Hypocrisy Dilemma-David-ETH 1.0 TTH 8:30-11:30 1st Semester Cycle 1 SY 2021-2022 1 by Peter Jonas David https://padlet.com/peterjonasdavid/yt2l2768qrnltc97 Jay and his mom were on the way home from attending an evening at school for parents and teenagers. The event was designed for parents and teens to build communication skills around the issues that kids face during high school. The night had gone so well that Jay decided this was a good time to ask his mom about drugs. He had been wanting to do that for a long time, but figured he’d just get a lecture. He wanted something more real than that. Jay told his mom about a party he had recently attended where some of the kids were smoking pot. Jay had never smoked pot before and he was tempted to give it a try, but he declined because he thought about what his parents might do if they found out. Now seemed like a good opportunity to find out exactly what they would do. So he asked his mom. She replied that she would be terribly disappointed in him. That she would feel she had failed as a parent. That she wouldn’t be able to trust him anymore. That she would seek professional counseling for the whole family. Her answer seemed pretty clear, until– A few weeks later, the family was packing for week in Boracay. As Jay was helping to load the last of the bags into the trunk, he knocked over his mom’s bag and a small pipe fell out. He picked it up and saw traces of pot left in the bottom of it. Now what? All the way to the airport and in the plane, Jay replayed that moment of finding the pipe. The hypocrisy was too much. Now, what should he do? Should he stay quiet and assume this gives him a perfect excuse to smoke pot, or should he confront his mom and tell her what it felt like to find the pipe in her bag? All Jay knew for sure was that he resented having to make this choice at all. If you were Jay what would you do? What are your choices and alternatives? Who are the stakeholders? What are the consequences of your actions? en-us 2021-08-13 02:39:32 UTC 2023-01-19 06:24:19 UTC hello@padlet.com mdizon1348 https://padlet.com/peterjonasdavid/yt2l2768qrnltc97/wish/1681254559 If we were Jay, we would automatically confront the mother. There are several approaches to this. First would be in a civil  manner wherein Jay would understand where the mother is coming from based on their previous conversation. Thus, he would help her addiction and seek professional help for her. The second manner would be using an aggravated or resentful approach. The consequences to this would be distrust and resent rising in the family which would break their relationship. The third and last manner would be not confronting the mom at all. If Jay chooses to be quiet, it will only build up his anger and "sama ng loob" inside which may, in turn, result into serious consequences such as a fight and Jay resorting to drugs himself. Overall, the stakeholders in this dilemma are Jay, his mom, and their family.]]> 2021-08-17 01:14:56 UTC https://padlet.com/peterjonasdavid/yt2l2768qrnltc97/wish/1681254559 dlazaro0042 https://padlet.com/peterjonasdavid/yt2l2768qrnltc97/wish/1681266327 - Communication is key to maintaining trust between any relation. I believe in the saying “children see, children do” and the fact that being older does not justify acts that you prohibit your child or someone younger than you from doing. Although people are older than us does not excuse them from the prohibitions that they themselves have implemented. I would confront my mom with respect, and ask her reasons behind using that specific drug.

- An alternative to better understand the situation–assuming that the mother is the one using the pot, one alternative is to ask a person who is trustworthy for advice. This person may know the mom well and would know better on how to approach her about the situation. They may even know the reasons behind the mom's actions.
- Stakeholders include the primary family, other relatives, and people who are included in the mom's circle of acquaintances who may feel the need to step in in case the confrontation gets out of hand. When others become aware of the mom's action, they might start to form an unfavorable image of the mom.

- We should also consider the reason why the mom raised these prohibitions might be because she was already experiencing and anticipating the things she mentioned to her son, from herself. Looking at the situation from her point of view, she would not want the same for her son hence her reaction to Jay's question. It's also possible that the mother is using it for medical use and is more cautious of using it. She might just be worried that her son might misuse it, considering he might not have any illness that would require the drug.

- The consequences of his action (in this case, confronting his mom with respect) is that he will have trust issues, he may look at his mom as a fragile being or the mom may explain and have a good reason behind her vice. Through this, Jay would understand his mom more and could possibly spark a closer relationship between the both of them.]]> 2021-08-17 01:23:06 UTC https://padlet.com/peterjonasdavid/yt2l2768qrnltc97/wish/1681266327 arodolfo0256 https://padlet.com/peterjonasdavid/yt2l2768qrnltc97/wish/1681266794 Collectively as a group, we decided that it is better if Jay just confronts his mom and clarify why she had a small pipe in her bag. He can also ask why she had to give us that lecture when his own mom may have been using drugs as well.  The main consequence we can see is that this may affect their relationship as a family because not only is their mom secretly using drugs but also breaking the trust of their family. 

Since the main stakeholders in the situation are the members of Jay’s family, he may consult his dad and tell him what he saw and what his mom had to say about Jay possibly using drugs. Another alternative is Jay can also seek help from their guidance counselor on what he can do to address the matter if he is too afraid to bring it up to his dad first. Once Jay has figured out what he is going to do, he must approach his mom in a way that she knows he is not judging her for what he knew she was doing but because he wanted to clear things out before actually forming his own opinion on what happened. Jay should know first why his mom is using drugs because she may or may not have a good reason for using it. 

Once they assessed the problem and if the reason why the mom is using drugs is because of an addiction, they can help her by going to rehab or they can work on it as family by going to counseling sessions if ever it is needed.
]]> 2021-08-17 01:23:24 UTC https://padlet.com/peterjonasdavid/yt2l2768qrnltc97/wish/1681266794 ldequit0156 https://padlet.com/peterjonasdavid/yt2l2768qrnltc97/wish/1681277607 1ST CHOICE:

Each choice has its own consequences and benefits. He needs to have a private and close conversation with his mom about it in order to better understand the situation they are in and decision his mom made. We cannot fully comprehend another’s decisions, but we will better understand it if we ask the other person. We cannot just assume why people do this and that. It’s also the same with the decisions that the people close to us make.

Talking to your parents about their choices doesn’t necessarily mean disrespecting them, it could also mean that you respect their decision. Clarifying things mean that you acknowledge their role in your life and you want to understand their choices most especially the ones that affect you.
]]> 2021-08-17 01:29:56 UTC https://padlet.com/peterjonasdavid/yt2l2768qrnltc97/wish/1681277607 ldequit0156 https://padlet.com/peterjonasdavid/yt2l2768qrnltc97/wish/1681278359 2021-08-17 01:30:26 UTC https://padlet.com/peterjonasdavid/yt2l2768qrnltc97/wish/1681278359 ldequit0156 https://padlet.com/peterjonasdavid/yt2l2768qrnltc97/wish/1681279807 The stakeholders are Jay, his mom, and his family. Jay is the major decision maker. His mom’s actions and decisions affect the overall mindset of Jay. Their family will be affected no matter their decision.]]> 2021-08-17 01:30:49 UTC https://padlet.com/peterjonasdavid/yt2l2768qrnltc97/wish/1681279807