershoots, the second takes aim and overshoots. The third yells "We got him!" (Explanation: the average place the bullets hit was the rabbit)

diordnas — 2015-11-19 00:57:22 UTC

Jet: Silver

2015-11-19 01:09:52 UTC

Sandro: Silver

diordnas — 2015-11-19 01:09:07 UTC

Jet: Silver

diordnas — 2015-11-19 01:08:42 UTC

Jet: Platinum

diordnas — 2015-11-19 01:08:18 UTC

Jet: Jet: Jet: Silver

TheGreenCow — 2015-11-19 00:51:26 UTC

Sandro: Gold

Jet: Gold

TheGreenCow — 2015-11-19 00:50:12 UTC

Sandro: Platinum

Jet: Platinum

diordnas — 2015-11-19 00:38:48 UTC

Jet: Gold

Water joke: HOH HOH HOH

diordnas — 2015-11-19 00:22:58 UTC

Jet: Silver

Old chemists never die, they just stop reacting.

diordnas — 2015-11-18 23:41:43 UTC

Jet: Silver

Q: What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar? A: OH SNaP!

diordnas — 2015-11-18 23:40:17 UTC

Jet: Silver

Q: What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium? A: HeHe

diordnas — 2015-11-18 23:36:19 UTC

Jet: Silver

Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"

diordnas — 2015-11-18 23:35:59 UTC

Jet: AU

Helium walks into a bar, The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here." Helium doesn't react.

diordnas — 2015-11-18 23:35:41 UTC

Jet: Silver

What is the most important rule in chemistry? Never lick the spoon

diordnas — 2015-11-18 23:26:16 UTC

Jet: Silver

Anyone know any jokes about sodium? Na

diordnas — 2015-11-18 23:25:42 UTC

Jet: Gold

If the silver surfer and iron man teamed up, they'd be an alloy

diordnas — 2015-11-18 23:13:30 UTC

Jet: Silver

diordnas — 2015-11-18 23:08:25 UTC

Jet: Silver

Old mathematicians never die; they just lose some of their functions.

diordnas — 2015-11-18 22:57:10 UTC

Jet: Silver

The B in Benoît B. Mandelbrot stands for Benoît B. Mandelbrot.

diordnas — 2015-11-18 22:48:43 UTC

Jet: Gold

A physicist, a biologist, and a mathematician are sitting on a bench across from a house. They watch as two people go into the house, and then a little later, three people walk out.The physicist says, “The initial measurement was incorrect.”The biologist says, “They must have reproduced.”And the mathematician says, “If exactly one person enters that house, it will be empty.”

diordnas — 2015-11-18 22:48:00 UTC

Jet: Gold

Q: How many mathematicians does it take to change a light bulb?A: One: she gives it to three physicists, thus reducing it to a problem that has already been solved.

diordnas — 2015-11-18 22:47:27 UTC

Jet: Silver

A: “What is the integral of 1/cabin?”B: “log cabin.”A: “Nope, houseboat–you forgot the C.”

diordnas — 2015-11-18 22:46:18 UTC

Jet: Silver

There was a statistician that drowned crossing a river… It was 3 feet deep on average.

diordnas — 2015-11-18 22:45:53 UTC

Jet: Platinum

TheGreenCow — 2015-11-18 01:08:37 UTC

Jet: Silver

Will

TheGreenCow — 2015-11-18 01:00:42 UTC

Jet: Gold

diordnas — 2015-11-17 23:15:28 UTC

Jet: Silver

Ajhor

wellshutup — 2015-11-17 23:10:14 UTC

Jet: Gold

Ajhor

wellshutup — 2015-11-17 23:09:51 UTC

Jet: Silver

Ajhor

wellshutup — 2015-11-17 23:02:39 UTC

Jet: Gold

Put Doctor Who jokes on my Doctor Who padlet or die. This is not a joke, it is a system message.

jetthe1089mathnerd — 2015-11-17 22:54:52 UTC

Ajhir

wellshutup — 2015-11-17 22:40:05 UTC

Need an ark to save two of every animal? I noah guy.

Sandro: Silver

Jet: Silver

Ajhor

wellshutup — 2015-11-17 22:48:10 UTC

A man assaulted me with milk, cream and butter. How dairy.

Sandro: Silver

Jet: Silver

Ajhor

wellshutup — 2015-11-17 22:46:24 UTC

When William joined the army he disliked the phrase 'fire at will'.

Jet: Gold

Sandro: Platinum

Ajhor

wellshutup — 2015-11-17 22:41:20 UTC

So what if I don't know what apocalypse means!? It's not the end of the world!

Sandro: Gold

Jet: Gold

Ajhor

wellshutup — 2015-11-17 22:38:11 UTC

I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down.

Jet: Gold

Ajhor

wellshutup — 2015-11-17 22:35:57 UTC

Jet: Silver

Sandro:

jetthe1089mathnerd — 2015-11-17 22:35:49 UTC

Since you posted eight platinum jokes, you are ADMINISTRATOR!!!!! (Soon)

Two men walked into a bar. One ordered H2O. The other said "I'll have some H2O too." The second man died.

TheGreenCow — 2015-11-17 02:57:01 UTC

Sandro: Platinum

Jet: Gold

What do you call an avocado cut into 6.023 x 10e+23 pieces? Guacamole.

diordnas — 2015-11-17 02:54:54 UTC

Jet: Gold

Sodium sodium sodium sodium sodium BATMAN!!! (The chemical symbol for sodium is Na)

diordnas — 2015-11-17 02:52:45 UTC

Jet: Silver

diordnas — 2015-11-17 00:53:58 UTC

Jet: Platinum

diordnas — 2015-11-17 00:44:30 UTC

Jet: Silver

Have you ever tried to eat a clock? It's very time consuming.

MrSam123 — 2015-11-17 00:43:53 UTC

Sandro: Platinum

Jet: Silver

diordnas — 2015-11-17 00:43:07 UTC

Jet: Silver

diordnas — 2015-11-17 00:42:52 UTC

Jet: Double Platinum

diordnas — 2015-11-17 00:42:37 UTC

Jet: Platinum

I'd tell you a chemistry joke but I know I wouldn't get a reaction.

MrSam123 — 2015-11-17 00:36:42 UTC

BTW I am Sam

Jet: Silver

Thieves had broken into my house and stolen everything except my soap, shower gel, towels and deodorant. Dirty Bastards.

wellshutup — 2015-11-17 00:34:36 UTC

Jet: Gold

Medal list:

jetthe1089mathnerd — 2015-11-17 00:22:19 UTC

None: 0-4

Bronze: 5-6

Silver: 7-8

Gold: 9

Platinum: 10

Double Platinum: Two Platinum awards.

Triple Platinum: Two Double Platinum awards and moderator.

Quad Platinum: Two Triple Platinum awards and admin.

I entered 10 puns into a competition, hoping at least one would win. Sadly, no pun intended (no pun in ten did)

diordnas — 2015-11-17 00:15:47 UTC

Jet: Silver

Mod list 16/11/15:

1089801 — 2015-11-15 23:27:45 UTC

Jet

Sandro