Ielts Writing - Topic: FARMING by Hoàng Anh Lê Hồng

The development of farming and scientific way is the better way to vegetables and fruits.In the modern scenarios,the cuisines were manufactured used to chemical for growing

2021-08-11 13:03:54 UTC

Huy

Linh

harukama191012 — 2021-08-11 13:06:37 UTC

By adopting scientific methods of cultivation, farmers have developed their crops significantly. The increase in population leads to the higher demand for food products. The only way to meet this need is to increase production. Since the old methods of farming are not very effective, modern methods like factory farming are required. They help increasing yield and making food products available to people all over the world. Scientific methods also lenghten the life of agricultural products. Consequently, many seasonal fruits and vegetables are now available throughout the year. Scientists are even able to grow cold climate fruits like apples and grapes in the warmer country with tropical climate.

Nguyet

2021-08-11 13:08:30 UTC

There are several reason leading to this support. Firstly, those methods of farming can increase the speed of growing from trees. In order to harvest enough products for selling, farmers have to speed up the growing progress by all means. That's why modern ways of farming are invented. Secondly, creating new genes for fruits and vegetables will attract the curiosity of customers, thus the outcome of farmers will somehow increase. New things always make people curious, so even if it is good or not, customers will still buy it at first glance. In that way, farmers can still earn a little amount of money even if it is the only chance.

Giang

2021-08-11 13:12:18 UTC

Agriculture in modern world has been given support from technological advances, scientific investigation and the governments in order to ensure the country's food security. Nowadays, farmland is being narrowed as the result of rapid population growth and the process of industrialization. Therefore, agricultural areas are transferred to residential ones or replaced by the factories. Meanwhile, people’s demand for food is increasing. Farmers, in this case, have difficulties in growing food in limited space. Therefore, more concentration is needed to produce high yielded crops and ensure the livelihood of farmers in smaller land.

Hùng

2021-08-11 13:18:16 UTC

The development....bring us so many benefis. Firstly, bigger and faster factories increase our food income; therefore, we wil live in a higher life standard, or we could partly solve world's food shortage. Moreover, many countries's food industry would grow. Secondly, scientific food creation really help scientists in their studies and invention; which produces sufficient things like more effective medicine, machine and...

HP

2021-08-11 13:21:38 UTC

one of two main reasons why the development of agriculture is highly supported is its benefits in food and utilize supplies. farming livestock provides not only edibles but fashion accessories such as feathers or wool. farmers then have the opportunity to make profits by trading or selling these products.

Khánh

2021-08-11 13:22:27 UTC

Some general comments- Hoang Anh

lhhoanganh — 2021-08-11 13:48:13 UTC

Khánh: I posted what you wrote down in your notebook here.
Huy: you didn't even answer my question either
Hùng: be more careful and specific. You used to be much better than this.
Linh and Nguyet and Giang: I would give you specific feedback later but at least I know you put efforts in your work. Informative and pretty smooth, well done.
Phương: I could see your nice ideas. BUT You are so cautious that sometimes you become much slower than your peers. Your paragraph could've been much better than this. Where is the 2nd reason?. Be more result-oriented. Sometimes it's not that neccessary to waste your time overthinking.

For Linh and Giang

lhhoanganh — 2021-08-15 03:57:19 UTC

Farmers and customers alike could benefit from the use of scientific cultivation methods. As the world's population grows, so does the demand for food. In the context of limited arable land, improved production appears to be a practical and seemingly obligatory way to meet this demand. Since conventional farming methods usually take a long time and produces low yields, modern ones such as factory farming are inevitable in order to to boost the productivity and make high-priced/high quality products more accessible to people of different income ranges. - Hoang Anh-

For Hùng

lhhoanganh — 2021-08-15 04:15:29 UTC

Agriculture development has numerous advantages. First, larger and faster factories contribute to an increase in our food income. As a result, we will have a higher standard of living, or we may be able to solve the world's food shortage to some extent. Furthermore, the food industry would expand in many countries, resulting in more job opportunities.
I have not fully understood your 2nd point. I'm trying to figure it out and correct it.
- Hoang Anh-

For Nguyet - 2nd point. 1st point => Check what I did with Linh and Giang

lhhoanganh — 2021-08-15 04:43:19 UTC

Customers' curiosity will be piqued if there exist more novel genes for fruits and vegetables, and farmers' profits will rise as a result. People are naturally intrigued about new things. Therefore, regardless of whether the product is high-quality and suitable for them, they tend to buy it at first glimpse if it is fresh and new. Farmers, meanwhile, can still make money this way, even if it is their only option.

I'm trying not to change your ideas but only to sharpen it. Hope this works.
-Hoang Anh-

For Phương

lhhoanganh — 2021-08-15 04:50:59 UTC

The benefits agriculture gives in terms of food consumption and accessible resources for other sectors is one of the two key reasons for its development. For example, animal husbandry supplies fashion items such as feathers and wool, in addition to essential protein for human use. hard-working farmers, as a result, can then make money by trading or selling what they raise.