lee jaehwan. 

where do i start? i've never gotten married before (no shit) so this speech might be uh- awkward and and and boring and idk- emo? ; ; and where do i start? aa a aa lets start when we first met. when we first met- it was in aoi. i remember the day like it was yesterday heh. you came to aoi - i was already there but yeah. i was hacking hongbin and then ravi was hacking hongbin - the three of us hacked each other and you were there in the vixx gc ,,, laughing everything off. i was so excited yaknow - to have a ken to complete vixx. days passed, we got to properly talk yes - me as hyuk and you. you as you. the thing is - ever since you got to the rp, its like- i look forward to talk to you every damn time. i feel sad whenever you're on tl but not talking to me. i guess there's where my lil crush for you started. you were - funny and cute and i was so so so happy whenever i see user @aoikeken around. but then - i had to take a god damn hiatus cause of my shitty exam. though i was still around (lurking) despite being on hiatus cause i wanted to see if you mentioned me or not. idk i saw you and joy together, talking on tl and i got so jealous. and when you told me to introduce you too luda too. my inner self was screaming "no" but like - i hid that side away from you. cause yeah i don't want to be obvious but i want it to be but idk not yet? i also remember when i was flowerboy hyuk, and i dedicated flowers to people. remember? yeah and you were the last person to like that tweet and i was sooo damn happy that i could dedicate a flower to you. i wanted to input my feelings into the flower of choice to you - it was so hard. to find a flower with double meaning. but i did. the amaryllis. and you asked me if it was a hibiscus dhdhdjdj so cute i can't cries. the common meaning for the flower is pride- and i told you that you have that pride, that i want to have too. but aside from that- the flower means desire to court and that's what i really want to put in screams. 

i also remember on the last day of my exam - i went out with my friends and jhope was there. he told me that - you liked me. at first, yeah. my heart bloomed, full with hope but i couldn't bring myself to make the first move. i'm such a chicken. but well - you were the one who started the dm. so yeah - we talked more on tl than in dm, and yeah jhope kept teasing you and i asked you to spill what's happening but you didn't want to so i told you i'd ignore you - and i did!!!! and it was so damn hard okay to ignore you ; - ; so i approached you via dm and yeah i asked you what's the truth, is it true that you like me, cause i don't want to get my hopes high. the funny (not really) part is that my phone died during the confessing i h8 and yeah i was outside at that time so i stayed dedt for a couple of hours. cries. and yeah. it was true that you liked me too. so we like each other- everything went so fast. we were fast. but now that i think of it, i don't regret it one bit. cause if i was late - i'd lose you and it would be too late. and i didn't want that. kinda why i wanted to make you mine quickly. 

we got together- but didn't announce to base yet. i was so excited on it that you're finally mine and yeah. we went on our first date 👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀 and i don't know what happened to me- i don't know what strucked me but my inner self was saying - don't let him go. and i kinda did tell you that - that i don't want you to let me go and you said you won't. that's the same night you said "i love you". it made my whole night ;; whole day whole year even and tbh whole life ;;;; 

we've been in countless of fights, lots of banters and if i were to list all of them - it would be really really childish to the people who reads this cries. we've fought over the smallest things. remember that time we fought so badly? that we kinda put our relationship to a pause? we left the rp too. it left me shattered you know. i was so - fragile at that time. i couldn't believe it happened too. when i woke up and look at my phone only to get a slap to the face as reality hits me- that you aren't there. it was so hard. i was so lost and confused. scared too. that i lost you because of my own words. one of my biggest fears. 

i couldn't eat well, i cry myself to sleep every night, i wondered if you ever miss me, i've never stopped thinking about you. we have that song padlet too- i kept on updating that padlet. i deleted twitter too tbh. but i reinstalled it after a day- and got a message from you. it wasn't much but to me it's so much. and i know from that point- that i can still try to get back to you. and i succeeded in doing so. thank you for giving me another chance in loving you. 

you mean the world to me. i always say this, i'm the type to not care but you're special. you are different. but really in all honesty, you are different. you're the first person i'd fight for. my relationships don't last long cause i get tired easily. i get tired of people, and i run away from them by disappearing and never coming back. that was the me before i met you. i was such a douche i caused heart breaks and now i feel the worst. i'm the type to move on easily. but you - not you. i want to fight for you. i want to be with you. i- ahhh how do i express myself to make you understand me cries. you're just - different from the rest. you pull me towards you like no one else can - you have that attraction that makes me fall deeper into you that at this point, i won't ever turn back. never have i ever put so much effort, so much comitment to make a relationship work. you have this something that makes me so so so tied to you. i'm chained up to you. 

basically - you are the one. 

we've been through a lot to get to this point. wait did i say that above? no? okay honestly i forgot- but well that's not the point. the point is - you've seen all of me, love. in and out. i'm already exposed to you even the deepest pit of myself. its to the point where i feel like you know me more than myself. and i can't love you enough for that. 

i can go on and on about this but people would probably sleep on my speech- so i guess i'm gonna keep it short. 

i vow to you- that i am going to love you to the fullest. your being shall be my priority. i vow to put you above anyone else in any given situation. i will be by your side, for better or for worst. i will experience and take risks and every journey spent will all be with you. i'm not the most perfect human being that the world could offer to you but i will try my best to serve you with the best and only the best love that you deserve. i shall love you with all my heart, my being and my soul. thank you for choosing me as your life companion, i shall not let you down. i am yours forever and nothing will ever change that. i vow to be yours forever. 

now, i don't know how to end a wedding speech. and yes i know my speech might be shorter than yours cause last time i checked you said its 4 pages. chokes. but nevertheless, i spilled my heart's contents into this and i hope my deepest thoughts could reach you. i love you so much, lee jaehwan. 

and i am yours to keep forever and always, ad infinitum.