When I was first diagnosed with cancer, I did not think too much of it. To a lot of people, getting the news that they have cancer comes as a negative shock accompanied by depression and sadness; not to me though. I kid you not, when my doctor gave me the news I simply said, “oh okay; thanks for confirming”. His face dropped; he was not sure how to react to my response, and even asked me if I was not scared to which I then replied, “nah, I already knew”. To this day, I am still not sure why I reacted in such a numb way, and it still boggles my mind how I went through that whole journey not really worrying about the situation. I am not sure why I cared so little, but I can say without a shadow of a doubt that not caring was one of the main reasons I was able to persevere. Leaving things to God’s will and not worrying about things I cannot control has been one of the greatest assets I have come to possess. It is something I like to emphasize to others.

 

One of my favorite experiences from college was that we had a section in a class in which we would all share our accessibility before we started. In this way, I learned how to be honest with the way I was feeling. It made me realize that having a sad or painful day was okay. This reminded me that I am strong, and that whatever I am going through will work itself out somehow. I think it is crucial for us to acknowledge the way we feel, process it, and then accept it for what it is. Pain, after all, teaches us how to live.

 

For someone who has lived for almost three decades, it is hard to deny that I would not be where I am at if I had not lived through a life of pain. I have seen every member of my family endure the harshest of pains, I have gone through various life-threatening events as well, and I somehow cannot seem to stay down. As such, these harsh situations have made me a far stronger human being. I used to believe having cancer was the worst thing that has happened to me, but the older I get, the more I realize it is the best thing that ever happened to me. Through cancer I met some of the most wonderful people, I discovered who I really am, and most importantly, I found my true purpose. I wouldn't be doing the things I am currently doing if it had not been for cancer. I am resilient because of my tribulations; sometimes, I even feel immortal.

 

I have lost valuable friendships due to a lack of these moral and social elements. I have made personal mistakes that have indirectly affected people I loved and cared about. However, I understand now that these loses are all teachable moments for my future. It is these experiences that make me want to become a better person. It is why I try to be more empathetic, compassionate, and kind to others. I have reaped what I sowed. However, I have the opportunity every day to change, and become a better me than I was yesterday and the year before.

There is nothing I respect more than someone who has a genuine, kind, and compassionate heart. People who are there for others at any given moment regardless of the circumstances. People who are selfless. People who put others first because they know they need help. People who go out of their way to help a brother out even when they are struggling to have ends meet in their own household. People that say, "Sorry, but I really can't right now", and figure a different solution for you regardless. If you have someone like that in your life, keep them and look after them the way they do with you. People like that are extremely rare. I want to be more like that.