Tamar was a brilliant student who was passionate about teaching and learning mathematics. Her love for her work shone through in everything that she did.

She was also one of the kindest and most generous individuals I have had the privilege of knowing. Her focus was always on others and how she could assist and support those around her. She will be greatly missed.

With deepest sympathy,

Karen Hollebrands

I had the pleasure of working with Tamar during several phases of my career. First, when I was a graduate student she was a facilitator in professional development that I researched. Then, more recently, she worked with Dr. Hollebrands and I on a professional development project for teachers across NC. Her commitment to our teachers was remarkable. She shared her knowledge of the National Board certification process at such a deep level that our teachers were very successful in their endeavors to becoming Nationally Board Certified Teachers.

Tamar is so thoughtful, kind, and brought joy into all the spaces she entered. May her legacy live on in all of those she taught.

Sincerely,

Erin Krupa

Your classes were always so fun, and we could tell that you were passionate and truly cared about us. Throughout your time at NCSSM, you touched the hearts of so many students, and I am so happy I got to know you in class as well. Your smile was infectious, and so was your enthusiasm. We will forever respect you and carry your memory in our hearts. 🤍

I’m a parent of a Durham senior. When we came to Welcome Day for the first time, it so happened that Tamar was the first person we met. We were afraid of everything—the move to the dorms, the new school, the unknown—but after speaking with her, we suddenly felt that we’d be supported here. That it would feel like home. And of course, we immediately thought, “If everyone here is like Tamar, this is the right place.” And truly, everyone has been wonderful! But Tamar—she was one of a kind.

I don’t know where she found the time and energy to give so much of herself to her students. I admired her deeply. Her office was filled with all sorts of little things and souvenirs, each with a story behind it—and she could speak about each one with enthusiasm and joy. She had so much sincere love, so much admiration in her. During the two years we knew her, I wanted so many times to shower her with flowers and words of gratitude, but I always held back, thinking it might not be appropriate while I was still the parent of a current student.

I kept waiting until graduation, when I could finally invite her over or maybe take her out for coffee to celebrate our daughter’s math successes—the very successes Tamar had helped bring about. And now I’ve run out of time.

The last time I saw her was in mid-April, just in passing. I asked how she was feeling, and she assured me she was doing quite well. I felt such deep relief and joy.
And now I can’t shake this deep sorrow.
But I hope that, with time, this sorrow will become a lasting memory—of someone truly unforgettable.

Goodbye, Tamar.
We will never forget you.

Second, I would like to share a short story about how Dr. Avineri opened my eyes to what education should be.

During my time at NCSSM, I took multivariable calculus with Dr. Avineri. I was not a particularly good student in her class. I often fell asleep in class, and I did quite poorly on homework and exams.

After one of our exams, Dr. Avineri sent me an email asking me to stop by her office for a meeting. I knew I had done poorly on the exam. I was sure I was about to get a lecture on how I was in danger of failing her class or how I needed to take things more seriously.

Instead, she took the time to go through every problem I got wrong on that exam. She asked me to explain the concepts and talk through it with her. When I couldn't, she took the time to explain them to me. Not only did Dr. Avineri take the time to individually walk me through things, she also gave some points back as we worked through each problem together. I ended up passing that exam and that class because of her extraordinary effort as an educator.

She did not need to do any of that. In my time since NCSSM, I have met many educators who would have simply given me the grade I earned and moved on with their lives. I have met many who would have refused to give any opportunity to earn back points in that sort of situation, even if I had begged for the chance. I have met almost none who would go out of their way to call in a bad student and take the time to ensure that they succeeded.

Dr. Avineri was a unique individual who refused to give up on her students. It was a small thing, nearly a decade ago, but that interaction still deeply influences how I think about education. Her legacy is one of compassion for others and passion for education.

To a math teacher who taught me so much more than math, thank you.

She always showed me and others warmth, respect, appreciation, and a genuine care, which I felt in every interaction. Generous with her time and energy, Tamar had an infectious positivity about her and palpable enthusiasm for education and the institution. But more than that, she was the rare person that seemed to be able to tangibly improve the lives of all others she touched, whether those be colleagues, students, parents, or visitors.

I had the privilege of getting to interact with Tamar in her last few weeks, running a Professional Development session she attended, and in spite of her declining health, she remained her wonderful self: lighting up the room and engaging in discussion with me and other faculty.

Tamar's presence will be dearly missed.

I tell anyone who will listen that Dr. A's trig class changed my life then, and even more now. I struggled in the traditional pre-calc when I first got to NCSSM - not because I didn't know math, but because I didn't truly understand how or why it worked. After being put back a level to the trig class, I was emotionally and mentally defeated. But Dr. A never let me stay there - she rebuilt my confidence and love for math by helping me draw connections that were always right in front of me, but never fully grasped.

After graduating college, I went on to teach middle school math for a few years; it was her patience, kindness, and tenacity that I always strived to embody with my students. I wish I could have shared that with her.

Thank you for everything, Dr. A! You are truly one of one and I hope to carry on a small part of your legacy through my continued love for math and being a little encouragement for any young woman who may need it along the way.

Over a period of several hours last week, I heard at least three different people (independently of each other) say “Tamar was the kindest person I’ve ever known.”

Tamar had a quiet humility and strength that we should all aspire to. She was an extraordinary teacher and colleague, and her work will continue to benefit students across the state and the country for many years beyond her time here on earth. We are all better for having known her.

The last time I saw Tamar was several weeks ago. I arrived at work and was walking toward my building when I noticed movement up and to my left. I raised my eyes to see Tamar nearing the top level of the exterior staircase to the Mathematics department floor. Even with late-stage cancer, she was pushing ahead, skipping the elevator and taking the stairs to her third floor office. It was humbling, inspirational, poignant to witness. It was who she was in so many ways.

The day she passed away, I had sent an email reminder to a group of instructors regarding an upcoming meeting. I received an out-of-office autoreply from Tamar saying she would be out of the office “for several days.” I later realized, once I received the sad news that afternoon, that she was already gone before the autoreply reached my inbox. I fished the autoreply out of my email trash and saved it to my “Keep Forever” folder. Her last words to me then: Warm wishes, Tamar Avineri

Rest in peace, sweet friend. Thank you for everything.

I was heartbroken when I heard Tamar passed away. Tamar fought her battle on her own terms — working up until just a week or two before she passed. You'll hear everyone say “But she was just here... I just saw her the other day!”

That was Tamar. She persevered. She always showed up with a smile, climbing three flights of stairs to her office every day, asking others how they were doing, and always insisting she was “just fine.”

She made a conscious effort to connect with people — often going out of her way to check in, listen, and care. I honestly never heard her complain. You had to pry to find out how she was doing... and even then, she’d still say she was okay, often with a warm smile. Finally one day she asked, "Can I have a hug?" In our very last conversation, I asked how she was doing. She responded, “I’m doing really, really well! Feeling great and grateful. How are you?”

Tamar has fought the good fight. Tamar has finished the race. She indeed kept her faith. Rest in peace, my dear friend. I will deeply miss you.

Sending my condolences to her family, friends, and others who had the pleasure of knowing such a sweet soul.

As a friend, she had a mindfulness and grace that was incomparable, "adopting" my family and caring deeply about each passion and struggle we lived. The authenticity by which she lived was a great example to me and I will always strive to reflect that if only in my small way. With this authenticity came an unparalleled aura of humility. She was the best of us and the world is forever dimmer for her loss.

My friend, thank you for letting me be a part of your life. I am forever changed through the privilege of knowing you.

When I came to NCSSM as a junior, I was sad to hear that she would not be teaching math courses on campus during my time as she would be focusing more of her time on her doctoral studies at NC State. During my time at NCSSM, she checked in periodically and provided excellent advice whenever we met for coffee near campus. When I had difficulties with AP Calculus junior year, she assured me that the math department wanted me to succeed and gave me the confidence to go to tutorials and any teacher's office hours that would assist. If it were not for her assurance, I am not sure that I would have sought out the help that I needed to help me succeed in calculus.

We lost touch over the years, but I was so excited to hear that she had recently won the UNC system-wide excellence in teaching award. I know that she was more than deserving of such an honor. When I commented my congratulations on the school's Facebook post, she reached out to ask how I was doing. She was so excited to be able to call me Dr. Brooks the next time that I came to campus as I was close to defending my doctoral dissertation at the time. After all those years, she was still excited for my success and could not wait to celebrate this milestone. Unfortunately, I will never hear her call me Dr. Brooks.

As an aspiring educator, I will make sure to bring her kindness, warmth, and excitement for student success into every space as doing so will ensure her lasting legacy lives on. I will miss you so much Dr. Avineri.

We will miss you so much -- you will always hold a special place of respect in all your students' hearts.

Even when she wasn’t present, just mentioning her name brought smiles. The ripple effect she had on the NCSSM community is one of pure love and quiet strength. She is one of the few people I can truthfully say I’ve never heard a single negative word about. You would never know the battle she faced each day; she carried it with grace, always putting others first, even when I came to her with my comparatively small calculus struggles.

I miss her. But I’m comforted knowing she’s free from pain and watching over all of us as we continue to grow. The hardest part of loss is not where they go, but who’s left behind. My prayers are with her family, friends, students, and everyone who was touched by her heart. Thank you, Dr. Avineri, for everything.

Rest in Peace

She encouraged me to apply for my National Boards and to present at as many professional conferences as possible during my time at NCSSM. Tamar was always ready to listen to my new presentation talks and provide valuable information on how to make them better. We shared a passion for attending conferences and spending hours talking about what we heard and how we could bring into our classrooms.

We were in the beginning stages of planning a JTerm course to co-teach next year. Early on we discovered we both had a passion for Theater and would discuss shows that were happening at DPAC. We decided we should host a theater JTerm for the students at NCSSM.

Beyond school she built a strong relationship with my wife and two young girls. She attended every birthday party and even purchased my daughter her first mickey mouse purse. Addison and Tamar shared a common love of Mickey Mouse. Every time Addison would visit she would run to Tamar's office to say hello and to see all the Mickey Mouse figurines, and just when Tamar finished showing her all of them Addison would say "Again!". Without hesitation she would start back at the beginning and talk about every single mickey mouse in her office. To have someone that engaged with your family will never be forgotten.

One of the many things I will remember about Tamar is her strength. Since her diagnosis I have worn a bracelet as a reminder to pray for her and encourage her in her fight. This past March I participated in one of my toughest running races I have completed and the entire time I kept seeing the bracelet on my wrist, and all I could do to keep myself moving was to think of Tamar's strength.

Although my time with her was short, the impact she had on my life and my families life will last forever.

Each year at TCM, Tamar generously shared her knowledge and ideas. She was always open to dialogue, always willing to explore a mathematical concept further, and always brought joy into every conversation. The last time I saw her was at this year’s conference, where she presented on Markov chains with her characteristic clarity and enthusiasm.

Tamar was an incredible educator, a kind and generous colleague, and a truly radiant person. Her positivity and warmth were felt by everyone who had the privilege of learning from or working with her.

My deepest condolences to her family and the entire NCSSM community. Tamar’s legacy lives on in the lives she touched and the minds she inspired.

With love and support,

Veena Krishnan

The Nueva School

Going into my senior year, Dr. Avineri was there advising me as I submitted a paper to a journal. Even as she was undergoing cancer treatment - something that I viewed to be a sign of her improving health - she continued to teach and mentor me and others, providing immense support and giving many words of encouragment and wisdom. I remember meeting in her office, over Zoom, and in other places to discuss my work. I remember one day she was working through my paper in her favorite coffee shop while I was in a Zoom meeting with her. Even though it was noisy, she persisted in having the meeting and insisted on advising me.

I saw her as a friend. I looked forward to maintaining in contact with her in the future to speak to her about her experiences, to speak about how her creative teaching style and contagious enthusiasm have led me to wherever I will be, to speak to her about my own ambitions and dreams and how she once had them too. I looked forward to Dr. Avineri being in my life even if we were far apart from one another.

Dr. Avineri was a good person. I regret that I wasn’t able to say goodbye in the way that I would have hoped. She was kind. She was respectful. She was a wonderful teacher, never giving students the answers but instead guiding them toward it. She represented a fleeting hope for education in this country, always loving and prioritizing her students and defying the ordinary: she saw education as a greater opportunity, and she wanted to impress better education and ideas upon developing people. She even had a great sense of style - even as she was undergoing cancer treatment, she wore a fashionable wrap around her head.

There is so much more good to say about Dr. Avineri that it is impossible to contain all of it within this short piece - I wish I would have been able to learn more about her and her past, as well as her future. Dr. Avineri will be missed by many, and I will never forget how she has impacted me.

-- Matias

I know this award meant the world to her...just like it did to the many, many that have been impacted by her teaching and her love for it all!

Dr. Avineri, you are missed each day but your legacy lives on for all the days to come. Those you have impacted will pay it forward by shining your light wherever we go. You made every person you met feel valued and cared for. You selflessly and with constant joy gave your time and your energy to all those around you and embraced positivity with resilience and never failing gratitude. If the many who have known you can keep even a part of that beautiful light in our hearts and shine it on others...the world will be a better place...because we knew you, Tamar. Your friendship has meant the world to me and I believe there will always be a chair for you at Trader Beans where I will often go to sit and think of you as I aspire to hold on to your light and to do all that I can to reflect that light on others as you did!

Deepest condolences to your mom and your siblings and all of your family. Tamar spoke of you all often with such love and joy! And sympathies to our NCSSM community and all that she was to us and this community to her as she shared that "NCSSM is not just my employer; it’s family, too, and I want to remain here as long as I’m able.” You are loved and will continue to inspire us every day, Tamar.

Her concern and kindness will be remembered by so many and her impact on the lives of her students and colleagues will endure.

Condolences to her family.

Maria