Vent pad or wtvr idc by ✨🌚☆𝔗𝔯𝔢-𝔚𝔞𝔶~𝔄𝔢𝔰𝔱𝔥𝔢𝔱𝔦𝔠☆🌚✨

I was born autistic, i had trouble learning growing up and struggled to do normal things. I learned to do everything at the age of 3. Once i turned 3 my uncle raped me and i bled out, I was brought to the hospital and almost died. I forgot everything and had to relearn how to eat, drink, talk, everything. my dad abused drugged and starved my mom. he would beat my mom in the stomach which killed two of my baby brothers. he tried to kill me and my little sister. he got arrested when i was 6, which was also around the time i had relearned how to do everything. after growing up around so much violence i became very brutal and hateful towards everything and tried killing my sister which i can never forgive myself for. I ended up being diagnosed with ADHD and needed to take medicine because i began throwing things and running around cussing in kindergarten. My teacher called my mom asking her to put me on medicine or I'd never get out of kindergarten. the medicine helped but suppressed my hunger which has made me underweight. by the age of 9 i tried to kill myself because my dog which i saw as my only friend died and the feeling of how horrible i was to my sister made me feel better off not being there.

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-06-14 11:26:27 UTC

I have trust issues but have a hard time telling people no especially if they are my friends and i get used alot because of it but i dont know how to fix it when i stop saying yes i feel rude

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-06-14 11:27:48 UTC

I dont really know what else to talk about-

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-06-14 11:28:14 UTC

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-06-14 12:27:24 UTC

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-06-14 12:28:21 UTC

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-06-14 12:28:44 UTC

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-06-14 12:29:06 UTC

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-06-14 12:31:57 UTC

drive home today i saw a bunny that wont mean alot to most people but i just love nature so much .. it kinda made my day

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-06-15 00:32:00 UTC

ive started hearing voices and i cant tell if its just my thoughts or if i need more sleep

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-06-15 00:38:46 UTC

people always come at me saying "wtf" or "tf" when i finally try being myself and i dont try to say nun but that shit be hurtin bad, makes me feel kinda unwanted

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-06-15 01:11:39 UTC

I hate being in love and when they fuck up and start doin horrible shit and i try to leave they bring up how i promised to love them forever honestly makes me feel like shit thats the main way i get used

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-06-15 01:15:22 UTC

the first time i showed one of my friends my face they called me a fuckboy

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-06-15 01:17:46 UTC

I took it as a compliment till i tried talking to them again and they said i could just go talk to my hoes

they always assume i want them for sex and bring up their past relationships and how im just like their ex

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-06-15 01:21:17 UTC

all i wanted was somebody to be by me when i was at my lowest and stay there till i got back up

Its not that i try to be an asshole

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-06-15 01:28:27 UTC

Its just the easiest way to talk without mentioning the way i actually feel

i got compliment from somebody :)

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-06-15 01:34:50 UTC

they said i look like a cute emo femboy <3 idc if emo femboy seems like an insult it made me happy :)

they think theyre just online friends they dont realise how much they really mean to me

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-06-15 01:37:42 UTC

<3<3<3

id never kms over somebody online.. except-

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-06-15 01:41:53 UTC

Denki, Mai, Milo, Nathan, Oliver, Shino, Echo, Alex, Kait<<< these are my newer friends
My older friends id die over: Maria, (A different Mai), Jona, Jordan, Megan, Cruz, Jaz, JJ, DD, Farmer, Raid

so many people say they gon be with you forever and that you can trust them with everything and then you go to tell them shit and theyll just fucking ignore you..

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-06-16 05:59:52 UTC

theyll tell me hello and say that they love me but if i died theyd move on in less than in a week its not love thats just associating

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-06-16 23:50:37 UTC

they say theyd kill for me aint never killed before they say theyd die for me aint ever died before they say theyd do anything for me have they done anything like this before?

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-06-16 23:54:24 UTC

This song stuck in my heeaaaad

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-06-17 10:05:40 UTC

No matter what i do
oh~
all i think about is you
oh~
even when im with my boo
oh~
you know im crazy about you

a wise man once said "keep youre head up because if your head isnt up you wont be able to see the brightness of the sun infront of you" but for me the moon is always out and darkness surrounds me

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-06-17 23:48:22 UTC

green is for grass

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-06-18 00:37:24 UTC

red is for blood
white is the color of the worlds worst son
blue is his tears
brown is his noose

"i hope you kys" me to

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-06-18 00:40:34 UTC

"i hope you get shot" me to
"i hope you fall down and break yo neck" me to
"i hope you get beat up till you cant breathe" me to
"i hope you get in an accident and break yo knees" me to

was sad but nathan here no more sad

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-06-18 16:12:37 UTC

i was happy but kait here now more happy :D

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-06-18 16:36:57 UTC

i happy cuz i get to go eat but kinda bummed out i dont get to talk to my friends (kait since shes the only one talkin to me)

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-06-19 21:09:05 UTC

nothing even made me sad today i just feel like absolute shit i got good sleep i ate a good breakfast but i just feel like shit

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-06-21 19:59:44 UTC

if i become president im nuking all of america B)

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-06-23 21:21:25 UTC

im waiting for it to get better

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-06-24 15:37:21 UTC

but it never does

i aint gonna lie im not feeling like myself anymore everybody thinks im so cool so nice but its getting worse i dont wanna do it anymore honestly the pains getting too strong ive been going on for too long i try to help as much as i can before i decide to give up i pray for all my friends and family hoping theyll live fine without me one day i dont want anybody to change all my friends make me feel better about myself trust me its never yalls orr my familys fault its my own im such a piece of shit to myself i dont deserve myself or anybody else

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-06-29 04:16:49 UTC

im back :D my internet went out but im back :D

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-07-01 03:06:19 UTC

i just came back and already fucked up im gonna be crying for a good while love you guys

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-07-01 03:43:16 UTC

bro it hurts so bad and its all my fault this time so theres nothing to put all of it on

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-07-01 03:46:25 UTC

what the fuck is wrong with me

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-07-01 03:46:31 UTC

nevermind i got JJ back im happy :D

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-07-01 08:11:42 UTC

dances

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-07-01 08:11:52 UTC

ive never felt so happy

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-07-01 08:11:57 UTC

my vent pads dying time to talk about it in shinos pad :D

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-07-06 03:45:15 UTC

Dances the pp dance

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-07-06 03:46:18 UTC

is it weird that i actually thought about going bald and just being bald for the fuck of it

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-07-06 03:47:30 UTC

today i feel nothing im not happy or sad or mad or anything i just dont really feel anything or like doing anything

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-07-06 17:35:48 UTC

Today i decided to stop hiding im being myself again and idc what anybody says cuz im me and i like me fuck everybody that disagrees

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-07-19 22:55:54 UTC

sometimes i wonder if ill ever be sad again after i got my love back everyday feels 10x better when im talking to her <3

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-07-24 04:26:48 UTC

guess whos baack

Mopthefloorwithyourhead — 2022-08-11 12:29:27 UTC