Author explains that understanding habits lets companies/individuals influence behavior for better or worse. I am exploring how we can use this insight to influence students' behavior for better behavioral or learning outcomes.

Some takeaways

1)Identifying habits Through Data to detect habit loops either positive or negative habits- late-coming, late submission, survey responses etc

2) Influence habit through targeted cues - design cues to trigger desired behaviors. for example, we can use online or real world poster to trigger students' response in healthy eating or use of learning tools.

3) Creating new habits to plants new routines- how can we nudged students to have good habits and routines. i.e: use of google calendar and use of online tools to track learning.

As challenging it was to read, I was rather intrigued by what I read in the second part of the book, which was on why we should negate reward and punishment, particularly for a class. The discussion, which read more like a debate, was on the beliefs (by the Philosopher) that children must know that they are able to accomplish thing on their own. Throughout this part, the philosopher elaborated on these principles such as how praise and punishment are detrimental for children’s development. Children who rely on seeking praises as a form of reward will only work towards achieving them or in the absence of praises, will refuse to put in anymore effort towards their work. As for children who does something wrong, he also shared that it is important that must not be quick on meting out punishment as a form of punitive measure but rather through the experiences of the child in witnessing the effects of their actions, learned about consequences and the meaning of their action. Focus on helping the child and providing them with constructive feedback while encouraging them.

The young teacher for most of this part was largely in disbelief and at a certain point, incensed of his principles. He even told the Philosopher “Your understanding of people is too naïve” and “I wish you would just dispense with this old man act of making them out to be a bunch of pure-hearted angels”, words that resonated with my feelings towards what I was reading from what the Philosopher shared. But as the Philosopher started to share on the five stages of problem behaviour, I began to understand more of his principles and how it might work. However, at the end of this part, I am still not wholly convinced that the Philosopher’s approach towards negating rewards and punishment without actual case studies of successful implementation.

 2. Rosenberg introduces the foundation of NVC: Observations, Feelings, Needs, and Requests.  I find that our feelings are linked to our own needs, not others’ actions. While responding to criticism or negativity: blaming ourselves, blaming others, sensing our own feelings and needs, or sensing others’ feelings and needs, it helps me to recognize that focusing on feelings and needs (both our own and others’) leads to more positive outcomes (pg 49).  The use of positive action language to make a distinction between making requests and demands is also interesting to me as it would require me to use clear and specific objectives than rejecting what I don’t want to give greater clarity. (pg 74)

3. Learning about NVC makes me more aware of what I want to achieve in my communication and be a lot more circumspect with how I want to talk to people around me. I should also learn to suspend judgement and use compassionate communication to elicit more from the listener.  This will also make my communication less vague and ‘beating around the bush’.

4. The framework provides structured methods for addressing disagreements, focusing on needs rather than blame, leading to quicker and more peaceful resolutions when engaging with challenging students or colleagues.  Practicing deep listening and responding with empathy can help to improve relationships with the people around me as well, as we are all working in such human-centric work in school.

I had expected practical ideas around online learning, but the book surpassed those expectations. It offered a compelling, human-centered vision of what education could be—more personalized, more inclusive, and more empowering. That depth of thought continues to resonate with me every time I return to it.

2. What are some points from the book that resonate with you or that you found interesting?
In Part 2 of the book, a chapter titled Homework, really stood out to me because it challenges one of the most deeply ingrained aspects of traditional education. Salman Khan questions not just how much homework students should have, but whether the concept of homework itself is even effective. He argues that the real issue isn’t quantity—it’s purpose. This reframing made me reflect on how often homework becomes a box-ticking exercise rather than a meaningful extension of learning.

3. How has the content of the book impacted you?
Although this book was written over a decade ago, its insights still feel incredibly relevant. It made me reflect deeply on how rigid and outdated many educational systems continue to be. I found myself questioning the true value of grades, standardized testing, and the overwhelming emphasis on homework. Khan’s critiques helped me see that much of what we take for granted in traditional education may not be serving students in the best way—and that reform isn’t just possible, it’s necessary.

4. In what ways can your learning from this book enrich you both professionally and personally?
Professionally, it encourages me to embrace continuous learning and to support more inclusive, flexible approaches in teaching. Personally, it’s a reminder that learning doesn’t stop at school—it’s a lifelong process. I’m more motivated to seek out knowledge in ways that suit my pace and curiosity.

1) I chose this book because it might help me to understand myself better and to handle anxious feelings.

2) It did describe the thoughts correctly (pages 5-11), and it also provides solutions for four areas: thoughts, life obligations, relationships, and surroundings.

3) I still find it difficult to practice, as some of the solutions I have already been practicing from what I know in the Bible.

4) Life is short, actually. As long as you know who is backing you up, everything will be fine.

I wanted to find out how and why the founder of Khan Academy conceptualised his idea of teaching via low cost video production.

2) What are some points that resonate?

The suggestion of getting to know the concept before coming to class is basically flipped classroom. The role of the teacher in the classroom is to deepen learning and the role of the students is have personal responsibility to get to know the concept before coming to class so there could be deeper discussions. "Taking education for learning IS learning".

3) How has the content impacted me?

"Presence of teacher is a source of thought paralysis" - I often think that after rapport is built with students, students will grow more confident to express themselves in class. However, they are humans with feelings. When answer is expected immediately and students grapple with the fear of disappointing me, it may not be entirely effectively. Thus, adopting a video approach gives students time to think and make sense of the content basically being more prepared for lesson

4) In what ways can your learning from this book...

According to the author, in a traditional classroom, time allotted for learning is fixed but comprehension of concept varies across students. This is insightful to me and is something I see in my daily teaching. I have a fixed number of periods but not all my students will grasp concepts at the same time. We can't shift traditional classroom immediately but we can make tweaks to accommodate to different levels of student readiness. In life, there are certain things that are fixed and there are also variables. You can't make everything into variables as you don't have control over everything. It is essential to identify the priority which is fixed, and what I can do to manage the variable.

2. What are some points from the book that resonate with you or that you found interesting? (Include page numbers where possible.)The book group de cluttering into 4 areas: thoughts, life obligations, relationships and surroundings. I zoom in on mental de cluttering.

   
   

3. How has the content of the book impacted you? suggestion to help me be more aware of their thinking patterns, learning how to respond thoughtfully rather than react impulsively resonate with me a great deal. But meditation and breath exercises is a stretch for me. I suppose I might try it at some point. I reflected about the day often, and occasional journal, so that concurs with me.

   
   

4. How has the content of the book impacted you? As mentioned earlier, it makes me think of not just de cluttering as a physical thing, but a mental exercise as well.

   
   

5. In what ways can your learning from this book enrich you both professionally and personally? I hope it can help me make better decisions; be less impulsive.

   
   

The book draws heavily from Adlerian psychology, much of which was new to me. I found many of Adler’s ideas relatable, especially the notion of education as a means to develop self-reliance, the emphasis on respect (ability to see a person as he is) being the cornerstone of all interpersonal relationship, empathy being an attainable skill, and the distinction between trust (belief with conditions) and confidence (belief without conditions). These concepts resonated with both my professional and personal experiences.

That said, some parts of the book felt overly idealistic. For example, the portrayal of education as a task that students should engage in independently, with minimal interference from teachers or parents, and the idea that educators should have absolute confidence in their students. I often found myself identifying more with the youth in the book rather than the philosopher, as the conversations reflected dilemmas we encounter daily in real-world classrooms.

The book reinforces ideas I strongly believe in, such as growth mindset and lifelong learning. But beyond that, on a personal level, it also reminded me of the importance of personal agency, that we can choose to affirm “myself now” (our current selves), choose a life we love, and contribute to others not out of obligation, but out of love. It reminded me that happiness is not something to chase externally, but as something that can be created through my choices.

I do wish I had read The Courage to Be Disliked first which is the first book in this series. Nonetheless, I enjoyed the book as it made me reflect more deeply on what it means to live purposefully and educate meaningfully.

2) The book draws heavily from Adlerian psychology, which was very new to me. It linked itself to the previous book, Courage to be disliked, and followed the style of using the philosopher and the youth.  Which opened concepts to our interpretation. It wasn’t about telling you what to think, but more about inviting you to think, and reflect.

3) I found myself thinking on many points such as doubts of idea, frustrations faced, and the questions he raised felt very real to me. But each time the philosopher replied, I would pause and reflect on what was being said. It brought me to shift my thinking and consider a different perspective. An example which struck me the most was when he mentioned about rebuke and praise, of all my years I realizes I have been very much on rebuking students when they are wrong, and to praise them for their little victories to spur them on, but the book brought another perspective for me to think about.

4) The book also discussed about how some behaviours are often driven by deeper goals. This gave me a clearer view, and a more empathetic view on why some students behave the way they do, and how we might respond differently from now on.

2) "Ultimately, everyone has to make his or her own meaning out of things. It's not more content that students want; it's meaning." (Chap 10) This part resonated with me because I realised that emotions are very important when it comes to learning, and can help spark attention, make personal connections and help students process information better.

3) The book gave me greater insights on how the brain is adaptable and how a healthy brain learns best.

4) There were a few brain-based classroom strategies introduced in the book that I could try in my own lessons, such as energisers or using music/visuals for memory.

2) Identifying the causes for the Mental Clutter - Pg 18 to Pg 23.

Daily Stress; Paradox of Choice; Too Much "stuff"; The Negativity Bias

3) Yes, it did help to look at current things differently.

4) I will adopt - Simplify your Activities into both my personal and professional. I use to write weekly what are the things I need to complete. In the book, they shared on focusing on three important daily goals, importance of give yourself time during the day, and most importantly leaving work on time

The book meets my expectations. While I anticipated simple mindfulness tips, I was surprised by the depth of emotional insight and the comforting tone that runs throughout the pages. It didn’t feel like advice from a distant expert, it felt like wisdom shared by a kind friend.

2. On page 13, Haemin Sunim writes:
“When your mind rests, the world also rests.”
This quote struck me because it reminded me that how I feel inside shapes how I see and respond to the world. When I am calm and centred, I am better able to support others and handle challenges. It reinforces the importance of caring for my inner state, not just for myself, but for the people around me too.

On page 45, he reflects:
“Do not fight your negative emotion. Observe and befriend them.”
This line resonated with me because I tend to suppress negative emotions in order to stay composed or focused. But this quote reminded me that it's okay to acknowledge difficult feelings instead of pushing them away. By observing them without judgment, I have found I am better able to understand where they come from and let them pass without being overwhelmed. It’s a simple but powerful shift that helps me manage stress and stay emotionally balanced, especially during tough moments at work or at home.

“When someone is rude, rather than react, try to understand the pain behind their words.”
This reframing helped me better empathise with others, especially in emotionally charged situations.

3. The book has gently shifted my mindset from one of constant doing to mindful being. I have become more intentional about creating moments of stillness throughout the day, whether it’s taking a quiet walk, putting away my phone during conversations, or simply taking three deep breaths before starting work.

It’s also helped me be more present and compassionate, not only toward others but also toward myself. I am learning to let go of self-judgment and embrace imperfection as part of being human.

4. Professionally, the book has reminded me of the importance of presence and empathy in leadership. When I slow down and truly listen, to students, colleagues, or parents, I respond with greater clarity and kindness. It also reminded me that leading by example in self-care and calmness can set a healthier tone for the team.

Personally, I started appreciating the smaller moments: quiet mornings, heartfelt conversations, and even just sitting still. The book has encouraged me to build sustainable habits of rest, which in turn fuel my resilience and joy.

1. Why did you choose this book? Did it meet your expectations?

I chose The Power of Habit because one of the units in our Secondary One Chinese textbook is also titled “The Power of Habit.” When I saw this book, I became curious to find out what the full version talks about and whether its ideas are connected to what I teach in class. I wanted to explore if the deeper concepts in the book could enrich my students’ understanding of the topic.

The book definitely met —my expectations. It not only explained how habits are formed and changed through a scientific lens, but also included relatable real-life stories. This made the reading process very engaging and gave me new insights I could bring into my teaching and personal life.

2. What are some points from the book that resonate with you or that you found interesting? (Include page numbers where possible.)

ne key idea is the habit loop — cue, routine, reward (Page 19), which helped me understand how habits form and why they are hard to change.

I was also impressed by the story of Alcoa (Pages 98–102), where focusing on one keystone habit — safety — led to major improvements across the company. It showed how small changes in focus can bring big results.

As a teacher, I found the Starbucks training (Pages 127–153) meaningful. It taught staff to build willpower through practice. This reminded me that students can also build self-control through consistent routines and guidance.

3. How has the content of the book impacted you?

This book made me realize that many of my struggles — like procrastinating on English-related tasks or not sticking to an exercise routine — are not about willpower, but about unhelpful habits. I used to feel frustrated with myself, but now I understand that habits can be changed if I focus on the right cues and rewards. It gave me hope that small, consistent actions can lead to real change.

4. In what ways can your learning from this book enrich you both professionally and personally?

Personally, I’ve started applying the habit loop idea to my own life — setting clear triggers and small goals for reducing my phone use and exercising. For example, I put my phone in another room when I’m working, and set a timer to limit screen time. It’s helped me feel more in control and less overwhelmed.

Professionally, the book reminded me how important it is to help students build good learning habits, not just teach content. For example, I’m currently thinking about how to help students develop a strong reading habit. Instead of simply telling them to read more, I can create consistent reading routines in class — like starting every lesson with 10 minutes of silent reading, and letting them track their own progress. Over time, this small routine could grow into a lasting habit.

2 & 3)

-Decluttering Your Thoughts: #2 Practice Acceptance (pg 39)

“You can’t completely eradicate your troubled thoughts during hard times, but you can lessen them through acceptance.” I need to let go of the people/memories/things that i cant change, learn to accept and make peace with it.

-Decluttering your life obligations:

Step 2: Revisit your current life (pg 65)

“Write a list of everything in your work that you do enjoy or view as positive - whether it’s the comfy chair or the client you really like. Write the same list for your personal life, including everything about your life that is working well for you.” “Sometimes we overlook positive things in our lives when we are so focused on the negative.”

I feel that this tip is important because it is really up to us to feel miserable if we want to continue leading our life thinking of all the negativities in life/work or continue to feel grateful with all other blessings in our life/work place.

-Decluttering your relationships: Practice #3: Express gratitude constantly

"We become so focused on what someone else has and how we don't measure up that we neglect to acknowledge all of the blessings around us." Similar to the point earlier, this tip helps me to understand that one way to declutter my mind is to not think about the good things elsewhere but focus on the good things that I am already blessed with.

-Simplify your Home (pg 102)

“…when your environment is cluttered, the visual chaos restricts your ability to focus”

This gave me the idea to clear certain things from my work desk and at home especially the kitchen and my kids room where i frequently go to. The more things there are, the more stressed i will get because i will not be able to locate the things that i need. Marie Kondo-ing the work space and home is a need to ensure i have a clearer mind. When my visual is less clutter, my mind will declutter too.

4) From this book, I feel some of the most important tips that I learnt which I can adapt to my professional and personal life is:

-remove the negativities from my mind, be more grateful with the blessings that i have in life be it at work or at home

-do not compare my life with others because everyone move at a different pace ("I'm on my own journey, which should be different from those around me." pg 79) -> This tip is also suitable for me to share with my students so that they do not feel discouraged and more motivated.

-remove visual clutter so that my mind can focus better

2&3)  “One of the challenges of modern living is figuring out what’s truly important and differentiating those from the obligations that seem important at first, but really don’t matter when you take time to examine them.” – Page 44

“Because your core values can serve as a measuring stick for all of your choices and decisions in life, keeping you focused on the person you want to be and the life you wish to lead.” – Page 45

These quotes stood out to me because they emphasize that living without a clear sense of values leads to confusion, stress, and misalignment. When we aren’t sure what truly matters, we tend to say yes to everything—and end up overwhelmed by obligations that don’t add value to our lives.

Understanding and defining my core values—such as peace, presence, family, and purposeful living—helps me make better decisions. They serve as my personal compass, ensuring that I spend my energy on things that genuinely align with the life I want to lead.

4) “Sometimes our schedules take over our lives, and we don’t give much thought to whether or not we are spending our time in ways that contribute to the mental clutter and stress that is so debilitating.” – Page 112

This quote was a powerful reminder that busyness is not the same as productivity or purpose. Without conscious planning, our days become filled with low-impact activities that drain us.

The book offers some practical strategies that I found especially helpful:

•  Prioritize your daily goals – Focus on 3 meaningful goals a day instead of endless to-do lists.

• Purge unnecessary commitments – Say no to tasks or events that don't serve your values.

• Reexamine your children’s schedules – Simplify their routines too, so the whole family breathes easier.

• Leave space for rest and reflection – Not every moment needs to be filled.

Applying these strategies may help me simplify my schedule, and I can possibly find myself less rushed and more centered.

Was looking for some scientifically proven/ tested strategies that are effective in helping students to learn better. I was hoping for more success stories, but the book did provide some detailed research on the factors that affect learning and some recommended stragies.

2.What are some points from the book that resonate with you or that you found interesting? (Include page numbers where possible.)

p.128: The brain's 3 "hardwired" motivations and these include curiousity, anticipation and behavioural relevance. I find this knowledge useful and do find myself tapping on curiousity (for instance through storytelling) to elicit motivation.

p.137: Another interesting point is the importance of state change which refers to a shift in the current physical, emotional or psychological state of a student. This change can support and even reinforce learning.

p.189: importance of forgiveness and to develop the skill whereby one acknowledges the pain and takes control of the hurt. Forgiveness promotes better physical and emotional health.

3.How has the content of the book impacted you?

Reminded me that there is a lot of learn from different disciplines and to keep refining my craft.

4.In what ways can your learning from this book enrich you both professionally and personally?

Reminded me of important lessons such as the importance of forgiveness and factors that impact learning like emotions.

It has also introduced me to some interesting strategies to improve learning such as utilising sensory inputs in the classroom (p.19) through a variety of sounds (music, videos, whispers, etc.) and the importance of RCC to the brain (p.165, readines, construction, consolidation).

2. What are some points from the book that resonate with you or that you found interesting? (Include page numbers where possible.)
a) The Habit Loop:
It consists of three steps — Cue / Trigger (which tells the brain to use a specific habit), Routine (physical, mental, or emotional), and Reward (which helps the brain decide whether the loop is worth remembering). Over time, this loop becomes more automatic, and a new habit is formed. (Pg. 39)

b) Habits can be ignored, changed, or replaced:
Once a habit emerges, the brain stops fully participating in decision-making—unless we deliberately create a new routine. This explains why we are often encouraged to step out of our comfort zone. By learning to observe the cues and rewards, we can change the routine, which means we can form a new habit. (Pg. 40-47)

c) To change a habit, we must understand basic human psychology:

1. Identify a simple and obvious cue.

2. Clearly define the reward. (Pg. 56)
   However, these two elements alone are not enough. The cue, routine, and reward must be put together in a way that cultivates a craving, which drives the habit loop. (Pg. 69)

3. How has the content of the book impacted you?
Part One of the book deepened my understanding of habits. In Chinese, we often say, “习惯成自然” ("habit becomes natural"). However, this book explained how a habit is actually formed and why it can be changed or replaced. It gave me a foundational concept of habits, which may help me and my students change bad habits.

4. In what ways can your learning from this book enrich you both professionally and personally?
Personally, if I want to change a bad habit—such as not drinking enough water—I can start by placing a colorful cup on my table (the cue). Then, I can create a routine, such as setting an alert on my phone every two hours to remind me to drink. If I successfully drink 1000ml per day, the reward could be praise from my family, which I would look forward to.

Professionally, in a teaching and learning context, if I want to cultivate a reading habit among students, the cue could be a daily reminder and positive role modeling from the teacher. The routine could involve reading together with students, showing them how to take notes instead of just reading passively. The reward could be small prizes or certificates that recognize their reading effort.

1. Why did you choose this book? Did it meet your expectations?

Interesting book title! I didn’t expect that emphasising on feelings (which can make one vulnerable) would be part of the communication framework introduced in nonviolent communication (NVC). Perhaps because of my own lived experiences and upbringing, it never felt natural for me to emphasise on how I feel (especially “negative” feelings). It’s a work in progress for me, especially as it is also something that I do want to do more in my work as an SWO - to be open and comfortable in talking about feelings with my students and with their families. 

2. What are some points from the book that resonate with you or that you found interesting? (Include page numbers where possible)

I appreciate NVC as it acknowledges that all behaviours are attempts to meet needs. As part of my work, I came to realise that a lot of these students who are missing school, are behaving this way in order to meet other needs outside of school. Perhaps to be near people who cares for them, perhaps to be away from situations that make them feel bad about themselves. It has been an integral part of my work and I connected very well with this. The framework of NVC that helps us to communicate with empathy – Observation, Feelings, Needs, Request. So putting it in my work context, it might look like this, “I noticed that you have missed school for the last term (observation), and I am feeling concerned (feeling), because I care about your well-being (need), and I am wondering if you would be willing to discuss more about this (request)”. I would definitely want to incorporate this into my conversations with my students/ families, to connect with them at the emotional level.

3. How has the content of the book impacted you?

NVC talks about empathy, not just towards others but also towards the self. I find that very powerful especially for us working in a school setting, where we are the frontliners managing some of these children’s distress. It is a timely reminder that we should show empathy to ourselves – because only when we take care of ourselves, we can take care of others. Using the framework, perhaps a self-reflection exercise can be asking ourselves at the end of each day, “what am I feeling now”, “what am I needing”, and “can I speak to myself with the same empathy/ kindness I offered to a student”.

4. In what ways can your learning from this book enrich you both professionally and personally?

Being more intentional in my conversations. communication, through incorporating Observation, Feelings, Needs, Requests (OFNR) in them (when appropriate). I believe it is also important for me to invest in building rapport with the student/ family first, so that the use of the OFNR would not appear to be inappropriate or awkward.

2. The discussion about lifestyle/world view that emphasized how our background and circumstance do not define us. I had to read this subchapter (People Always Choose Not to Change, page 30) a few times as it clashes with my understanding of the way individuals are "made".

3. It makes me reflect more about my reaction (behaviour and emotions) to things that happen around/to me. I see the importance of stopping for a moment to choose the meaning i want to ascribe to them.

4. Motivates me to unlearn and relearn more, to not be afraid to try new things and possibly fail, to focus on what i can do next instead of dwelling on mistakes.

1. Why did you choose this book? Did it meet your expectations?

I chose Surrounded by Idiots because I was curious to see how this framework might improve communication and reduce misunderstandings. The title itself was catchy and slightly provocative, which drew me in.

Yes, the book met my expectations. The examples involving celebrities made the concepts easy to understand.

2. What are some points from the book that resonate with you or that you found interesting?

The different behavioral patterns of the DISA types caught my interest.

RED-D– Dominant (Goal-oriented)p16-27

How to recognize:

• Task-oriented and enjoy challenges.

• Make quick decisions.

• No prob being blunt. Extremely clear in the communication.

• Get bored with the quo status quickly.

Typical phrases:

• "We’ll do it my way. Now!"

• "Tell me what you really think. Yes, for real."

Watch for:

• Chop-chop --- Gets straight to the point.

YELLOW-I–Inspiring(Ppl-oriented)p28-36

How to recognize:

• Happy to talk and enthusiastic.

• Focused on creating pleasant relationships.

• Resourceful. Think outside the box.

Typical phrases:

• "That sounds fun! Let’s do it!"

• "Isn’t it amazing? I just love it to bits!"

Watch for:

• Motivated by approval.

GREEN-S–Stable (Supportive) p37-47

How to recognize:

• Calm and easy-going.

• Good listener.

• Never kick up a fuss unnecessarily.

• Prefers working behind the scenes.

Typical phrases:

• "How are we going to do this? It’s not urgent, right?"

• "Who? Me? I am not important. Forget that you even saw me"

Watch for:

• Warm tone, gentle facial expressions.

BLUE-A–Analytical(Detail-oriented)p48-61

How to recognize:

• Accurate and orderly.

• Asks lots of questions before making decisions.

Typical phrases:

• "Why are we doing this? What’s the science behind it?"

• "Is there any more material?"

Watch for:

• Being silent, don’t say a single word unnecessarily.

3. How has the content of the book impacted you?

The book shifted my mindset from judging to understanding. Now I understand that ppl might just be operating from a different color perspective. Examples:

1. What they value: Results (D), relationships (I), stability (S), precision (A).

2. How they respond to stress: D becomes controlling, I becomes emotional, S withdraws, A overthinks.

3. Group dynamics with them: D leads, I entertains, S supports, A evaluates.

4. In what ways can your learning from this book enrich you both professionally and personally?

Professionally, by recognizing different personality types, I can now tailor my approach—whether I’m giving feedback, delegating tasks, or resolving conflict. It helps create a more harmonious work environment.

Personally, it has improved my relationships with friends and family. I’ve become more empathetic when dealing with people who think differently from me.

2) I found the way the book was presented really interesting. Instead of just listing ideas or giving advice like most self-help books, it explores each concept through a dialogue between a rather frustrated, disillusioned youth/teacher and a calm, thoughtful philosopher. This format made the ideas feel more alive and open to interpretation. It wasn’t about telling you what to think, but more about inviting you to reflect and question.

3) I found myself resonating with the teacher on many points—his doubts, frustrations, and the questions he raised felt very real to me. But each time the philosopher responded, I would pause and reflect deeply on what was being said. It challenged me to shift my thinking and consider a different perspective. That, I realised, was one of the most powerful aspects of the book—it’s all about perspective-taking.

4) In Part 2, the discussion on rejecting both reward and punishment was particularly insightful. It made me rethink the way I understand motivation and discipline, especially in the context of working with students. The book also explained how problem behaviours are often driven by deeper goals, as understood through Adlerian psychology. This gave me a clearer, more empathetic perspective on why some students behave the way they do, and how we might respond more thoughtfully.

1. I saw this book being read by a lady while I was travelling once, and I thought that the title was quite interesting and on doing further research, I found the content quite thought-provoking, and therefore when the opportunity rose to suggest a book for our schools, reading list, I thought this would be an interesting choice. I found the book quite an interesting read as it was written in the form of a Socratic dialogue. As whether it has met my expectations, I would think that it provides quite practical insight into how one can be truly free and achieve self realisation.

2. One thing that resonated about this book is the idea that we have the power to create our own happiness, and to give shape to the reality that surrounds us. An interesting point that was mentioned on page 55 is about the idea of feeling of inferior and how the philosopher who is around 155 cm, but told by his friend that his height, instead of being something that makes him inferior actually puts people at ease because he doesn’t come across his intimidating, and this transformed his view of himself, and as a result, he did not attribute His height as something that devalued him. It is described as “transformation of values “. This switch in perspective is something that helps us to create our own reality, which makes us feel more confident in our sense of self, and this was an idea that I had heard from my teacher, when I was quite young, but I found it hard to believe back then. Another idea that resonated with me is the desire for approval of others. In page 138, the youth asks the philosopher “one has no choice, but to discipline oneself on the basis that other people are watching “. The philosophers response to this is to live such a life where you only act a certain way in order to look good in front of others is to live an unfree life, and in doing so one is trapping themselves into a never ending cycle of people pleasing.

3. It has made me realise how much agency we possess in order to shape our mindset and to create a sense of well-being for our day-to-day lives. We can transform our life by changing the way view things and there by creat a more positive and happy existence.

4. From reading this book, I can definitely change my mindset when I’m dealing with situation in the classroom such as instead of thinking why a student is behaving in a certain way and taking it personally I can objectively look at what are the reasons for the students behaviour and what the student is trying to achieve through such behaviour and try to find a solution on managing the root causes instead. It also helps in understanding that my task is guiding the students both academically and morally but I might not be able to find a ‘fix’ or please everyone all the time. Encouraging students and not just praising their wins is an important step in building their self confidence.

1. Why did you choose this book? Did it meet your expectations?

I think communication is an art and I would like to learn how to support others by being a better communicator or mediator who can de-conflict difficult conversations.

I guess it did meet my expectations — the anecdotes, narratives, tips and even exercises to test your understanding. Plus point would be being able to see how communication breaks down and how miscommunications were formed and that there is always a remedy for everything.

Basically the bulk of what was shared was pretty much what we know in theory, but may not have executed it the appropriate or intended way.

2. What are some points from the book that resonate with you or that you found interesting? (Include page number where possible)

• Distinguish between what we feel and how we think others react or behave toward us (pp42) This is important to me as it helps me better an objective judgment (for better  decision-making). This prevents projection of our feelings onto others, fostering clearer self-understanding; avoids miscommunication and build healthy relationships and helps me to separate internal struggles from external events.

• If we don’t value our needs, others may not either (pp56). This is important to me for boundaries setting — failing to assert needs teaches others that they can disregard them without consequences as people may assume it to be unimportant.

• It is impossible for us to give something to another if we don’t have it ourselves (pp103) eg we need empathy to give empathy. This is a value/belief that I hold close to — Depleted people struggles to support others, whereas self-care fuels generosity. If we lack something eg empathy and love, we can authentically offer them to others.

• Learn to hear needs regardless of how people express them (pp168). This is important to me and I’m very mindful of how I communicate with others because people express their needs differently and listening beyonds words can help uncover true concerns. In addition, validating hidden needs helps to build trust, reduce conflicts and encourage emotional safety. Most importantly, it’s important to focus on the “why”, rather than “how” to foster empathy and resolution.

3. How has the content of the book impacted you?

Communication should be done intentionally and empathetically, not just for others, but for ourselves too.

More often than not, conflicts and unhappiness arise because people’s needs are not heard; even if conversation becomes more intense and hostile, it is important to maintain respect and sieve out the needs of the other parties calmly and empathetically, without compromising on our needs.

4. In what ways can your learning from this book enrich you both professionally and personally?

I find the NVC Method applicable when communicating with students — guiding the students to do introspection by observing the situation, understanding their feelings and needs, as well as making requests appropriately.

It can perhaps be used to calm the students down and get the students to see the needs of people conversing with them and in turn get them aboard to make school a safe place for learning and for growth to take place positively.

2) “You’re the Only One Worrying About Your Appearance” (page 74–79)

This chapter had a strong emotional impact on me because it explores how feelings of inferiority often stem not from objective facts, but from comparison and competition, something I experience as a beginning teacher.

One line that especially resonated was:

“If there is competition at the core of a person’s interpersonal relationships, he will not be able to escape interpersonal relationship problems or escape misfortune.” (page 75)

This made me reflect on how much of my own stress comes from constantly comparing myself to others, colleagues, classmates or even online ‘model teachers’. I realised that my anxiety doesn’t necessarily come from being inadequate, but from fearing that I’m less than someone else. That shift in perspective was powerful.

3) The book helped me shift from constantly seeking validation to being more grounded in purpose and boundaries. For instance when I feel overwhelmed by students’ emotional struggles or demands from different stakeholders. It also gave me the courage to accept that some students may not warm up to me immediately and that’s okay. My job is to teach, to care and to lead with integrity, not to be liked at all costs. That mindset is helping me build resilience and emotional detachment in a healthy way.

4) Professionally, this book helps me develop emotional boundaries and assertiveness, which are critical as I navigate the uncertainties of being a beginning teacher. I’m learning to focus on meaningful relationships and not over-invest emotionally in every interaction or outcome. It’s also improving my classroom management in understanding each student on their own terms, not just as someone to ‘manage’ but someone to connect with. Personally, it’s helping me loosen the grip of perfectionism. I still care (a lot!), but I’m learning that not every small misstep means I’ve failed. And maybe, just maybe, I can be disliked and still be okay 😊✌️

I was first drawn to this book because of its title as it sparked a quiet curiosity in me; what am I missing out on in the midst of my busy, fast moving days? I wondered if there were moments of connection or clarity that I had unintentionally overlooked.

The author reminded me of the quiet strength found in slowing down and being present. It’s easy to get swept up by deadlines, student and family needs.

This book encouraged me to pause and reflect; not just on what I do, but on how I feel while doing it.

I was struck by the idea that peace comes not from changing our circumstances, but from calming our mind. As a teacher, this means showing up with presence rather than perfection and remembering that a calm teacher helps create a calm classroom.

The reflections on relationships reminded me to listen more openly, to respond rather than react and to approach each student with patience.

I am learning to embrace imperfection; both in myself and in my students and to slow down enough to truly notice the little wins and quiet struggles.

Quote from Pg 52 and 175:

A very modern dilemma: There are countless television channels but nothing interesting to watch. Too many choices make people unhappy.

There are many more ordinary hours in life than extraordinary ones. We wait in line at the supermarket. We spend hours commuting to work. We water our plants and feed our pets. Happiness means finding a moment of joy in those ordinary hours.

1. I like the title, as I was reminded when I was younger, I heard of saying that the slower the mode of your transportation that you choose to travel you will see or experience the country even more. The book touch on the different aspect of life and gave insight on how deal with them. And there are nuggets of wisdom that gives great perspectives

2. I like the part about we see the world by what our mind wants us to see. Sometime the negativities around us, is because our mind in that state of negativity will just direct us to focus on the negativity of the world. Raising our awareness and train our mind by having perspectives helps.

3. There is also this “peeling the label of the emotion” as the linguistic part of labelling the emotion is static and it stays, but observed the “raw” energy of the emotion and let it pass, somehow the emotion will dissipate with time.

4. Supposed to read the book slowly (as the title suggested) and also reflect. So need to have some space to practise. I like some new perspectives that the author introduce, and there are many practical aspect in relationship management, be with colleague, students and even family. I think practising it and testing it out maybe useful, and ultimately, I feel that the book emphasises a lot on relationship, which is very useful for life.I like the title, as I was reminded when I was younger, I heard of saying that the slower the mode of your transportation that you choose to travel you will see or experience the country even more. The book touch on the different aspect of life and gave insight on how deal with them. And there are nuggets of wisdom that gives great perspectives

These are a few phrases in the book that resonated with me:

1. Pg 31 “When we are joyful, our heart opens up to new things. When we are in a bad mood, we can’t be open to new things, no matter how wonderful they are. Without joy in our heart, our progress in life is slow and uninteresting.”

-Having the ability to feel joyful unlocks other insights that could have been clouded by negative thoughts. To me, it is also to have self-compassion towards own self where you care for yourself and be happy before you can make impactful contributions to others.

2. Pg 192 “Dream big but start small. A small adjustment can have a big effect on your life.”

-I like the idea of dreaming big but starting small to allow myself to live in alignment with my own rhythm rather than society’s relentless tempo.

I chose this book because I'm a BT and felt like I was obliged to pick something education related (hahaha) and did not have any expectations. It was a pleasant read however, and easy to follow. I think Salman has a very optimistic view towards education, which I appreciate.

Q2: What are some points from the book that resonate with you or that you found interesting?

He brings up mastery based learning quite a bit, which I do resonate with. However, I understand that it is also quite different from reality, as there is a constant pressure to move on.

I like that flipped learning is proposed as a complementing strategy, having students view videos online. Then again, it would work for students that are more self-directed.

I do think that certain school environments allow for the implementation of such strategies more effectively.

Q3: How has the content of the book impacted you?

Mmmm... just a little more hopeful about the education industry I guess.

Q4: In what ways can the book enrich you both personally and professionally?

I think there are overlaps in my personal and professional life. As someone who enjoys both learning and teaching, it reminds me of the many avenues learning can take place. Sometimes as a teacher I forget that I need to first learn how to learn, so that I can connect better with my students.

1. Choose this book as it teaches practical steps on what we can do to declutter our minds. I always feel like I have a lot of things in my mind, and it’s a constant battle with the many different thoughts running in my mind, this book teaches me ways to help myself.

2/3. One key takeaway was reframing negative thoughts (pg. 35-37). Noticing thought patterns and identifying triggers—whether a person, situation, or physical state—before they spiral out of control. Writing down the triggers helps increase self-awareness,

In part 2 of the book, was clarifying life priorities (pg. 49-52). Understanding what truly matters allows us to focus on what brings the most positive impact. Since priorities shift over time, regularly reevaluating them helps in letting go of unnecessary burdens and embracing new goals.

4. This book has taught me to be more mindful and intentional. By decluttering my mind, I can work more efficiently and approach challenges with a calmer perspective. I hope that by applying the strategies I would increase my self-awareness, and help me balance responsibilities and reduce anxiety when facing challenges.

2) What struck me was the theory that we can actually control our emotions. (Pg16) it states that if we were to blame our actions on our emotions (such as anger), then we are “taking away the responsibility from us”.

This is something i can resonate as a discipline teacher cz students always blame their anger/emotions for their wrong behaviour!

3) I also find the idea of theology v interesting, that allnour actions point towards a goal which we want to fulfil. Also the idea that we can control how our past affects us as the philosophy does not believe in trauma. So we can decide how we want our present, future to be.

4) i want to share w my students especially on the point that we can all control our emotions and should not shift the responsibility away by blaming it on anger management issues. This can be a good discussion start point when doing reflections with student offenders.

2. One point that resonated with me deeply was this quote: "You are not living to satisfy other people's expectations, and neither am I. It is not necessary to satisfy other people's expectations." (page 116). This stood out to me because I have spent most of my life trying to meet the expectations of my parents, teachers and loved ones. The philosopher's question, "If you are not living your life for yourself, then who is going to live it for you?" was especially thought-provoking. It reminded me that I need to take ownership of my life and choices.

3. The book has helped me shift my mindset. I now realise the importance of living in the present rather than dwelling on the past or worrying too much about the future. It also encouraged me to take full responsibility for my choices and stop blaming circumstances or other people.

4. Professionally, this book has given me more confidence in making decisions as a leader. I’ve come to realise that it’s not always possible or healthy to try to please everyone. That shift in mindset helps me focus on doing what’s right, instead of just doing what’s popular. It’s something I find important in both leadership and teamwork.

   Personally, the book encouraged me to live with more intention and self-respect. I feel more at ease being myself, speaking up for what I believe in, and accepting that not everyone will agree with me or like me and that’s okay!

1. The aesthetics of the book cover actually…the pull factor for me would be the colours used & then followed by the phrase, “How to be calm in a busy world.” I guess at that point of time, I felt like I needed “someone” to tell me to breathe, a little bit. Did it meet my expectations? Yes, it definitely did. For some reason, at some parts of the book, I read it loud enough for me to hear & it felt like I was advising myself.

2. Page 131 “No one is inherently good or bad. Only the circumstance in which we encounter each other is good or bad.” This acts as a reminder for me to not pass off judgements easily just because of an unpleasant incident & that all of us, are works in progress. Like stated in Page 95, “Nobody is perfect. Everyone has shortcomings.”

3. For most parts, this book emphasises on the importance of maintaining relationships with your loved ones, friends, colleagues & most importantly, maintaining a good relationship with our own self. “The Silent Observer” - As I got older, I enjoyed my alone time & I do find myself (when I get the opportunity to), pay attention to the stillness of the pause. And in that stillness, I am grateful for all the blessings in my life.

4. Professionally, this book gave me insights on how to be a good colleague, how to be a good listener & that there is no need to have the solutions, “Just listen sincerely” (Page 195). In our field of work, we tend to have pent up frustrations about certain things & in our business, we pushed it aside but it doesn’t really go away. Being there for your colleagues, let them know that I see you, I hear you - sometimes, one just needs a listening ear. On a personal note, I aim to continue to be a good silent observer of my ownself because I feel like when I feel calm & at peace, I can help those around me, wholeheartedly. “A selfless and kind act will lift your spirit and self worth…even a small gesture of help will make you feel better” (Page 38).

2. The sections on decluttering through mindfulness, meditation, and dealing with ANTs (Automatic Negative Thoughts) resonated with me. These ideas align with what I already know, so the book served more as a timely reminder—especially to return to meditation practices I’ve been putting off.

3. It reminded me of the importance of mindfulness, meditation, and managing ANTs. That said, it’s challenging to put these into practice consistently because of how fast-paced our lives are. It made me reflect that perhaps what we need more is to slow down.

4. It’s a helpful book to keep around—just flipping through it can be grounding. The reminders and strategies can support both personal well-being and professional focus, especially during stressful periods.

The book describes how one’s happiness could be measured by the level of contentment as he/she is always guided by his/her purpose in life. Something that I have been holding closely to in both my professional and personal life, I jumped straight into part III of the book – “The disease of community”. Its stated that the root of all evil is the principle of competition, which I found rather interesting. Be it in the classroom or beyond, the book talks about how we need to get rid of competition and instead, be guided by the principle of cooperation, and this is the basis for us to negate rewards and punishment. I believe this is essential as we work towards a common goal in the classroom, in our committee, in school etc. I do face some challenges in promoting the principle of cooperation in work, and this will always be work in progress and reading this book has helped me to identify a few strategies to work on this area better.

I was also intrigued by the concept of “one having to approve oneself, with one’s own mind” (vs. the notion of ‘seeking approval of others’). And this truly requires the courage to accept that each one of us is a ‘normal’ person. Instead of placing worth on being different from people, place worth on being yourself. That is true individuality. Hmmm…honestly, I would need a bit more of convincing to agree with this notion.

I am only halfway reading through the book but thus far, I am captivated by the different insights and most importantly, some things that I could try out myself. I hope to be able to invest more time to complete reading it.

Honestly, much of it isn’t brand new. We’ve always cared about building relationships, creating safe environments, and supporting students emotionally. But what this book does is give language and science to what we intuitively know—and it makes us more mindful and intentional in our practice.

It reminds me that every tone we use, every routine we set, every chance we give students to feel heard—it all shapes how their brains respond to learning. That’s powerful.

It’s a reminder that teaching isn’t just about delivering content. It’s also about creating the right conditions for the brain to actually receive and hold that learning. And that starts with us."

While I appreciated the reminder to slow down, I also thought about those who might find it really hard to rest. Some people feel like they’re “wasting time” or “falling behind” when they try to pause, and even when their bodies stop, their minds keep racing. This shows that rest isn’t just about taking a break; it’s about shifting how we see and respond to the world. If our minds are calm, the world feels more manageable; but when our thoughts are chaotic, everything feels rushed, even if nothing urgent is happening. I found these ideas meaningful, though honestly quite hard to apply in real life. Still, I think the author isn’t asking us to completely slow down overnight. He’s simply encouraging us to start small; like noticing when we’re mentally rushing, or letting ourselves pause without guilt. Maybe real rest doesn’t mean doing nothing; maybe it just means being fully present in whatever we’re doing.

Slowing Down to Be Present for Students

In the rush to cover syllabi, mark work, and manage admin, it’s easy to lose sight of students as individuals. When we slows down, they notice the small things: a quiet student needing support, a teachable moment, or a chance to affirm someone’s effort. Being present helps students feel seen, valued, and safe.

Self-Compassion for Burnout Prevention

Teaching is emotionally demanding. Reading the book reminds me that taking care of ourselves is not selfish but essential. Rest and setting boundaries allow teachers to sustain their energy and joy for the work.