GSEM 130 Journal by Elisabeth Shimada

From Elisa: Can't wait to hear your answers!

eshimada1 — 2023-08-21 02:09:26 UTC

Welcome to GSEM130! I can't wait to read your responses.

2023-08-29 17:06:24 UTC

My maternal/paternal families both have extremely conflicting views: my father’s side believes in true, joyous love, whereas my mother’s side believes in dedication and submission in marriage. Therefore, my views are also conflicting. My mother and father themselves raised me to see love as a deep, sacrificial bond: met with compromise, trust, and valued by what it brings into the life. (Stability, safety, and friendship) They want me to experience love, happiness, and great caring - something that they fought for themselves. As the third generation and only child, I expect myself to marry for social/industry alignment - but my Mom always encourages me to “feel my feelings.”

Bridget Wang

bmwang1 — 2023-08-29 22:12:24 UTC

I think, for my grandparents and parents, love has a lot to do with duty and obligation, doing what you have to do to make a living with each other and for the future. Being in love isn’t as important as being able to support your family, and I think that the idea that one has to be in love to be married or raise a family isn’t a requirement for them. I think that there’s a sacrificial aspect of love for my parents, sacrificing passion for stability for themselves and their children so that their children can then have the opportunity to find love and then marry for love instead of marrying for convenience. My parents’ love is rooted in companionship rather than passion and intimacy, and I think I’m able to view love with a little more romanticism in mind because my parents gave me a safe environment to be able to hope for that. My parents are immigrants, and their main purpose for coming to America was to make a better life for themselves and for their future kids, and in that light, I get to think about being in love and marrying for love and fulfillment more than my parents do. I think my view of love is centered around the hope and possibility of being in love, but it also reflects a sense of loyalty and perseverance that I saw with my parents and grandparents.

Joan Song

joansong1 — 2023-08-30 00:01:23 UTC

My grandmother has more than 6 siblings - in Korea, that was considered "normal" after the Korean War in the 1950's. She would tell me that her parents were compassionate towards loving each other even in difficult circumstances. In the next generations, both my grandparents and my parents share similar values regarding love. It is not as intense, but they support each other, become their best friends, and fight through situations. Throughout my childhood, I noticed they focused on their own (between husband and wife) relationship slightly heavier than the relationship with their kids, which had positive effects on the family, and it shaped my ideology on forming my own family in the future. Based on what I've seen, they took love seriously and depended on each other as assuring companions. However, in my generation in Korea, there is something I noticed. Media and news statistically report a dramatic increase in people who see marriage as unnecessary, followed by a negative rate of childbirth. Since both men and women are so independent and busy in their careers, many people tend to believe in casual love rather than committed, legal marriage which is now viewed as costly and "inconvenient." It was strange to see my cousin, who is currently 8 years old, have only 10 classmates when I had more than 35 at his age. On the other side, it was fascinating to see views on love change drastically in just a few generations, starting all the way from my great-grandparents.

jadagrif — 2023-08-30 00:42:25 UTC

Throughout the course of history love has changed tremendously as seen on a larger scale vividly portrayed through media. As well as a much smaller more intimate scale such as the familial relationships in my life. The generational relationships throughout my family history vividly coincide with the shifts of love and meaning of it throughout history. My great grandparents met in Italy through family. However my great grandfather was a citizen in America. When my great grandmother was set up with my great grandfather as her means of getting to America it helped move her “forward” in the world. Back then relationships during that time were clearly out of obligation, status and duty. Unlike many others they were lucky to share affections with one another although not the biggest priority in their relationship. Passion as discussed in the reading was less about a passionate love but more a passion to procreate and get further in life through marriage. Proceeding this generation is where my grandparents marriage fell. Which happened to be a time when women gained more individualism and independence which led to the increase in divorce and separation rates in the 1970s. My grandmother ended up leaving a marriage that did more harm then good and was not fulfilled with love. Into more modern times with my parents marriage, it is more clear that fulfillment and love are a bigger priority then societal status. However, their relationship was different than a traditional family as my parents do not necessarily live together and it is in interracial marriage.

Thomas Bittencourt

tbittenc — 2023-08-30 01:42:09 UTC

From generation to generation, my family has always been fairly open to love with views that have largely stayed the same. My parents for instance have always stressed the idea of compromise, especially with regards to the family. My mom has spoken openly about how since she loves my dad she's learned to "choose her fights" with him. Just to clarify, by "fights" she means deciding when to criticize his messy nature and when do ignore it. My maternal grandparents have a similar outlook, where if someone disturbs the peace then the other will communicate with them to resolve the issue through some compromise. It's also interesting how in each generation of my family, the maternal figure has always been the more vocal about love and resolve than the paternal figure. All members of my family however have always been, in some way, expressive of their love. One of my grandparents enjoys giving us gifts and sending Facebook videos or posts that they find, while another loves to hug us and FaceTime / WhatsApp whenever they can. There's also always been this notion that familial love extends past our actual families. This is the reason why some of my godparents (and my siblings') are the very close friends of my parents and not always connected to the family tree. Instead of referring to these people as family-friends, we call them tia/tio. I believe this is part of the reason why I've always stuck with a smaller circle of friends — people that I love.

Kasandra Santiago

kasandra17 — 2023-08-30 02:50:55 UTC

The views on love in my family have drastically changed over time. When coming down to analyze each relationship from my grandparents romantic relationship to seeing my brother's and parents romantic relationship. I’d definitely say that my grandparents and parents love is so much more tied to this compassionate love rooted in stability and love itself, in relation to my brother's romantic relationship which is more tied to this individualized love where one's self fulfillment is valued before things like marriage. Although there are still other factors to the changes in our familiar generations. For example, the way our families romantic love is shown has changed, it is now more expressive and the norms on how much affection is allowed to be publicly shown has drastically changed. Compared to relationships like my grandparents where they aren’t as affectionate and are more conservative when it comes to expressing public affection specifically. Switching lenses when it comes to a familiar sense there has been different changes in my family. When my parents were growing up one big thing they both had in common was that their parents never really vocalized their love. It was more like they knew they were loved but it was never normal to vocalize it. Meanwhile now my parents always vocalize their love and never go a day without saying the words like "I love you” to the point where it's odd, if we don't say I love you sometime in the day. Which in turn will make me a person that in the future always says I love you to my family or to those simply around me, that I love. This will then lead to the evolution where in my family it is a “norm” to be vocal with love, being something that stays the same from generation to generation.

Michael Blasi

2023-08-30 18:53:40 UTC

As time passes and we begin to adopt newer societal norms, society generally begins to adhere to these changes; thus, creating a “new normal” from a sociological standpoint. My family’s views towards love are no different. To begin, all four of my grandparents were married at extremely young ages, 17, 18, 19, and 20 to be exact. Being born within the time of Nuclear families, they opted for an extremely traditional form of living which consisted of a Breadwinner/Homemaker model, and respecting their relatively early marriage for countless years. Yet, this concept of love did not necessarily translate to all of their offspring. You see, my parents and many of my aunts/uncles were also married at very early ages and have approached love through the lens of “finding marriage as soon as possible” to grow a family as early as possible. However, a handful of my aunts and uncles have disregarded this familial norm, instead opting to constantly date around and stray away from early marriage, moving from partner to partner in search of “the one”. Finally, moving on to my generation, all of my cousins have opted toward this particular view on love, where instead of settling down early to secure a safe marriage, they tend to be far more apprehensive in their partner selection, perhaps fearing some of the constraints that marriage may bring to their lifestyle and careers. Therefore, as my family moves down from generation to generation, their views on love have changed as the newest generation tends to be more selective in who they choose to date, perhaps due to apps like Tinder and Instagram which open our generation up to a far larger dating pool than what was previously available.

Hannah Poulter

hpoulter2 — 2023-08-30 19:42:07 UTC

The views that my two sets of grandparents have regarding love vary greatly, with the grandparents on my Mother’s side valuing the compassion, kindness and warmth of one another. As a result of my Mum growing up in this environment where she constantly observed their playful, evidently ‘loving’ relationship, she has a very similar way of behaving in her relationships. On the other hand, the grandparents on my Father’s side view their relationship as more of a commitment based on providing for one another what the other may lack and focusing on the costs and rewards of the relationship in terms of the profit it yields for each of them. Having said that, with the way that the ideational perspective of society has changed concerning marriage and relationships, their relationship has evolved dramatically to one that is now more centred around affection, attention and warmth for each other. I believe the way my Dad views love is very much different from the love he experienced from his parents and grandparents growing up. Perhaps this is due to the fact that he was born in a later generation that had different values and so, when he was forming a relationship with my Mum and with my brother and me, he was deliberate in his actions and how he presented his affection in order to deviate from the kind of love that he felt growing up.

Dor Peretz

2023-08-30 20:21:52 UTC

My grandmother and grandfather married very young (by today's means), with her being around 19 and him in his early 20’s during their wedding. He was essentially her first relationship, and back then it was perfectly acceptable and even common to marry shortly after meeting someone or getting married to your first love/first significant other like my grandpa and grandma did. This is different to the generation after my grandparents, the generation to which my parents belong. In the times my mother and father got married, it was much less common to get married in the early teens/twenties. My mother initially married in her later twenties, had a divorce (which was definitely not common in the previous generation either) and then remarried my dad in her mid-thirties, bringing her child from her first marriage with her. This showed one way in which views changed from one generation of my family to the next in that in the first generation (grandparents) once a couple got married it was expected that they stayed together until the end of their lives, however in the following generation (parents) it was more acceptable to separate/divorce if feeling unhappy in the marriage as per the individualized marriage theory we discussed in class. Both my grandparents and parents married a significant other they loved, but my grandparents marriage was likely more for the sake of creating a familial unit, whereas my parents reasons for marriage was for companionship first, and family building second.

Melody Wu

wumelody1 — 2023-08-30 21:10:27 UTC

I only eat mangoes when they’re prepared by my grandpa.

In his shaky hands, fruits are transformed into special pieces of art, the way he takes his time to pick up the perfect fruit at the farmers market, the way he slowly peels off the skin and makes sure to cut it perfectly and not waste any juice, and the way he always takes the first bite to make sure that the fruit is sweet and good enough for consumption. This is his love language, and the truest and purest form of love I have the privilege of receiving. Growing up in an Asian household, in a culture that often values respect and traditions, “I love you” isn’t always spoken out loud. But I’ve come to find comfort in the small details and small acts of services that often go unnoticed, in a world that values grand gestures and displays of affection, I value the simple tasks that are imbued with care and tenderness. That is exactly how I would describe my family’s love language, and it has always been like this. Based on what I’ve seen, the tradition of showing love by displaying acts of services and quality time has been passed down for generations and has influenced my views on love and kindness. I really admire my grandparents and parent’s relationship, and I hope to create an open and caring space for future generations as well.

Julia Kirsh

jkirsh4 — 2023-08-31 01:52:52 UTC

On both of my parents' side, my grandparents were raised in a time where only heterosexual marriages were acceptable. To them, this is what was normal, but as time progressed, their viewpoints changed as society changed. On my moms side, my grandpa’s family owned a grocery shop and all worked there together so he and his family got really close. On the other hand, my grandma did not have a good relationship with her family and felt more intimidation in the home than love. Despite this, my grandparents raised my mom and aunt in an extremely loving home where quality time was valued. Both my grandpa and grandma worked and split the responsibilities at home. My grandparents have always been a prime example of a nurturing and loving relationship. They have always valued respect for one another and everyone in around them and their relationship grew from their continuous intellectual and cultural curiosity.

On my dads side, his grandpa was the “controlling” decision maker of the house while his grandma would go to work. My dad’s grandparents rarely ever showed affection to each other–both in public and in private. Instead, they would spend a lot of quality time together and would often cook together.

Through my parents' nurturing relationship and the relationships of their parents, I was raised in a family where it was instilled in me and my sister that we should accept everyone for who they are and nurture our relationships with those around us.

Rosy Almanzar

2023-08-31 03:54:08 UTC

My grandparents and their whole generation within my family have a very traditional attitude towards most aspects of life. Seeing as they come from a tiny hispanic island and grew up under the Trujillo regime, tradition is engraved into their DNA. Although my family is a lot more blended than most, there still exist “norms” as to what is expected in terms of relationships and marriage. My mother strayed from the traditional path when it came to marriage and having kids which still causes contention within my family. She had my brother at 21 and never conformed to the idea that children equate to marriage. She definitely had a more individualized approach to marriage and knew she would only commit if she was 100% sure it wasn’t only what she should do but what she wanted to do. This idea of personal fulfillment over duty when it comes to marriage is one of the main contrast when it comes to looking at love from one generation to another within my family.

Thompson Phan

2023-08-31 05:21:35 UTC

I think growing up in an Asian household, it's pretty much established globally that parents don't really show much affection towards their children. And it's not that they don't love them, it's just tough love. Through generations, the amount of kids in each family quickly decreased. My great-grandparents had 11 kids and my grandparents had 6. With my family, my parents have maintained the stereotypical Asian household agenda. They show me love in other ways than physical and I appreciate them in the same way.

Fadi Kabi

kabi1 — 2023-08-31 06:47:19 UTC

As first generation immigrants, my parents have very traditional views when it comes to love marriage. The point of marriage was to have kids and to fulfill their religious "duties". Some people would get married because of love, but it is not as common has for the purpose of procreation. The process of getting married is very traditional, the man's the women's family and gets to know them, and if they like them they'll ask for her hand marriage. I think this creates an environment where they don't really show much affection because they didn't fall in love to get married. The way they showed affection to their kids was by providing for them and setting them up for success. Now that we have moved into the western world, a lot of the views have changed. Dating is more widely accepted, although some look down on it. I think this has lead the newly married couples to be more comfortable showing affection. When it comes to showing affection towards kids, I think western culture has influenced them into being more comfortable showing emotion towards their offspring, even though it is unusual to them.

Sage Shimabukuro

2023-08-31 07:51:02 UTC

I grew up in an extremely heteronormative environment. My mom and dad never told me that liking boys was an option. I learned about it through different forms of media, and through this I learned that being gay was a thing. So many of my friends were accepting that it gave me the confidence to tell my parents. It was hard for my parents to understand because they grew up in an environment where not many people were gay. But everything worked out and they dont care who I like.

Nicole Leihe

2023-08-31 20:41:32 UTC

The most memorable act of love that I saw in my family happened at my grandmother's funeral. My grandpa (her husband) delivered a speech outlining how they met and fell in love. He mentioned how he had been in a lower social class than her when they met. At the time, Chinese social norms typically saw women marrying into a higher social class, not the other way around. However, despite all that, my grandmother still chose to love and marry my grandpa regardless of the norms around them. As I grew up, I was never really taught to marry for any specific objective such as love or money; however, by looking throughout my family's generations, it is evident that love has been the core powerhouse of my family's marriages for many, many years. For example, my mom and dad have what I believe to be the purest form of love at the core of their marriage: they're best friends! My parents were best friends in high school, whose relationship eventually evolved throughout college to become one filled with romantic love. Throughout my childhood, they never showed much physical affection towards each other. In a world where physical affection is given so much emphasis when it comes to love, this may have seemed odd to any outsiders looking in. However, after seeing their small daily interactions for 18 years, it's evident that there is nothing but love between the two of them. They know exactly what the other is feeling at any moment -- whether they're upset, frustrated, or angry -- and how exactly to make them feel better -- whether it's through making them a cup of coffee, taking a walk with them, or just putting on a movie. I think my grandpa and grandma's love so many years ago set a tradition of defying societal stereotypes in how we love. None of my family's love stories have been "traditional", however, in some way, they are still pure and true.

Zoe Hammer

zthammer — 2023-08-31 21:06:27 UTC

Within my family, I think the values of love and marriage have remained similar throughout each generation, but the initial purpose of marriage has changed. My great-grandparents lived in Hungary in the 1940s during the Second World War and were eventually split apart and moved into concentration camps. As a result, they lost their spouses and were forced to remarry and start a new life after the war. When speaking to my grandmother about this, she told me that at the time they were forced to remarry quickly out of necessity to make a home and a family with whom they could rebuild a life for themselves. My grandmother compared her marriage to her mother’s by saying that although her parents felt deeply for each other through shared trauma and hope, they were not in love. Meanwhile, my grandparents and parents both established intimate relationships built on trust, family, and – most importantly– a deep love for each other.

Furthermore, I was raised by two dads who were the first in their families to be in a same-sex marriage. Growing up, I knew my family didn’t resemble all the other families around me, but I never understood how monumental their marriage was until they explained how complicated the process of getting married was. Not only did they have to get married multiple times because same-sex marriage was illegal in most states, but it took years for them to even feel respected by the older generations within my family. Therefore, although love has been cherished and valued in my family for years, the scope of acceptance towards different beliefs about marriage has broadened.

Chloe Christner

2023-08-31 23:31:07 UTC

Views on love have changed from one generation of my family to the next. Both of my parent's parents got divorced. My parents didn't have stable views of relationships and love because of this. My parents were never married or even engaged. They were never together in my lifetime so I didn't get to experience the dynamic of parents being in love or even being married. Both my mom and my dad had 4 kids with 3 different people. My mom got married once and got divorced once. My dad got married twice and divorced twice. Being exposed to this crazy dynamic made my views on love unstable. I didn't have healthy, loving relationships to look up to. I don't know what its like to have your parents be in love. My perception of love was formed outside the home because of this. I knew I didn't want to follow in my parents and grandparents footsteps. I want to find a soulmate, get married, and hopefully stay together forever. I want my kids to grow up with their parents married and in love. I want to learn from the generations before me and hopefully change the narrative of my family. My brother and sister are both married so hopefully our generation can be the ones that find healthy, stable relationships

2023-09-01 01:00:55 UTC

Both sides of my grandparents’ marriages ended in divorce with substance abuse, infidelity, and mental illness as some of their contributing factors. While my Dad had four brothers and his parents remained married into his adulthood, my Mom’s parents divorced when she was young. She grew up an only child and was largely independent. She often references feelings of loneliness and at times abandonment experienced as a child, as well as an intense avoidance of conflict and desire to please.

Outside of romantic love, familial love was also strained on both sides of my family. Money and property, inflamed by multiple personality and mental disorders, on my mom’s mom’s side of the family caused extreme tension. In the years leading to my grandmother’s death, she had no contact with her seven siblings. On my Dad’s side, he and his brothers had cut off communication in a more recent falling out with their father, and were not in contact upon his death, a substance related accident.

While both of my parents say that their parents loved them and I believe this to be true, their experiences show that love is not always enough for successful partnership nor parenting. These relationships affected my parent’s views on love as well as the course of their relationship.

My parents met working at a hotel restaurant in Colorado in the 90s, but they would date for over ten years prior to getting married. Their past burns with love made them hesitant to commitment. They have been married ever since. I have them to thank for my views on love and stability, importance of communication, and gift of family.

Caroline Mikes

Aadya Nijhawan

2023-09-01 02:31:14 UTC

For many ages , the concept of love remained unknown to Indian society . Marriages were merely an alliance between families to ensure political and economic stability . However, as time progressed, the mindset towards marriage saw a drastic change. During the initial years , arrange marriages were trending . My grandparents met each other through their parents' social connections and first met at my grandfather's house. They started meeting informally and finally got married after a year. Since divorce was a taboo at the time , they learnt how to live with each other and adjusted to each other's needs and wants . However , recently , love marriage has gained popularity. The change was clearly seen when my parents got married . My parents started dating in high school . They got married after 7 years . Even though they both are happy in their marriage , love marriages ironically seem to pose many problems . The expectations , adjustment issues and rise in divorce rates makes love marriages much tougher than they sound. Hence , even though love and arrange marriages are so different , they both have their own challenges and positive aspects . Just like every other relationship, a healthy balance of good and bad moments is required to build each other up and support each other through life.

Sophia Cachay

scachay2 — 2023-09-01 02:39:08 UTC

Regarding how views on love have changed in my family’s generations, I can say that the nature in which love stemmed has become more natural. My grandparents, all born in Peru, followed a traditional pattern of marrying and having children with their “first love.” Both sets of grandparents married in their early twenties and abided by the gender roles of men being the money-makers and the women remaining bound to the house, raising children, and completing house chores. Essentially, their love was fueled by this cultural and societal principle that men and women sustained different needs toward the family and they both had needs that could be met by the other partner. Despite my parents growing up with these common principles, their love was a bit different. When they met in their early thirties they were both already employed professionally. Thus, their love and marriage (in their late thirties) were not a result of meeting the needs of one another, rather it was organic.

However, something that has remained constant in generational views of love is the idea that love is the precursor of marriage. My parents married as a consequence of their love, in the same manner, that my grandparents all did the same as well.

Victoria Ortiz

vickieortiz2004 — 2023-09-01 03:32:04 UTC

As I learn about how types of love have changed throughout history, I’ve developed an understanding that relationships in prior generations were heavily focused on preserving familial values and built off of the breadwinner/homemaker ideology. A woman’s prime concern had always been the home, but this has shifted in recent years.

My family experienced the reverse effect of this generational trend. My mother grew up as the youngest daughter in a single-mother household with siblings who were 14+ years older than her. She often expresses that she barely had a childhood, as she had to grow up independently. At the age of 5, she spent multiple nights on her own because her mother would have to work nightly shifts to survive.

My mother met my father when she turned 18, and they moved to the United States. She hoped to get away from the life she lived in Uruguay and raise children that would always feel loved, nurtured, and supported. When my mother looked for a husband, she looked for someone who would be a good father. My grandmother was focused on work because she was financially insecure, and my mother focused on the home because she experienced neglect from too much focus on work.

My parents have a very healthy, loving relationship that has shaped my views on love. I always say that I can't wait to have children so that I can give them the love and support that my parents have always given me.

Katie Youn

2023-09-01 08:44:12 UTC

The concept of love, especially within marriage, has definitely changed throughout the generations of my family. My family is from South Korea which was, and still is, a very socially conservative country. Marriage was often the only way how women could obtain economic and social stability. My maternal grandmother eloped with my grandfather after she got pregnant with my mom, causing a massive scandal within their family. They stayed married up until my grandmother’s death.

It wasn’t until recently that I learned that my grandfather hadn’t stayed loyal throughout their marriage. It’s always disturbing when you learn that someone close to you did something bad. I’m not sure if my grandmother knew about his disloyalty, but ultimately I don’t think it would’ve mattered. I don’t even know if my grandmother had a job. Either way, without my grandfather, she wouldn’t have been able to support herself.

My parents are in a similar way. My mom is a stay at home mom, while my dad runs a restaurant. Their marriage is definitely based on companionship and functionality more than love. They have been friends since high school, but didn’t date until years later. My mom says that they’ve been married for as long as they have due to this prior friendship.

As for me, I’m not even sure if I want to get married. The idea of finding one person you’re supposed to love for the rest of your life is frankly terrifying, and I know most of that comes from the fact that I’m only 18. Like my mother, I do believe marriage has to have some level of companionship, but I’d like to think I’d aim for more romance.

Fin Liu

fzliu — 2023-09-01 08:53:07 UTC

Most generations of my family have been in China, where the culture is very different from America. My grandparents lived in rural parts of China, where life was simple, and families all lived together. In 1950 in China, a marriage law was passed that focused on allowing marriage to be a union of choice. My parents both immigrated to the United States, where they met in this different society with radical ideas of love and modernity. Chinese grandparents often take and raise their grandchildren for the first five years of their life, and then return the children to their parents, which often causes a rift in love between parents and their children. My parents, however, were unwilling to give their first born child to be raised in a far away country. Both sets of grandparents stuck together through their marriages, even when problems arose, but the same could not be said for my parents. In America, divorce was much more common, and their irreconcilable differences led them to terminate their marriage with two young children. Growing up in this environment, I felt distant from both parents in different ways. My examples of loving romantic relationships were found in the Disney movies I watched as a child. I find that in this generation, it’s much more acceptable to be queer, and love people outside of the binary that society often used to constrict people to. My parents and grandparents don’t necessarily understand this perspective, keeping their antiquated viewpoints and ideals of what love is.

Yasmeena Sharif

2023-09-01 17:18:23 UTC

This is a difficult question for me to answer because viewpoints on love haven't really been talked about in my family. On my mom's side of the family, my maternal grandmother passed away when my mom was eleven, and she didn't see positive, loving interactions between other members of her family who raised her. My dad grew up with his aunts, and was used to "tough love", and also didn't see what would be considered today as "healthy" love. I know that this class talks about love from a mainly romantic perspective, but I think that the way my parents were raised, and the challenges they grew up with definitely had an impact on how they chose to raise me, even though their relationship can be described as dysfunctional. I think that this is largely in part because of their childhood experiences. However, I also think that because of those experiences, my dad puts especial care into making sure I know that I am loved, and my mom does the same. I think views on love in my family are interesting, because I wished they were talked about a little more, but I also know that my grandparents and great-grandparents didn't talk about these things either. That's part of the reason why in the future, I want to break the cycle of dysfunctional relationships on both sides of my family, and try to love in a healthy way.

Falcon Fu

keyufu — 2023-09-01 18:06:46 UTC

For my family, the views on love changed a lot throughout time. I don’t know much about the story between my grandparents, but I know that they followed the traditional values a lot. In the generation of my parents, things became a little different. My parents met after they graduated from college. The main reason first drove them together was that they wanted to support each other in an unfamiliar city to both of them. My grandparents did not participate in my parents’ process of knowing each other and loving each other. As far as I know, my grandparents always supported my parents. As a result of this liberal view on love, my parents also encouraged me to pursue my own happiness and informed me that I always have their support. It is certain that they would still give me advice on decision-makings related to love, but they would never intervene too much.

For my part, ever since I left home to study abroad alone at 15 years old, I value the importance of social relationships. It would be really difficult for me to get through challenges without friendship and love, so I'm always trying to figure out how to get along in a way that makes both parties comfortable.

Leilani Mate

2023-09-01 19:33:22 UTC

I’m not quite sure how views on love have changed from my grandparents’ generation, but I certainly have a different outlook on love than my parents. They’re both immigrants, my dad from the Philippines and my mom from Eswatini. They got married after graduating college, then had me and my sister a few years later. However, I have zero recollection of any romantic interaction between them. I don’t know when their marital issues began, but I grew up without any representation of what love in a marriage looks like. Instead of being happily married, they seemed to just be cohabitating. They’ve given me no embellished details of how they met, what their wedding was like, or anything about their relationship. One would think that this lackluster representation of love would cause me to have a similar disinterest in marriage as a necessary aspect of life, but surprisingly, I grew to be a self-proclaimed “hopeless romantic,” with aspirations of getting married despite my mom’s insistence that marriage is entirely optional. I believe that my access to online media at a young age is what motivated my perspective on love and romance. I watched romantic movies and read romance books in order to substitute what my parents didn’t show me. Because my perceptions of love are shaped by fiction, I have a more idealistic view of finding “the one,” rather than accepting the potential issues I may face in marriage.

Maya Lewis

2023-09-01 19:54:11 UTC

Views on love have definitely changed, as well as circumstances on different sides of my family.

On my father's side, my grandma had two children from different men at a young age, living in Selma, Alabama, during the 1960s. She later moved to Chicago, where she met my grandpa in college, and they've been together for over 60 years. My aunt also had children very young. She has four, now grown adults, the eldest being 45 and youngest being 26. I would say her views on love were pretty similar at first, as none of her parents have the same father, but she is still single and isn’t looking to settle down.

On my mother's side, my grandma married young in Long Island, New York, and had two children. She and my grandpa met as teenagers, but they divorced after 20 years. My grandpa’s sister died in a car accident at the age of 23. 15 years after my grandparents divorced, my grandma married one of the police officers at the scene of the accident. My grandpa also remarried to his cousin’s best friend. Both marriages lasted a long time after.

My mom's upbringing in a two-parent household shaped her view of love. She never knew that people could have evil intentions or feel the need to hurt. She was very focused on her career throughout her life, so you can see how the overall love dynamic changed as years went on because she had me at 37, after meeting my father at 35. However, their relationship turned abusive, and they divorced after three years.

Throughout my life, she poured into me the concerns and red flags to look out for, so I didn’t have to go through the same thing. It has definitely made me extremely cautious of who I let close to me. My half-sister had a different experience, often depending on men for love. I, on the other hand, am cautious due to witnessing my mom's struggles. Her trauma likely influenced her limited dating experiences in the past 18 years. We have also never had a father figure in our life, which definitely affected the way we view love. However, I still want to have a long lasting, healthy relationship and marriage with the man I’m with.

Tyler Gevas

2023-09-01 20:21:24 UTC

There are many similarities and differences on the viewpoint of love in society and especially in my family. My grandparents on both sides of my family got married in their 30s. This was well above the average marriage age for men and women in the mid 1900s. They married at 30 and stayed together for the rest of their lives. I never got to know them quite well because they either died before I was born or when I was at a very young age.
I have two mothers. They knew they were gay very early in a time where it wasn’t really accepted. Backed when they were my age is was shamed on to be a homosexual. My grandparents on the other hand were very accepting of my parents. When one of my moms was a teenager, she wore a suite to a very formal dinner instead of a dress. A friend of her father made a comment to him about how she shouldn’t be like that and he socked that guy in the nose. This shows that even though it wasn’t accepted in society and even though it was something new to my grandparents, they still accepted my parents because love is love and no matter who my parents chose to be with my grandparents would love them.
This showed a lot of maturity and strength in a time like this.
My parents have been together pretty much their whole life but could not get married until 2015 when gay marriage was legalized. They married at 58. Another change in love and families was that my twin sister and I were born before our parents marriage. For we were 8 years old when we attended their marriage lol. Our parents had us very late at 50. It was a lot harder for 2 women to have a child. They also wanted to live out their lives and have a career before devoting their everything to children. They are happily married.
My family has inspired me in the aspect of love. They taught me that even if it’s unconventional to society, love who you love and go at whatever pace is best for you.

Georgia Klass

GeorgiaKlass — 2023-09-01 22:25:15 UTC

From my perspective, it seems as though my parents and both of my grandparents took a modern approach to love when selecting their spouse. My grandparents on my mom’s side chose to marry each other as a result of emotional and physical attraction rather than for reasons such as wealth, class etc. Although my grandparents on my mother’s side chose each other, there was somewhat of a parental influence. My great grandma somehow had a connection to my grandfather on my mom’s side and decided that she liked him prior to my grandparents’ first meeting. She then introduced my grandma to my grandpa which was the primary factor leading to their marriage. Conversely, my grandparents on my paternal side met without any form of parental influence. In the beginning of their relationship, my great grandparents did not like my grandpa and did not support their relationship, therefore, it was solely based on love and authentic romantic interest. Similarly to my grandparents on my father’s side, my parents met through a mutual friend and chose to get married for personal reasons with a lack of parental influence. Thus, marriage within my extended and immediate family that are still alive has been almost solely based on modern love.

Another trend that exists throughout my family’s marriages has been large age gaps and marriage at a young age. Both sets of my grandparents and my parents married very young. For example, my mom married my dad at an age of 23 while my dad was 30. This significant age gap prevented my mother from having a more traditional experience in her early adulthood years. The age dynamic in their relationship reflects love in the past. In past decades, females would marry young and dedicate their entire lives to being a mother while the husband would work and provide for the family. Although my mom did not begin to work immediately, she eventually did start her own business, breaking down outdated stereotypes that still exist in our present-day society. Therefore, this aspect of love did not necessarily change over generations, but rather over the course of my parents’ relationship.

Parker Taylor

parkerta3 — 2023-09-01 22:40:36 UTC

Through generations of my family, views on love have shifted most in regards to the values that are emphasized when it comes to choosing a partner and entering relationships. Most of my grandparents grew up in peasant, farm-tending households, and as such love and the process of joining families together was quite utilitarian in nature as they navigated attempting to build a living for themselves and work towards a more comfortable status – comfort in a financial sense and also in a sense of working towards increased amenities like electricity and running water. Thus, a union of families through something like marriage occurred strategically for both class and economic purposes. However, through my parents’ generation towards my own, I feel as if priorities in my family have shifted towards love being, rather than a means to an end, an end in and of itself. I also think that views on love within my family have shifted towards more individual decisions as well in the sense that, in my grandparents’ generation, partners could be found by the individual but decisions regarding love were holistic decisions made by both entire families. Then, for my parents, choices regarding love shifted more towards the individual level as the partners in question were slowly gaining more financial freedom to live as a partnership rather than with the entire family.

Orr Bar-Yossef

2023-09-01 23:47:12 UTC

When I observe the romantic relationships in my family—including my grandparents, parents, and siblings with their partners—it is evident to me that views on love and marriage within my family have both changed and stayed the same throughout generations.

My grandparents on my mom’s side met in Morrocco when they were in their early 20s and got married shortly after. Their marriage was very traditional in the sense that my grandpa spent the majority of his time working to provide for their family while my grandma took on raising my mom and her two siblings as well as managing the household. Growing up, I don’t recall ever seeing my grandparents express affection towards one another. Although problems arose in their marriage that indicated a lack of compatibility, they never separated due to the stigma around divorce at the time.

My grandparents on my dad’s side met in Israel when they were teenagers. They got married very young, at the age of 19. Throughout their life, they both worked and participated equally in raising their three children and managing their household. I have always admired the respect they have for one another and their appreciation of each other’s company. They both retired several years ago and now spend the majority of their time traveling the world together.

My parents' relationship is very similar in nature to that of my dad’s parents. My mom was introduced to my dad through a mutual friend when they were in their late 20s and they got married 8 months later. They both work and have always taken equal responsibility in raising me and my siblings. My parents have always set a great example of what a healthy and loving relationship is.

Overall, I believe every generation in my family has viewed love and stability as the basis for marriage. However, we have definitely evolved to be more comfortable with expressing that love through being affectionate with others. Additionally, a difference between my and my siblings’ views on marriage is that we do not feel the pressure to get married as young or as quickly as my parents and grandparents.

Miles Linde

2023-09-02 03:04:26 UTC

My views of love are definitely a lot different than my older family's, and I think that's because my views are more modern than my parents and their parents before them in terms of reflexiveness and confluence. I think the argument that a reflexive relationship is less stable is inherently a simplification of a very nuanced argument. While I believe if you applied the confluent love of today’s relationships to the political alliances and religious binds of a more conservative time those relationships would all become broken and destitute, I don't think that applies to newer relationships under this different mold. Instead of being applied to those economic ties and patriarchal relationships, the reflexivity and confluence of modern love are applied to much purer relationships. I would probably view my family's romantic and sexual relationships as more traditional in this sense, as it seems they are forced together regardless of how much they like each other and more deal with each other than negotiate their problems. This is not how the author of the reading seems to believe modern times are though, emphasizing “personal autonomy” in the means that a modern relationship is a way for each person to explore their own sexuality and romances. Instead, I would posit that modern confluent love is a giving act of allowing someone you form a deep connection with to explore their sexuality and romance, probably much differently than my parents who were, if not driven together by economic and logical factors, then by passionate ones. I found the most interesting part of the reading to be the focus on the media’s (specifically, romance novels) effect on ideas of romantic love, as well as its painting of the male romantic as un-masculine in a way, as they do not seek the same status among other men. Particularly because in so many ways modern masculinity is in my opinion viewed as indifference to how other people perceive them.

Isabella Faccio

2023-09-02 04:04:52 UTC

My grandparents on my moms side married very young and were probably not completely certain about their decision for marriage. At first, their love for each other was as passionate as any other marriage, but because their decision was made so quickly, the passion between them did not last for long. During their generation, people would marry young in order to start families and settle their lives. My grandparents' love for each other faded shortly after they were married and they divorced at a young age. My parents married during their mid twenties with more confidence in their decision. They had been seeing each other for a few years before they got married which created more stability in their relationship. They are still married to this day and have a strong, secure love for each other. During their generation, it was more common to marry for love rather than for the purposes of starting a family and securing a job. Therefore, their passion for each other was able to last longer than my grandparents, and they are still able to love each other as much as they did in the past. Overall, from my grandparents' generation to my parents', the views of love have changed because in my grandparents' generation, marriage had several practical implications rather than simply for love whereas in my parents' generation, love was more heavily valued in a relationship. I believe that in this current generation, a similar pattern will follow and love will have an even greater significance in marriage and relationships.

Sassler's (2010) article argues that one's adolescent experiences in friendships and romantic relationships affect views about relationships in emerging adulthood. Is this true in your experience, or the experience of someone you know (if you're more comfortable sharing in the third person)?

eshimada1 — 2023-09-06 05:57:47 UTC

I loved reading your responses from last week - can't wait to read more from you!

How have views on love changed + stayed the same from one generation of your family to the next?

eshimada1 — 2023-09-06 05:58:54 UTC

Bridget Wang

bmwang1 — 2023-09-06 08:27:16 UTC

I agree with Sassler’s argument; I think the relationships we cultivate in our adolescence do have a major influence on our perspective of relationships in emerging adulthood. Relationships are full of the people we care about the most. We surround ourselves with these individuals who we choose to spend time, effort, and energy on, and what they do with what we put in can teach us lessons that we possibly wouldn’t learn with any other individual. In my experience, my friendships have shaped my viewpoint of not only relationships but also the world around me. I’ve learned how to be more compassionate, how to not tolerate bad behavior from anyone, as well as what love can look like, platonically and romantically. Relationships take a lot from you, and I think that the best relationships are when you get as much as you give, and I just feel like my relationships in my adolescence have given me more wisdom to view my relationships now. In my very broad opinion, the experiences we have with the people we care about in our teenage years stick, and although I may not remember every action made, I will always remember how certain people made me feel, and those feelings often guide my decisions and behavior in life now.

Alexa Castillo

2023-09-06 10:14:14 UTC

I’m not sure if I can fully analize how views on love have changed through generations in my family because I have never payed close attention to the romantic relationships before my parents or aunts and uncles. However, I can say the idea of what love means has modernized. I would say that with older generations the desired result of a relationship was essentially marriage which is something I was able to see with my grandparents, this might still be an idea that a lot of people have because it’s what’s considered normal. For example my uncles who are a gay couple have been in a commited relationship for over a decade and (for now at least) have no intentions of getting married. I have asked them about it before the fact that they have been together for so long but not married, they said that at this point getting married would just be signing a paper. The summary of the conversation was essentially that marriage for them would really only be a ceremony and a paper that made them legally a couple, but it wouldnt necessarily change anything in their relationship since they fit the “standard” of a married couple. On the other hand, I do have aunts and uncles who are married and have had big ceremonies and everything you would deem “standard” for a couple being married in the context of process. I would say the views have changed in a way where everyone is different and want different things when it comes to a romantic relationship, so everyone can do whatever it is they feel the most comfortable with and find fitting for their relationship.

melody wu

wumelody1 — 2023-09-06 19:26:02 UTC

I agree with Sassler’s argument, adolescence is frequently the start of romantic relationships, introducing us to the worlds of intimacy, vulnerability, and affection. Whether it’s platonic or romantic love, these early love encounters shape our expectations of relationships as we enter adulthood. During our teenage years, we try to find friendships that provide laughter, a sense of belonging, emotional support, and reassurance. These friendships help us learn about love, trust, loyalty, etc, and they serve as a basis for human connections.

For me, it was the platonic relationships I’ve had over the years, that helped me grow into the person I am today. I was never really a part of big friend groups, I preferred to have a small circle of friends, I find that its easier to invest more time and energy into each relationship this way. My closest friends provided me with a sense of belonging and a strong support system, and although my closest friend moved to another country a few years ago, we still talk every day, and learn from each other every day. Genuine friendships go beyond long distance and teach us the value of trust, communication, and loyalty. I would say that the relationships I’ve built in my adolescence have given me the opportunity to be more open minded, more empathetic, and more responsible. Compared to my relationships now, nothing has really changed, I’m still looking for relationships that will broaden my perspectives by bringing new ideas, cultures, and different points of views. I hope to keep building long lasting friendships in this new environment, and I will always remember the people that stayed by my side after all these years.

Joan Song

joansong1 — 2023-09-06 22:57:38 UTC

From my experience, romantic relationships and even friendships made during adolescence indeed shape your views on future relationships. My mom would always tell me to be aware of the people I surround myself with because it is one of the biggest influences in my life. I completely agree. Through a few romantic relationships and countless friend groups, I realized what qualities of people I wanted to "hold" in my future relationship (both platonic and romantic.) Therefore, when I first meet people nowadays, I get a basic sense of whether they will remain in my life in the future.

I have seen some friends around me decide they do not want marriage after relationship traumas and heartbreaks, and that is how they form their views. Some friends are very outgoing and extroverted, so they want to pursue many relationships without strings attached. Personally, the more I interact and form relationships with people, the more I want a stable, committed relationship with a partner and small friend group circles. I believe that is because I've mostly been forming reserved, deep-connected relationships, and I still seek those qualities in adulthood.

Julia Kirsh

jkirsh4 — 2023-09-07 00:20:55 UTC

In my personal opinion, I agree with Sassler’s argument. Although Sassler did mention many different points about parents in relationships, she never really mentioned how a healthy parenting relationship has an effect on their children’s relationships. Sassler wrote about how divorce can affect the relationships of that individual, but she never spoke about the children themselves. For me, my parents have a nurturing relationship, but don’t show a lot of physical affection towards one another, instead, they communicate with one another in both a non-romantic and romantic manner. With me and my boyfriend of four years, I can see a lot of similarities between my parents and us, which I think has a lot to do with my unconscious observations of my parents. Both of us do not feel the need to show a lot of public affection, instead, we prefer to have more meaningful conversations and healthy communication, just like my parents. On the other hand, some friends I know who come from rough family situations typically get into relationships that end up hurting them. They want someone that they have lacked, so they go to look for it in a partner. At the end of the day, they have a hard time leaving that relationship when things start to go downhill because even though there may be many things wrong with that relationship, they are still receiving that affection or validation from someone that they don’t receive elsewhere.

Thomas Bittencourt

tbittenc — 2023-09-07 04:14:09 UTC

Yeah! I feel like the friendships and romantic relationships we experience in adolescence are the next greatest determining factor for our views about relationships in emerging adulthood, after the influence of our parents. Adolescence relationships are less serious, typically shorter term, and allow individuals to develop some views on what a relationship should look like later on in life. In my experience, I developed such views as the importance of putting equal effort into the relationship, the necessity of communication and vulnerability, and how remaining an independent person is crucial. If a couple were too attached in adolescence, it’s more likely that those individuals will be more aware of how much time they dedicate to a significant other over friends, school, extracurriculars, etc. I would also assume that someone who only had negative experiences in adolescent relationships would remain rather pessimistic about the idea of relationships in early adulthood — though that’s just a guess. These relationships we have earlier in life help define what traits or qualities in a person we value most, and whom we decide to spend more time with and grow closer to. Even when speaking strictly about friendships, I feel that I have a smaller circle of close friends because of how reserved I was throughout most of middle school and early high school.

Aadya Nijhawan

2023-09-07 08:40:03 UTC

I completely agree with Sassler’s view. Adolescent experiences in friendships and romantic relationships play a key role in developing one's views about relationships in emerging adulthood. I believe that adolescent relationships are usually short termed and casual. These relationships create the expectations of the adolescent and determine what they will seek in their future relationships.

In my personal experience, my parents dated through high school and got married after 9 years. Even after having children, their expression of love for each other never changed. From subtle gestures like always bringing a rose when one of them is feeling dull to big gestures like surprising each other with a holiday, my parents have never left an opportunity to make each other smile. Growing up seeing them, in my own relationships, I seek communication, effort and loyalty. I believe that love is a two way street and look forward to having long term committed relationships.

Contrary to this, my best friend whose parents got divorced when she was a toddler, only wants to indulge in short term relationships, with no commitment and expectations. She does not believe in the idea of love and wants only temporary attachment.

Chloe Christner

cchristn — 2023-09-07 18:01:25 UTC

I agree with Sassler's argument. I think relational experiences in adolescence effects views of relationships in emerging adulthood. Trauma resulting in attachment issues and the relationship your parents have with each other and with you also play a big part. Like we talked about last week, if you are exposed to only toxic, unstable relationships, your views on what a relationship is supposed to look like might be skewed. You might put up with an unhealthy relationship because you think that is what a relationship is supposed to look like. Relationships with parents leads to your attachment style which then leads to your views and tendencies in relationships. If your parents didn't show you the care you needed as a child, you are likely to end up with an avoidant attachment style. In your relationships, you will be likely to avoid commitment and letting people in. If your parents were abusive to you, you might be more likely to stay with an abusive partner. I personally think the relationship we have with our parents plays the biggest factor in our relationships later on in life. In my own experiences, I havent had a relationship so maybe the lack of experience will affect my views of relationships later. As for friendships, I have grown up with a great group of friends so going into college and emerging adulthood, I know what to look for and stay away from. Overall, I agree with Sassler's claim.

Rosy Almanzar

2023-09-07 21:14:13 UTC

I completely agree with Sassler's argument, that our experiences with friendships and romantic relationships in adolescence affect our views about relationships in emerging adulthood. Not only do our own relationship experiences shape our future experience but also the relationships that exist around us. The relationships that were portrayed around you and interacted with you as you grew up had a large impact on shaping your own expectations from relationships. Kids can either idealize and fantasize about having a relationship like their parents. Or children see the relationships their parents were in and that becomes their antithesis of love. I believe that the relationship between the people who raise us through our adolescence are the most important when it comes to indications of future relationships. These relationships set the tone as to how we communicate, our love languages, qualities we search for in other people, etc.

Fadi Kabi

kabi1 — 2023-09-08 03:38:10 UTC

I would agree with Sassler's argument. The experiences we cultivate in our adolescence and young adulthood definitely influence all of our relationships. Based on previous experiences we have a certain viewpoints on certain people. We may be more cautious if we are scarred or more open if we have good experiences with friendships. When it comes to friends, I hold people to a high standard because of the quality of my current friends, they are not easily replaceable in my eyes. In this case my previous experiences with friends changes the things I look for when it comes to making new friends. This can also be romantic in some aspects to. I think growing up, looking at how your parents acted toward each other, influences what you value in a romantic relationship. But on the other hand, you will definitely learn to be more mature from romantic relationships as you get older. Relationships when you are super young are immature and not what real relationships look like.

Sophia Cachay

scachay2 — 2023-09-08 03:42:08 UTC

I believe Sassler’s argument is very true, and it can go both ways, specifically about experience or lack of experience. Regarding friendships, I can happily say my experience of friendships has been very positive, as my upbringing allowed me to develop strong friendships and foster loving relationships that keep me in contact with them. As I enter emerging adulthood, I carry these positive experiences of my childhood friends to find new friends in my new eras of life, such as college. Concerning romantic relationships, I believe the same can be said; adolescent experiences in romantic relationships frame the views and expectations of those in emerging adulthood. For instance, my best friend had unpleasant romantic relationships in her adolescence that caused her to harbor a cautious and weary perspective on these types of relationships. Thus, this argument that her previous relationship influenced her view as a now 19-year-old, who is in the emerging adulthood phase, holds true. Reversely, I personally don’t have experience in romantic relationships, so I think that the lack of experience leaves me very curious and confused when it comes to approaching and exploring romantic relationships.

Zoe Hammer

zthammer — 2023-09-08 04:32:32 UTC

I agree with Sassler’s argument and think that one’s experience in friendships and romantic relationships in their youth can greatly impact their views about relationships later in life. Relationship are a primary source of a person’s unique identity and they help establish our values as we meet and grow up around different people. Therefore, the relationships that persist from different social exchanges can have significant impacts on the way adults interact with new people. For example, if someone has a very positive long-term relationship in high school, they may learn valuable lessons about loyalty, honesty, and commitment and as a result, develop the skills needed to establish a healthy relationship in their emerging adulthood. In contrast, an individual who experiences infidelity or a toxic friendship in their adolescence may be hesitant to trust the new people they meet in their adulthood. Additionally, individual trauma from heartbreak (whether romantic or platonic) can greatly stunt a young adults ability to re-enter the dating world or make new friends. In my experience, I have made lasting friendships and formed bonds with people who have showed me how to be empathetic and take accountability when I make a mistake. As a result, I believe I have become a better friend and am more confident in my abilities to establish connections with new people.

Fin Liu

fzliu — 2023-09-08 04:44:02 UTC

I would agree with Sassler in this idea because of my personal experiences. Both positive and negative experiences among people have great effects on people and stick with them for the rest of their lives. Because of positive experiences within the queer community when younger, I now tend to stick with other members of the LGBTQ+ community. I find that my adolescent experiences have greatly affected the way that I view current relationships and potential friendships and relationships with others. I’ve been figuring myself out throughout my adolescence and emerging adulthood, especially regarding my sexuality and what I want out of relationships. In high school I dated a man, and when I came out to him as pansexual, he said that it was “hot” and that we should “have a threesome”. Feeling completely put off by that, it led to a deep mistrust and fear of men for a long time. Other times in relationships, people have really only wanted physical intimacy, and that’s something that has stuck with me. I will often assume that it’s the main thing that people want from me, so sometimes I am pleasantly surprised when people actually want to get to know me and have conversations with me instead of physical affection. I am often cautious of men and people who remind me of nasty past situations.

Nicole Leihe

2023-09-08 06:27:59 UTC

I wholeheartedly agree with Sassler's argument that our adolescent relationships have a big impact on our relationships going into adulthood. In my experience, the values we see in both romantic relationships and friendships during our adolescence are ones that we carry into our adult relationships - which can either be detrimental or positive. Some people can bring trust and communication into their adult relationships, while others may bring trends of infidelity or unhealthy attachment. Additionally, if people have continuously bad experiences in relationships during their teen years, they may think that to be normal and allow themselves to be treated poorly in their adult relationships - in both friendships and romantic relationship. On the other hand, a lack of experience in relationships as a whole can cause uncertainty going into adult relationships. If someone had limited friendships or romantic relationships in their adolescence, they may shy away from meaningful relationships in fear of being too inexperienced. Because many adolescents usually take their teen years to figure out what they would and wouldn't like to see in their relationships, those with limited experiences may also be more likely to enter into unhealthy relationships in their adulthood, as they may not have set concrete personal limits for their relationships. In my experience, I tend to be hesitant towards entering romantic relationships as a result of both limited experience and the relationships I see around me during my adolescence. Horror stories of my friends' relationships and experiences have given me the space to be more selective in thinking about the things I want in my relationships - I feel like I'm more picky when it comes to prospective relationships.

Victoria Ortiz

vickieortiz2004 — 2023-09-08 06:45:38 UTC

In my personal experience, I believe that my parents have shaped my goals, expectations, and values the most when it comes to love. My parents have a relationship that society would often label the “ideal relationship.” They moved to another country together, got married in their early 20’s, had two daughters, and have fostered a respectful, loving, compassionate relationship throughout the 20 years that they have been married. They have not only influenced my familial values, but they have impacted what I look for in a partner, and have made me crave the idea of being in a companionate, loving relationship.

I am currently in a long distance relationship with my boyfriend who represents all the qualities that my parents have set forth as an example for me. He consistently respects me, values me, and supports me. Experiencing such a healthy relationship at a young age has set a precedent for what I expect and hope to have throughout the course of my life. Many of my friends experienced toxic relationships that have made them develop trust and commitment issues during their adolescence, which will probably transfer over to their emerging adulthood. However, I hope that as they mature and are introduced to a larger dating pool outside of high school, they will experience healthier relationships that shift their perspectives on love and dating.

I am very grateful for my experiences and external factors that have impacted how I view love. I do not foresee my views changing as I transition to adulthood and hope to maintain a fulfilling relationship that I can then introduce to my children.

Kasandra Santiago

kasandra17 — 2023-09-08 15:37:04 UTC

I think this is true. I can say that personally my experiences in friendships and romantic relationships in my adolescent phase have affected my views in my emerging adulthood. In respect to my romantic relationships I can say that my mom always told me to find someone who values me and treats me with the respect I deserve, which lead me to find someone who I knows values me and who I have grown together with for three years now, and this relationships which started in my adolescence phase and is now moving along with me to my emerging adulthood has taught me that love has its ups and downs but that communication really is key, and that you need to be able to take constructive criticism and grow from it to only make connections stronger, and these lessons will stay with me throughout my emerging adulthood shaping my views and continuing to guide me to have the romantic relationship I deserve. With respect to friendships I can say through the failed friendships that I had in my adolescence I learned that not everyone is meant to stay which is a lesson that affects my views in my emerging adulthood because I know to not take everyone seriously because some people aren't meant to be in your life and that is fine. Overall, I truly believe that the experiences faced and lessons learned in relationships and friendships in my adolescence have and will continue to impact my relationships in my emerging adulthood as they are valuable to me because those lessons have helped me grow and helped me maintain only those who do me good in my life.

Falcon Fu

keyufu — 2023-09-08 17:30:45 UTC

I think it is true. In my own case, my current and possibly future beliefs on romantic relationship and friendship are greatly influenced by my adolescent experience. When I was in middle school, I did not spend much time as other classmates on the textbooks. At that time, I already made the decision to study aboard so I spent most of my time on learning English and prepared for the high school applications. For almost a year, I did not go to school. As a result, I only remained contacts with few close friends from my class and gradually distanced myself from the others. Later in high school, I also made some new friends and remained close relationship with some of them. This experience made me less interested in social events and preferred more on events that are held within my friend group. Today, I started to attend some of the social events and met more people than I used to do, but intrinsically, my belief on friendship is almost settled.

As to romantic relationship, I am kind of cautious on my interactions and decisions. I rather have a relationship that we can understand and support each other than only enjoying the happiness. In a certain way, this belief on romantic relationship is also influenced by my adolescent experience.

Leilani Mate

lmate4 — 2023-09-08 17:58:35 UTC

I agree with the argument that adolescent experiences in friendships and romantic relationships affect views about relationships in emerging adulthood. In my experience, the small group of close friends I met in middle school and stayed with throughout high school has heavily influenced almost every aspect of my life, including how I view relationships, both platonic and romantic. Thanks to the positive experience I had with my childhood friends, now that I’m in college, I look for those same attributes in forming friendships here. I steer clear of people I feel won’t provide the same sense of belonging and comfort that my hometown friendships did. When I meet new people, I find myself comparing them to people from my adolescence because those years were so formative and influential to me. I believe that the same is true regarding romantic experiences in adolescence. Personally, my lack of romantic encounters in adolescence has influenced me to be more cautious about starting romantic relationships now. On the other hand, someone who's had a lot of romantic encounters in their adolescence will also be influenced by that experience in their emerging adulthood. If they had a negative or traumatic experience, that could cause them to shy away from romance in their emerging adulthood, while if they had a positive experience, they could feel inclined to continue to seek out romantic relationships.

Yasmeena Sharif

2023-09-08 18:13:52 UTC

I do think that one's adolescent experiences in romantic relationships and friendships can affect views about relationships in emerging adulthood. Personally, I think that we as people, are a combination of all of the people we've interacted with during our lives. Sometimes I incorporate phrases or gestures from my friends or my parents into my own vernacular, and may not even realize it. I do think my viewpoint on romantic experiences has been greatly affected by some of the relationships I've had -- to the point where I no longer want a romantic relationship, because I'd just prefer to go without one. I think that our experiences shape our viewpoints, when we have negative interactions with people, it can change whether or not we want to have similar experiences or interactions with other people, regardless of if we know how those new people will react. I also think that whether we have positive friendships and examples of what friendships can look like or not, can also shape the kinds of friendships and people we look to have relationships with in the future.

jadagrif — 2023-09-08 19:18:09 UTC

I fully agree with Sassler’s commentary on adolescent experiences in friendships and romantic relationships affecting views on relationships in emerging adulthood. In my early years, I was fortunate enough to develop a close community of friends, through natural and unforced relationships. Throughout middle and high school, my friends and I were primarily focused on school, extracurriculars and other activities which is how I was able to create these friendships in the first place. This formulation was my standard when I gave thought to what relationship I would want and what I would want in a partner. Therefore, as I was transitioning into adulthood, I found myself seeking a similar deep connection as I had with my friends to a romantic partner. I entered my first romantic relationship at 17, and it unfolded organically much like how my friendships did. I would to some extent say the parallel between friendships and relationships definitely exists or at least influences one another. Based on my friendships I ended up longing for a relationship where the basis is friendship.

However, like Sassler discussed, as years progress people are getting married later in life. This trend as shown by the studies she provides shows that young adults have had more romantic partners throughout their life before they finally settled down. I think this is key in my life because since I never gave much thought to romantic relationships, I only knew I wanted something similar to my friendships but in a romantic form and because of that it wasn’t sustainable. That being said, I gained insight on myself and what I would want in the future. I think that our experiences overall shape our perspectives on what we seek in our future relationships, the kind of person we wish to share our lives with, and the approach we take in pursuing it. Through my introspective process, I have come to appreciate how my past experiences profoundly influence the choices I make in the realm of romantic relationships and ultimately pave the way for a more meaningful and fulfilling future that aligns with what I want upon learning from past experiences.

Thompson Phan

thompsonphan — 2023-09-08 21:20:13 UTC

In my experience, adolescent experiences in friendships and romantic relationships do affect our views about relationships. It’s easy to be influenced by those who’ve surrounded you growing up because their opinions and values also start to become yours. The attachment theory suggests that our early experiences with caregivers and later experiences in close relationships shape our attachment styles. Adolescence is a critical time for developing these styles. But they can also open your mind and help you grow and establish your own opinions and values. Adolescent experiences in romantic relationships though can alter how we view relationships when we’re older. We can begin to expect that “one true love” and magical fairytale story and soon be disappointed when it’s much more than that. Over the years, I’ve had good friends who’ve supported me in my decisions and given me the best advice to help me blossom in my platonic/romantic relationships.

Dor Peretz

peretzdor1 — 2023-09-08 21:42:52 UTC

I would agree that one’s adolescent experiences in friendships and romantic relationships affect views about relationships in emerging adulthood. As an emerging adult now in college, I can most definitely say that the connections I made in high school and how they worked out taught me a lot about what I look for in friendships and relationships, knowledge which I use now in determining who to surround myself with in my life, and how to go about developing these relationships. For instance, I had a close friend in high school who was very toxic and would constantly prioritize attention from guys no matter how it affected her friends (such as me), and that ended up leading to really uncomfortable and unhealthy circumstances between me and her. Since that friendship breakup, I definitely watch out for similar behavior like that in potential friends and stop being friends with someone earlier on than I did back then if I see them exhibiting those traits that were hurtful to me. I was never in a serious committed relationship throughout high school so I can’t speak definitively about how those romantic relationships would affect early adulthood. Although I would venture to say that similar to the situation with the friend, from all the romantic situationships that haven’t worked out for me I learned what behaviors in potential partners to watch out for and also gained more clarity in what I do want and look for in a relationship.

Caroline Mikes

2023-09-08 21:45:40 UTC

I do agree with Sassler’s argument. I think the experiences we have with relationships, whether it be romantic or platonic, deeply shape the way in which we experience love. Meaningful friendships have taught me what it really means to love unconditionally and to feel loved unconditionally. I had a close friend that once told me I wish my boyfriend loved me and showed me that love in the way you do for your girlfriend. I agreed that I wished the same from my relationship. We had similar expressions of love and affection, and both considered ourselves highly emotional and affectionate people while our partners despite being good people were simply different in the way they gave and received love. Friends like these, who have written me letters of love, given me gifts “just because”, been there for every emotion, and constantly cherished and appreciated me through their words and actions have taught me what I want and deserve out of romantic relationships. I like to think I’ve done the same. I’m so lucky to have friends that are thoughtful, kind, and make me feel good about myself and worthy of that love. I accept no less out of my close friendships and have always been someone that has chosen their closest friends carefully. It has taken time, but I am learning to realize I should not settle for less in romantic relationships either. It’s hard and painful but it is growth and I have my friends to thank for these early steps.

Hannah Poulter

hpoulter2 — 2023-09-08 21:59:51 UTC

I agree with Sassler’s argument that adolescent experiences in relationships have a monumental impact on our views on relationships in emerging adulthood. When we are younger and forming romantic and platonic relationships with our peers, we learn many ‘lessons’ about what we like and dislike in regards to intimacy, self-disclose, and other aspects of a typical relationship. These lessons are continually learned as we grow up and, hence, continually nurture our mental framework and expectations of what we want our relationships to look like. From my personal experience, I formed relationships with friends in my adolescence which have, for the most part, stood the test of time and so I have a good understanding of what I perceive to be good qualities that I actively seek in a person when getting to know them. This has translated into my romantic relationships too, developing my view of what I want them to resemble. I believe that these experiences may not always be encountered firsthand either. I have friends whose parents have separated or who have never been in a committed relationship with each other and this, in turn, has affected how they view relationships. For example, due to how they perceive their parents' relationship, they may have little desire to begin a relationship with another person out of a desire to avoid a similar experience with a partner.

Georgia Klass

GeorgiaKlass — 2023-09-08 22:18:01 UTC

I agree with Sassler’s (2010) claim that “one’s adolescent experiences in friendships and romantic relationships affect views about relationships in emerging adulthood.” Individuals learn from past experiences and apply their new knowledge to future experiences which then help to shape our overarching views of romance and relationships. Moreover, our memories also help us to determine how we will behave towards others. Therefore, if I had loyal, respectful, and comforting friendships in the past, I would likely be more comfortable making friends and find it easier to put my trust in others. Contrarily, if I had bad experiences with friendships in the past, I might shy away from making new friends and have a hard time trusting others. Similarly, if I was in a bad romantic relationship in the past where I felt as though I was treated poorly, I would struggle to become romantically involved with new individuals.

In my recent years I have had good experiences with making friends and forming relationships. I have felt that I have been treated with respect and kindness, thus allowing me to view other individuals in a positive way. In the past, I have had very durable friendships and trustworthy relationships; therefore, I am able to easily trust new people that come into my life.

I do believe that individuals can form views on relationships in emerging adulthood that do not resemble their adolescent experiences in friendships and relationships. It often depends on what the individual experienced in the past friendships/relationships. For example, if an individual was in an abusive relationship, it might affect them to a greater extent than someone who was broken up with. Therefore, it may be harder for the individual who was in a formerly abusive relationship to be able to develop a more positive view on relationships.

Tyler Gevas

2023-09-08 22:36:44 UTC

I agree with Sassler’s argument that your experiences with relationships whether platonic or romantic in your childhood affect your views on relationship when you are an adult. As I child, my mother would always tell me to surround myself with people who I wanted to be like. I found this piece of advice would be very beneficial for my closest relationships are with the people who inspired me everyday. I also realized that you naturally gravitate towards people that are like you, sometimes it’s not always in the good ways.
I will say that over the past year the friendships, and relationship that I made completely changed my life. My friends inspired me to be adventurous and try new things. Things that I may have never done if it wasn’t for them. In a time of growing into your skin and finding out who you are, they played a major part in my discovery of who I really am and who ّI want to become.
My romantic relationship completely changed my life. My girlfriend helped me look at life differently and appreciate the little things. My girlfriend and me are very similar yet still learning new things from one another. She along side most of my friends have taught me what I look for in friendships and relationships. I am still growing though. Still changing. So although I have a clear picture of what I want in a relationship with a human being, that idea is still changing and will continue to change for the rest of my life.

Parker Taylor

parkerta3 — 2023-09-08 22:40:57 UTC

I definitely agree with Sassler’s view that one’s adolescent experiences in friendships and romantic relationships affect views about relationships in emerging adulthood. In my experience, the interpersonal relationships that one has throughout their adolescent years, regardless of whether they are platonic or romantic, are an integral part of the formation of their identities and thus what they seek out of interpersonal relationships later on in emerging adulthood. For me, many of the positive aspects of connections I’ve made throughout adolescence are things tied very closely to my current values now, and in the same way many of the pitfalls of friendships through adolescence also have informed aspects of an interpersonal connection that I would want to avoid as well. During the last couple years of high school, for example, certain social phenomena led towards an increase in my awareness of what I did not want in interpersonal relationships as I moved forward. My school was a very small K-12 establishment and my graduating class only had 80 people, and having to be around the same small group of people for that long carried with it some benefits as we all were able to form relationships with one another, but it also proved to have insidious harmful aspects as well becoming apparent in our last couple years which I found quite interesting. Watching friend groups crumble towards the end of high school as the escape of university was becoming tangible was certainly an illuminating experience for me as it allowed me to look back upon social connections and retrospectively piece together warning signs. This informs my process now of ensuring that the interpersonal relationships I engage in, as I now have much more freedom of choice in such a large school environment, are more primed to be long-lasting and not simply circumstantial.

Michael Blasi

mblasi5 — 2023-09-08 23:12:28 UTC

I agree with Sassler's argument that the way we view and treat friendships and romantic relationships changes as adolescents change the way we approach the outcomes of romantic relationships when we enter adulthood. As someone who has always had a friend group made of extroverts, I feel that they have significantly influenced the way I behave and search for a romantic partnership. You see, because I surround myself with these people, I tend to find myself more attracted to a partner who embodies the traits of an extrovert than an introvert. Therefore, when I find myself going on a romantic date with another, I feel that a natural spark will far more likely initiate if my partner contains these traits. While this is just one example of Sassler’s argument being applied to my love life, I feel that it still stands to show how the people we surround ourselves with significantly modify our dating pool and the people that we find attractive. Perhaps if my primary friend group was extremely introverted I would have a completely different way of who I find attractive; however, this is not the case because, at the end of the day, those we surround ourselves with tend to influence the way we approach all walks of life, and by me surrounding myself with extroverts, I have become naturally more attracted to such people.

Miles Linde

2023-09-08 23:19:01 UTC

I feel as if it is much more true of my friendships than my prior romantic relationships, unless you consider my current romantic relationship as it technically started during adolescence rather than emerging adulthood. Before my current relationship I was extremely unforgiving of any flaws I found in the other person, typically because it was within the first week or so forgoing a romantic connection, and so I quickly ended things and never pursued much with anyone for very long. However, in my current relationship which embodies my feelings on how I wish for a relationship to be, I definitely consider my girlfriend to be my best friend and treat her in many respects in a similar manner to how I treat my friends. I probably treat her kinder than I would any other friend because of this, but there is certainly a level of understanding and humor between us that mimics what I had found in platonic friendships before I found her. That being said, there are definitely ideas I percieve as flaws that I'm completely okay in finding in friends (insensitivity to certain things, differing values), that I would not be nearly as willing to accept if I were to have the same conversations with my girlfriend, as while we'd certainly be able to talk things out and remain friends I would not want to share the rest of my life with someone with whom my opinions vary on important subjects in the same way I'm willing to accept those in friends.

Alexa Castillo

2023-09-08 23:32:08 UTC

I agree with the argument that these formative experiences can shape our attachment style, communication skills, and expectations in relationships. The friendships and romantic relationships we have during our teenage years serve as a foundation for understanding intimacy, trust, and dynamics. Positive and negative experiences in these relationships can influence our ability to form and maintain healthy relationships once we grow into adulthood. These expiriences can vary from person to person, depending on their specific experiences and how they interpret and learn from them. No experience is the same which is also why i think some have a hard time understanding “toxic relationships” and why one should never form an idea based on the surface of a relationship because almost everytime there is more to it. Habits we learn during our formative years are hard to unlearn as you keep growing which is why someone may have successful relationships while the other person might not. This isnt specifically talking about romantic relationships, friendships can also have a lasting impact on your perception of relationships. The behaviors we experience and learn in friendships can influence how we approach future romantic relationships but also our ability to build and maintain meaningful friendships throughout their life. I have grown on the idea of “people will come and go” and “nothing really lasts forever” which might not be the best ideas to have, however, i know they come from patterns ive experienced in past relationships and friendships.

Orr Bar-Yossef

baryosse — 2023-09-08 23:51:09 UTC

From my personal experiences and from what I have observed from those around me, I definitely agree with Sassler’s argument that adolescent experiences in friendships and romantic relationships affect views about relationships in emerging adulthood. Growing up, I was raised by my parents to be mindful of the people I choose to be around. My parents taught me to value mutual respect and trust in both my friendships and relationships, which is definitely something I still value today as I am transitioning into adulthood. Having my parents to look up to in terms of their relationship with each other has also guided me throughout my high school years in what I looked for in my own relationships. Every friendship and relationship I experience further shapes and reinforces the qualities I look for both in the friends I choose to spend my time with and in romantic partners. When I have had negative experiences with certain people in the past, it taught me to stay away from people with similar qualities in order to avoid repeating that negative relationship again in the future. Vise versa, when I experience a positive relationship with a person, I learn to seek their qualities in the people I build connections with. This means every friendship or relationship I have experienced has shaped my view on the connections I make now in one way or another, regardless if it was a good or bad experience. The connections I have built through my adolescence continue to have a tremendous impact on the person I am today—including my values, my interests, and my perspectives.

Isabella Faccio

ifaccio — 2023-09-09 00:47:34 UTC

I believe it is true that one's adolescent experiences in friendships and romantic relationships affect their views on relationships emerging in adulthood. During one's adolescence, they are able to experiment and explore what they like and dislike in a potential partner. In my personal experience, with every romantic and platonic relationship I have been in, I have learned immensely about myself and have curated my specific taste in people I pursue. In my adolescence, I have also been able to explore my sexuality which I believe has greatly impacted my view on romantic relationships as I continue to grow. In addition, the meaningful platonic relationships that I've had have shown me a standard that I believe I deserve in romantic relationships.
When meeting people now, I am able to quickly discern whether or not I picture them in my life and whether or not they create would make a meaningful impact in my life. Even more than views on relationships emerging in adulthood, I believe that adolescent experiences in friendships and relationships reveal more about one's character and personality, which I consider more important. Understanding more about myself through my adolescent relationships has been more important to me than understanding what I want in a future romantic relationship.

Maya Lewis

2023-09-09 03:17:26 UTC

I agree with the argument that adolescent experiences in friendships and romantic relationships impact one's views about relationships in emerging adulthood. One of the main examples I can give is in my platonic relationships. In elementary school, I had one main best friend that I did everything with. You wouldn't see one without the other. I think this has influenced a lot of my friendships in recent years, and because I grew up having one main best friend, I know I will always desire having that.

In high school, I became friends with my best friend now, and I feel I became dependent on her because I have been so comfortable with having a main best friend rather than having a group with people I'm equally as close to. To this day, people ask where the other is because we are never separated. Most girls in our friend group have different people to go to for their problems, but we only go to each other. I know we will never separate in the future, so being in different states has been challenging. Even with this, I think no matter what, I will always search to be super close with one main person no matter where I am.

Sage Shimabukuro

2023-09-11 00:04:15 UTC

I think that it is very true, that the relationships that we have during our adolescence shape our view of relationships as we transition to emerging adults. First, the friendships we make during this time can greatly change our perspective and alter the way we see the world. For so long I believed that the way my parents lived was the way I was accepted to live life however, it is through my friends I realized that I don't need to believe the same things. It is during this time we start to learn to form our opinions on the world that may differ from our parents. In addition to this during our adolescence, we have the chance to experiment and figure out what we like and what we don't like. These likes and dislikes that we form in our adolescence will greatly impact who we choose to be with as we potentially start to look for a long-term partner. For example, one of my first relationships was with a girl, and it didn't work out. Later in highschool, I tried dating a guy and everything clicked for me, that I might be gay. It is through this experimental period of our lives we really get to figure out who we are and who we want to be.

In class, we've learned about how racial and socioeconomic (aka class) inequality are closely intertwined. Do you think socioeconomic inequality will decrease as interracial marriage increases? Do you think some other pattern will emerge? Explain using any examples from the world around you (ex. the media, social media, your own personal experiences, experiences of those you've seen around you)

eshimada1 — 2023-09-11 20:01:11 UTC

Dor Peretz

peretzdor1 — 2023-09-13 04:42:18 UTC

I think that socioeconomic inequality will decrease as interracial marriage increases because many socioeconomic inequalities occur due to systemic racism such people of color receiving lower rages, enviromental racism, and the ongoing afteracts of previous laws that disproportionately benefitted certain communities, like the housing acts we learned about in class. Because race is such a big factor of socioeconomic class, as more mixed marriages occur, we would also see more couples marrying between different social classes, wherein the person in the relationship who is more “privledged” could support the other partner and their family, spreading the better infrastructure and unique opportunities they had access to towards more people, especially as these couples raise kids who also interact with the world. While this isn’t an example specific to race, the idea of marriage between social classes to help “raise up” the person of the lower class has been prominent for a long time, and was especially significant in the regency era as can be seen through both historical documents and literary works like Pride and Prejudice and Little Women. Women of that time had less power and opportunities as a whole gender (compared to men), especially if they were of lower class, but they received benefits from marrying into a higher social class, and over time as women earned more power they were able to fight more for equality. I think this pattern could apply to race-related socioeconomics as well with interracial marriages helping the minority races’ fight for equality.

Jada Griffiths

jadagrif — 2023-09-13 05:36:40 UTC

Interracial marriage can help mend the large gap between people suffering from socioeconomic inequality to an extent. Therefore, socioeconomic inequality will decrease as interracial marriages increase. Interracial marriages promote social integration and assist in mending the vast barriers of inequality on all fronts. These unions offer a gateway to heightened understanding, cultural awareness, and the pursuit of further educational achievements. Thus, creating a world that stands less tainted by racial ignorance and class distinctions. Furthermore, it breaks the barriers and produces more equitable opportunities for all. A fitting example would be the movie ‘A Bronx Tale’. The interracial relationship in the movie is important because it serves as a central plot point that explores racial tension and the impact of love in a racially divided community. The movie strips apart the stereotypes placed on race and accepts people for who they are; which can indirectly address socioeconomic inequality by challenging discriminatory norms. Leading to a more educated, accepting society and promoting diversity and inclusion. In most films like this one, this representation can lead to a more equitable society where socioeconomic opportunities are not limited by race. However, it should be acknowledged that interracial couples face discrimination and bias which is often very hateful and seen as a negative. However, this can lead to increased awareness of systemic inequalities. This then transpires in people fighting back and influencing the development of policies and practices that promote equal opportunities and reduce discrimination. Which overall has an impact on socioeconomic inequality and gradually leveling the playing field for all people.

Thompson Phan

thompsonphan — 2023-09-13 15:13:21 UTC

I think socioeconomic inequality will actually increase as interracial marriages increase because people will set their standards higher than average. There are many people who already will only marry to money or expect their partner to make at least six figures and that will only continue to rise. Especially with social media, people envy luxurious things and will seek any way to attain them. Which the easiest way is marrying rich.

Joan Song

joansong1 — 2023-09-13 17:41:22 UTC

As interracial marriages increase, many people would expect that racism would decrease (because of the "shown" aspects of marriage), therefore socioeconomic inequality would also decrease. Although that might be some of the cases, I expect the trend of socioeconomic inequality would stay similar based on what I've seen around me. Realistically, I think "marriage," whether it is within the same race or with a different race, happens largely based on the spouse's income, education, and prestige. Some of my acquaintances who are currently dating partners with different racial backgrounds still hold racial stereotypes to a certain extent, and I believe it will carry on until marriage especially since marriage involves financial aspects. If people were to marry with minimum consideration of their "income, education, and prestige," people with partners that are racially and socioeconomically advantaged might be impacted and supported regarding residency, status, and many other things, and it would occur otherwise as well. Surely, there would be some breaks in the barriers among different races and socioeconomic classes by couples emotionally connecting and legally getting married which would tinker society's perception of inequality. However, I think that an increase of interracial marriages overall would not necessarily increase or decrease racial and socioeconomic inequality.

Mika Higashi

2023-09-13 20:18:51 UTC

This is more of a difficult one! I think that there will be a substantial amount of reform if the level of interracial marriages increase. I do think that inequality will decrease as more interracial marriages occur - a large part of inequality is the access to resources and general quality of life that different people are allotted. If we have situations where marriages might be supported by variations in exposure to society, more people will have access to resources through their partner. Eventually, this may become widespread and create socioeconomic integration. I think that the portraits of interracial marriages in advertisements contribute particularly to the social perception of a family - this is one way that the media positively supports relationships and marriages between different social classes alike. By setting an image in viewers’ and peers’ minds, they are sending a subliminal message that these things are common, naturally occurring, and permitted in the social context. I find it difficult to articulate in two aspects; firstly, my general knowledge and comprehension of the topic, and secondly, my ability to speak in a politically correct tone.

Bridget Wang

bmwang1 — 2023-09-13 21:53:08 UTC

I think decreasing socioeconomic inequality is definitely a possibility, but I’m unsure as to how it will all play out. Would socioeconomic inequality decrease because there would be people able to “level up” because of their partners or could it just be because there might be systematic changes in the future? I think that socioeconomic gaps could be closing because of interracial couples and the possibility for those in lower social classes to have opportunities that they would not have without those relationships; it’ll be interesting to observe how the person with more ability or privilege supports and benefits the other partner to close the socioeconomic gap. I think, as interracial marriage increases, that we’ll also see a pattern of power dynamics relating to race, seeing as one partner may seem to hold more power and control over the other person in the relationship because of the benefits that they can offer socioeconomically. It would also be interesting to see, if socioeconomic inequality will decrease as interracial marriage increases, if couples begin to formulate in order to benefit their own socioeconomic status instead of fulfilling a desire for love and companionship.

Hannah Poulter

hpoulter2 — 2023-09-14 01:10:24 UTC

I do partly believe that, as socioeconomic inequality decreases, interracial marriage will increase. One reason for this is that, as the gaps in socioeconomic status decrease and it becomes less imbalanced between members of different social groups, there will be a much greater opportunity for people to socialise and become acquainted with people of different backgrounds and ethnicities. This would then enable them to develop deeper connections with these people and may lead to them forming a relationship that could end in marriage. Unfortunately, even in today’s society, it’s still very much the case that white people tend to be in better school systems, experience the benefits of hereditary wealth and status, and generally reap the benefits from the inequalities between members of different socioeconomic groups, than people of different ethnicities. However, in recent decades there has been a much greater number of people who are marrying partners who are of a different race to them. This may be due to the decreases in socioeconomic inequality, however, to say that marriage is solely based on a person's income, education and occupation is potentially superficial as I believe there are many factors that dictate someone’s decision to marry their partner.

Kasandra Santiago

kasandra17 — 2023-09-14 02:44:59 UTC

I think that there will be a decrease in socioeconomic inequality as interracial marriage increases. I think the biggest reason this would factor in is because of racism and the separation in class in relation to race. Let's say for example a white male and who has more “privilege” in society than a latin woman who comes from a lower social class meet online, and fall in love, meet in person and get married. The lower class Latin women would marry into a higher social class and therefore fall into a higher socioeconomic class, and their kids will now also fall under the same higher socioeconomic class and from there that pattern will continue and it'll become a cycle for that family. As that continues to happen with different races marrying into higher economic classes the link/chain will only grow. With time these actions will decrease socioeconomic inequality. I haven't personally experienced this but in making different friends and meeting and learning about their families it definitely does tend to work this way. I had a white/caucasian friend who had a white dad who came from a business family and followed in those steps and a mom who went to the same high school as her dad but who came from a low income hispanic community and she fell in love with her dad and with time got married. Her mom and now their family is in a higher socioeconomic place than her moms family was before meeting her dad and that chain will only be passed down as interracial marriages increase because race does sadly, because it shouldn’t, play a role in economy and social classes.

Chloe Christner

cchristn — 2023-09-14 03:01:31 UTC

I think socioeconomic inequality will decrease as interracial marriage increases but I think it will take a while. As we learned in class, the generational patterns of racism are ingrained and going to be hard to change. People of color are more likely to live in poverty, make less wages, have less resources, and be over policed. This has been true for centuries. As interracial marriage rises, POC will be more mixed into prodominantly white societies that they weren’t before. These people will have more opportunity at socioeconomic equality. I am mixed and have grown up around mainly white people, in a white neighborhood, at a white school. I had access to more resources and opportunities. I had socioeconomic stability. However, poc that don’t marry outside of their race, are more likely to stay in the cycle of socioeconomic inequality. In the system we are in, it is hard to escape this cycle and have access to the same socioeconomic equality that other people have. I think there will be some change in socioeconomic inequality as a result of interracial marriages, but major change will take time and additional measures.

Aadya Nijhawan

2023-09-14 03:20:29 UTC

Socioeconomic inequality and interracial marriage are multifaceted, complex issues that are influenced by a wide range of economic, social and cultural factors. I believe that socioeconomic inequality will decrease as interracial marriage will increase. Interracial marriages will play a key role in promoting social integration by uniting people from different racial backgrounds. This will lead to better understanding, empathy and lessened racial prejudice in society. When people from backgrounds that are different come together, they are more likely to support policies and initiatives that promote diversity and equality. Interracial partners challenge racial stereotypes and norms. This will lead to social reevaluation of biases and prejudices which will contribute to efforts to reduce socioeconomic inequality. In fact, interracial marriage can also lead to the upliftment of one partner by other partner who may be in a higher class. This would help to reduce the gap between classes. These marriages can also contribute positively to social integration and challenge racial stereotypes. Interracial marriages can also result in households which have diverse and ethnic backgrounds. Such diversity can lead to a broader range of income level within the household due to different access to education and employment opportunities.

Julia Kirsh

2023-09-14 04:56:54 UTC

I think that socioeconomic inequality will decrease as interracial marriages increase. Interracial marriages are one of the steps that cam be taken to promote social integration even further. By breaking the barrier of the norms that have traced back for years and years, society is getting closer and closer to decreasing these socioeconomic gaps that are still extremely prevalent in society. Hopefully, racial discrimination will decrease as a result of an increase in interracial marriages and will help to create a more inclusive society as a whole.

Along with interracial marriages comes an influx of diverse perspectives. When people from different backgrounds, ethnicities, cultures, religions, etc, come together in such a close manner, these different aspects are shared with one another and knowledge of alternate perspectives will increase. This increase in knowledge within diverse partners, and especially if they have offspring, will help make society as a whole more educated and familiar with many different cultures and familial traditions. A pattern that I can think of in regards to this concept, is an increase in alternative perspectives that can lead to an overall more knowledgeable and informed society. Although social media definitely sets unreachable and unachievable standards, it also does a great job at increasing visibility and awareness for much of the socioeconomic inequality that takes place in our society. For example, all a user needs to do is repost an awareness post to their instagram story and then all of their followers will have access to see that post. From then on, if their followers continue to repost that same post, the audience will continue to widen and even more people will become more educated on the subject.

Sage Shimabukuro

2023-09-14 05:59:31 UTC

I believe that socioeconomic inequality will decrease a small amount as interracial couples increase. In many ways, socioeconomic inequality is rooted in racism. For example, in class, we learned about redlining and how disproportionally marginalized black communities are. Interracial couples allow for greater racial tolerance. However interracial couples do not guarantee social mobility. the rich like to marry the rich and the poor marry the poor regardless of race. The rich and famous always marry other people in the same socioeconomic circle as them. I think that this is true for many different reasons. In most cases, people tend to be more attractive to people who are similar to them. People who grew up with money tend to have very different values than people who grew up with less money. In addition, people who are in similar socioeconomic circles are more likely to be in social circles. Being in the same social circle allows for a much higher chance of being in a position to date. This is exactly what is portrayed in the media; looking at almost all the rich people on social media they are always dating other rich and famous people. It is very rare to see someone from a high socioeconomic status dating someone from a different socioeconomic status.

Leilani Mate

lmate4 — 2023-09-14 07:45:17 UTC

As interracial marriage increases, I think that there will be a greater sense of cultural understanding and racial inclusivity, but I don’t necessarily think socioeconomic inequality will decrease. Interracial marriage and relationships promote diversity by challenging existing biases and crossing racialized barriers. An example of this appears in my own family, as my African mom and Filipino dad overcame their prejudices and connected their families regardless of their different backgrounds. However, I don’t think interracial marriage will “solve” racism, as it consists of a larger systemic issue engrained in society. Similarly, due to existing economic structures, I don’t think that the increase in interracial marriage will decrease socioeconomic inequality. A pattern I think will continue to emerge as interracial marriage increases is the marginalization of certain racial mixes. Many people tend to think of interracial marriage as simply between a white person and a minority, but that overlooks the population of non-white interracial couples. For example, an individual who is half white and half Asian will still be privileged over someone who is half black and half Asian. Another reason why I don’t think socioeconomic inequality will significantly decrease is the tendency for those in the same socioeconomic class to marry each other. Because class inequality is so stark, it’s rare for someone in a higher social class to find themselves interacting in the same sphere as someone in a lower social class, often preventing them from forming a romantic relationship. Therefore, regardless of race, class inequality will continue to persist.

Michael Blasi

mblasi5 — 2023-09-14 17:29:08 UTC

I disagree that socioeconomic inequality will decrease as interracial couples begin to increase. While I somewhat agree with this virtue, Americans are divided far more by class than race; therefore, interracial marriage will typically only occur within a single socioeconomic class (Low, Middle, or Upper). Statistically, caucasian families have a significantly higher socioeconomic status when compared to minority groups, so I believe this statement is heavily built upon the belief that interracial marriage will magically bridge the gap between lower and upper-class families. I could not disagree more. At the end of the day we generally distinguish and separate ourselves more by class than by race, and while occasionally interracial marriages may bridge some sort of socioeconomic gap, I am confident that a very large majority of them will not. When I was a student in high school, a very large portion of the student body was made up of underprivileged students of all races hailing from low socioeconomic backgrounds. However, a significantly smaller portion of the student body was noticeably quite wealthy, hailing from upper-class class and upper-middle-class backgrounds. Despite both groups being equally diverse, the kids in these respective friend groups would rarely or never at all mix. Within both groups, many interracial relationships took place; however, they remained within the confines of their respective friend group–which was largely determined by their family’s socioeconomic status. Therefore, I believe that the same will play out in the future as interracial marriages continue to increase in our world today.

Fin Liu

fzliu — 2023-09-14 17:30:07 UTC

It is wholly possible that socioeconomic inequality will decrease as interracial marriage increases. In America especially, there’s been a history of racial inequality and other systemic issues and caucasians have always had a step up in our society. As interracial marriage increases, it may also lead to an increase in marrying between different social classes and socioeconomic statuses. More recently, there has been a shift from marrying for finances and class to marrying for love. Finances may be a less important factor. With increasing methods to meet people and more accessibility to higher education and other services, people are meeting people that they would not have been able to meet previously. Different social classes intermingle more, and different races intermingle more. It is also possible that despite an increase in interracial marriage, the same standards are set. People may only pursue others of a similar or greater income. I have seen people around me dating individuals of different races and with different financial situations. Especially in college, I’ve seen people interact with people that they probably would not have interacted with back at home.

Rosy Almanzar

2023-09-14 20:11:16 UTC

I believe that socioeconomic inequality decreasing as interracial marriage increases can occur but to an extent. There undeniably exists a relationship between race and socioeconomic classes as there are systems that span over centuries that were put in place to suppress people of color. If people of color enter relationships with other races, such as white people, they’re able to have access to opportunities that they otherwise wouldn’t have had. As more people of color make it into spheres with higher socioeconomic status they can make way for others. That is not to say that people of color must marry outside of the race to advance, that's a dangerous narrative to tell. Additionally, if people of different races yet similar socioeconomic standings marry it’s unlikely to have the effect of diminishing that inequality. For example, across my hometown being racially mixed is quite normal but it's still one of the poorest towns in the state.

Nicole Leihe

2023-09-14 21:56:45 UTC

While it is possible that interracial marriages can give rise to opportunities for people to move in between different socioeconomic classes, I don't think that interracial marriages will help to deconstruct the system that currently upholds socioeconomic inequality. Many of the interracial marriages that I see on social media these days are typically between people who are already both in a high social class - while this may seem like a construed point of view, I've noticed even outside of social media that people tend to find their partners in the same social class, as those tend to be the people they are around the most frequently and thus spend the most time with. However, all of this isn't to say that there isn't a chance that interracial marriages can help decrease socioeconomic inequality. In interracial marriages between people of different classes, the person in the relationship that holds more financial and economic stability (which, based on historical patterns is typically the white partner) could likely help to support their partner who has less. Interracial marriages can definitely help individual families overcome and marry out of low socioeconomic class conditions, but I don't see how it can break down a longstanding system of inequality entirely.

Caroline Mikes

2023-09-15 00:36:55 UTC

I think socioeconomic inequality could potentially decrease as interracial marriage increases due to the fact that a significant amount of inequality is the result of systematic racism and the impacts of generational wealth and opportunity. As future generations of families intertwine through interracial marriage, but specifically in the case of a major class difference, in theory, the wealth foundation becomes more even. Not only should this help to even the playing field for two families starting in very different positions as marriage creates one, but interracial marriage can help to increase empathy and understanding. It is much harder to actively support a system that oppresses someone that you love and care about, as well as one that is directly related to you and your own familial outcome. Additionally, it is harder for white people to deny the existence of systematic racism and inequality if they have a more intimate understanding and view of its impact through their partner. It obviously should not require love or marriage to gain such empathy or recognition of privilege, but unfortunately it sometimes does. While there are societal benefits to interracial marriage, I think these unions can be especially hard and will unfortunately introduce new types of power dynamics and roles within relationships, as well as methods for control and abuse. I also do have some amount of hesitation in terms of interracial marriage helping to close wealth gaps because I would assume many interracial couples have similar financial statuses and meet similarly to same race couples in schools, jobs, neighborhoods (all influenced by one’s economic condition). Even if they do have different financial backgrounds, the socioeconomic minority has likely already climbed the social ladder prior to meeting their partner because there is a certain amount of similarity that would likely be needed in order to create contact. In my eyes, attributing the disadvantaged partner’s success to interracial marriage or the benefits of their partner’s status is diminishing of the work and success that is by all means their own.

Fadi Kabi

kabi1 — 2023-09-15 01:09:01 UTC

I definitely think that as we see an increase in interracial marriage, we'll experience less socioeconomic inequality, but not significantly less. There might be a slight decrease in the inequality, when someone from a economically disadvantaged groups pairs up with someone who is in a economically advantaged group. The economically disadvantaged partner will inherit some of the wealth that the other partners' family has passed down to them. But, from what I have realized, people usually date and marry within the race they are with, especially in my culture and where I am from. Sure, there are some exceptions, but I do not think it is significant enough. Even if we see a dramatic increase in interracial couples, people tend to be with people who they more close relate with. That means someone who is likely in the same, socioeconomic class.

melody wu

wumelody1 — 2023-09-15 04:19:27 UTC

I believe that interracial relationships don’t necessarily reduce racism, however, interracial marriages can improve social integration and minimize racial divisions, both of which benefit society. However, interracial marriage has little direct impact on socioeconomic disparities. Socioeconomic inequality is caused by a number of complex factors, including economic policy, employment opportunities, access to education, structural concerns, etc. While interracial marriage can promote diversity and understanding among different ethnic and cultural groups, it is not the only approach to solve socioeconomic disparities. Addressing inequality entails comprehensive measures such as equitable economic policies, better educational opportunities, and social justice initiatives in order to develop a fairer society.

Katie Youn

2023-09-15 06:37:57 UTC

Because of how socioeconomic status has been so intertwined with racial identity throughout American history, I believe that socioeconomic inequality will decrease as interracial marriage increases, even though it may be unintentional. In the past, the idea of marriage being a necessity for financial stability (particularly for women) was not uncommon, and was often the only way people could move up the social ladder. Nowadays, marriage is more of a symbol of personal fulfillment and an important milestone in adulthood, but that doesn’t mean people can’t benefit from their partner’s socioeconomic status. Although I don’t know of any interracial couples that have benefitted from a partner’s wealth, I’ve heard of stories of my mom’s friends who’ve married well and were able to pursue personal dreams that would’ve been too risky otherwise, like starting businesses. I imagine a similar thing would happen, but in a more complicated manner. Not all families are accepting of interracial relationships, and socioeconomic status is usually tied down to generational wealth. Interracial couples may not be able to receive the same benefits as couples of the same race because of this. Of course, socioeconomic inequality is an incredibly complex issue that cannot be solved easily, especially by individual decisions. Like racism, it is not a problem that can be solved through individuals, since the problem does not only exist within individuals but rather within systems and institutions. Suggesting that the correlation between the decrease of socioeconomic inequality and the increase of interracial marriage could imply that the problem is much simpler than it actually is.

Thomas Bittencourt

tbittenc — 2023-09-15 06:53:56 UTC

Yes — I believe that as interracial marriages increase, socioeconomic inequality will decrease. What I'm not too sure of is whether this would be an example of causation or correlation. I think that an increase in interracial marriages means people from different socioeconomic classes will have more opportunities to "escape" where they are, in other words we'll see less of a disparity. This is because if we look at socioeconomic status according to race, I would assume those who are privileged tend to be socioeconomically better off. An increase in interracial marriages would mean members from various levels would intermingle and help each other out. I feel as though there are many other factors to lowering the inequality found in classes, but interracial marriages would certainly have an effect, and that pattern would be noticable.

Victoria Ortiz

vickieortiz2004 — 2023-09-15 20:24:58 UTC

I believe that socioeconomic inequality has less to do with marriage, and much more to do with access to resources, wage gaps, discrimination, and privilege. Although interracial marriages are increasing as society becomes more accepting, I don’t think that will make a prevalent impact on socioeconomic inequality. Upper class is usually surrounded by others within the upper class, which is seen through the schools that they attend throughout their childhood, which then transcends to their pursuance of higher-level university education. Financial aid, scholarships, and magnet/charter schools are resources for the lower class to reach people in the upper classes, but typically the socioeconomic classes aren’t engaging within each other. Despite interracial marriage, there is still the idea of equal status exchange that also affects socioeconomic inequality. I believe that generationally, as access to resources for the lower class increases, socioeconomic inequality will decrease, but only over time. Interracial marriage only became legal 56 years ago in Loving v. Commonwealth of Virginia. While this may seem like a long time, it is not enough time for direct impact on socioeconomic inequality to be made. Hopefully, as more time passes, the rise of interracial marriage shows a decrease in racism and discrimination, which should directly impact socioeconomic inequality.

Zoe Hammer

zthammer — 2023-09-15 20:29:52 UTC

I think socioeconomic inequality will slightly decrease as interracial marriage increases because it will begin to deconstruct racial barriers due to systemic inequality and long-term prejudice. With couples marrying across racial and class sectors, there might be minor advancement in individuals gaining access to resources of a social class previously out of reach to them. Furthermore, the growth of interracial couples will create more diverse cultural backgrounds for the following children, creating a more accepting generation across socioeconomic groups. When thinking about examples, the first thing that came to my mind was the use of social media and couples displaying their love via the internet. It’s possible that with the publicizing of interracial relationships, more people (particularly the youth) will normalize marriage across different racial and financial backgrounds. However, interracial relationships can also create conflict for the family due to outside stereotyping, isolation, and hostility from others’ internal prejudices. I also think that since socioeconomic inequality is such a wide-spanning issue in our society, the increase of interracial marriage will not entirely turn over these beliefs that have been sustained due to years of gender, racial, and class inequality. Additionally, I wonder if there will continue to be power hierarchies within these relationships (even if they are subconscious) when one spouse stems from a family of higher socioeconomic status.

Yasmeena Sharif

2023-09-15 21:36:10 UTC

I do think that socioeconomic inequality will decrease as interracial marriage increases. However, I also think that there are a lot of neighborhoods in America that are predominantly one race, and that in these neighborhoods, it may be significantly less likely for people to marry outside of their race, and so the socioeconomic makeup of the community may stay the same. That being said, I think that as people marry interracially, the gap between socioeconomic statuses will begin to decrease, but I don't think that this change will be immediate. Rather, I think that this may be a trend that we begin to see over the next few decades- thirty, forty, fifty years from now, as more people enter into interracial marriages. In the present, I think that socioeconomic statuses will likely stay more/less the same, due to many (American) neighborhoods being composed of people who are primarily of the same race.

Tyler Gevas

2023-09-15 22:15:04 UTC

I believe socioeconomic inequality will decrease as interracial marriage increases. Interracial marriage promotes social integration and breaks down racial barriers. When people from different racial backgrounds enter into relationships and form families, they create diverse social networks that extend beyond their immediate families. These networks connect people from various socioeconomic backgrounds, leading to greater exposure to different perspectives, experiences, and opportunities. This exposure can challenge stereotypes and biases, fostering greater empathy and understanding among individuals. By dismantling racial prejudice and discrimination, interracial marriage can contribute to a more inclusive society where everyone has a fair chance to succeed regardless of their racial background. Also interracial marriages promote more economic chances for individuals, communities, and families. When individuals from different socioeconomic backgrounds come together, they often bring together different resources, skills, and networks. This can lead to improved economic opportunities for both partners as they leverage their combined strengths. The children of interracial couples often benefit from increased social capital and a broader range of experiences which can enhance their educational and career prospects.
However, it is important to note that while interracial marriage has the potential to decrease socioeconomic inequality, it is not a guarantee. Socioeconomic disparities are deeply rooted and influenced by various factors, including historical and systemic injustices. Addressing these issues requires a comprehensive and multi-faceted approach that involves education, employment opportunities, access to healthcare, and social welfare programs, among other things.

Miles Linde

mlinde5 — 2023-09-15 23:17:04 UTC

I would argue that while socioeconomic inequality would be decreased in many ways due to an increase in interracial marriage, the factors causing a increase in socioeconomic inequality heavily outweigh that.

Due to interracial marriage, factors of race that increase socioeconomic inequality will probably decrease, in either number or strength. Race, in general, will become less and less of a social idea, as more "races" are created by mixed families and traditions and cultures slowly die out from globalization. This will cause discrimination on the basis of race (such as housing discrimination) to decrease, leading the link negative socioeconomic status linked with race to also decrease in correlation.

However, as technology increases and automation becomes more rampant, the people who own the rights to that technology and those creating that technology will gain in socioeconomic status, while "workers" will become less and less valued. This can be seen in other times of great technological advancement such as the Industrial Revolution and there's no reason to believe the Computer Revolution we are experiencing will not just make the difference between the top .1% and the bottom 50% even larger.

Georgia Klass

GeorgiaKlass — 2023-09-15 23:32:24 UTC

I feel as though socioeconomic inequality will decrease as interracial marriage increases. As a result of institutionalized racism, typically individuals of color have been in a lower socioeconomic claws. Therefore, based on past statistics, there appears to be a correlation between socioeconomic status and race. However, as more couples begin to marry individuals of a different race other than themselves, socioeconomic inequality will begin to decrease. Individuals of color that may be of a lower economic status are marrying white individuals that may be of a higher social status, which allows the couple to find a middle ground between their socioeconomic classes. This means that a new pattern is emerging: as interracial marriage increases, socioeconomic inequality will decrease.

In real life, I have noticed that a white married couple is typically more wealthy than a couple of color. As we become more educated and mature as a society overall from social media and other forms of media (eg. television, Youtube, online platforms, etc.), institutionalized racism is on a downward trend. Consequently, along with the new pattern that I believe may be emerging, the line between race and socioeconomic status is beginning to diminish. With that being said, interracial marriage is progressive step towards a decrease in socioeconomic disparity with respect to race.

Alexa Castillo

2023-09-15 23:41:57 UTC

Interracial marriage challenges a lot of stereotypes and biases, and the media representation of it helps to normalize diversity. I dont think interracial marriages themselves will reduce socioeconomic inequality, but they can indirectly influence economic disparities. In my day-to-day life I havent necessarily seen how interracial marriage affects issues like these but I do believe that everything starts somewhere and the promotion of diversity is one of the first steps. Interracial marriage does support a change in ideas and soietal norms but I dont think that in itself it will have an effect on socioeconomic inequality. There is a lot of general effort needed to change something like that and the idea of changing it shouldnt solely rely on interracial marriages, families and relationships.

Falcon Fu

keyufu — 2023-09-15 23:43:46 UTC

I think socioeconomic inequality will decrease as interracial marriage increases. Inequality in most cases is caused by a certain level of discrimination. The discrimination will cause inequal distribution of resources or unequal policy which eventually lead to socioeconomic inequality. However, in the case of interracial marriage, if people of different races get together and accept each other more often than before, less cases of inequality should happen in our society. I don’t have much experience about this case, but for what I observe on the internet, people with different cultural background are accepting other cultures. To look at a bigger picture, if an Asian family started to have family members of other ethnicities, then the traditions and cultural value of the new members will gradually blend in with this Asian family. The new family will also influence people around them like their friends or relatives. Some successful family members would support family members that are less successful. This could each an interracial cooperation.

Sophia Cachay

scachay2 — 2023-09-15 23:48:18 UTC

I believe that socioeconomic inequality will decrease as interracial marriage increases. I think that this inverse relationship is rooted in the fact that interracial marriages allows for a blend of social interaction and thus diversity of financial, educational and class backgrounds. However, I think it’s also important to note that interracial marriages alone will not lead to an increase or decrease, whatever your take may be, on socioeconomic inequality. Sure, this intertwining of race paves the way for a more diverse society, and thus more diverse world of economic situations, but it’s the systematic barriers, resources and acess to education that will ultimately frame the path for the rise or fall of socioeconomic inequality. In my own first sight experience, my extended family has multiple interracial marriages, yet all have not really accomplished any difference in socioeconomic status. Though, obviously the changes may not occur among individual couples, from my observations it just doesn’t seem like interracial marriages are the dictating factors of the socioeconomic results among one single generation. Therefore, I believe that as generations emerge we will finally see the pattern of economic inequality decrease

Orr Bar-Yossef

baryosse — 2023-09-15 23:54:45 UTC

I believe that as interracial marriage increases, there is a possibility that socioeconomic inequality will decrease as a result. In today’s society, white people are socioeconomically advantaged—meaning they often live in places with better schools that offer more opportunities. This creates a cycle that makes it hard for people to climb the social and economic ladder and widens the socioeconomic gap. Those already privileged enough to benefit from good public education have a higher chance of pursuing secondary education and therefore a higher chance of finding jobs that pay higher salaries that will make it possible for them to continue living in areas with good school districts. Interracial marriage could lead to marriages between people who have different socioeconomic statuses, and therefore allow those in a lower class access to more opportunities and resources available to only those in higher classes. This could enable socioeconomic mobility more than ever before and decrease socioeconomic inequality. However, in what I have observed from those around me, I have noticed that people tend to form relationships with people who have a similar socioeconomic status to themselves. If this pattern continues, then I believe socioeconomic inequality will continue to be prominent in society.

Maya Lewis

2023-09-16 01:41:22 UTC

I definitely think socioeconomic inequality in interracial marriage has the potential to decrease. I don't know when that will happen, but honestly in the past 50 years, so much progress has been made. Obviously, there is still so much that can be done. So many more people are in interracial relationships than ever before, and I think that trend will continue. Since race plays a big role in socioeconomic status, more mixed-race families will naturally create a more equal socioeconomic class.

Parker Taylor

parkerta3 — 2023-09-17 04:01:21 UTC

I think that it is definitely possible that socioeconomic inequality will decrease as interracial marriage increases, but I am not entirely sure that these two shifts will happen in direct proportion to each other. Interracial marriage is something that has the possibility to remedy socioeconomic disadvantages for some individuals depending on the socioeconomic statuses of both partners entering the marriage, but each instance of interracial marriage will surely not always correlate with a change in its’ partners’ socioeconomic statuses. Systemic forms of oppression that are inherently racialized like the MLK streets we discussed in class mean that race can play a big factor in socioeconomic opportunities or lack thereof. Thus, aspects of marriage like cohabitation could lead to more opportunities for people who, for example, live in these oppressed geographical areas: if they were to move away to live with a partner elsewhere, or if more socioeconomically comfortable partners came to inhabit these areas. These sorts of changes could help blur socioeconomic binaries, but would not always do so. As such, I think that interracial marriage rates increasing could result in more socioeconomic equality to an extent but it would definitely not be a 1:1 ratio. It is also important to consider that regardless of a marriage being interracial or not, people will still often take their prospective partners’ socioeconomic statuses into consideration when choosing to be with, and further on choosing to potentially marry, them. It can be argued that those in the upper class would often be predisposed to seeking out partners that are similarly financially comfortable to ensure a prosperous future for their family if they were to have children. In this way, some socioeconomic barriers in regards to marriage preferences would still stay in place as well despite the rise of interracial marriages.

suedesan — 2023-09-20 18:15:46 UTC

Interracial marriage can contribute to a reduction in socionomic inequalities over time. As individuals from different racial backgrounds form families together, their extended networks of friends and family may become more diverse. This can foster greater understanding and empathy, potentially leading to decreased discrimination and socioeconomic inequality. For example, on my moms side, my grandparents are white, they grew up with parents who were only surrounded by people who looked like them, causing a lack of understand when it came to other racial backgrounds. When they settled down together, they decides that adoption was a good decision for them. Each of the five children they adopted came from different background and cultures. My mom grew up to have her only child with a man born in korea, my uncle settled down in the philippines and my aunt with a rabbi from Africa. Although it was easy for my grandparents to judge all of these different families and ways of living, they instead embraced it. If they had raised biological children in their same little town, they would have never been exposed to all these different ways of living which makes it a lot easier to foster stereotypes and prejudices.

This week, we've talked and read about attraction and hookup culture. After spending seven (or more) weeks here at USC, have you seen anything we're learning about this week reflected in interactions between students?

eshimada1 — 2023-09-25 19:01:34 UTC

Bridget Wang

bmwang1 — 2023-09-27 00:05:00 UTC

Among many of my friends, I’ve noticed that the majority of them often find prideful and arrogant men attractive. They seem to be attracted to the way that these crushes present themselves, but when they continue to conduct themselves in a prideful and arrogant manner, my friends tend to have an issue with that, becoming frustrated or angry or sad. It’s confusing to me how one can be attracted to someone at first glance but not expect or desire the same characteristics that one displays in that first impression. In my mind, I’m thinking, “what did you expect from him?” However, I can understand the appeal because we have been conditioned by patriarchal societal norms to usually deem confident, or overconfident, people more attractive than those who may appear to be more meager and shy, even if, in the long run, those men aren’t viable options for a long-term relationship. I guess that’s another factor as to why prideful men seem to be more attractive: when one is looking for a hookup or being discouraged from pursuing a relationship, some can assume that those who display such a prideful attitude are not people who are looking for a long-term relationship either.

Julia Kirsh

jkirsh4 — 2023-09-27 01:16:09 UTC

I can definitely see these topics that we have discussed this week present throughout many social interactions that I have had here on campus in addition to at home. In class, we discussed the three main facial traits that are typically preferred in potential partners throughout all cultures: youth, symmetry, and averageness. One that I want to point out specifically is youth. I have heard many friends of mine, of different genders, sexualities, etc., speak about their partner or potential partner’s facial traits and how their eyes play a big role. One of the two most common facial traits that people will point out when talking about someone's appearance is their eyes and their smile. Big eyes, in relation to youth, are definitely a factor that I have heard friends of mine talk about when describing someone's physical attraction. Another topic that I have heard many people around me discuss on campus is the relationship between an individual's expression and how it relates to their level of physical attractiveness. In their research, Tracy and Beall found that pride expressions are typically deemed most attractive in masculine-presenting individuals. While I have heard many people on campus talk about how they find a confident/prideful man attractive, they also find it unattractive if a man is too confident or prideful in themselves. The same goes for the feminine-presenting individuals; Typically, happiness is the most attractive expression in a female, but if a female is overly happy, then she is just considered “fake” or out of touch with reality. I have found that in this day and age it is extremely hard to fit this stereotypical image in order to please everyone, so it is best to be your true self.

Mei Higashi

mjhigash — 2023-09-27 02:05:52 UTC

Absolutely, yes. There are a few significant themes I have both witnessed and experienced during this transitional period! Firstly, I immediately noticed an intrinsically driven but externally performative urge for some individuals to “find” a companion, whether it be for a casual or serious relationship. I believe that this is out of an internal need to seek comfort through attachment. Secondly, I found myself in conflict with my identity when challenged with the theory of dramaturgy and the social/mental script. After analyzing a particular relationship of mine, I scolded myself for revealing details about my schooling and sharing the more masculine, “businesswoman” traits of myself. I realized quickly that this was unhealthy; why should I be afraid of expressing my passions and my characters? The truth is, I was trained to mask my ambitions in the face of a man, so as not to belittle his accomplishments or grandeurs. A partner that doesn’t support your career nor your future is not a partner that I aim for. I think that these kinds of individuals should be called “dusties,” because they are discardable and should be ignored. A dusty is an individual that must never be considered as a future partner - instead of waiting for their calls or urging for the bare minimum, a dusty should be sweeped up and vacuumed away. The social script of gender roles is becoming somewhat deconstructed, particularly a woman’s ability to provide for herself; I question the reasoning behind my accidental continuation of archaic mindsets.

On another level, I would like to address the rational choice theory from 1776. Though I have not found distinct commonalities between the communities I am in, I notice that with a greater selection of interests (lots of social events, networking, exposure points) we tend to “weigh out” much more. In friend groups, I observe that individuals feel as if there will always be someone or something better. When applied to dating, this theory seems like more of an individual approach, but I utilize it to make sensible decisions about where I put my time. In general this theory can be used as a tool to prioritize what is most important in life as a whole.

Lastly, I see a great amount of cognitive dissonance that occurs when there is an inconsistency in a persons’ attitudes and their literal choices. I find many instances, particularly in reference to ‘hookup culture,’ where an individual will claim that they want something casual and get emotionally involved instead, and vice versa. I do believe that a main component of these outcomes are the theory of proximity, but I find it confusing when actions do not line up with beliefs. Of course, FOMO is another proponent.

I have many other thoughts but this is definitely much longer than 250 words! Sorry!

Mei Higashi

mjhigash — 2023-09-27 02:06:27 UTC

I have many other thoughts but this is definitely much longer than 250 words! Sorry!

Thompson Phan

thompsonphan — 2023-09-27 23:36:00 UTC

After spending several weeks here at USC, I can infer that the hookup culture here is very widespread. It’s very common here for the girls to hookup with frat boys even if they don’t find them attractive. The status of being a frat brother seems to be the most attractive trait, even if their character is pretentious and douchey. Many students use dating apps such as Tinder and Bumble in order to find hookups on and around campus. One discovery that shocked me is that students will place a whiteboard in front of the door of a study room and hookup inside. USC is also ranked at #14 for “Most Attractive Students” which is also a factor into the hookup culture on campus.

Dor Peretz

peretzdor1 — 2023-09-27 23:59:50 UTC

Yes, I’ve definitely seen some of what we’re learning about hookup culture reflected in interactions between students at USC this week. I’d say the hookup culture here is most prevalent at the frat parties because those environments with dancing and people *under the influence* tend to lend to people making more impulsive decisions when it comes to their love life. For example, a girl friend of mine came up to me at a frat party this weekend and said “oh my god I just made out with the most mid guy” and another friend of mine kissed a guy at a frat party this weekend, and he ended up trying to invite her to come home with him at the end of the night, implying at them doing more. So in that sense, the frat parties are often conducive to hook up culture. I think also though that people can develop deeper relationships from something that starts as a hookup, and while hookup culture is definitely prominent here, a lot of times people tend to end up wanting more out of the relationship than just a sexual benefit. I’ve had multiple conversations with my friends about how we want to be understood and need deeper conversations with someone to truly feel connected to someone. And I think that relates to the love languages that we talked about this week too; quality times or words of affirmation etc. come into play even for people feeling comfortable with only casual romantic situations.

Rosy Almanzar

2023-09-28 05:51:28 UTC

I would say hook up culture is 100% the most prevalent at USC, especially in comparison to people looking for long term relationships. Honestly, I believe that hook up culture is also very common amongst college campuses and our age group as a whole. This could be because of the environments of where we meet people, especially at USC, frats are the epicenter of social life for most people. Most guys at the frat have the singular intention of finding a girl to hook up with and I have definitely seen that. There's a certain time at a party where you look around and EVERYONE is hooking up. You also see things that frats implement to maximize their possibility of hooking up with girls; like making sure they get girls as drunk as possible or controlling the ratio of boys to girls (by not letting in guys). I personally have very contrasting opinions on this culture because to an extent I think it's a great way to explore your sexuality in a low risk way. But, at the same time there is this idea that men benefit much more from hook up culture than women do. Moving on to attraction at USC especially in the realm of Greek life there definitely is a set of beauty standards that exist. These ideals reminded me of the idea of how "averageness" is considered one of the most attractive traits because you do see that some of these organizations are either consciously or unconsciously set on having a uniformity amongst them.

Chloe Christner

cchristn — 2023-09-28 18:13:42 UTC

Since I've been here, I've seen that hookups are present but not as common as I expected. I know a couple people that have had hookups, but not a lot. A lot of people broke up with their significant other for college so they are emotionally unavailable, at least for right now. Also, there is a presence of relationship churring with those people because they will still be in contact with their ex. I only know one or two friends that have gone on a date since we have been here, so that definitely isnt common. I haven't seen any actual relationships form so far. I think since we are in the first couple months of school everyone is still figuring everything out so there isn't a big focus on hookups or looking for a relationship. Freshman boys that are in frats are pledging so that takes up a lot of their time. Also figuring out class work and your schedule is the main focus for most people. I think a lot of people want to assess what the culture is like here and get to know people before looking for a partner. These first few months are important for finding friends so I think that is what people are more focused on. However, hookups are definitely still happening. Since we are living in dorms on a college campus, I feel that it's easier to have casual hookups. You can just walk to their room. It's convenient. Also, because we are in college and we are with so many new people, you can hookup with someone and then not see them. I think as the school year goes on, hookups, romantic interactions, and relationships will become more common but right now they aren't as prevalent. People have been more focused on school, getting settled and making friends.

Joan Song

2023-09-28 20:12:25 UTC

To start, I believe most would agree there are so many more people, therefore more “attractive” people in college than in high school. Especially as a freshman coming into the welcome weeks and settling on campus, I’ve seen common patterns in this USC culture (not even just USC, but most colleges, based on what I’ve heard.) Whenever someone says, “I have a little something with (usually medium ugly guy),” the immediate question that follows is, “Did you guys hook up?” I found that interesting. Hookup culture has been so common that “a little something” automatically leads people to think of physical intimacy, whether it be kissing or sleeping together. Specifically for freshmen, I guess that comes from having the "freedom" from living at their parents' houses, having curfews, or even having no boyfriends or girlfriends on a stricter level. On this limitless and unrestrained land, they seem to seek casual and "fun" activities that increase the dopamines. Another common pattern is that people are scared of commitments. They might have experienced heartbreaks from serious relationships, so they keep their emotions away from love and vulnerability. That makes hookups sound appealing to them since there is no string attached, although some people end up catching feelings. Personally, I don't know how to feel about this part of culture, but I just know it is happening and is still growing.

Jada Griffiths

jadagrif — 2023-09-28 21:51:20 UTC

Hookup culture is definitely something that’s taken over our generation and especially in college. Since USC is such a large school with so many different types of people I think there is definitely a smaller circle less likely to give into hookup culture but a large mass of the student body is definitely active in it. Going to a smaller high school school it is a lot harder to be into hookup culture without it getting around, rumors being spread and causing a lot of drama. Here it is definitely more normalized and excused. At USC I feel like it is a lot more prominent to find people solely interested in hooking up especially if you are into the party and nightlife here. For most of my friends there’s two different sides of the spectrum. The ones that party and go out to frats every weekend are highly into hookup culture but every else there is. Most people that go to these events don’t expect to get a relationship out of it but definitely have high expectations of hooking up with someone that night. Despite the negative notions surrounding it to some people especially at USC it’s something spontaneous and liberating. On the other hand, I have friends that are extremely against it so they stay away from situations where they could be swayed or it’s likely to be pushed on to them.

Kasandra Santiago

kasandra17 — 2023-09-28 21:54:10 UTC

After talking about attraction in class and about hookup culture I can definitely see the patterns portrayed at USC. One of the biggest things I’ve seen most times is that men tend to find the same women attractive. I think this correlates with our learning because we learned that cross-culturally people prefer youthful faces, symmetrical faces, and averageness. I believe that these women must hold those same features as they are found attractive by multiple people. Additionally, I think love languages are also portrayed everywhere. For example, I have two friends who are dating and never really walk without holding hands or hugging. This is them displaying their love language of physical touch. I believe that there are so many interactions like this that must happen on campus as love languages are expressed in each relationship differently but it is interesting that each relationship has its individual way of expressing love through their individual love languages. Moving on when speaking on hookup culture, I have never personally come in counter with that nor have I heard any stories but it is interesting to learn about how that pattern has come to be. I think it is really interesting to note, as mentioned in class, that depending on if you're looking for a hookup or a relationship, the places you will go vary drastically as the circumstances of both are different. It is hard to describe how hookup culture plays a role in the life of usc students but I don't doubt that it does as hookup culture has only grown with time because sex has been a more openly accepted and spoken topic.

Leilani Mate

lmate4 — 2023-09-29 02:04:07 UTC

After spending seven weeks at USC, I’ve definitely noticed the topics we’ve discussed reflected in interactions between students. In class, we examined the differing values of men and women in regards to attraction. An aspect of this topic I’ve particularly observed at USC is the tendency for men to highly value youth as a standard of attraction. For example, a few weeks ago at a frat party, I had a twenty-six year old attempt to romantically approach me even after I said I was only eighteen. This is indicative of the gendered power imbalance we discussed in class, and how it influences attraction and the relationships men may seek out. Speaking of frat parties, they’re also where I’ve noticed the prevalence of hookup culture at USC, and how it displays the lack of committed, serious relationships students experience. Instead, students tend to engage in relationships with little emotional or personal connection, especially while under the influence. In a particularly extreme example, one of my friends made out with a guy at a frat party, but couldn’t recall his name or what he looked like the day after. I’ve also definitely noticed the gender inequality and double standard in regards to hookup culture. Women are held to a stricter standard when it comes to sex and seeking out hookups, while men are able to have sex in any context. An example of this is once again found in USC’s party scene. Frat parties let girls in for free in order to have a favorable “ratio” and secure hookups. However, when a girl indulges in this system and hooks up with guys, she’s more likely to be criticized.

Caroline Mikes

2023-09-29 02:53:02 UTC

Hookup culture is definitely prevalent here, especially among our age. I’ve noticed it’s pretty hard to start a conversation with someone of the opposite sex without the immediate assumption of an intended hookup. I see a lot of fraternity guys preying on freshman girls specifically, which is kind of gross, but unsurprising. I think it’s a combination of what was discussed in the article - this idea of fulfilling sexual needs but prioritizing yourself and this new chapter over a relationship. But I also think freshman girls are in a vulnerable position. Some people haven’t had as much drinking experience, or maybe want to rebel against the environments and expectations they grew up with. Others are seeking validation after ending high school relationships. There’s definitely a lot of factors. This is not by any means to suggest that we don’t have our own sexual desires or needs or never do just genuinely want hook ups (or to suggest hookups are a bad thing - they can be a great way to explore). I just think it’s hard to ignore the reality that there’s this specific age demographic in terms of the women frat guys are able to get with. I’ve talked to a lot of girls post frat party hook up and they often openly admit they didn’t find the guy attractive. I always think that’s interesting because it definitely takes away from the idea of hookups as something purely sexual or self motivated.

Victoria Ortiz

vickieortiz2004 — 2023-09-29 03:50:08 UTC

Hookup culture is not as prominent here as I thought it would be, but it is still present. I’ve seen that it is common for first-years to either be in a long-distance relationship that began before college, or upperclassmen who have lived through freshman year, and are now in relationships. It is not common to see high-commitment relationships currently forming between freshmans. Many of my friends have been engaging in hookup culture, but with the same person. There is no expectation of a romantic relationship forming, but they are consistently being intimate with the same person, rather than multiple. As the article presents the notion of high-commitment relationships consuming time that could be focused on personal growth, I think this is also seen throughout college culture, as many people think they are too busy for a relationship and would prefer to engage in casual relationships. I think this has to do with wanting to have the aspect of physical intimacy, but they are nervous or uncomfortable towards the idea of being intimate with many people at once.

Another thing I have noticed is that when it comes to hook ups, many “hook ups” in high school were just making out and a little bit more every once in a while. However, here at USC, it is much more common for individuals to engage in further than making out or in sexual intercourse when hooking up the first or second time. I think as individuals get older, they do not see sex as a big deal compared to how it is seen in high school.

Sophia Cachay

scachay2 — 2023-09-29 05:13:01 UTC

The number of connections I made between this week’s content and my observations at USC seems to grow the more I think about the two. Starting with attraction, the appeal to symmetry and youth is so prevalent in the conversations I have and overhear on a daily basis. Be it in the dining hall, or a class, I find that people’s comments on attractiveness always touch on these aspects in particular. From “they have a cute baby face,” to “wow, his jawline is so so sharp,” symmetry and youth are popular appeals. Even more prevalent, is the attraction to “pride.” I’d like to hone in on one example I had this week, which was when my friend found an athlete “hot” because of the way “he confidently carried himself” as he walked into lecture. Call it pride, or confidence, I realized that it was the carelessness, almost disregard for everyone else, that my friend found attractive in him. Thus, this attraction to “pride” in “masc-presenting” people (as we discussed in class) I think is more a reflection of attraction to carelessness; reflective of someone more likely to hook up than sustain a relationship. In regards to hookups, I can say that Paula England’s research results of relationships starting from a hookup hold true, as a friend I met at USC is in this exact situation.

Sophia Cachay

scachay2 — 2023-09-29 05:14:07 UTC

Zoe Hammer

zthammer — 2023-09-29 05:14:28 UTC

I have definitely seen the topics we've discussed this week in class play out in the world around me at USC. Regarding attraction, I think specific facial features can play a key role in how an individual perceives another person. Amongst my friends, we have agreed that a good smile and nice eyes are the first traits we notice when we meet a new person that we may potentially be attracted to. In class we also discussed the value of pridefulness in terms of male attraction and how women (traditionally) have chosen to pursue men who assert a confident demeanor. In my experience, I have noticed a lot of people interested in individuals who have a noticeable presence in a room and don't just shy away from those around them. On the topic of hookup culture, I also have witnessed a lot of what we talked about in class. It's true that a lot of people in college will go to very different places to find someone to have a casual relationship with versus an extended intimate romance. I'm assuming people rarely go to the row or rely on Tinder in search of a husband... but I could be missing something.

Thomas Bittencourt

tbittenc — 2023-09-29 06:15:29 UTC

Yes I have! With regard to our discussions about attraction, I noticed a few weeks ago how my ex-roommate's new girlfriend was quite similar to him. It reminded me of how, typically, adolescents – young-adults are attracted to partners who share similar qualities to themselves. Apart from that, I wouldn't say I've encountered anything else that reminded me of class, though I do have some other observations I'd like to share. I found it interesting how the majority of responses to the "where on campus for hookups" question mentioned "the row" and other more talkative and less serious places. When juxtaposed with the answers for "where on campus for dates" we start to see how these qualities that make someone attractive correlate with where they are found. Leavey Library is much more of a social and collaborative space compared to Doheny Library which seems more serious and innerfocused. Marshall and Viterbi are different in ways we all seem to know, and Trader Joe's is a mystery to us all. What I'm getting at is that these hookup-oriented places are where people are more likely to be prideful, casual, whatever, while the date-centric places are for people who seem more goal-oriented and are focused on, again, something serious.

Fadi Kabi

kabi1 — 2023-09-29 08:52:32 UTC

I definitely see the things that we have talked about in class. I think the most common trend I've realized is people wanting casual relationships or hookups where they don't have to commit to anything. I don't really see many people attempting to get into relationships because they know how big the hookup culture is. Pretty much everyone says that they don't want anything to focus on school and their career. I feel like it is very safe to say if you end up at a party it would be easy to end up leaving with someone and "hooking up" with them. As for beauty standards, I don't think it would be much different from any other schools. I think at this point, fashion trends are more widespread and uniform everywhere because of social media.

Fin Liu

fzliu — 2023-09-29 19:08:50 UTC

I’ve definitely noticed the themes that we’ve been learning about this week reflected in interactions between students. Some people disagree on the meaning of a “hookup”. Some of my friends consider it to be just making out, and some consider it full sex. Some people also have different definitions of what they consider “sex” to be. I know of friends who have had multiple hookup partners in the past seven weeks. With midterm season in full swing, people have been a lot busier, and since they don’t have that commitment, they do not need to stress about maintaining a relationship. I know friends that have gone on dates with people that they hooked up with first. Most people, however, keep their hookups lowkey and don’t talk about it much. People sometimes seem to hook with other people because they are available and in close proximity. Some of my friends have been meeting their hookups through hanging out in groups and then spending a lot of time alone together. I’ve already noticed one case of relationship churning. There is one pair that hooks up and then decides they don’t want to anymore, but somehow keep coming back to each other. People are very confident in the way that they’ve been approaching others. They’re forward and just state what they want, and the terms of the “relationship”.

Falcon

keyufu — 2023-09-29 20:16:01 UTC

Yes, sometimes me and my friend talked about related stuff that we experienced or heard of in the first few weeks. I definitely noticed people met with each other in different type of events and sometimes they developed a closer relationship with each other. My friends participated in social events with different purposes, like some just want to have a short yet happy time and others want to establish a relatively more stable romantic relationship. Since USC is such a big school and there are plenty of opportunities available for students to take, students get different options to meet their goal. Personally, I am not very interested in the hookup culture, so I don’t normally go to those kinds of social events. I also have a friend who wants to find a partner and uses different ways to get closer to people. In general, I found most of my friends are quite satisfying with their current way and they are quite happy about the ongoing thing. However, some of them were impacted by the peer pressure on this type of thing and were forced to change their social interaction ways. For me, I believe that no matter what we really choose to socially interact with people, it is enough as long as we are satisfied and happy.

Michael Blasi

mblasi5 — 2023-09-29 23:55:49 UTC

After spending many weeks here at USC, I can confirm that hookup culture is extremely widespread, and perhaps even a topic that can be boasted among students. Being a man in college and having many male friends in college, it is almost seen as a status point among peers to boast hookup culture-related success like having a high "body count" or finding a partner to hook up with at a party on a Friday night. As a result, the ones who generally find success with these things end up with a higher status among their male counterparts when compared to the ones who don’t. Therefore, males with attractive features seemingly rise to the top of the social hierarchy because of the success they find within these encounters. Additionally, as someone who had pledged a fraternity on campus, finding a partner at the party for the evening seemed to be of very high importance among my fellow pledge brothers, making it something of a cultural norm among ourselves. Therefore, through these experiences, I can deduce the widespread activity that hookup culture plays in our college lives.

Aadya Nijhawan

2023-09-29 23:56:36 UTC

After spending more than a month at USC, I have definitely seen the trend of hookup culture between many students. More often among boys, they usually look for hookups at frat parties. They usually look for the main facial traits among partners. Students only want casual and are not looking for something serious. On the other hand, there are some students who entered college already committed. They are in long distance relationships and keep away from hookup cultures. They feel isolated during frats because they try to stay loyal to their partners. Their partners even try to keep them away from such parties because of their insecurities. The last section of students , very small in number, are looking for something serious. They do not feel ready for something casual and feel that something serious would be more suitable for them. My friend is in a long distance relationship and she is struggling a lot. She wants to stay committed to her boyfriend but feels too controlled. Her boyfriend feels very insecure about the most little things and tries to keep her away from most things. This restriction makes her feel frustrated.

Orr Bar-Yossef

baryosse — 2023-09-30 00:24:05 UTC

I have definitely seen the topics we discussed this week reflected in the interactions between students here. As expected, I have found hookup culture is very prevalent; especially at frat parties. It’s common to see people hooking up at these parties, which makes sense considering these parties are an environment where many people come with the intention of socializing and meeting new people. I have also noticed that these frats control the ratio of girls to guys at the parties (by not letting guys who are not associated with the frat in) in order to make it easy for the guys to find girls to hook up with. At one of these parties, I overheard a group of frat guys comparing the number of girls they each kissed that night. This ties into the idea of sexual double standard that we learned about in class. Girls are often judged and criticized (even by their own friends) for casually hooking up with guys at these parties, while the guys are praised and encouraged to hook up with as many girls as possible. The ideas we learned about attraction also often apply in these situations. I’ve noticed girls often want to hook up with frat guys even if they don’t find them physically attractive. This ties into the idea that women find prideful men and status attractive. Overall, I think that despite the fact hookup culture is very widespread in college, there are still many people who look for deeper connections/relationships.

Tyler Gevas

2023-09-30 01:04:19 UTC

Oh I have witness quite a lot of people participating in hookup culture here at USC. Me personally I am in a long distant relationship so I do not participate but a lot of my pals here do and I am oh so fortunate to hear their crazy stories (lmao).
Most of these hookups happen at a frat house during a frat party. Me and my guy friends struggle to get into a frat because they only allow girls unless you “know a brother”. The reason frats do this is to cut off competition and have all the ladies to themselves. I do find this a little unsettling, especially from someone who doesnt even want to partake in hooking up just wanting to have fun with friends. It seems that people are rather “desperate” at frat parties to make out with someone. My friend told me they made out with this girl and I asked him if he found her pretty and he said “honestly not really I was just tryna make out with someone. You know man?” No I don’t. Because USC is one of the biggest party schools in the country, I believe that also results in usc students being heavily involved in hookup culture. It’s all fun and games until you walk in on your suitemate :l

Nicole Leihe

2023-09-30 01:11:11 UTC

Absolutely, yes. In just my first 2-3 weeks at USC, I immediately noticed the prevalence of hookup culture even outside of parties. Some of the friends I've made have already engaged in multiple hookups - some that only happened once, and others that were consistent for a little bit and then ended. I definitely see how hookup culture has been normalized among college students throughout the years, as mentioned in Hamilton and Armstrong's article. Hookup culture has become something so ingrained in USC campus culture, that some might even consider it weird to not partake in it. Just 3 weeks into being on campus, someone asked me why I hadn't chosen to hook up with someone yet, and used my looks and attraction as a way to justify why I should have already. Although I believe they meant it as a compliment, I find it interesting how hookups are just something that are assumed and expected by most people on campus. In Hamilton and Armstrong's research, they also mentioned many times about how the women they interviewed felt like they were shamed more for participating in hookup culture as compared to men that participate in hookup culture. I've definitely seen this trend occur at USC already - after a somewhat "controversial" hookup happened amongst some of my friends, the woman was the one that was shunned and cast out of the friend group, while the man was treated like normal and continued to be a praised member of the group.

Sage Shimabukuro

2023-09-30 02:48:35 UTC

After being here for 7 weeks I have seen a vast amount of hook-up culture popular among young adults. Many of my girlfriends find Frat Guys really attractive but they don't want to start a relationship. This is also true for most of my guy friends. I think that this is especially interesting since we learned about how some view the emerging adult group as being turbulent, and much of what I have seen has represented that. I think that this hook-up culture is influenced by the evolution of feminism and the breakdown of traditional norms surrounding dating apps and relationships. As society becomes more progressive, there's a growing emphasis on individual freedom in making choices about one's body and relationships. In addition to the hookup culture I've seen at school, another interesting thing is seeing who people are attracted to. After learning about the three things that people find attractive I've been paying attention to what my friends look for in a significant other vs. a "hook up". A lot of people have "lower" standards for someone they want to hook up with vs. someone they want to date.

suedesan — 2023-09-30 03:16:09 UTC

Prior to coming to USC, and contemplating college life in general, I held a preconceived notion closely tied to the concept of college hookup culture. The media, including television, often perpetuates a narrative that centers around brief, emotionally detached relationships as the predominant aspect of the college experience. As someone who has been in a long term relationship this image scared me a lot, but since being at USC I have been pleasantly surprised. While I haven't observed an overwhelming prevalence of casual hookups, I have noticed that conversations among students often revolve around this subject. I think as a society we have been classically conditioned to determine our enjoyment during the nights we go out on the male validation we receive. A lot of my friends here have talked down on themselves simply because they haven't been approached by males at the events we go to. I think this need for validation stems from the way college life is displayed in the media and the stigma behind needing to hookup. As a society, we need to keep our standards high as everyone is deserving of true affection and lasting connections. There is no need to rush directly into a relationship, and there is nothing wrong with taking your own path at your own pace.

Georgia Klass

GeorgiaKlass — 2023-09-30 05:53:51 UTC

Hookup culture encapsulates one’s desire to indulge in a “physically intimate” hangout without any desire to make a true commitment, according to Paula England, a sociologist at Stanford University. After being at USC for approximately seven weeks now, I have noticed that hook up culture is more prevalent than ever before. Many individuals have recently broken up with their significant others to move away from home and, more specifically, each other. With many people just getting over a break up, exploring their sexuality, trying to get good grades, and more, it is challenging for people to make such a time-consuming commitment to another individual. Therefore, a quick and meaningless hookup often may seem like the best and most convenient way to have some form of intimacy with another person to fill sexual or emotional desires.

Furthermore, I have recognized many stereotypes for “attractiveness” at USC. As we discussed in class, people tend to find women that are happy more attractive in comparison to women that do not appear to be happy. This has proven to be true from my experience as friendly and approachable girls that seem happy to the public eye often will attract the most individuals. Additionally, we discussed that prideful men are considered more attractive for individuals that present a masculine profile. When I have been alongside male figures specifically, I have noticed that the more egotistical men tend to have an easier time and a better experience interacting with girls and other individuals of interest. Although this is true most of the time, it is not always the case. Sometimes individuals will find these prideful men to be irritating and full of themselves, thus creating an opposing effect.

Miles Linde

mlinde5 — 2023-09-30 17:30:45 UTC

I have definitely seen plenty of the different things we’ve learned about this week presented around me since I’ve been here. In a dorm room of eight guys, all single but me, people are commonly “sexiled” by their roommates to join us in another room. I’ve seen one friend of mine “hook up” (by the definition of physical intimacy, not sex) with at least three different girls since we started living here, and when asked about it, he claims there is nothing serious with any of them. That being said, there is also one girl who has been over on multiple occasions, adding an interesting layer to the equation. It seems as if he has one girl with whom he has a deeper emotional connection (and that comes with the time that such a thing would occupy), yet he also has other intimate relationships. It seems counter to what we learned about females enjoying hookup culture for the time efficiency of it, given he spends both the time on the relationship that means more and other entirely physical relationships. Regardless, I find most of the stuff we’re learning surprisingly true - college kids do seem to love to hook up - I just don’t think its perceived efficiency is accurate at all, being in a relationship that definitely takes less time than some of my friends spend courting potential hookups on apps like Tinder.

Parker Taylor

parkerta3 — 2023-09-30 20:49:42 UTC

Although I haven’t seen too much of active hookup culture yet here at USC, throughout my eight weeks here I have been witness to a few instances that exemplify how attraction can be pursued and lost. For example, only a short time into being here when I was still at band camp, two people in my section started going out after only knowing each other for a bit more than a week, and they broke things off shortly after because the relationship was moving too fast. I found this very indicative of the sort of mindset that some people may have coming into a school like this which is known for its hookup culture and quick relationships, and how these preconceived notions of who to be and how to date at a school like this can fall apart in practice. Coming into a school such as USC can result in some people feeling intrinsic motivation or pressure to play into a sort of social role and attempt to become someone who, if they weren’t already, likes things such as partying and is interested in quick relationships and hooking up. This is sort of reminiscent of the dramatistic theory we discussed in class where your perception of certain social environments and those around you will cause you to take on a role of sorts to best assimilate to the environment you’re in.

Hannah Poulter

2023-10-02 22:27:41 UTC

From conversations that I have had with people, or ones that I have been involved in with some of my friends, I think that it’s evident there are certainly some gender differences in the ways that hookups are viewed by men and women at USC. In conversations regarding hookups and ‘one-night-stands’ that people have been a part of, it’s been a common theme that men have been more boastful of the women they’ve been with when describing their appearance. They’ve described their pride in hooking up with the most attractive girls, and have expressed distain at the ‘less attractive’ girls that their friends have hooked up with. Unfortunately, I believe that looks are a very common topic for men when discussing their sexual partners and I have heard little regarding these girls’ personality traits, interests etc. On the other hand, when talking to my female friends about their experiences with the hookup culture at USC, there seems to be a much more emotional undertone to their stories. They’re much more inclined to describe how they felt about the person’s kindness, generosity etc. (or lack of) before going on to detail their appearance. I feel as though this theme may be common throughout many universities, with young men and women appearing to be very different in their storytelling of their hookups.

This week, we've talked about different theories about the shifts in marriage over time (Inst. -> Comp. -> Indiv, When Love Conquered Marriage, Deinstitutionalization). In what directions or trends do you think will marriage go in the future, demographically and ideationally?

eshimada1 — 2023-10-09 18:12:55 UTC

Caroline Mikes

2023-10-10 06:32:26 UTC

I think the institution of marriage will continue to exist but as it has in the past decades, continue to move away from conformist guidelines. As we keep on shifting away from the bread maker/homemaker model, marriages will become more egalitarian, a trend that, as discussed in the reading, should hopefully make both women and men happier. I think we’ll continue to see more variety in marriages, especially LGBTQ couples and interracial couples. Such changes will have major effects on society and I believe we are only in the beginning. While of course, such relationships create unique struggles, I hope that they will also contribute to a more tolerant society. I’m curious to see what the population will look like in 100 years, if people will continue to gravitate towards others of their background, or if now that society is more open, we’ll see an increasingly mixed population. And if so, how will the way we think about identity, pass on culture, etc. change because of this shift? I’m also curious to see what kinds of new relationships will emerge. I think we will eventually see greater acceptance of polyamorous unions, for example. Finally, I think we’ll see further disintegration of “the nuclear family” through greater separation between parenthood and marriage. With increasing climate crises and the nature of our economy, I think more and more married couples will choose not to have children, and it’ll become less of a given. At the same time, however, limitations on birth control access and abortion (especially for poor women) will increase unplanned pregnancies. Perhaps, we will see greater class divergence among those who have children, in which the wealthiest, who want and are able to afford kids, choose to have them, and the poorest without access to birth control end up with kids as well, while middle class married couples may decrease in childbearing as desires shift and parenthood becomes less affordable for a middle class income.

Dor Peretz

peretzdor1 — 2023-10-11 20:35:30 UTC

Demographically, I think the trend in marriage will be that the rates of marriages will go down, while the rate of long-term cohabiting couples (in regards to the idea of cohabitation as a substitution for marriage) will go up. Additionally, I predict that of couples that do get married, the proportion of middle and upper class couples within that will go down as the institution of marriage becomes less and less associated with establishing the financial or high social status of a couple. I think the amount of lower income couples getting married will stay relatively the same, because lower income families up to now seem to generally not be motivated to marry for financial or social status, but rather for more practical reasons or to consummate their love for each other, which are factors I don’t think will change much. However, because I predict other classes to marry less, accordingly, lower income marriages will probably make up a higher proportion of all marriages. I think demographically there will also be more interracial marriages and multicultural families as ideationally we as a society move away from the biases against multiculturalism. Ideationally, I think the main future change with regards to marriage is that people will view it as less of a crucial step before cohabitation, before having kids, and in general, as marriage becomes less associated with establishing the legitimacy of a couple’s relationship, and more just an added step if couples want to celebrate their love with a wedding.

Joan Song

joansong1 — 2023-10-11 22:09:58 UTC

I believe that the concept of marriage will shift more rapidly than we think, as it has over the last few decades. Regarding socio-economic class (SES), I think the marriage trend would decrease, at least at a "young" age, for couples who earn relatively higher incomes. This might be due to them wanting their lives to be more career-based and self-established, especially in this society, thus also resulting in a lower divorce rate. I also think the marriage trend would decrease for couples with lower incomes since they are more likely to cohabitate (either because of financial convenience, companionship, etc.) and then end up separating as many couples do; one possible issue that might arise from this is having children before marriage, which results in unstable families for the children. Overall, if the trend followed the current trend, I think people would think twice about marriage as time progresses, either because of their education and careers, rise in cohabitation, desire for gender equality, and many other reasons (of course, there could be many individuals who seek traditional marriage). I think it's already interesting how the age of people wanting to get married has continued to increase.

Bridget Wang

bmwang1 — 2023-10-11 23:38:57 UTC

I think that marriages will continue to be deinstitutionalized but still hold a significant meaning in the future. Because cohabitation has become a more popular substitute for marriage in recent years, I feel like it would be a simple assumption to think that it will continue to be a pathway that people choose instead of marriage, and I think the more the population of couples that cohabitate grows, the less pressure there will be to marry for those who want to get married but can’t because of financial reasons. The influence of cohabitation on marriages would become a cycle: as cohabitation becomes a more equal option to marriage, the amount of marriages will decrease, and in turn, more people will turn to cohabitation because they no longer see marriage as a necessity to prove their life progress. However, contrary to this belief, the meaning of marriage and the importance of marriage in society has always had a significant effect on how people interpret love and relationships, and I, personally, would find it really weird and difficult to completely get rid of marriage as an option in the future. I think cohabitation will still increase as time goes on, but I can’t see marriage disappearing from the possible options of relationship dynamics.

Julia Kirsh

jkirsh4 — 2023-10-12 04:39:25 UTC

I think that in the future, marriage rates are going to decrease while rates of cohabitation as a result of long term relationships will increase. As different dating forms begin to emerge, the dating market and relationship dynamics have begun to change. Marriage now is seen more as an institutionalized way of expressing love and many couples don’t feel as though they need to get married purely to show others that they love each other and can afford to have a wedding. As the economy and different aspects of society begin to shift, marriage becomes less and less attainable and furthermore, less wanted. The stereotypical love that is seen in old movies is much less likely to occur in modern day and marriage is becoming seen as less and less of an end goal for couples. Rates of children outside of marriage have been steadily increasing, proving that a family can be started outside of marriage. It is important to remember that the shift from in person to the digital world has also led to many more long distance relationships, where marriage is almost unreasonable. As mentioned before, it is a large financial burden on couples to host a wedding and to some, the purpose seems less geared to sharing their love and more geared to showing others that they are financially stable enough to have a wedding. To some, they would rather their money go to different aspects of nurturing their relationships. I do still think that love exists in society and that marriages are still going to occur, but not at the same rapid rate as they have in the past.

Nicole Leihe

2023-10-12 22:47:11 UTC

I think marriage will continue to be further deinstitutionalized and that demographically, we'll see a decline in marriage rates. Especially in our current political climate where people are beginning to be less trusting of our government, I think many couples may choose to not marry in order to keep their relationship private without "government interference". In particular, I think this would apply to couples that have historically been undermined, such as interracial and LGBTQ+ couples. Ideationally, I think that marriages that do occur in the future will still serve as symbolic & demonstrative actions, particularly of wealth and financial stability. I think marriage won't be as strong of a symbol of commitment, as the rise of cohabitating relationships will likely rise to a point where their commitment is seen in almost a similar regard to the commitment of marriage. However, in a world where the richer are becoming richer and more money is being fueled into the economy overall, I can definitely see marriages being increasingly used as a symbol of wealth. These days, it can be seen that the gap between cohabitation and marriage is starting to close - the largest difference between the two is really the status symbol that marriages hold. As such, the implied privileges behind marriage will begin to take on less meaning and carry less weight among couples.

Thompson Phan

thompsonphan — 2023-10-12 23:17:04 UTC

Marriage is continue to exist, but I believe that couples' desire for marriage will decrease. Statistics show that the age for marriage increased over the years so I don't think it would come as a surprise if it continues to increase and most people lose the desire to marry. It could also be a toss up due to states permitting and prohibiting same-sex marriage, the debate of the decade.

Sophia Cachay

scachay2 — 2023-10-13 02:59:38 UTC

Demographically, I believe the current trends of marriage delay will persist. Like others have mentioned, this is mainly rooted in the increasing popularity of cohabitation, as a replacement for marriage, along with the growing stress on self-fulfillment and prioritization before committing to marriage. However, among the established marriages, I predict that there will be a continuous increase in interracial marriages, as well as ones that intertwine different socioeconomic statuses. So ideationally, we will see the continuing of diverse marriages. Given that we live in a world more tolerable than the early 20th century, I believe that another ideational change will be the further deinstitutionalization of marriage. For example, the once rigid gender stricts attached to each partner in marriage will continue to wane as more married couples challenge the roles. However, with the prevalence of social media and subsequent materialistic lense many people foster today, I think that the general significance of marriage will stay solidified. In other words, though cohabitation may be dwindling the number of marriages occurring, marriage itself will still hold its value of status, wealth, and stability in today’s society.

Kasandra Santiago

kasandra17 — 2023-10-13 18:03:07 UTC

Demographically, I believe that the amount of marriages will go down as time proceeds, I believe that the norms people hold are changing and marriage isn’t falling into the main priority category of their lives any more. I think that with time people are putting their own personal stability over this idea of the perfect romantic relationship. Therefore, I think that cohabitation will increase because people want to find their own personal stability before marriage and cohabitation is a good way of knowing if your partner will disrupt your stability. I think that there will be a lot more cohabitation in low income communities as they can pool income saving money for both of them until they save enough to have their dream wedding or their ideal life. In higher income communities I think the reason marriage rates could be delayed is because norms of independence are more normalized and people are starting to appreciate being alone more and more throughout time. Looking at all of these things is very interesting as looking back people would dream of the perfect marriage and of the homemaker breadwinner ideal and now norms are so different and just keep getting different with time so I think that is why marriage rates will go down.

Fadi Kabi

kabi1 — 2023-10-13 19:11:00 UTC

I think that the current marriage trends we are seeing right now are going to remain relatively the same as time moves on. I think this is mainly because we see more people striving for higher goals and economic independence than we did before, and that is only going to keep increasing. I do think that people in lower SES groups might still maintain higher levels of marriage than those in higher SES groups, but I think the trend of lower levels of marriage will be universal across the board. Another thing is that I could potentially see people being discouraged from marriage because of the high divorce rates that we are currently seeing. I've heard plenty of times people saying that they do not want to get married because, odds are, that they are going to get divorced. I think that a significantly large group of people are going to prefer cohabiting and getting married away from the government (maybe just religiously) tham getting legally married.

Zoe Hammer

zthammer — 2023-10-13 19:44:40 UTC

I think moving forward marriage will continue to become something that is not expected of most couples as they move into a committed relationship. While it used to be a stepping stone for a “successful” relationship, security, and a family, modern society has branched off from this notion. Therefore, we may notice the rate of marriage among couples continues to decrease as time goes on. Furthermore, society is increasingly recognizing and embracing diverse forms of partnerships, including same-sex marriages and non-binary relationships, reflecting a more inclusive and accepting perspective. Additionally, the ideological emphasis on gender roles within marriage is shifting away from the breadwinner/homemaker model and towards greater equality, with both partners sharing responsibilities and decision-making. We are also witnessing a decline in the overall rate of marriage as more people prioritize individual pursuits and delay marriage until later in life. As we have discussed in class, there has been an increase in non-traditional partnership arrangements including cohabitation and single parenthood, reflecting changing societal norms. Furthermore, marriage is increasingly characterized by cultural and ethnic diversity, as global migration patterns and increased intercultural relationships lead to a more heterogeneous demographic landscape.

Sage Shimabukuro

2023-10-13 22:14:00 UTC

I think that the future of marriage is very fluid and will shift both in demographics and ideations. Demographically, research shows that there is a shift towards delaying marriage and a greater tolerance for different forms of relationships. There are new factors that are being weighed in when thinking about marriage. For example, there is a greater emphasis on self-fulfillment in marriages now that was not present in marriages in the past. I think that going into the future this trend will continue. Ideationally, marriage is continuing to be redefined in order to emphasize the compassion and love shared between two people in a marital union. Traditional roles in marriages have also been redefined and things have become much more egalitarian in relationships. Another factor to put into consideration is technology, and how it has increased the diversity of relationship types. The future of marriage appears to embrace flexibility, inclusivity, and a focus on mutual growth and happiness within partnerships.

melody wu

wumelody1 — 2023-10-14 00:00:49 UTC

I think marriage is experiencing a transition as conventional marriage rates decrease while marriage rates increase. Societal developments such as shifting social conventions, cohabitation preferences, and the deferral of marriage to seek higher education and solid professions all contribute to this trend. Individuals are marrying at an older age, allowing for personal development and achievement of milestones prior to marriage. Cohabitation is seen as a practical and adaptable method to companionship. These modifications reflect the changing idea of marriage and current relationship dynamics.

Michael Blasi

2023-10-14 00:14:08 UTC

Demographically, I believe marriage rates will continue to decline and people will instead opt to cohabit together instead of pursuing matrimony. Therefore, people may choose to marry much later in their lives when compared to nowadays, or perhaps not even at all. As a result, I can see an increase in non-traditional family structures, seeing that couples will simply cohabit instead of investing themselves into a formal marriage. Ideationally, I think that there will be a continued shift towards more egalitarian and flexible partnerships. Seeing how traditional gender roles have continued to evolve over the past few decades, it wouldn’t surprise me if the trend continued to persist further. Therefore, I would predict that more people will continue to seek marriage based on shared values and personal growth as opposed to practical or societal reasons. While this trend has nowadays become the norm, I would assume that those who don’t typically abide by such norms may have a change of heart toward the standard. Even in the past 10 years, marriage and marital norms have changed so much due to advancements in technology and a pivot in societal attitudes toward the way we approach relationships, so it will be interesting to see how these predictions play out and how relationship norms may or may not change in the near future.

Fin Liu

fzliu — 2023-10-14 00:36:07 UTC

Rates of cohabitation have been on the rise, and will continue to increase. Following this trend, the rates of marriage will likely decrease as well. Both ends of the SES spectrum have been getting married less. Marriage is very much an economic thing. Marriage comes with the expectation of a wedding. Weddings are expensive, and many people don’t want to pay for all of the parts involved. Higher SES have been waiting later and later to get married, and lower SES have not been getting married at all(Goldstein 2001). Marriage is a legal binding, and with growing distrust in the government by today’s youth, that might discourage people from getting married. Marriage has a lot of negativity surrounding it, especially from the older generations. Baby Boomers and Generation X constantly joke that they “hate their partners” and call it a “ball and chain”. One starts to wonder why people would even get married in the first place. Marriage is a symbol, and has so much pressure and financial implications and agreements associated with it. Marriage is a status of wealth and stability. It has been deinstitutionalized, and it’s now up to couples what they want to do with defining their marriage.

Katie Youn

2023-10-14 02:19:26 UTC

I think marriage will continue to be a symbol of love and commitment, if not become further established as that symbol. From what I’ve seen from the media and from my social circle, younger generations really seem to uphold marriage as the ultimate level of commitment to a romantic partner. However, as different forms of social unions develop (such as cohabitation), marriage may become just one form of how two people can express their love and commitment to each other. The younger generation seems to recognize this and is rejecting the ideologies that have shaped marriage for centuries. Even wedding traditions are starting to become more individualized. Rings are starting to become more unique as Gen Z rejects the diamond industry. I’ve seen more and more trends of these “unique” wedding ideas on social media, which I think ties into the fact that marriage as an institution is becoming increasingly personal.

Interracial and gay marriage seems like it will continue to increase as society becomes more accepting. The legalization of these two types of marriages already changed the way marriage is viewed in the eyes of the law since it established the idea that marriage is a fundamental, individual right. This may also reinforce the same idea but through a social lens rather than a legal one. For example, I’ve seen many videos online where both people in a gay relationship accidentally propose to each other. Although this is a cute, wholesome example, it introduces a question of gender roles: what happens when there is no “man in the relationship” to propose?

Orr Bar-Yossef

baryosse — 2023-10-14 02:41:15 UTC

I believe that the views around marriage will continue to evolve and change over the upcoming years. Several trends may emerge/strengthen as a result. First, I believe that more couples will choose to delay marriage in order to pursue their education/career goals. Many couples may choose to not marry at all, and marriage rates will decline as a result. In previous decades, marriage was viewed as a necessary step couples must take before having children or moving in together. Over the next decades, marriage will be seen as more of a personal choice than a societal expectation. This means more and more couples will likely build a family/cohabit without getting married first and might give up marriage all together; as it is no longer viewed as a necessary step. More people may also choose to be single rather than in a relationship. Additionally, I believe we will see more diversity within marriages. As same-sex marriage is becoming more widely accepted, we may start to see an increase in LGBTQ+ marriages. We may also see an increase in non-monogamous and polyamorous relationships. Interracial marriages and marriages between people who are in different SES groups will also likely become more common. As society’s attitude toward marriage, gender roles, and family structure evolves, more diverse forms of partnerships will likely emerge.

Hannah Poulter

2023-10-14 03:24:54 UTC

In terms of demographically, I believe that there will be a decrease in the number of people who are getting married. I think this because I think the emphasis on marriage has very much decreased over the last few decades with many more people viewing it as a pro rather than their main goal as they become adults. I believe as more people with liberal views on marriage, raising children and cohabitation replace older, more traditional people, the way in which society operates around marriage will change also. With the steady increase in cohabitation that is occurring currently, I think that people see less of a need to be married and are satisfied with cohabitation and sharing their life with their partner in that way, less concerned about the labels. Despite these potential trends, I do believe that people will still view marriage as something they would like to have happen for them in their life. Although people may not view it as one of their biggest accomplishments as previous, I think there is definitely likely to be importance and meaning still attached to it. I think people crave romance and fairlytale-esque stories and marriage is still largely considered a very special, romantic occasion which people will certainly want to include in their lives with their partner.

Tyler Gevas

2023-10-14 03:56:00 UTC

I believe the demographic of marriage will actually go down and cohabitation short term and long term will increase. Over the past few decades we have seen a quite substantial growth of cohabiting of couples and a decline of marriage. A reason being that cohabitation has become more socially accepted and normalized with couples. Marriage has always been a societal norm but we have seen a slight decline in it because of couples committing to long term cohabitating and just not marrying at all. A lot has changed in the past decades dealing with the idea of love, romance, and marriage. Deinstitutionalization has rapidly increased in beliefs of many. Deinstitutionalization is society creating norms for marriage that go against institutionalized marriage and the ideas of love back then. This leads to the increase in other forms of marriage like individualized and companionate. Involving more romance and true love rather than situation, financial reasons, and familial status. I do believe that the trends of both of these demographics will continue to grow and follow their trends and possibly at a faster rate.

Georgia Klass

GeorgiaKlass — 2023-10-14 04:20:30 UTC

I believe that marriage will continue to move away from the breadwinner-homemaker model that was prevalent in the early 1900s to the mid 1900s during the time of companionate marriage. As marriage moves away from this outdated model, it will become more egalitarian. Our society as a whole has already moved towards more egalitarian marriages as a result of the inability to support an entire household on just one income among other reasons. Based on the upward trend of egalitarian marriages, as more women continue to participate in higher education and payment becomes more equal between men, women, etc., this trend will continue to go up.

Furthermore, as societal pressures on individuals to conform to the structures of past relationships weaken, marriages will become more diverse. This means that there will likely be a greater proportion of LGBTQ+ marriages, interracial marriages, marriages between individuals of different SES, and more. However, marriages will likely only continue to diversify in certain countries and, more specifically, cities as some areas continue to maintain past beliefs surrounding marriage and relationships. For example, in some areas of East Africa, same-sex marriages still remain illegal, while that law was overturned in many North American countries in the early 2000s (approximately).

In present-day society, marriage maintains a greater focus on the fulfillment that each partner experiences with respect to their relationship. As discussed in class, the “norms and social scripts'' that had once been so important in relationships and marriages have been suppressed. Since marriage has become more deinstitutionalized, people don’t feel as pressured to commit to another person through the act of marriage and they feel more freedom within a marriage.

Jada Griffiths

jadagrif — 2023-10-14 05:38:44 UTC

As previously discussed in class love is constantly changing and involving. Therefore, as love consistently changes and evolves marriages between two people will also. As shown through previous trends marriage in the past was very traditional, marriages were typically man and wife married categorized under the same race, living with one another and both playing their stereotypical gender roles. However, as time progresses we have seen an increase in diversity (economically, socially, racially, and sexually) in marriages. Therefore, it is safe to assume that marriages between people will continue to be diverse as societal norms evolve and change to adapt to the different new standards of love. The increased awareness of sexual orientations, genders, backgrounds, and economic standings are all large contributing factors to the changing dynamics of the modern world. People are increasingly choosing to marry later in life and prioritizing personal and professional goals thus demonstrating more independence and individuality within most people. Leading to people seeking relationships based on mutual love and respect rather than tradition or societal pressure. The symbolism of marriage is also revolutionizing. While it once primarily represented a social and economic contract, it's moving increasingly toward a celebration of love, partnership, and commitment. Overall the shift between institutional and compainate marriage will increase as time progresses and things evolve.

Aadya Nijhawan

2023-10-14 06:18:08 UTC

Marriage is influenced by different cultural, economic, societal and personal factors. There are demographic and ideational trends that continue to emerge and shape marriage in the future:

Delayed marriage: Individuals are delaying marriage for reasons such as higher education, financial stability etc. Unlike previous generations, marriage is continuing to be delayed.

Cohabitation: Cohabitation as a percussor to marriage or substitute to marriage has become a trend. This trend may continue to be on a rise as people cohabit as a way to test their compatibility as well as for economic reasons.

Declining marriage rates: marriage rates have started to decline in some parts of the world. Changing social norms, economic uncertainty contribute to decline in marriage.

Same sex marriage: Acceptance and legalization of same sex marriage have become popular in most countries.

Non-traditional forms of marriage: Polyamory and open marriages have started to gain more acceptance in society.

Changing gender roles: the dynamics of marriage will continue to change and evolve as gender roles change. More equitable sharing of responsibilities is expected including childcare and household duties.

Technological changes: Technological changes will change the way people interact and maintain relationships. Online dating, communication through social media is changing the peoples outlook towards marriage.

Thomas Bittencourt

tbittenc — 2023-10-14 06:40:51 UTC

I have a feeling that ideationally, marriage will eventually become obsolete. By that, I mean it will become fully deinstitutionalized and the majority of committed relationships will simply forgo marriage. Part of me loves the tradition of it and the significance marriage has in my religion, but it's interesting how governments have significantly pushed people to get married. It should be no one's business who you are in a long term committed relationship with, not even the government. Plus while marriage may give a sense of security to the relationship, it can also feel confining I think. As for demographically, I think this trend of more interracial and such marriages will continue which is great! I feel that with an increase in the mix of different types of marriages, that diversity will help others feel more included and confident in their lives together. So we seems to be headed in an overall progressive path which is pretty sweet.

Parker Taylor

parkerta3 — 2023-10-16 07:09:12 UTC

I think that as society continues to get more diverse in regards to peoples’ individualistic viewpoints of marriage and as societal conventions and norms shift to become more broad and flexible when it comes to how a couple is expected to exist, marriage rates will likely decrease as time goes on. I think this could also lead to a decrease in divorce rates as getting married is becoming increasingly more of an active choice couples decide to make rather than a conventional default stage of a couples’ relationship. However, the decrease in marriage rates may not be completely linear as even though the concept of marriage as a societal convention may be loosening, there are still as mentioned in class very large and multifaceted industries that thrive off of weddings such as rings, floral arrangements, certain venues, bridal dresses, and media/TV productions centered around the tradition that are systemically ingrained and likely won’t give up a major source of profit so easily. This could, perhaps, be part of the motivation behind so many marriage-centric reality TV shows popping up in recent years as the industries that have built empires and profited so heavily off of marriage for so long fight back against its fading societal importance. It is in these businesses’ best interests that marriage rates are high, and it is interesting to see the discourse between the younger generation’s stereotypical apathy and cynicism towards marriage and the programs’ attempts to reignite the excitement, passion, and allure behind the marriage process.

Zelizer's (2000) article argues that all of our intimate interactions involve relational work, and are "marked by distinctive money transfers". Because Zelizer's article was written before the rise of social media, provide your insights on her argument in the new digital era. Do you think that social media and online dating deepens or lessens the deep link between love and money?

eshimada1 — 2023-10-16 16:26:12 UTC

Victoria Ortiz

vickieortiz2004 — 2023-10-16 19:20:35 UTC

As the marriage sector slowly deviates from religious ideologies, I think that marriage will become more popular than it is now. Demographically, marriage will continue trending downwards and then will spike upwards and stabilize within the next thirty years. Right now, many people are steering away from marriage because historically, marriage has been commonly associated with conservatism. We will keep seeing an increase of interracial, homosexual, and interfaith marriages as they continue becoming more socially acceptable. While this will continue to rise, so will the age of people who get married. As more women are pursuing higher-level education, they are delaying marriage until they have graduated and have a stable career. In pursuance of egalitarian values and financial security, women are not completely rejecting marriage, but prioritizing themselves over marriage.

Ideationally, there have been many changes leaning towards the acceptance of different forms of family, such as cohabitation and having children outside of marriage. Marriage will no longer be seen as a requirement to have children or as “proof” of love, but still will be seen as a symbol of love and commitment. I don’t see society ever not considering marriage as a normal milestone in a relationship, however it will not have the same meaning as it has had historically. Now, people can choose if they want to get married. Before, it was expected for individuals to get married.

Chloe Christner

2023-10-16 22:49:17 UTC

Its hard to predict what direction marriage will go in in the future. I read the “Deinstitutionalization of American Marriage” reading. It explained that trends like cohabitation and same-sex marriage is making marriage less institutionalized. We have seen that marriage has changed drastically over time. It has gone from institutional to companion to individualized. People are deciding to get married later. Also, some people are choosing to cohabitate instead of get married. All of these trends point to the deinstitutionalization of marriage. However, the article says that marriage rates havent gone down. People still value marriage and want to get married. This is what confuses me. I don’t know if marriage will ever become less prevalent. I think cohabitation will continue to increase and people will continue to get married later. However, I think marriage will stick around. I think people will still eventually get married. Except marriage will be less cookie cutter and will be different than before.

Hannah Poulter

2023-10-17 01:32:19 UTC

In one aspect, I believe that social media may strengthen the link between love and money. Social media is increasingly becoming a medium in which people show off their extravagance and I do believe that some people may choose to date someone who can provide sufficient funds for them to live a lifestyle that they can flaunt on sites such as instagram. Furthermore, on social media sites where videos are posted, such as instagram and TikTok, it seems to me as though videos promoting expensive lifestyles are becoming increasingly popular, with people watching them for entertainment and then wishing that they could attain the same lifestyle. In the case of online dating, there is also a possibility that the link between money and love is strengthened. This is because there is generally only superficial information for people to consume on dating apps with which they decide to swipe left or right. For this reason, if someone looks as though they live a lavish lifestyle and has a lot of money, it may be an attractive feature that would cause someone to go on a date with them. With the absence of knowing a persons true personality, a person with more money may be initially more attractive than perhaps someone who doest look as though they have as much.

Mei Higashi

mjhigash — 2023-10-17 03:35:42 UTC

I think that online dating definitely deepens the link between love and money, especially in terms of the role of a provider in a relationship. Now that social media has been introduced in the world, we see more of a merge between digital and physical worlds - for example, couples can be connected by their text messages and calls but still will interact in person and go on dates, outings, etc. In this way, interactions are not always completely online. There have been a ton of online trends about “texts between my girlfriend and I” or “things that my boyfriend has ordered for me online,” showing that young adults in relationships seem to hold a lot of value in the interactions they have online. Quite honestly, this also reveals a performative element in relationships - texts started off as private, and not for the public to know, but now they are utilized on social media for reactions. On the other hand, having relationships online has become very common, though affixed to many taboo’s. To say you have a virtual girlfriend or boyfriend happens more often than not, and emotional ties in these instances could be more intense due to the nature of romanticizing. These relationships can even come in the form of one-sided affection, something I have experienced, unfortunately. Mysterious users online have sent me $1,000 through Zelle, Paypal and Venmo with the simple goal of gifting me an item; I would assume that these things are gifted with the hope of being virtually “noticed” or called out.

Mei Higashi

mjhigash — 2023-10-17 04:34:15 UTC

I think marriage will continue to decrease in popularity as more and more young adults form the belief that marriage is more of a mindset than anything. Marriage seems to be becoming more of a mental construct that we form in relationships in order to build foundations of trust and respect, and the legal ties and bounds of marriage. Demographically, I feel like the trend of cohabiting couples, implying couples who are neither married or necessarily have children, will increase. Living together prior to marriage is already a trend that is prevalent in the generation, and so it will continue to increase in intimate relationships. Marriage will also decrease as a trend through its association with ‘legitimizing’ relationships and making them official, as marriage between social classes is less common legally but more common in terms of long term relationships. I’m not sure what will happen to marriages in terms of exposure to resources or opportunities, but I think that these things will naturally coalesce in their own time and way, simply not through legal ties.

Maya Lewis

2023-10-17 05:24:08 UTC

100%. I feel like over the past seven weeks, I have definitely noticed some of what we have learned in class about hookup culture reflected in interactions between students at USC. I would say there is way more of a prevalence to lean to hookup culture rather than long term relationships. I think this can contend to the frat/greek life scene at the school where most of the boys would consider themselves to be able to get with any girl they wanted. I also think that because frat parties entail substance use, it also affects how the students view hookups. People are probably more likely to be more carefree with how they see hookups then if they weren’t at a school where alcohol was more prevalent , maybe there’s a correlation there.

Maya Lewis

2023-10-17 05:33:51 UTC

In the future, I believe we'll witness even more of a shift towards the deinstitutionalization of marriage. As we continue to move away from the more traditional and rigid views of marriage and companionship, I think we'll see a greater emphasis on flexibility and adaptability in relationships. The concept of marriage may evolve to accommodate a broader spectrum of relationship dynamics, reflecting the diverse ways people choose to build their lives together. The deinstitutionalization of marriage may lead to a focus on the core values and dynamics that underpin relationships, rather than the formal structures of it . I've seen this firsthand through the experiences of friends and family. For instance, my cousin chose to have a commitment ceremony with her husband, an event that was deeply personal and meaningful for them, even though it didn't involve a legal marriage. I think it delves into to the evolving nature of companionship, emphasizing emotional connection over societal norms.

Caroline Mikes

2023-10-17 22:18:25 UTC

I absolutely agree that the birth of the digital era, and the rise of online dating and social media, has had major impacts on the relationship between love and money. I think that it has strengthened the link, but also changed the way in which the link exists. Sugar daddy/sugar mommy relationships exist as they always have. While in a newer form, we have seen the use of romantic relationships as means for economic mobility throughout time. Historically, therefore, I feel we have typically viewed the money-love link as more one sided in its larger financial benefits. Social media, however, has provided greater opportunity for mutual financial gain. In a market where the ideal “fairytale” romance is greatly appealing, publicization of personal relationships has become extremely profitable. In my mind, it is this mutual relational profit that is the most revolutionary result of the digital era. While such dynamics can hopefully help certain couples move away from a one sided financial dependence, they produce a financial codependence that perhaps equally negatively affects the nature of these relationships. For famous “influencer” couples, breaking up not only means the loss of a partner, but it can mean the loss of following and financial status. Your relationship becomes all about your brand. Reading this prompt made me think of a famous lesbian Tik Tok couple, Lunden and Olivia, for example. They were recently exposed for hundreds of old racist tweets and are beginning to see backlash and the downfall of their “brand” which is responsible for the sole source of both of their incomes. So much of their relationship revolved around the public view and financial gain of their love. I’m curious to see whether their new marriage will last with the loss of so much that ultimately defined the basis of their relationship. Perhaps cynical, but I am skeptical.

Sage Shimabukuro

2023-10-18 01:19:52 UTC

While traditional face-to-face monetary exchanges may appear to have diminished in the digital sphere, a deeper dive reveals that economic transactions have merely taken on new and diverse forms. Social media influencers adeptly capitalize on their personal lives, blurring the lines between love, lifestyle, and financial gain. In addition, the evolving monetization models of online dating platforms vividly illustrate a clear link between financial investments and the earnest pursuit of meaningful romantic connections. In the digital age, people are now tasked with creating their online personas, effectively investing in the image they project to the world. This investment is not just monetary; it encompasses an allocation of considerable time, sustained effort, and emotional energy. It's so easy to get caught up on interactions on social media. Interactions on platforms like social media and online dating demand these investments. In this complex and rapidly evolving context, the intricate relationship between love and money has become more nuanced and sophisticated than ever before.

Chloe Christner

2023-10-18 19:49:24 UTC

I think that social media and online dating lessens the deep link between love and money. Before these things existed, dating was an in person thing. To get to know each other you usually had to see each other in person by going on dates. Dates cost money. Even just driving to see someone costs money. Now, with social media and online dating you can get to know someone without ever seeing them in person. Social media, texting, and facetime have the relational aspect without the aspect of spending money. You may be talking to someone for a while before either of you have to spend money on eachother, or you figure out how much money they have. Social media and online dating make it so that money doesn’t have to be prevalent. I did long distance with someone and we would facetime every day and talk all the time which didn't require spending money. However, once couples start dating, the link between love and money will probably increase, but it does depend on the couple. Once you start going on dates and spending more time together, there will probably be more of a link between love and money. However, some couples are definitely the exception. Money is such a big part of our lives that it is hard for it not to play a part in relationships. Social media and online dating lessen the impact of money, but it is definitely still there.

Dor Peretz

peretzdor1 — 2023-10-18 21:53:56 UTC

Online dating and social media don’t have an overall net change on the link between love and money. Some relationships that stem from social media and online dating are sugar relationships. These relationships have become much more accessible with social media and even online websites to connect partners to each other. These relationships inherently rely on the transfer of money beyond just paying for dates, with forms of payment including much higher sums of money as literal payment or as gifts ie. cars, watches, designer jewelry and clothing, therefore deepening the link between love and money. However, these are not the only relationships that have been able to develop better with more online connectivity and the emergence of social media. Online dating has allowed many people to find their long-term partners, and as society has continued to progress with regards to feminism and equality, these relationships have often included more equality in the spending of money in relationships. For example, I’d say it's more common now that when two (heterosexual) people are in a girlfriend-boyfriend relationship, the girl also pays for activities the couple does together. In that sense, with both partners paying for aspects related to maintaining their relationship like dates and rent (if the couple lives together), love becomes less tied with money because money in the more gender-egalitarian relationships is less about professing love or establishing it as valid, and more just a logistical aspect of being in a relationship, that couples tackler together. With a mix of relationships where the link between love and money is deeper, and those where it is not resulting from more social media and online dating, social media and dating therefore has a relatively negligible effect on this link.

Kasandra Santiago

kasandra17 — 2023-10-18 23:30:09 UTC

I think social media drastically deepens the link between love and money. I think social media opens doors to so much more peer pressure and influence on what people think they should be redividing from romantic relationships. Things like seeing girls being gifted cars, money, big bouquets of flowers all over different social media platforms, is an example of social media seeping the link between love and money. More people believe that if you love someone you give them expensive things because that is strongly seen all over socials. We talked about the price of engagement rings and how common diamond rings are because of the commercialization of the perfect family and the perfect man proposing to his wife with a diamond ring and staying together forever. Additionally, when it comes to online dating people tend to tie the ideal partner as one who is financially stable and people will be more likely to try and have money or fake having money in order to find people on dating apps. It goes back to the simple tie that money has with looking good, because money buys clothes that people see on socials and are “trendy”. Overall, I believe that social media and online dating will deepen the link between love and money.

Joan Song

joansong1 — 2023-10-18 23:44:09 UTC

I find the concept of online dating very interesting. In the traditional form of in-person dating, many show love by saying sweet things, showing physical affection, taking one another on dates, buying food, flowers, gifts, etc. However, in the online dating world, I figure there is not much to do to express their "lovey-dovey" feelings - a couple of texts, calls, probably selfies? Of course, the content they deliver might be enough for online daters (and that is what keeps them going) without the "dates, gifts, food" part not being as fulfilled. Therefore, I think social media and online dating weaken the link between love and money. Because after all, one's company and reassurance might be all they need for each other, not having the pressure to "impress" each other with fancy birthday gifts and dinners. For people who want to spend money on their significant others, I have noticed a lot of online methods to achieve it casually, such as apple-paying for the girl's new acrylic set, door-dashing to their address when ill, and delivering flowers. Overall, I believe the rise of social media and online couples would not have as strict expectations for "relational work," but I think there's no relationship without any.

Julia Kirsh

jkirsh4 — 2023-10-19 00:59:39 UTC

In my opinion, the rise of social media and online dating has most definitely strengthened the relationship between love and money. Although I do believe that it has been strengthened, I also think that a lot of this strength comes in an artificial form. Many celebrities and influencers love to show off their lavish lifestyles and gifts that their significant other has given them. An example that came to my mind was Tik Tok influencer Anna Paul. One of the many videos she posts are either gifts that she gets for her friends or boyfriend (now ex-boyfriend). These gifts are extremely extravagant and over the top. This is one of the ways that she expresses love towards people in her life. When other couples see the gifts that she is either giving or receiving, their expectations are set higher on gifts that they should be either giving or receiving. These unrealistic gift-giving expectations set unrealistic standards for couples. In addition, as we talked about in class, weddings also feed into this relationship between love and money. Social media has set these expectations for weddings, a public display of two people's love for one another, even higher than they had been in the past. Now that these weddings are being posted on social media, there is an even larger incentive to make sure that your wedding is seen as the best of the best and your love is seen as the best of the best. I have even seen some Tik Toks where the couple hires a “content creator” in addition to their photographer. The role of this creator is to get content for Tik Toks or instagram stories. Prior to the rise of social media, jobs like these never existed. People had weddings to share their love with other people they love. Now, people have weddings to share their love with other people they love and with people that purely click a blue “follow” button. I think that the relationship between money and love has increased and this relationship is parallel to the relationship of an increase in expectations.

Bridget Wang

bmwang1 — 2023-10-19 07:21:04 UTC

I think social media and online dating have sort of exposed the link between love and money. Money’s role in relationships is now easily highlighted and emphasized with social media, and anyone can see the integration of one’s money in their relationships, from the places they travel to with their partner to the food that they eat on their dates. People in relationships have begun to increase publicizing their personal life for various reasons, but it often teeters between wanting to share their life or feeling like they have to share their life. I think the presence of social media has increased the pressure to prove that one is in a secure and happy relationship, and because a lot of people determine the quality of a relationship based on material goods, I think the pressure of having to showcase the link between love and money has increased. Because we can see and track people’s activity through their social media, we can also take in and assess the level of wealth of other people, and that assessment may influence what we think is an appropriate amount of money to spend on a relationship. Online dating may decrease the amount of money spent on the relationship in the beginning, with less money spent on first dates to get to know each other, but I think eventually, the influence of money in that kind of relationship will eventually be more apparent with time.

Fadi Kabi

kabi1 — 2023-10-19 09:16:47 UTC

I think that social media definitely strengthens the connection between love and money. Social media has allowed people to show off their relationships and set higher expectations and standards for people and what they're looking for in their partner. The social media couples portray an image of insane wealth and them bonding over that. For example, you see a tiktok of a couple going on a random trip to Greece. That is obviously unrealistic for most people, but the transfer of money is an essential part of all relationships. You are unable to go on any dates without money, so the desire for a partner who is good financially is high. Also for weddings, which is a symbol for celebrating peoples love, people want to have insanely big weddings, which they take inspiration to from social media, that costs a lot of money.

Thompson Phan

thompsonphan — 2023-10-19 12:23:44 UTC

I believe that social media has definitely played a factor into the deepening of the link between love and money. As social media came to the rise, people began to post more about their luxurious lives and their wealth. And as a result, people began to romanticize that top tier life that was being portrayed and would seek out any way to achieve that life. Influencer is the main culprit of this display of wealth by creating unrealistic expectations within relationships and lifestyles. Dating platforms also now have settings that allow users to filter prospective partners based on income and career.

Nicole Leihe

2023-10-19 20:50:09 UTC

I think that social media and online dating definitely deepen the link between love and money. Prior to social media, people did not have as many opportunities to interact with those outside of their socioeconomic class, and therefore love and dating between different socioeconomic classes was rare. However, with the rise of social media and dating apps, more people have found opportunities to digitally meet and interact with people in higher and/or lower social classes than them. As a result, relationships between different socioeconomic classes are more likely to form, and those relationships may see money as a larger element in their relationship. There's more likely for their to be an obvious difference in wealth in relationships nowadays because of that, and money plays a larger role in those relationships. Additionally, social media and online dating also allow for more platforms where sugar daddies/mommies can find sugar babies. With an increase in these transactional relationships, the link between love and money is essentially deepened, and likely will continue to be as technology evolves. As social media nowadays also serves as a source of income for many people, there exists a larger trend where a number of products are constantly being advertised and promoted to social media users - including romantic gifts. As a result, social media could encourage a shift to romantic relationships being more transactional, and continuous exposure to this kind of merchandising could cause some to measure their relationship success in terms of what valuable gifts they receive, as they experience pressure to have every fancy product advertised to them on social media.

melody wu

wumelody1 — 2023-10-19 22:05:33 UTC

I believe that social media and online dating will deepen the link between love and money, for example on social media platforms such as instagram, we often see people living impossibly glamorous and luxurious lives. Traveling to different destinations, endulging in fancy food or drunks, and flaunting designer outfits. Extreme displays of luxury and wealth can make us subconciously connect love with a certain financial lifestyle, and it brainwashes us into thinking that in order to be happy, we need to experience all these “unrealistic” things with out partners.

The pressure to mantain and show a certain online image may also have an impact on our relationships. To keep up with the Instagram-perfect relationships we see online, we may feel compelled to spend money on vacations, presents, or activities. Ultimately, social media and online dating can encourage consumerism, financial strains, and the idea that love and money are correlated, but they can also help to normalize financial conversations.

Sophia Cachay

scachay2 — 2023-10-20 03:13:48 UTC

Considering social media is so prevalent in our everyday lives, I think it will deepen the link between love and money. From the root of a romantic relationship, that being dating, money has already become a factor. Given social media’s role in materializing things like restaurants, and foods, (date locations in general), I believe it's safe to say that the link between love and money will deepen. Moreover, the next realm where money is clear in the romantic relationship is marriages, where as seen by today’s extravagant marriages, money plays a clear role. Granted, not all couples will choose to have marriages that require a significant amount of money, but as marriages themselves become more commercialized and materialistic (due to social media sharing’s influence) money will have a greater impact on love.

On the other hand, I believe that online dating will lessen the link between love and money. Love that emerges through a digitized platform may require fewer costs, such as the frequent dates and outings that in-person relationships may foster. In other words, online dating lowers the overall costs of relationships, weakening the link between love and money.

Orr Bar-Yossef

baryosse — 2023-10-20 04:36:15 UTC

I believe that social media and online dating deepen the link between love and money. This can be seen in various types of relationships. First, while sugar arrangements have existed before the rise of social media, they have definitely become more common and accessible since. I have heard of instances where people get paid simply for keeping someone company through text messages. This means a lot more people are likely to engage in these types of arrangements. Additionally, social media is often used by people to maintain their social status and image—often through flaunting their lifestyles. This can create an atmosphere in which people feel pressure to maintain/improve their financial status in order to be seen as more attractive in social media. Social media also often leads to people comparing themselves to what they see online. Many influencers create an idealized image of themselves and their romantic relationships on social media. For example, if an influencer posts content of lavish gifts their partner gave them or an expensive vacation their partner took them on it may lead their viewers to desire the same from their own partner, further pushing the idea that love is tied to wealth. In terms of online dating, people often display their wealth, possessions, and status on their dating profiles in hopes of seeming more attractive. This makes wealth/money seem like an important consideration in choosing a partner.

Thomas Bittencourt

tbittenc — 2023-10-20 07:14:21 UTC

Without a doubt, the rise of social media and online dating has most definitely deepened the link between love and money. For one there’s the toxic culture present in image-based social media platforms such as Instagram, where many feel they have to show off in order to receive a sense of acceptance or validation through like-count. The more a partner spends for vacations or beautiful gifts, the more one could post about it in order to not-so-subtly brag about their pleasures. I’ve also noticed that social media sites like Instagram promote outrageously expensive gifts tailored to people in relationships — like a $30+ “antique” rose in a wooden box with some cheap necklace on the other side. So even the platforms themselves are turning into advertisement hotspots to charge people for their love for a partner. Moving on to online dating, I’m not as sure. I could guess that certain people of higher SES receive more matches since money is attractive to many for various reasons, but I can’t help but think of the exclusive dating sites. I can’t remember exact names but I do know that there are online dating sites for farmers, or even exclusively to ivy league school graduates. While this may be a bit tangential and not directly relating to the link between money and love, it is interesting how certain people will only be open to love if it’s from a certain group (which can be SES influenced).

Zoe Hammer

zthammer — 2023-10-20 18:14:36 UTC

While the link between money and love remains complex in an age of technological advancements, I think the use of social media and online dating will deepen the link between love and money. As people use social media more and more, natural comparisons of relationships will arise. Whether an individual is comparing materialistic ownership, the quality of other’s relationships, or financial stability, they may be tempted to prioritize monetary values in their relationship. For example, couples may be compelled to spend more on vacations, buy nicer houses, or give expensive gifts in order to present a certain facade online. Furthermore, those looking to date someone may use social media as a platform to decipher if a potential partner is “wealthy” enough/of the same social class. Additionally, we talked about sugar relationships in class and I think that as online usage continues to increase, more people may get involved in online dating in which one member is paying the other for their affection and attention. However, there are definitely exceptions to this argument. It is possible that social media and online dating while broaden the scope of individuals in the dating marketing, resultingly helping people find their ideal match and then deepening that connection.

Leilani Mate

lmate4 — 2023-10-20 19:01:46 UTC

I think that social media and online dating have deepened the already profound link between love and money. Thanks to social media apps like Instagram and TikTok, it has become significantly easier to publicize your relationship and seek online validation in the form of likes, comments, and views. Relationships where one partner heavily splurges on the other usually receive more attention. This might make a relationship seem inauthentic or sensationalized for the sake of appealing to “influencer culture.” One might decide whether or not to pursue a relationship with someone based on how they’ll be able to flaunt that person’s lifestyle. Another way that social media has affected the connection between love and money is through platforms like OnlyFans, where users can subscribe to creators who produce explicit content. This fosters parasocial public figure/fan relationships, where the fan grows attached and spends money on someone who doesn’t know them back. Another trend I’ve recently seen is the TikTok AI livestreams, where a creator will act suggestively in hopes of receiving donations from livestream viewers, furthering this idea of parasocial relationships. Online dating has a similar impact, in which individuals will flaunt their wealth in an attempt to immediately appeal to other users. Dating app users might post pictures of expensive clothes, cars, and houses to use their wealth as a means of attraction. The addition of online dating also facilitates the establishment of sugar daddy/sugar mommy relationships. A user can easily direct message someone to ask them to partake in these sugar arrangements.

Yasmeena Sharif

2023-10-20 20:23:06 UTC

I do think that online dating and social media help to deepen the link between love and money. I think that now, more than ever, people are able to see what money can buy -- extravagant weddings, Pinterest boards, fancy rings, are now more visible than they ever were before. Even discourse is more widespread due to social media. It is possible to know what thousands of people think about a topic, just by scrolling through your Twitter feed. People now have debates on how much an appropriate ring should cost, how much you should spend on your first date, how much you spend on your wedding, how you should budget, how you should split the bills, who should make more money, etc. etc. However, I also think that while social media has made the topic of money hyper-visible, it also has exposed people to others who might not be in their same SES. In online dating, the first thing you learn about someone is not usually how much money they make (I think), and so you may be exposed to more people outside of your SES. Overall though, I do think that social media has helped to paint a picture of love as transactional, you know you are loved when your partner spends $X on you -- and so I think the link between love and money will only continue to deepen.

Falcon Fu

keyufu — 2023-10-20 20:29:48 UTC

I definitely think that with the rise of internet and social media, there is a more direct link between money and love. One factor is that social medias make advertisement easy and effective. It is very likely for a person in romantic relationship to see something online and want to send it as a gift to his or her partner. And there are often people posting vlogs of receiving gifts from their partners, so even people who don’t used to send gifts start to do this to make their partners happy. Another factor is that the rise of internet and social media let many people start to pursuit quality life. One way for people to do that is by choosing partners with capabilities and resources. In this mindset, it becomes inevitable that people with more money are more likely to attract potential romantic partner.

For the online dating part, I think money is more easily involved than in-person relationship. It is difficult for partners to build a reliable and strong relationship if they’ve never met each other. In this situation, one side of the relationship might try to use money or buy gifts to enhance the relationship. Furthermore, social media and online dating make younger generations of the society more easily to participate in building a romantic relationship. Teenagers are less mature and sometimes can’t utilize their pocket money well. As a result, it becomes really common to see money involve in love.

Victoria Ortiz

vickieortiz2004 — 2023-10-20 20:39:11 UTC

Social media and online dating deepens the link between love and money because of the expectation to draw attention to financial statuses. One chooses exactly the image they want to create for themselves through social media. By crafting this image, one can choose to present themselves as more affluent than they are, or intentionally displaying this affluence. Through social media/search engines, one can immediately find someone’s profession and even what their house is worth. I have seen friends look through guys’ social media pages and become more interested once they see that they are often on boats, at music festivals, or attending private universities. I think that social media perpetuates this idea of perfection, which includes wealthiness.

Seeing others’ wealth and lavish lifestyles may cause jealousy and a lack of fulfillment within already-established relationships. Although one might feel emotionally fulfilled, if they are constantly seeing other people post about their overly expensive vacations, gifts, or dates they begin feeling insecure in their relationships. These examples might even lead to breaking up because they feel as though their current partner cannot provide this “perfect” lifestyle, that typically is just performative. This constant publication of people’s intimate lives is toxic because one can pick and choose what is being put out on social media.

Rosy Almanzar

2023-10-20 21:54:33 UTC

I believe that social media and online dating has deepened the link between love and money. With social media the idea of “flexing” is so prevalent for a lot people where they want to show they have the nicest cars or clothes, and that they take the nicest vacations. Especially with the rise of influencer culture where these people will only entertain people who can “fly them out” and shower with material things. Similarly, there has been the rise of sugar babies, daddies, etc. Where this lifestyle of being financially sustained is glamorized. Social media overall is flooded with wealthy people setting the standard for what an “aesthetic” life is. For example, Sofia Richie, Alix Earle, or even Kylie Jenner, all women who are the epicenter of influencing but live a life that is unattainable to most. This is causing people to become attached and in turn striving for a lifestyle that may not be realistic for them. Overall, thanks to the culture perpetuated by social media people are constantly chasing wealth and this has translated into what people strive for in their personal lives, specifically when it comes romantic relationships.

Fin Liu

fzliu — 2023-10-21 00:01:29 UTC

With the rise of social media and online presence, the link between money and love is much stronger. It’s so much easier for transactions of love/sex for money to occur. Sugar arrangements can be found so much easier, and there are so many more types of transactions that occur. Other sorts of things specific to social media include onlyfans, pay pigs, etc. Specific niches are much more prevalent and easier to access. Before social media, porn actors were exploited often(a lot still are), but with onlyfans and social media being a place to easily promote services, it’s led to a somewhat safer environment for sex work. Social media has also helped destigmatize sex work to an extent. It’s more normalized for people to be participating in sex work for some extra cash. Some people sell feet pictures or other fetish content that doesn’t show their face. Dating apps are another story. A lot of young people on dating apps are not looking for love, but instead hookups. There are also apps/sites for people to arrange paid relationships(escorts, sugar arrangements, etc). Some of the ones on dating sites are catfishing, or bots. They use fake images that are not really what they look like.

Miles Linde

mlinde5 — 2023-10-21 02:19:49 UTC

I think social media would increase the link between love and money as it makes people aspire to things they can't ever achieve while also making humans more materialistic.

Studies on the male versus the female gaze often focus on what each gender finds most attractive, finding men care more about physical attractiveness versus women caring more about status (both socially and financially). We can relate the results of men's attraction to fake, unattainably beautiful Instagram models to women probably having the same longing for the financial security that their favorite pop star or actor whom they follow on social media would be able to offer them.

Social media is all about appearances, and how you display your image on a site like Instagram can change how other people perceive you, which can directly affect how you view yourself. There is also evidence that social media leads to comparison. Comparing appearances makes people want to make their own appearance better, leading to materialism in order to appear desirable to an outside viewer: wishes for expensive on-brand clothing, exotic cars, and a big mansion. This increase in the capitalistic nature of society, which social media promotes, will likely seep into the dating market. This will make both parties more interested in what the other person wants to do for a living, increasing the link between money and love.

Finally, as people (especially uneducated people) waste their time on social media rather than focusing their time in a productive manner, the already incredible economic gap between the top and the bottom of society will increase, making everyone more likely to focus on money. As we've read about, things like marriage take on a more economic symbol in lower-income communities, and as the pay gap increases between the top and the bottom in this country, so will the perceptive link between money and love.

Georgia Klass

GeorgiaKlass — 2023-10-21 03:34:41 UTC

I believe that social media and online dating can both deepen and lessen the deep link that has existed between love and money. At times, online dating, specifically through online dating apps such as Tinder, can lessen the link between love and money and, instead, deepen the link between love and physical attraction. Many dating apps allow you to choose what you want to keep anonymous and what you want people to see. The anonymity aspect of certain dating apps lessens the linkage between love and money because you are often unable to see how much money a person has and how much they spend based on their profile. Thus, you are choosing a partner based on photos provided, interests, goals, etc. Therefore, you are less likely to initially choose a partner based on how much money they have when using online dating apps.

Although the use of dating apps and the opportunity for your financial status or spending status to remain anonymous may lessen the connection between love and money, social media and the internet may deepen the link between love and money. Social media and the internet allow individuals to stalk potential partners. Through stalking and analyzing one’s lifestyle, it is easy to make assumptions about how much money one has or discover more about their finances (eg. net worth). Since there are so many ways to find out someone's socioeconomic status, an individual may consciously or unconsciously gain or lose interest in a partner.

Katie Youn

2023-10-21 04:43:06 UTC

I believe that social media and online dating deepens the link between love and money. There is already a large online market in place where people can sell services relating to emotional or physical connection. The internet makes it incredibly easy and convenient to reach out to people, no matter if you’re the seller or the buyer. Plenty of platforms have been created to cater these services to people who are willing to pay for them. Sugar mommy and daddy sites seem to have a prevalent existence on the internet, and I’ve often seen sugar mommies/daddies being the butt of ongoing internet jokes. Platforms like Onlyfans allow creators to have control over the images and videos they choose to post on the internet by placing monetary value on them. Apps like Venmo and Zelle make for easy online transactions between two people.

I don’t think the opportunities online platforms give to society are a bad thing, though. It allows people to receive the financial compensation that they deserve, especially people working in industries that have a history of exploitation and unfair payment like the porn industry. However, it does raise some questions about whether or not strengthening this link between love and money takes away from the emotional side of romantic interactions, especially since the line often blurs for consumers. Many men who have used services such as escorts tend to develop feelings for these escorts, despite the fact that they know they are paying them for physical intimacy.

Michael Blasi

mblasi5 — 2023-10-21 05:00:51 UTC

I do think social media and online dating deepen the link between love and money. In previous generations, we have only had access to a significantly smaller pool of individuals with whom we interacted on a day-to-day basis. With that, typically our dating options were also similarly significantly smaller. With social media, however, we have access to a much higher number of people which allows us to expand our dating pool to people we may have never come across before. While this may be a positive change, it makes the dating pool a lot more competitive. Look at it this way: imagine being at an ice cream shop and seeing hundreds of equally great-tasting flavors, unable to choose which one to eat. All of a sudden, you begin sampling each and examining the taste, but with so many flavors it’s hard to narrow down your favorites. In previous generations, there were only perhaps a handful of these flavors which made choosing your ice cream a lot easier, however nowadays there are so many more factors at play when choosing, because after all you only want to choose your favorite despite them being all delicious. This can be seen as a metaphor for the modern dating scene and how social media has increased competition within it. Because there are so many options around nowadays, having money becomes so much more important, as it keeps you competitive in the dating scene. So, I think social media does deepen the connection between love and money because having money is arguably an even more important factor in the dating market nowadays.

Tyler Gevas

2023-10-21 05:19:05 UTC

Social media and online dating platforms have had a mixed impact on the deep link between love and money. On one hand, they have the potential to deepen this connection by giving individuals access to many amounts of information about a potential partner's lifestyle, wealth, and material possessions. This can lead to a heightened emphasis on financial status and materialistic considerations when evaluating potential romantic interests, potentially overshadowing the emotional and personal connection that love is traditionally built upon. On the other hand, social media and online dating also have the potential to lessen the deep link between love and money. These platforms provide opportunities for individuals to connect based on shared interests, values, and emotional compatibility, fostering connections that are less influenced by financial considerations. Additionally, online dating can offer a wider pool of potential partners, allowing individuals to focus more on personal compatibility rather than financial status. In all, the impact of social media and online dating on the deep link between love and money will depend on how individuals navigate these platforms and whether they prioritize genuine connections over materialistic considerations.

Jada Griffiths

2023-10-21 05:22:20 UTC

Social media definitely deepens the thinking between love and money because as times change into a more digital era social media's influence over almost everything vastly increases. Financial means and compatibility are interconnected as time progresses. More people are adding value to being financially stable and thriving as opposed to struggling. Thus the partners they choose are more financially well off than them more often than not. Therefore, the influence of social media can only add to this prospective idea. People also often use money as a way of expressing love. This goes back into the idea of love languages and how you show affection. Many people need someone who can buy them things to feel loved and appreciated. Couples often show things off via social media like vacations, gifts and dates. This can make those who want a relationship need one with money or glorify having money to make a relationship work. This idea goes into social media adding to comparisons, jealousy and envy that people often hold towards other couples and relationships. This can strain a relationship and lead to many complications within one. Furthermore social media creates negative ideas in one’s mind and false expectations.

Suede Sanders

suedesan — 2023-10-21 06:01:54 UTC

Social media has undeniably influenced relationships in numerous ways, including the dynamic between money and love. It has, in many cases, strengthened the connection between these two aspects. Dating apps and social media platforms have enabled people to be more selective in their choice of partners, allowing them to find individuals who align with their standards and preferences. This increased selectivity can sometimes be linked to financial factors, as people seek partners with similar economic backgrounds or lifestyles. In addition, social media has created a platform where individuals often show off their lives in extravagant ways, thanks to the influence of money. The mention of sugar daddy or sugar mama situations also illustrates how social media has expanded the realm of such relationships. While these stations already existed, It has made it easier for individuals to connect with potential partners who are willing to provide financial support in exchange for companionship and affection, even in cases where physical meetings may not be necessary.

Parker Taylor

parkerta3 — 2023-10-21 12:00:06 UTC

As we continually immerse ourselves for better or worse into the digital era and social media in its variegation of forms continues to increase in usage and popularity, I think the link between love and money will definitely be deepened and furthered. The increase of online modes of consuming content has paved the way for websites such as OnlyFans to formulate a simulated, parasocial notion of ‘love’ in exchange for money. Social media and the internet in general also have cultivated an environment where things like sugar arrangements and the market for escorts can thrive as people have an easy way to access and purchase whatever type of ‘love’ experience they want, regardless of how authentic. This can lead to a stronger presence of things like these aforementioned sugar arrangements as sugar babies or parents with certain criteria or aspects of a relationship they’re looking for are able to examine a multitude of options and engage in low-stakes communication much more easily online to find the ‘right person’ than in real life. The existence and rising popularity of online direct transaction services like Venmo, Cashapp, Zelle, and more also make all of the online transactional love processes much easier. Being able to possibly pay by the minute for virtual romantic experiences or purchase access to, for example, a VR romance simulator allows people a wide variety of options to experience at least a simulacrum of love online, but it is always inherently tied to money and thus perpetuates this love-money link.

Aadya Nijhawan

2023-10-23 03:37:43 UTC

I believe that social media helps to strengthen the deep link between money and love . In india , economic factors continue to play an important role in deciding marriages . Money is given alot of importance because it is also related to social status . Social media gives a superficial view of an individual . It only describes the person on the basis of what is shown there . People only post things that make them look much better and well off than what is true in reality . Hence , individuals start talking and making conversation with people who look well to do on social media . This simple conversation between two people develops into something much bigger . Even otherwise , money helps to maintain financial stability. Couples are more secure in their relationships . Fights are reduced and love continues to grow . Additionally , social media provides exposure to a wide variety of people. It increases the options that people have. It helps to connect people who are like-minded , including those who share similar financial goals and aspirations. This can impact an individual’s financial situation. Couples and partners can use social media to openly discuss and share their financial goals, encouraging transparency and collaboration in managing money. Lastly, social media can often host financial literacy content, blogs, and resources that can help budgeting, investing, and managing their finances. These resources can benefit both individuals and couples.

Maya Lewis

2023-10-23 21:45:56 UTC

I feel like it's hard to say whether social media and online dating would deepen or lessen connections the links between love and money. On one hand, these platforms can encourage superficiality, as people often showcase carefully curated versions of themselves, emphasizing their wealth and success. This can create a disguise through materialism that may overshadow deeper emotional connections. It becomes too easy for individuals to disguise their true selves behind these digital facades. On the other hand, online platforms can potentially deepen the link between love and money, as they can connect people with similar financial aspirations and values, thereby fostering compatibility. Because of this, I think it can go both ways in deepening or lessening the connections between the two.

This week, we've discussed many different theories about the impact of technology on 1. finding a partner and 2. maintaining a romantic relationship. For both of these aspects of romance, which theoretical perspective(s) most align with what you've seen around you?

eshimada1 — 2023-10-30 17:51:45 UTC

Bridget Wang

bmwang1 — 2023-11-01 06:19:00 UTC

I think technology’s influence on finding and maintaining relationships is a little more negative than positive. I think the concept that Sherry Turkle addresses about being connected but alone really stands out as a major theoretical perspective. Access to a variety of different people doesn’t make up for the lack of depth that online dating apps usually possess. Although I’m sure that some long-lasting relationships form through technology, I don’t think that people usually have online dating in mind when searching for a serious romantic relationship. There’s a duality when it comes to online dating; there’s an informational side, where we get to receive someone’s basic interests and get to know who they are before we commit to anything, and there’s also a superficiality to it all, where we judge people based on looks instead of personality. I think that technology does create a network of connection, but the level of intimacy and deep connection that can be created through online dating can easily be called into question. I also think that the concept of assortative dating sums up the online dating experience. Not only do people tend to choose romantic partners similar to them regardless of the variety of options, each person’s personal bias is tended to through online dating, and stereotypes, in a way, are allowed. I think online dating apps are just platforms that people use for entertainment in today’s world because even if those apps were created to make connections, they don’t do a good job of making deep enough connections for long lasting romantic relationships.

Thomas Bittencourt

tbittenc — 2023-11-01 22:24:53 UTC

For both of these aspects of romance, I’d say the Communicative Interdependence Theory most aligns with what I’ve seen around me. While FTF and CMC may appear as separate forms of communication that work mutually with each other, especially when it comes to finding a partner (1.), it’s when they are integrated together that I see people with this higher relationship satisfaction. For example, there are plenty of people that I’ve met that act sociable in-person but suck at texting or any other form of CMC. Whether they come off as dry, unreliable response times, or something else — FTF and CMC when independent from each other can lead to inconsistency which is quite unsatisfactory in a romantic relationship. The couples that I see that maintain a higher relationship satisfaction, often can’t make note of any real disconnect between the two (FTF and CMC). My analogy for the whole thing would be that FTF and CMC are more like the “light mode” and “dark mode” of an application rather than separate apps altogether. Hope that helps

Kasandra Santiago

2023-11-01 23:29:41 UTC

I think the perspectives that most align with what I have seen around me have to be the idea of “liquid love” I think that in this day in age people tend to not value romantic partners as much as they used to because they know that if they get sick of someone it's not as hard to find someone new with technology or simply not feel as bad about it because they can find someone else to distract. Especially with new dating apps, I feel that I don't see as many long lasting relationships in this day and age and I do think technology impacts this. Additionally, I think that technology making higher beauty standards has placed a negative effect on relationships. I think that people's expectations have been set higher due to the unrealistic things seen online. People now tend to focus on what someone looks like, the superficial sides of love and relationships and I really do think that has to do with the impact technology has to do with setting high, unrealistic beauty standards. I’ve personally seen and heard men speaking on women and beauty and vice versa. I do think that because physical attraction plays such a big role in relationships, technology making beauty standards rise does make it more difficult for people to find someone who lives up to their expectations. I overall think that technology has negatively impacted relationships, from beauty standards to other superficial things it has made the expectations set on relationships higher.

Hannah Poulter

2023-11-02 00:39:30 UTC

In terms of finding a romantic partner, I feel as though the technology and beauty standards relationship research by Fox and Vendemia is most fitting to my perception of the relationships around me. For my friends and family who use dating apps as a way of searching for a potential partner, I often hear stories about dates who were ‘way different to their picture’ or ‘not as good in real life’ and how that automatically wrote them off as a potential partner. I feel as though online dating apps (and other technology) has a tendency to create unrealistic expectations of people’s features (appearance in particular) as they are able to ‘create’ an ideal image of themselves to present online. However, the minute that their looks differ even slightly from the look they presented, they are viewed as a ‘catfish’ or ‘disappointing’. In terms of maintaining a partner, I believe that. Couples including each other in their digital activities allows for a relationship to be strengthened. It’s a regular occurrence for me or my friends to send tiktoks and instagram posts that made us think of a partner or that we think they would like, and I believe that, it demonstrates affection and love etc. in just as an effective way as if the same affection was shown by FTF. This ‘new’ medium of maintaining a relationship is becoming the norm of how couples communicate and in turn maintain their relationships.

Julia Kirsh

jkirsh4 — 2023-11-02 01:16:29 UTC

Personally, I feel like the communicative interdependence theory and the media multiplexity theory are two of the theories that align most with what I have experienced and what I have seen others experience around me. Speaking from my personal experiences with not just my partner, but also with my friendships and familial connections, using FTF and CMC as separate forms of communication and integrating the two have helped strengthen my relationships. One of the main examples that I can think of in my life, which we also spoke about in class, was sharing images with my partner. Being in a long distance relationship, it is not always easy to keep up with one another's lives, so one of the ways I find exciting is sending each other pictures from our weeks. If it is a picture of the sunset or a picture of us at a tailgate, it is a very effective way to communicate and stay connected, while also staying up to date with each other’s lives. This technique is aligned with the media multiplexity theory, but I also see the communicative interdependence theory play a role as well. When I went home for fall break and saw my boyfriend, we looked through some of the pictures that we had already shown one another over text in addition to showing each other new photos. This was a great way to hear some funny stories and catch up with one another. Integrating CMC and FTF (communicative interdependence theory) while also utilizing them as separate channels of communication (media multiplexity theory) has proven effective for me in both my romantic and non-romantic relationships.

Sage Shimabukuro

2023-11-02 01:19:23 UTC

The theory perspective that most aligns with me is CIT. which suggests that communication plays a vital role in fostering and sustaining romantic bonds. In today's tech-savvy world, this theory is particularly relevant. Technology has revolutionized how people connect when it comes to finding a partner. For example, online dating platforms adn social media have expanded the amount of potential partners and facilitated initial communication. CIT aligns with this by emphasizing the significance of constant and meaningful communication in building emotional connections. In this new digital age, individuals can engage in conversations before meeting in person, allowing for the development of strong communicative realtionship. For maintaining a romantic relationship, technology offers various tools for couples to stay connected. Long-distance relationships, for instance, benefit from Factimes, text messages, and social media platforms. CIT posits that maintaining a relationship requires continuous communication, and technology provides the means for partners to share their lives, thoughts, and emotions on a daily basis. However, CIT also cautions about the potential downsides of technology, such as the risk of miscommunication or emotional distancing when real-world interactions are replaced with digital ones. It's essential for couples to strike a balance and use technology as a supplement, not a replacement, for in-person communication. I think this is the hardest part of being in such a digital age. It is easy to get complacent with online relationships however we need fact to face interactions as well.

Fadi Kabi

2023-11-02 03:08:26 UTC

I think that when it comes to finding a partner, technology has made it much easier for people to do that. Social media is very easily accessible and free all around the world, at any time, in the palm of your hand, so it makes it very easy to meet people if you try. With social media you are not confined to the area you live in to meet people. The large number of people still make it even easier to pick the person who is most similar to you. This is the idea of assortive mating where you will choose a mate that is the most similar to you. Online everyone puts on their best image, so meeting people and getting to know them is quite easy. The issue with that the quality and longevity of the relationships is not as good. You are not inclined to make the best possible relationships because the idea of "liquid love" where someone is easily replaceable because of the large availability. Even if your relationship is genuine, your connections are not as deep because of the wide variety of access available.

Maya Lewis

2023-11-02 03:13:49 UTC

I think in the context of young adults, the impact of technology on finding and maintaining romantic relationships is mostly negative. The values have tended more towards the concept of “liquid love.” I feel like most young adults, in particular, put less value on romantic relationships. I feel like because other people are so accessible through technology, it is easier for people (usually see it more in men) to feel like they can always do better leading to treating people they are currently with badly because they never fear this will be the last attractive person they will come across. Since technology has advanced and more people are readily accessible, cheating is more prevalent and easier to do. Also, having technology has made people more superficial. People look at and put more emphasis on visual attraction before they look at personality traits and it honestly makes everything worse. However, in terms of CMC, I feel it can improve things for people already in a serious relationship. Especially, when the couple doesn’t always have time to see each other, CMC can be a great way to bridge the gap between the space between them.

Victoria Ortiz

vickieortiz2004 — 2023-11-02 06:18:33 UTC

The perspective that aligns most with what I’ve seen when it comes to technology’s role in finding a partner is Rosenfeld’s theories of widening one’s dating pool and introducing us to people we might have never met. While many may argue that online dating and technology have made society deviate too far from the traditional notions of meeting a partner and forming relationships in person. However, for introverted individuals or people who simply do not have time to meet people in social settings, technology has become an important platform for them to meet new people. I know many people who were struggling to find a partner, turned to online dating, and are now happily married to the person they met through Tinder. I believe that the stigmas surrounding platforms like Tinder and Hinge are destructive to our society that heavily relies on the media.

The perspective that aligns most with what I’ve seen and experienced when it comes to maintaining a healthy, romantic relationship is the Communicative Interdependence Theory. As someone in a long distance relationship, technology has played such an important role in communication and connection. My boyfriend and I set up “dates” such as movie nights or just sit in silence while doing our own school work on FaceTime to help build the bridge between time and space. Even when we weren’t long distance, we still facetimed often and this helped strengthen our bond outside of the time we spent in person. Technology has made our relationship stronger in the sense of being able to feel close, while being so far from one another geographically.

Victoria Ortiz

vickieortiz2004 — 2023-11-02 06:19:43 UTC

Nicole Leihe

2023-11-02 07:11:19 UTC

I think I've most definitely seen Bauman's "Liquid Love" theory as well as Caughlin and Sharabi's Communicative Interdependence Theory the most around me. Especially coming to college where hookup culture is incredibly prevalent, technologies including social media and dating apps have made it incredibly easy for people to go from romantic prospect to romantic prospect, whether it's to find quick flings or rebounds from previous relationships. For example, some of my friends have used dating apps and even Instagram DMs to find multiple potential romantic partners at a time, and essentially build a "roster". Aligning with Bauman's "Liquid Love" theory, these patterns on college campuses definitely undermine commitment and security in romantic relationships and encourage short-term flings instead. On the other hand, for those who are in committed relationships, I've seen many people around me integrating both FTF and CMC in their relationship. I've seen people create Tiktoks and/or Instagram posts with their significant others, which effectively uses CMC while having FTF interactions at the same time. Because couples on campus may not be together 24/7, they also use CMC such as texting and facetime to bridge the gaps where they don't see each other, which effectively aligns with the communicative interdependence theory (and also somewhat Gidden's "transcendence" theory!).

Jada Griffiths

jadagrif — 2023-11-02 08:46:57 UTC

Technology has an increasingly impactful influence on people's perception of relationships as well as someone's ability to find a romantic partner. From the modern communication perspective focusing on how media and technology shape public discourse is increasing communicative differences such as shifting from face-to-face communication to digital. This delves into what the text was discussing with the cues-filtered-out perspective. When people communicate, especially through certain channels like written text or email, they may miss out on nonverbal cues such as tone of voice, facial expressions, or body language, which can be crucial for fully understanding the message. It also can overcomplicate a relationship and cause a person to draw conclusions on something that might not be true thus ending a relationship or creating tension. Therefore, in the 2nd point, it would be hard to maintain a healthy relationship with the cues-filtered-out perspective. Additionally, according to the text, the aptitude perspective heavily focuses. It involves assessing a person's natural talents, cognitive abilities, and aptitudes to determine their suitability for a particular task. This can also apply to people when choosing a partner because it assesses the compatibility between two people as well as their matching interests. It contributes to the 1st part of the argument of how people can choose partners but also the maintenance of a relationship. According to the text, it involves assessing a person's natural talents, cognitive abilities, and aptitudes to determine their suitability for a particular task it not only potential similarities meaning attraction but also asses capability.

Jada Griffiths

jadagrif — 2023-11-02 08:49:13 UTC

Technology has an increasingly impactful influence on people's perception of relationships as well as someone's ability to find a romantic partner. From the modern communication perspective focusing on how media and technology shape public discourse is increasing communicative differences such as shifting from face-to-face communication to digital. This delves into what the text was discussing with the cues-filtered-out perspective. When people communicate, especially through certain channels like written text or email, they may miss out on nonverbal cues such as tone of voice, facial expressions, or body language, which can be crucial for fully understanding the message. It also can overcomplicate a relationship and cause a person to draw conclusions on something that might not be true thus ending a relationship or creating tension. Therefore, in the 2nd point, it would be hard to maintain a healthy relationship with the cues-filtered-out perspective. Additionally, according to the text, the aptitude perspective heavily focuses. It involves assessing a person's natural talents, cognitive abilities, and aptitudes to determine their suitability for a particular task. This can also apply to people when choosing a partner because it assesses the compatibility between two people as well as their matching interests. It contributes to the 1st part of the argument of how people can choose partners but also the maintenance of a relationship. According to the text, it involves assessing a person's natural talents, cognitive abilities, and aptitudes to determine their suitability for a particular task it not only has potential similarities meaning attraction but also asses capability.

Jada Griffiths

jadagrif — 2023-11-02 08:49:48 UTC

Technology has an increasingly impactful influence on people's perception of relationships as well as someone's ability to find a romantic partner. Through the modern communication perspective when focusing on how media and technology shape public discourse is increasing in communicative differences such as shifting from face to face communication to digital. This devles into what the text was discussing with the cues-filtered-out perspective. When people communicate, especially through certain channels like written text or email, they may miss out on nonverbal cues such as tone of voice, facial expressions, or body language, which can be crucial for fully understanding the message. It also can overcomplicate a relationship and cause a person to draw conclusions on something that might not be true thus ending a relationship or creating tension. Therefore, into the 2nd point it would be hard to maintain a healthy relationship with the cues-filtered-out perspective. Additionally according to the text the aptitude perspective heavily focuses. It involves assessing a person's natural talents, cognitive abilities, and aptitudes to determine their suitability for a particular task. This can also apply to people when choosing a partner because it assess the compatibility between two people as well as their matching interests. It contributes to the 1st part of the argument of how people can choose partners but also the maintenance of a relationship. Since according to the text it involves assessing a person's natural talents, cognitive abilities, and aptitudes to determine their suitability for a particular task it not only potiential similarities meaning attraction but alsao asses capatability.

Joan Song

joansong1 — 2023-11-02 18:42:47 UTC

The rise of technology, whether or not it be positive or negative, is hugely affecting the patterns in forming and maintaining romantic relationships. Some say that it's no different than meeting someone at a bar or even a library where you approach them based on their appearance, and I do see a valid point in that. No one fully knows what a person is like when deciding to talk to them in the first place. Regarding finding a partner online, there are countless apps nowadays that promote words like "genuine," "real," and "friendship," I think because they know that people have negative stereotypes about finding partners online which seems more casual and for hookups. There are pros and cons to finding partners online. Some pros might be convenience (either swipe left or right based on quick, self-presented information), and accessibility to widely different types of people (some might struggle to find partners in real life). Some cons might be the depth of the relationship (there seem to be shallower connections through online connections, certainly there are exceptions), and unknown possibilities (even though this happens in real life, it is more common online). Overall, I think that people have different purposes in pursuing romantic relationships and technology serves that just right, giving them a variety of choices.

Mei Higashi

mjhigash — 2023-11-02 21:23:34 UTC

As for both of these topics, I agree the most with Michael Rosenfield’s discoveries in how people find a romantic partner. His research claims that most people tend to find their relationships and dating partners primarily from dating apps. I want to emphasize especially his findings that there was still an “in person” element that is typically present during these situations - in which friends and acquaintances still usually play a role. Oftentimes, they will provide commentary, advice and support during one’s dating processes, helping one complete their profile or reviewing possible mates’ authenticity and validity. One of the most powerful ways that technology has altered both the processes of finding partners and maintaining those relationships that end up as an outcome are the algorithmic developments that have been made. There are immense improvements that have allowed individuals to filter their suggestions based on logistical details, such as age, location, and availability, as well as more personal discrepancies, such as smoking and drinking habits, sexual preference, and love languages.

Dor Peretz

peretzdor1 — 2023-11-02 21:28:45 UTC

The theory of dramaturgy is most relevant to finding a partner under the impact of technology. There definitely seems to be a social script with regards to how to attract a partner/get a first date with them even while interacting online. There are social “rules” on how to communicate and show interest ranging from not replying to texts too fast (a few minutes) nor too slow (days), liking a story post only after a certain amount of time, or sliding into someone’s dm’s with an appropriate (flirty, funny, and not overly sexual) pickup line. Additionally, finding romance through social media seems to be further linked with dramaturgy in that even before interactions with someone else, the way we present ourselves on social media is a sort of “role” we play. Our pictures, captions, bio etc. are all curated to convey specific aspects we want to be associated with/perceived as, with regards to what aesthetics or what social groups we belong to. The social roles of dramaturgy seem to also work along with the influence of the gender power structure, with women generally trying to present themselves on dating apps and social media as part of the group of women belonging to “emphasized femininity” and men generally doing the same with hegemonic masculinity. With regards to maintaining a romantic relationship, the theory of maintenance behaviors for increasing relationship satisfaction along with love languages seems most aligned with the relationships I’ve seen be successful even in this age of technology.

Leilani Mate

lmate4 — 2023-11-03 04:39:47 UTC

The theoretical perspective I’ve heavily observed while at USC is the concept of “liquid love” developed by Bauman. In college, I’ve noticed that those looking for romantic connections are often not interested in committed, long-term relationships. Because of this lack of commitment, there is less weight or burden on ending romantic connections because they weren’t serious to begin with. Rather than long-term relationships, I’ve seen many people around me enter “situationships” that both start and end quickly. Technology is a significant factor in the rise of liquid love, especially the use of social media and dating apps. For example, a guy could be talking to multiple girls on Instagram DMs and simply move on from one girl to the next when he feels like trying someone new. I’ve observed very little stability in college relationships because of how easy it is to scout out new partners online. In terms of maintaining romantic relationships, concepts I’ve particularly noticed are media multiplexity theory and communicative interdependence theory. A prominent example of the integration of FTF and CMC leading to higher relationship satisfaction is the use of social media in relationships. I’ve noticed that when individuals post their significant other on apps like Instagram, it almost acts like an official cementing of their relationship. Through this “hard launch,” couples can develop their relationship in both in-person and online spaces, leading to higher satisfaction. I’ve also observed communicative interdependence theory through couples’ use of texting. Because of how hectic college life is, it’s difficult to consistently meet up with your partner. A combination of texting and meeting face-to-face leads to higher satisfaction because allows couples to have more frequent interaction with each other.

Falcon Fu

keyufu — 2023-11-03 07:30:39 UTC

From my perspective, under the technology advancement scenario, both the FTF and CMC play a major positive role in finding and maintaining a romantic relationship. Though these two are separated theories, they could be combined and utilized well. As an international student studying in the U.S., many of my high school classmates came together to form a romantic relationship. While they could see each other every day while they were on campus, this type of FTF stopped when winter or summer breaks came. Even for students who came from the same country, they most likely came from a different state or province, which made the maintaining a romantic relationship difficult. However, using technology to chat online and facetime made things a lot easier for those couples. There was normally a smooth transition from FTF to CMC or the other way around. It is also true that maintaining a romantic relationship through long distance could be difficult, but at least the role of technology in it makes this type of relationship more stable. From what I observed, it was often theoretical disagreements or the feelings of insecurities that led to the termination of a relationship rather than other reasons. On the other hand, it is also true that technology makes it easier for one side of the relationship to cheat on the other side, but that is not happening on most cases. Therefore, I would argue that the benefits of combining FTF and CMC is more than the issues they bring.

Orr Bar-Yossef

2023-11-03 16:38:20 UTC

Overall, from what I have seen around me, technology mostly negatively impacts romantic relationships. On one hand, technology and social media definitely make it much easier to find a partner. As seen in Rosenfeld, Thomas, and Hausen’s study, technology increases our access to potential partners. Without social media, people can only meet potential partners through face-to-face interactions. This means that the circle of people they are exposed to is typically very limited to the places where they spend the most time/where they live. However, social media widens this circle significantly. It gives people access to millions of people across the globe. Dating apps also make it very easy to find people who are also looking for a potential partner. However, this accessibility gives rise to problems in the quality and longevity of romantic relationships. Bauman’s concept of “liquid love” argues that technology has “liquified” the security of long-term relationships. This is due to the fact that when a committed relationship doesn’t work out, people are quick to end the relationship instead of putting in the time and effort to make it work because they have the security of knowing they can go on social media/dating apps and quickly find a new partner. While technology does have some benefits in finding a partner, it also plays a negative role in the commitment of relationships.

Zoe Hammer

zthammer — 2023-11-03 18:25:32 UTC

The theoretical perspective that most aligns with what I’ve seen around me is Fox and Vendemia’s technology and beauty standards theory. In this theory, they suggest that dating apps and social media have created a Selective Self-Presentation in which users will curate what gets shown to the public. As a result, their appearance, status, and success become manipulated by the people, creating an illusion of a person who is not like this in reality. I’ve seen this phenomenon play out in my life all over social media. People try to remind each other that Instagram and other platforms are just “highlight reels” of the best aspects of someone’s life; however, when a person is consuming this information regularly, they may struggle to keep this in mind. In relation to dating, these perpetuating beauty standards transition over to selective dating on different apps in which individuals will pick a partner based on a facade. As a result, people may struggle to find genuine connections with authentic people. Another effect of Fox and Vendemia’s theory is that users of dating apps may raise their standards to unachievable levels based on unrealistic expectations.

Sophia Cachay

scachay2 — 2023-11-03 23:24:25 UTC

When it comes to technology’s impact on finding a partner, I heavily observe Caughlin and Sharabi’s theory of Communicative Interdependence in my everyday life. Given that phone usage seems so detrimental in our everyday lives, I often see couples communicating via screens more than face-to-face, even if they are in each other’s vicinity. I think that this practice is influenced by the fact that videos and photos can evoke different feelings of intimacy, just like quality FTF time can. Thus, when they’re integrated, they aid relationships. Regarding which perspective on maintaining a romantic relationship aligns the most with what I see and experience, I would say technology bridging time and space is most fitting. Considering long-distance relationships are prevalent in college, technology is routinely used to keep couples in contact, thus prolonging relationships. This perspective also applies to platonic relationships, as my best friend and I can remain super close because of technological advantages like Facetime, and message. Another perspective I would say is common in the ages seen around me would be the perspective that technology allows for visualization. This perspective plays hand-in-hand with technology bridging time and space, as they both aid the existence of long-distance relationships. For instance, from the technology-visualization perspective, the transaction of videos and photos can help relationships feel more intimate. A personal experience I can share is that within my friend group, we will share weekly photo dumps to visually update each other on what's going on in our lives.

Aadya Nijhawan

2023-11-04 00:50:03 UTC

The impact of technology on finding a romantic partner and maintaining the relationship is a complex topic. I believe that the communicative interdependence theory most aligns with what I have seen around me. While CMC can help to find a romantic partner, FTF can help to build the relationship and increases relationship satisfaction.

In the digital age, technology plays a key role in the way people find their partners. Online dating platforms, dating apps, and social media aid in finding romantic partners. The communicative interdependence theory states that early interactions and communication are important in the beginning stages of forming connections. In online relationships, partners rely on online platforms to get to know each other. Technology aids in maintaining relationships.

Personally, being in a long distance relationship with partner who lives in India poses many challenges. The 12.5 hour time difference makes communication hard. The communicative interdependence theory which emphasizes the use of both FTF and CMC is clearly highlighted in my relationship. I go back to India every 4 months and hence only get to meet him then. Our FTF interactions help us to significantly build our bond and to know each other more. For the other months when I am in college, which make up a significant part of our year, social media and FaceTime make communication much easier. It helps us to connect and stay committed even though we are separated by time and space.

Katie Youn

2023-11-04 01:24:57 UTC

As a first-year college student in 2023, the usage of technology in both finding a partner and maintaining a romantic relationship is more intertwined than ever. Because it’s such a transitional period of our lives, many of the people I know are looking for more casual relationships – most of them have turned to online dating apps like Tinder and Hinge as a result. I do believe that technology can be used to find deeper connections and long-term relationships; however, I agree with Sherry Turkle’s perspective that just because technology widens the range of people we can meet doesn’t necessarily mean that we’ll develop better connections. I think it’s much easier to fake interest or “ghost” people when you’re not with them in person.

On the other hand, I think technology can help with maintaining a romantic relationship. The Communicative Interdependence Theory aligns with my own experiences of being in a relationship, especially as a teenager. Since the time you spend with your significant other is limited by many factors (ex. not having a car/license, school/work/life balance, etc.), texting and other forms of online communication can often be the main way of communicating with your partner. I also feel like there’s a level of trust and closeness that you get with communicating with people online; it’s a way of showing that you want to continue talking to them even if they’re not directly next to you. I find that once I start sending memes/posts to people, it’s a sign that I’ve grown closer to them since certain things I see online remind me of whoever I’m sending the post to.

Chloe Christner

2023-11-04 03:16:48 UTC

For finding a partner I agree with the “liquid love” theoretical perspective. It states that individualism and tech advances have “liquified” the security of long term, committed love. Dating apps make dating more like a video game, swiping left and right on someones profile, and less serious. It is easy to connect with someone, by sending them a dm or a text. If you aren’t vibing with someone, you can just not answer, unadd or block them. Technology like dating apps, phones and social media make it easy to keep to have options. You can be snapping multiples people at once. If you do have a relationship but break up, you can easily get on a dating app or social media site and have plenty of new options at your fingertips. It can be a good and bad thing for relationships.

For maintaining a romantic relationship I agree with the Communicative Interdependence Theory. This theory states that integrating face to face (FTF) and computer-mediated communication (CMC) together is associated with high relationship satisfaction. Face to face communication is very important but computer mediated communication makes a relationship stronger. The best relationships have both aspects.

Fin Liu

fzliu — 2023-11-04 04:40:53 UTC

It has been found that technology can both benefit and hinder relationships. Technology can be beneficial for relationships. I like the idea that technology helps couples communicate more efficiently and be connected with each other even when they are apart. It allows people to find people that they would not find otherwise. It is definitely extremely beneficial especially to long distance relationships, giving them a medium to communicate and interact. It can also, however, be harmful. Technology leads to less trust in relationships. It is much easier to get jealous. Technology is at our fingertips, and sometimes we may worry that our partner is texting other people. With social media, there are so many pretty people that one may feel insecure about themselves. People also often “slide into DMs”, and they often direct message quite a few people. There exist accounts on social media where people claim that they are going to “catch cheaters in the act”, and will see if people’s partners DM(direct message) them and try to hook up with them instead of their original partner. Tone is difficult over text. It is hard to tell what people mean with their reactions over text. It might lead to problems with communication and make people think things that are not true. This is why sometimes tone indicators are used in text message conversations. When I see people meet online, I do not often see too many very positive relationships forming. People online typically enjoy hooking up, or just end up being friends or ghosting each other. Ghosting-when people text with someone and then just cut contact-is very common online. It often occurs when people do not want to contact someone anymore, or do not vibe with someone anymore.

Georgia Klass

GeorgiaKlass — 2023-11-04 06:31:17 UTC

When finding a partner, technology can increase the efficiency of finding someone you like. In recent years, as dating apps have become more popular, more people are experimenting with them. I believe that the impact of technology on finding a partner can be both positive and negative. The use of technology to find a partner can allow an individual to meet a greater breadth of people, however, it can also lead to more superficial relationships/connections. Oftentimes, dating apps, social media, and other forms of technology can be used solely to find someone to “hookup” with, however, that is not always the case.

Throughout my friends, I have seen some individuals using technology to find a committed, long-term relationship, while I have seen others looking to find someone to have some form of uncommitted intimacy with. Although dating apps make meeting people much more accessible and, therefore, convenient, everyone on dating apps is looking for different things. Additionally, people present themselves differently online than in real life, meaning that you could get to know a “fake” person.

When maintaining a romantic relationship, technology can be both toxic and helpful. When in a long-distance relationship or spending time apart, it can be helpful to communicate through social media apps, text messages, phone calls, and more. However, an issue with technology is that it can often mask the way that your partner truthfully acts. For example, the way someone may text may be interpreted incorrectly, which could lead to a fight, thus causing issues within the relationship.

Miles Linde

mlinde5 — 2023-11-04 06:38:13 UTC

I've really found that every single theoretical perspective we've learned about this week had some merit, but I tend to find myself more in agreement with the negative perspectives towards technology's connection with finding love. I think in modern society, it's important to be able to handle the technological side of a relationship due to technology's integration into our day-to-day lives, but that integration usually has negative effects on our overall romantic relationship satisfaction. I definitely align with Turkle's "Connected but Alone" theory with the idea that though technology connects us to more people constantly, it makes us feel less connected, as I find people are less authentic online or over text than they would be in person. That being said, it is important to note dating apps have increased everyone's ability to pursue love and have increased the number of people one would ever have access to date, which I believe somewhat lessens the negative impact of technology when finding love. For couples already in love, I find myself agreeing with the Communicative Interdependence Theory, as couples in modern times probably have an easier time maintaining relationships such as long-distance relationships with the ability to hang out on FaceTimes or play games over the internet despite the miles separating them.

Yasmeena Sharif

2023-11-04 06:38:44 UTC

I think that the Communicative Interdependence Theory, combining FTF and CMC is the theory that I have seen works best in real life. In my day-to-day interactions with people, even in nonromantic relationships, I regularly combine FTF and CMC. Outside of the obvious, using CMC when you can't see the other person in person, I also regularly use CMC when I am hanging out with my friends in person. For example, we often watch movies, or play online games together, even while we are enjoying each other's physical company. I think that in today's steadily changing world, as people are not able to see each other as often, and spend a lot of time on their phones, people are using CMC even when they are in the presence of other people. So in my opinion, the Communicative Interdependence Theory is the theory that I have seen incorporated the best into practical life.

melody wu

wumelody1 — 2023-11-04 23:27:58 UTC

Liquid love is the perspective that most align with what i’ve seen around me.

In a world connected by technology, the idea of "Liquid Love" defines how we approach relationships in the age of dating apps and internet connections. We view relationships like we view and choose products, constantly seeking the "better" option.

When relationships face challenges, people tend to abandon them rather than invest time and effort in fixing them.

While technology helps to bridge physical barriers and enhance communication, it also introduces new problems. These platforms provide too many connections and they can be rid of with one click. While this has the potential to extend perspectives, it may also result in shallow relatiionships. Commitment might be difficult to come by since there are so many options, and physical attractiveness can occasionally take precedence over deeper compatibility.

Caroline Mikes

2023-11-05 06:47:47 UTC

I think the perspective of liquid love stood out most to me. I agree that the newfound abundance of options through online dating has made people less appreciative of what they have. I think it has also ultimately slowed down the traditional course of intimacy. While it may appear that things move faster due to the increased ability for constant communication and conversation, I think it slows the development of true intimacy built through face to face interaction, and thus lessens the bonds between partners in earlier stages. It is much harder to get attached to someone when the majority of interactions occur online in which they are very easily replaceable. Even sex is more easily replaced as well. Furthermore, when issues do arise, they are easier to ignore or avoid. People can be blocked without second thought. And with the abundance of technology, I think it can be easier to keep romantic interactions in a separate sphere from your personal life while in the past they were most likely intertwined as partners met within a shared social sphere. All of these realities create the perfect conditions for facilitating the liquid love we discussed and I see the impacts in my and many of my friends’ lives. While it is rare to find someone who has never had some kind of romantic relation, it is much easier to find people that have never had established romantic relationships defined in these terms. Instead the majority of people move from one romantic pursuit or talking stage to the next, experiencing many of these, but fewer instances of deep romantic intimacy.

Caroline Mikes

2023-11-05 06:49:56 UTC

Michael Blasi

mblasi5 — 2023-11-05 21:51:21 UTC

I feel that the concept of “Liquid Love” resonates most with my experience and many of my friend's experiences when it comes to dating. With the rising prominence of social media and dating apps, it almost feels that everyone is replaceable due to the extremely vast amount of options available nowadays, leading to dating feeling more like an endless chore rather than something fun and exciting. While at the baseline, we are still trying to find a significant other with whom we connect on an intimate level, societal and dating norms have made it so much harder to attain that level of a relationship leading to liquid love being utilized. While Liquid Love in some ways makes it easier to find partners, it encourages us to look at love through a superficial eye, ultimately being extremely negative for the mental health of both ourselves and others, especially because when looking through this superficial eye, it’s much more difficult to establish a long-lasting relationship, because you are always keeping another eye open for something bigger and better than the current relationship one is in. Over time this cycle impinges upon the time needed to develop important bonds with people and make lasting relationships happen.

Parker Taylor

parkerta3 — 2023-11-06 10:08:57 UTC

For both finding a partner and maintaining a romantic relationship, I think that various theories find their place in the mechanisms and discourse of how technology influences and can take part within these romantic processes. I think that Caughlin and Sharabi’s communicative interdependence theory, for example, definitely holds true in the relationships and romantic processes I have seen around me. Especially in more temporally mature relationships such as that of my parents, technology has introduced many unique aspects into their relationship that can lead to interesting new nuances and intricacies to how they interact with one another on a day-to-day basis. Using technology in this way alongside and integrated with face-to-face interaction represents a method to add a sense of ‘freshness’ to a relationship and could also potentially make a dulling relationship more multifaceted as well with more modes of interaction being brought into the picture. Technology, I think, also allows couples to be more selective and particular about the level of interaction they feel like conducting on a certain day – for example, if one member is in a bad mood, sick, or doesn’t feel like meeting up in-person, technology allows for a more leisurely and physically distanced mode of communication that can still keep the relationship active during these times and only to the level of activity that each individual couple defines to be right. This ease of access to many levels of interaction can definitely contribute to the healthy maintenance of a relationship especially during more tumultuous periods, and can also help in the process of taking the partner search at one’s own pace.

This week, we've talked about statistics, causes, effects, and attempted solutions to the divorce rate in the United States. What do you think couples can do to lessen the emotional impact of a divorce on themselves and their families?

eshimada1 — 2023-11-06 23:00:48 UTC

Bridget Wang

bmwang1 — 2023-11-07 18:47:33 UTC

I think communication is key. I think it would be really beneficial for people who are divorcing to have as many conversations as possible. Those conversations could be about anything, but mainly, it could help couples end their relationship on amicable terms while also helping them set boundaries for the future. In cases where possessions or kids are involved, communication can help clarify the division of property and time to the kid(s). There are situations where communication should be avoided, like if it’s a dangerous situation for one or both partners to keep in contact; however, if it’s possible, I think conversations that clear the air can be pretty helpful. Additionally, I think the gradual removal of a person from their respective families could also lessen the emotional impact of divorce. Instead of a sudden disappearance of a person from their lives, it could be beneficial for family members if the partner gradually appears less often. Hopefully, it will give everyone more time to process what is going on and give them a chance to say their goodbyes as well.

Julia Kirsh

jkirsh4 — 2023-11-08 00:30:59 UTC

Personally, I think that communication is the most important aspect that lessens the impact of a divorce on both themselves and their family. I am going to go more into what exactly I mean by communication, but one thing that I want to make clear is that communication and divorces as a whole can be caused by a wide variety of things and therefore, every situation is different and every pair handles it differently. But, personally I think that if a couple is getting divorced, communication to their family is extremely important. I feel like in movies and modern media, you see parents trying to soften the situation for their children instead of letting them in on reality. Although it may seem easier to just say that “you are taking a break” or something of that sort to your kids, it leads the children to hold onto a false hope that their parents will be getting back together. I think that it is important for parents to effectively communicate to their children what is happening, catered to their age, in order to be sure that the individual familial relationships continue to thrive. In addition, if the situation allows, it is important for partners that have kids to be communicating in regards to their children’s lives. Both parents should be up to date on milestones, fights, and events that occur in their children's lives when the children are with the other partner. Effective communication is one of the most important and essential ways that can lessen the impact of a divorce.

Mei Higashi

mjhigash — 2023-11-08 02:45:18 UTC

There are many arbitrary ways to prevent harmful outcomes from divorce, but I’d like to focus on three main topics - the communication style, asset division, and support systems during the process of divorce. In terms of the couple themselves, therapy and open lines of communication are necessary to prevent or mitigate resentment and conflict in the future. Verbal therapy has proved itself as a useful tool for both individuals and couples to release frustrations and concerns about the entire process, as well as an option for surrounding family members (ex. Children, step children, and related family members). I also believe that asset division and the communication of such results are important to good conduct during a divorce or separation. Families are often misinformed or “in the dark” about various asset decisions, and I feel that keeping children aware of the situation and involved in the discussion could prevent the feeling of secrecy or separation from the parents. Lastly, I find that having clear plans for support systems during and after the process is important. Friends and other family members can offer great guidance and even simple conversations that help with the mental strain that an emotional situation like divorce or separation can cause.

Chloe Christner

2023-11-08 19:57:26 UTC

What the couple does after divorce differs on if they have kids or not. If the couple has kids, they should stay on good terms. Despite whatever happened in the marriage that led to divorce, they should be civil and communicate for the sake of the kids. This will help lessen the negative emotional impact on the children. If the couple communicates, then that keeps the children from having to get involved and play mediator. Another thing they can do is keeping the childrens life as similar to what it was before as possible. Divorce means seperate houses which can be stressful on the child so the parents can try to live close to eachother so the children can stay at the same school and keep their same routine and be able to see both parents. One alternative Ive heard of is called nesting. The children stay in the home and then the parents alternate in and out of the house. This keeps the stress of having to go back and forth from house to house on the parents instead of the kids. This would probably have the lowest emotional impact because the kids wont have to move into a separate house and can maintain their life exactly as it was before. The couple should go to therapy, whether they have kids or not. This will help lessen the emotional impact of a divorce on themselves.

Hannah Poulter

2023-11-09 01:13:36 UTC

In terms of lessening the emotional impact of divorce for their families, I feel as though a focus on co-parenting (if they have shared children) is a paramount issue. Creating a real plan of how to keep their child(ren) in the foreground whilst navigating a divorce may promote a healthier relationship between both parents and the children. In order to reduce the emotional impact for the partners themselves, communication is undoubtedly key. Communication is most likely going to be impaired, even if only slightly, as the process of a divorce goes on and so it’s important that, when it does occur, that it’s respectful and open towards the other partner so as not to create unnecessary tension between them or for other family members. Furthermore, communication can ensure both parties are on the same regarding the divorce itself and that prevents any distasteful surprises which could cause anger or sadness if not previously disclosed. Finally, I feel as though many couples going through a divorce are hesitant to hire professional support such as counsellors or therapist to assist in the process and go through it alone which can add to the emotional strain immensely.

Kasandra Santiago

kasandra17 — 2023-11-09 04:36:35 UTC

I think one of the biggest things couples can do to lessen the emotional impact of a divorce on themselves and their families is to first make sure that divorce is the absolute correct way for them to go. I think not only the children but the parents could really be negatively affected by choosing divorce then realizing it wasn’t the right thing and having to make that drastic change of getting together again because it not only is confusing for them but for their kids. Secondly, I think that emphasizing self love and love for their children more in the process of getting divorced as young kids especially tend to think divorce might be due to them adding stress to the relationship and emphasizing love for their kids might help ease those doubts and make them realize no amount of love towards them is changing. Additionally, I think court ordered times for the parents might seem harsh but it can help stabilize things for the kids, as they don’t have to be going through the troubles of hearing fights over when what parent gets to have the kid. With court ordered times for each parent the children will b e more stable and can get used to the schedule faster than if they are always carrying times and nothing is stable. I think both the children and the parents, if needed, should go to therapy to talk about the situation as well, to ensure that mental health is prioritized.

Thompson Phan

thompsonphan — 2023-11-09 04:40:24 UTC

Divorce is a situation that affects many families across the globe. The after-effects of it can be daunting for those who involved, including children. One way to lessen the emotional impact would be to have a nice and healthy divorce. One that is more of a mutual agreement than one that is messy and full of rage. If you have children, make their well-being a priority and seeking professional help would show them that you still prioritize them and their emotions.

Suede Sanders

suedesan — 2023-11-09 17:31:42 UTC

I think that the easiest way to keep things respectful with the couple as well as the family after divorce is communication. When things are left unsaid, its easy for people to fill those gaps in with the worst things possible. Particularly when children are involved, respectful communication is vital for maintaining a consistent co-parenting environment and is essential for their well-being. Children often look up to their parents as role models, so when parents engage in negative talk or constant conflicts, it can be emotionally confusing and distressing for them. Effective communication not only helps heal the wounds of the marriage but also paves the way for a more respectful post-divorce relationship. It sets the foundation for healthy co-parenting, which is vital for the stability and emotional security of the children. When parents are on amicable terms and communicate openly, it creates a stable and predictable environment for the children. This consistency helps them adjust to the new family dynamic more smoothly and reduces anxiety and confusion. Without clear communication and collaboration in co-parenting, boundaries can become blurred, and specificities regarding the children's needs and routines may be overlooked, potentially leading to future disagreements and misunderstandings. In addition, seeking family/couple therapy as well as legal support can help with those conversations, issues and boundaires that can be solved on your own.

Dor Peretz

peretzdor1 — 2023-11-09 21:02:36 UTC

I think the most important thing for couples to lessen the emotional impact of a divorce on themselves and their families is to make use of their support systems. Although divorce has become more acceptable and seen as less extreme since the late 20th century, I’d say that people still fear being judged or stigmatized as a result of their decision to get divorced. Beyond that, I’ve noticed a tendency in American culture to stray away from discussing emotionally challenging topics. This lends to couples feeling uncomfortable with openly discussing their divorce even with their close friends/family/support system. Considering this, I’d say the main thing that would help couples going through a divorce is to destigmatize the idea of divorce in their own minds, so that they feel more comfortable talking about it and receiving support. Additionally, considering it might still be difficult to get beyond shameful feelings during a divorce, another helpful avenue could be therapy, which can be good for people to talk about their feelings as it involves opening up to someone qualified but not personally connected to one’s life. Obviously therapy can be expensive so it is not a privilege that everyone can afford, but if it is affordable for a family in question, it is a good option for both the couple and the kids in the family who are affected by the divorce to let out their feelings there and work through their struggles in an environment that feels comfortable and caring.

melody wu

wumelody1 — 2023-11-10 06:03:38 UTC

Divorce, in my opinion, is a difficult and emotionally charged process that may have a significant impact not just on their partner but also on their families and especially children. Maintaining open and honest communication is very important. Couples should create a secure environment for coommunication so that they can share their concerns, thoughts, and worries without fear of being judged. Clear communication helps in understanding each other's points of view and perspectives

Prioritizing the well-being of their children is the most important part. It is critical to protect children from conflict and to make them feel loved and supported during the change. Collaborative co-parenting, in which both parents stay active in their children's life, creates stability and emotional security, which can help to mitigate the emotional damage, and that’s a way to lessen the emotional impact.

Falcon Fu

2023-11-10 18:58:24 UTC

I think the most effective way for couples to lessen the emotional impact of a divorce is communication skills. This could include a wide range of things such as therapy, talk between family members and so on. For the first one, therapy is definitely a useful mean for one to get back to a normal mental state and find ways to deal with ongoing challenges. It is also a chance for couples experiencing this phase to talk to a professional about things that might be difficult to others. For the second one, I think it will be very useful after one side of the relationship went to therapy sessions and then talk to their family members. For example, one parent can talk to his or her child/ children about the ongoing situation and be prepared to lessen the impact of this divorce to his or her child/children. Another things couple should do is decrease their arguments. Sometimes it is easy for couples at the end of their relationship to have a lot of opinions on each other. They could argue a lot and build quite negative image of themselves on the other side and their families. The better way is to control themselves and treat everyone including the other side of the relationship well.

Nicole Leihe

2023-11-10 23:29:17 UTC

I think couples going through a divorce should definitely prioritize young children first in their divorce. Because children's minds and perceptions of love and the world are still developing, a poor portrayal of their parent's marriage and subsequent divorce could result in children carrying a negative view of love and relationships for the rest of their life, which may take a lot to dismantle. Before finalizing and going through with a divorce, couples should ensure that there is a strong set of support systems in place for their children, such as therapy, relatives, and more. If possible, cohabitation would also be a much healthier option for families, as the constant absence of one parent and/or continuously switching residences every week at a young age can be a source of confusion and frustration for young children. Additionally, I think it'd be important for couples to keep their issues private amongst themselves. While there should be clear, mutual communication to their families about the divorce and the reasons behind it, it can be incredibly unhealthy if members of their family were forced to "choose sides" in their relationship or used as ways to validate different sides of an argument in the divorce. Essentially in young children who don't know any better, these kind of divisions can ruin relationships with one or more of their parents and result in a number of trauma and mental issues in the future.

Sage Shimabukuro

2023-11-11 01:30:54 UTC

Divorce is an inherently emotional process, often extending its impact beyond the couple to affect people outside the relationship. To mitigate the emotional toll, open and honest communication is key. Regardless of the relationship's nature, transparency is essential. Regular discussions about concerns and expectations can help prevent misunderstandings. Seeking professional help should not be stigmatized or overlooked. It's perfectly acceptable for couples to consider therapy, including group therapy. Therapists can equip individuals with a variety of tools to navigate the complex emotions associated with divorce. Group therapy, in particular, can enhance communication between both parties, fostering a more cooperative atmosphere during this challenging time. It's vital to acknowledge the uniqueness of each and every divorce. People get divorced for all kinds of different reasons, and there's no one-size-fits-all approach to healing. One important thing is having a strong support group. Family and friends provide a vital lifeline, offering a sympathetic ear and emotional support to help individuals navigate their distinctive path to recovery. By approaching divorce with empathy and a commitment to personal well-being, individuals and their families can better navigate the challenges and emerge from the experience with greater emotional resilience. This comprehensive approach can help mitigate the emotional impact of divorce, promoting healing and growth.

Thomas Bittencourt

tbittenc — 2023-11-11 03:48:16 UTC

The best thing couples can do is communicate. While each divorce is different, communication helps in just about every scenario and, if done right, should never cause more harm. The reasons for a divorce could be complicated, which is why establishing a common consensus between the parties involved is so important! This results in a less "messy" divorce and would leave families out of potential drama or lasting effects. Children especially are vulnerable to the negative effects of divorce, so it's up to the parents to clearly explain it to them and ensure that the transition isn't too shocking or all of a sudden.

Michael Blasi

mblasi5 — 2023-11-11 05:53:12 UTC

I think it’s extremely important to introduce this issue in little bite-size pieces, especially for children who generally get hit the hardest by divorce. It can be extremely traumatic hearing your parents fight as a child and then later have to choose which one to live with inside of a courtroom. Therefore, despite a couple's differences when going through a divorce, I feel that it’s so important to little by little introduce the topic to their children instead of hitting them with it like a freight train, as this will only lead to significant emotional damage. Additionally, perhaps it may be a good idea to just have as many conversations as possible regarding a possible divorce because it could genuinely help the situation no matter how difficult these conversations may be. At the end of the day, “communication is key” isn’t just a saying, it’s extremely good advice and in my personal experience has saved relationships I’ve been in countless times just having a completely honest and straightforward conversation. While this may be futile, I feel that a lot of the time, couples who divorce tend to constantly fight and be stubborn in their own way without hearing the other side out to a full extent. So for that, open communication is imperative.

Caroline Mikes

2023-11-12 00:22:48 UTC

I think that divorce is difficult no matter what, but consistent and productive communication is key to minimizing damage. I thought it was very interesting that they were saying that the kids that have the most difficult time are actually the ones that’s parents didn’t fight in front of them and they therefore felt blind sighted by the divorce. Finding a balance between oversharing with your children or placing your own grievances and issues on them vs. just brushing things under the rug is hard, but key. It’s really easy to choose one side or the other - making your kid a therapist or just telling them nothing - but I think these are both harmful. Similarly, avoiding villainizing your ex spouse to your children is really important, especially if they will continue to be a part of the kid’s life. Kids are already losing a lot through divorce, and destroying the perception they have of their other parent, in relation to your own issues, is yet another blow. (Obviously, if they have their own issues, that’s different). But ruining your kid’s relationship with them as some kind of revenge or power tactic is ultimately just harmful to your child. People need as much support and love as possible during this time. Therefore, clarity and openness as well as maturity and grace is the foundation to healthy healing after divorce.

Aadya Nijhawan

2023-11-12 05:29:13 UTC

Getting through a divorce is certainly a tough and emotional process, and careful consideration and measures are required to reduce the impact on oneself and family members.

Open communication: Maintaining open and true communication with your spouse is required throughout the process. Discussing one’s feelings, expectations, concerns to ensure a mutual understanding.

Professional support: Seeking the support and assistance of a trained therapist to help understand emotions and challenges of divorce.

Cooperative Co-Parenting:

Fostering a cooperative co-parenting relationship and focusing on the well-being of the children. This can be effective by creating a parenting plan that highlights the responsibilities of both the parents so as to ensure involvement of both the parents.

Respect and empathy:

Respect is key. By maintaining respect for one another the tension that comes along with divorce can be eased. Additionally, even empathy can be practiced by understanding the other person’s perspective.

Focus on self-care:

Practicing self-care during and after the divorce. This includes exercising, nutrition and sleep.

Maintaining social network:

Relying on friends and family for emotional support.

Victoria Ortiz

vickieortiz2004 — 2023-11-12 22:18:08 UTC

I think the most important thing is to be as mature as possible. In the scenario of divorce, there is often a lot of sadness, anger, guilt, or resentment involved that can cause people to act immaturely and not take others feelings into consideration, including their partner’s feelings or their family’s feelings. People will make impulsive decisions, fight in front of their children, or talk badly about the other person to their own kids. Not only does this immaturity affect the outcome and intensity of the separation, but it also may traumatize the children involved. Both partners handling the divorce process with maturity allows for smart and controlled decision-making, while taking into consideration how to protect your children.

From what I have seen with friends and some of my family members, if someone experiences their parents’ messy divorce throughout their childhood, they are likely to mirror this relationship when they are older. They will see toxicity and immaturity in a relationship as normal and will have a hard time committing to a healthy relationship. This does not mean that staying in a relationship that no longer serves you will help your children in the future, it just means that you have to be as mature and empathetic as possible when processing a divorce. It is so important to take care of oneself and also be the parents that your children need in such a difficult time.

Yasmeena Sharif

2023-11-13 07:29:21 UTC

I think to lessen the emotional impact of a divorce on themselves and their families, couples can try to work on their communication tactics, and if that proves unsuccessful, have a third-party mediator. I think that when people get caught up in their emotions, especially when going through the divorce process, they say things that may regret later, and they may harbor a lot of anger toward their partner. If the couple has children, then this may have a negative effect on them, and a lot of arguing also does not contribute to a productive environment either. Communication is, I think, the best way to lessen the emotional impact of a divorce -- if both parties can try to be clear about what their needs are, and if they are unable to communicate, use a third-party to aid them in that process.

Fin Liu

fzliu — 2023-11-13 20:10:20 UTC

One thing that couples could do to lessen that emotional impact of a divorce on themselves and their families is to go to therapy. Family therapy and couples therapy could be beneficial. The divorced couples could learn how to coexist or co-parent if they experienced problems. They should address the problems before making the divorce official. If they are fighting all the time, then they should get to the root of why that is. They should handle it in a mature way. They should listen to each other and try to understand where the other person is coming from. If children are involved, the parents could explain why they no longer want to be married, and that it is not their fault. They should let the children know what the situation is without making everything very sudden. Everything should be a gradual transition, so that everyone has time to get used to it. Both parties should set boundaries, what each person is okay with going forward.

Orr Bar-Yossef

baryosse — 2023-11-13 20:42:30 UTC

Divorce can be a very emotionally-taxing experience on both a couple and their families. However, some strategies can help manage the stress that divorce creates. Open communication within the divorcing couple as well as between the couple and the rest of their family is important. Taking the time to listen to one another and understand the other person’s perspective and emotions can help both people involved in the divorce to maintain a healthy relationship and make the divorce as smooth as possible. If the couple has children, it’s important for them to honestly communicate with their children about their divorce and let the children be involved in decisions that impact them. One of the main issues that often comes with divorce is managing co-parenting. Creating a stable co-parenting plan from the beginning will benefit both the parents and the children. Both parents should be consistent with their co-parenting schedule in order to provide as much stability for their children as possible. Respecting their children’s opinions in creating a co-parenting plan is also important as their children should feel heard and supported. Lastly, both parties involved should turn to their support systems for emotional, physical, and mental support. This could be their family, friends, or even professionals who can listen to them and help them through this hardship.

On Monday, we watched this video from the CDC talking about what IPV is, and 6 policies/practices we can do as a nation to prevent it. What are the strengths and potential weaknesses of their current approach? What else needs to be taken into account?

eshimada1 — 2023-11-13 20:46:23 UTC

1. Who is in your group? 2. When would you like to present (Mon. 11/27 or Wed. 11/29)? 3. What piece of media will you be presenting on?

eshimada1 — 2023-11-13 20:49:13 UTC

Leilani Mate

lmate4 — 2023-11-13 20:51:57 UTC

To lessen the emotional impact of a divorce, I think the best course of action is to be open and honest in communication between the couple and family members, especially children. Part of the emotional stress caused by divorce is the uncertainty, which harbors negative feelings for both parties. By engaging in conversation and keeping open communication when possible, the couple is able to have a clear understanding of each other’s intentions and feelings. It is also important for parents to communicate with their children. Of course, young children might be unable to understand the legal intricacies of divorce, but it is still important for them to be honest about the situation so that it doesn’t lead to the kids having false hopes that will harm them emotionally. Another important method of lessening the emotional impact of divorce is practicing self-care and taking care of your mental health. Divorce can make all parties involved feel extremely stressed, anxious, or depressed. Positive coping strategies like meditating, journaling, exercising, etc. can help alleviate these feelings. Couples can also seek support from others to lessen the emotional impact. They can talk to trusted loved ones or other family and friends who can support their mental well-being. Another option is talking to a therapist who can give an additional perspective and help them maintain their mental health. At the end of the day, every divorce is different and certain strategies may work better for different couples.

Julia Kirsh

jkirsh4 — 2023-11-14 04:04:07 UTC

The six different practices that our nation can do as a whole to prevent IPV does a decent job as a generally encompassing different ways that IPV can be prevented, but, realistically, they do not really consider circumstances. For example, creating protective environments can lead to even more harm for IPV victims. Although creating these protective environments are great, it's hard to know what exactly these protective environments entail. Are these environments places where people go to talk about their IPV encounters and then still go back home to their violent partners? Are these places for people to sleep and escape their partners? Are they places for people to talk about their IPV experiences after they have already safely left their relationship? I think it is hard to really dig deeply into the weaknesses because these “protective environments” are so broad. If these environments are to “prevent”, that means that they should exist before someone encounters violence with their partner, but partners are unaware and ignorant that their partner may become violent, likely because they are in the “love bombing” phase of their relationship. Why would someone want to go to one of these environments before they have encountered any violence? In addition, if these protective environments are for people who are currently in violent relationships, it is really challenging for them to safely escape the relationship for a short period of time. The issue with these violent relationships is that the violent partner begins to become controlling, such as requesting their partner's location, and does not want them seeing certain people. To find an “excuse” to escape and go to a protective environment is a really challenging thing to do without initiating even more violence. The most ideal situation for a protective environment would be if someone was permanently leaving a violent relationship with no plans on going back or seeking help or professional assistance after already leaving. If someone is planning on going back to their partner and their partner finds out they were at one of these protective environments or even “a friends house” (an excuse) it may anger them even more and therefore lead to more violence.

Miles Linde

mlinde5 — 2023-11-14 07:36:21 UTC

I think that it's such a difficult question to answer, because, as you often say in lectures... "it depends!"

In one regard, it seems best that couples remain on relatively good terms during and after a divorce, especially if the couple has a kid or multiple kids to look after together (even if not given joint custody). It is seemingly beneficial for a kid to not randomly and suddenly have a major figure in their life disappear or have their two parents instantaneously stop communicating with one another. To properly co-parent a child, communication is needed on a healthy basis, and both parents deserve some say on how the other parent parents a kid they are the father or mother of.

That being said, sometimes it's not that easy! In certain cases of abuse especially, it might be less emotionally damaging to have the abuser disappear from the family's life than to try to keep them involved. The same could be said about an addict or neglectful parent.

Similarly, I believe the amount of communication a kid should receive about their parents' divorce depends on age, maturity, and how much they knew about the conflict between their parents before the divorce. I usually side with the side of clear and thorough communication, but depending on the kid, communication could damage their lives MORE. It is interesting to see that divorces are more likely in relationships where one of the partners is a child of a divorced parent.

Thomas Bittencourt

tbittenc — 2023-11-15 03:50:38 UTC

Just as a refresher, the six strategies noted by the CDC include: teaching safe and healthy relationship skills, engaging influential adults and peers, disrupting developmental pathways toward partner violence, creating protective environments, strengthening economic supports for families, and supporting survivors to increase safety and lessen harms. The strengths in this approach lie in its preventative measures and ways to support those who have faced IPV. The best way to combat this issue is teaching people the healthy skills needed in a relationship to manage conflicts or talk to other people who can support you and aid in recovery. What also needs to be taken into account would be ways of reaching those who don't realize fully that they are in a violent (or soon-to-be) relationship and helping them out.

Rosy Almanzar

2023-11-15 21:11:49 UTC

Although I do believe that there are policies and preventive practices that can be taken to decrease IPV, overall I disagree with the CDC that this is something that is something that is one hundred percent preventable. Some weaknesses is that a lot of IPV probably does go unreported making it so a lot of the post operative actions are not 100% effective. Even so, making it difficult to know if it's too late to implement preventative measures. Moreover, it is one thing to enact these preventative measures but it’s another for them to actually work. People can have all the right skills to escape and avoid IPV but if they refuse to be receptive then there’s only so much that providing them the skills can do for them. Additionally, to implement these six policies/practices it takes time and most importantly resources. For policies/practices such as strengthening economic support for families can be really unrealistic for families in lower SES. Creating protective environments is also something that could be very costly. Some strengths include that a lot of people who find themselves experiencing IPV are at a loss whether it be because they're unsure of what to do or just shock. But if they're able to learn about IPV before and build skills and support systems it could make it much easier for people who find themselves in these situations to escape.

mjhigash — 2023-11-16 01:29:55 UTC

Mei Higashi and Falcon Fu
Prefer Wednesday slot!
We will be analyzing Twilight movie

baryosse — 2023-11-16 01:47:12 UTC

1. Orr Bar-Yossef, Leilani Mate, Suede Sanders

2. We prefer Wednesday

3. To All the Boys I've Loved Before

melody wu

wumelody1 — 2023-11-16 06:58:27 UTC

The CDC does a good job at providing valuable resources, research, and guidelines to raise awareness, prevent IPV, and support survivors. Creating a protective space for IPV victims is crucial, but their recommendation to "create a safe space" could be one of the flaws. For IPV victims, creating a safe haven is essential, but sometimes it's not a possibility because of circumstances beyond their control. Social pressures, anxiety, and economic reliance may make it more difficult for them to create a safe atmosphere. Creating all-encompassing solutions to serve IPV survivors requires an understanding of these issues.

Chloe Christner

cchristn — 2023-11-16 18:57:57 UTC

Chloe Christner, Maya Lewis, Georgia Klass
Preferably Wednesday
We will be analyzing The Notebook

Dor Peretz

peretzdor1 — 2023-11-16 20:38:52 UTC

The strength of these 6 practices is that they are targeting various different aspects of the issue, thereby preventing IPV holistically. For example, strengthening economic support for families deals with an economic form of prevention, whereas teaching safe and healthy relationship skills is an educational form of prevention. Addressing the issue of IPV prevention through various avenues is a strength because it reinforces prevention on multiple grounds and through that, the risk of IPV decreases. However, I think there are still weaknesses in these practices, specifically in how their broadness allows them to be misexecuted, or executed ineffectively. For instance with regards to teaching safe and healthy relationship skills, there may be debates about what is safe and healthy, or certain state education systems may only allow certain things to be taught in their education programs. In that case, healthy relationship skills may not really be taught in a sex ed/relationship classes. The goal of creating protective environments can also be interpreted differently, and could therefore be executed in a way that isn’t conducive towards preventing violence in relationships. For example, some areas view safety and protection as higher policing, whereas other areas view protection as not just reliant on heavier policing. Differing political views leading to different interpretations of the 6 goals/practices therefore lessens their effectiveness. Perhaps a fix for this would be more specification in the goals, to provide different areas with more clear and consistent plans to execute for the sake of preventing IPV.

Dor Peretz

peretzdor1 — 2023-11-16 21:02:30 UTC

Dor Peretz
Would prefer to present on Wednesday
I will be presenting on Mean Girls

Joan, Bridget

2023-11-17 00:34:36 UTC

Joan Song, Bridget Wang
Wed (11/29)
Little Women

Caroline Mikes

2023-11-17 00:53:24 UTC

I think there is a lot of validity to these prevention points. However, I think it is perhaps lacking in terms of recognition that sometimes it is these places that are supposed to be “safe” that endanger us most. Teaching prevention skills in schools is also important, but again it doesn't properly address the fact that the majority of people that abuse their partners know that their actions are wrong. I think training could focus more on warning signs as well as other strategies than relationship tips. And then I think there should be more emphasis on what to do when you are in this situation. For example, where should you go to talk about your concerns? And what do protection sites really entail? What good is it to have places that are against relationship violence but cannot enact real support for victims, including a place to stay, and physical protection from the abusive partner? I think providing things like free therapy would also be essential to addressing the issue of domestic violence as well. Many victims are in way too deep (mentally and emotionally) to be able to ask for help, much less leave their partner. It takes so much to even get to that point and many people never do. I think free therapy could help give people the place to process their trauma and make real progress rather than getting stuck in these same dangerous cycles.

Victoria Ortiz

vickieortiz2004 — 2023-11-17 02:11:10 UTC

This video created by the CDC is incredibly shallow and fails to take into account the actual experiences of IPV victims. I hate the word “preventable” in the context that it is used. I was really upset when I watched this video and “is preventable” was included in the definition of IPV. Our government does very little to protect IPV and DV victims. Our schools do the bare minimum to teach students about safe and healthy relationship skills. While these “preventive” steps sound effective, are they really effective when the government does little to nothing to fund or work towards implementing these preventive steps? These solutions just aren’t viable and it is hypocritical for the CDC, a federal agency, to label IPV as preventable.

“Mitigating the effects of” would be much better wording when referring to IPV. In my opinion, to mitigate the effects of IPV, the government must fund the organizations that work directly with victims of IPV to help them escape their abusive relationships and provide the most effective care for the individual's situation and background. That should be a “preventive” step but I don’t foresee it being one.

Yasmeena Sharif

2023-11-17 07:05:45 UTC

In my opinion, the current approach of the CDC to IPV has a lot of flaws. One of the 6 points they outline is to support survivors, to increase safety and lessen harms. I wonder how this support would take place, especially when many survivors do not feel safe or comfortable reporting to legal authorities (i.e. the police), especially when these reports are oftentimes not taken seriously. Their point about strengthening economic support for sounds good on the surface, but I also wonder about this -- would that be a government initiative as well? What would be the criterion for receiving this financial support? Already, there are so many low-income families who do not qualify for benefits because "they make too much", or they "work too many jobs", and so I wonder, if this would be a government initiative, how they would make it possible that every family that needs financial support would be able to access those funds. To me, a lot of these feel very idealistic, like they are goals that we absolutely should work towards, but they have no tether to the reality of what it would take to make these policies feasible. Especially for the points about teaching safe and healthy relationships and creating protective environments, I am having a hard time seeing practical ways to implement these on a structural level as opposed to an interpersonal level. I would be interested to see the CDC outline tangible steps to take to implement these goals.

Victoria Ortiz

vickieortiz2004 — 2023-11-17 20:34:23 UTC

Victoria Ortiz
Wednesday (I fly in to LAX at 1pm on Monday)
Elvis and Me (book) + Priscilla (movie)

Nicole, Melody

2023-11-17 21:23:11 UTC

Nicole Leihe & Melody Wu
Wed 11/29
Everything Everywhere All At Once

Nicole Leihe

2023-11-17 21:38:46 UTC

While the CDC's 6 practices to prevent IPV are logical, some of their strategies are incredibly generalized and may not be effective for extreme cases of IPV. For example, the CDC's strategy of "engaging influential adults/peers" can be ineffective when IPV includes isolating a partner away from loved ones and family. This makes it a lot more difficult to try to get support from influential adults/peers and therefore out of a violent domestic situation. Instead of putting the burden of action and reaching out on someone already in an IPV situation, local cities/counties can create local protective environments & shelters where victims can either seek refuge or witnesses can call in incidents of IPV. However, on the opposite end, the CDC's strategy of "disrupt developmental pathways" is one that can really make a change if it is truly implemented. This is because many anger and violence issues during adulthood typically comes from being raised in violent households from a young age. Instead, children should be raised with strong communication skills and in calm environments, and develop skills that will allow them to quickly deescalate possibly tense situations. As a result, they will be significantly less likely to become violent partners (or intimate terrorists) in their adult relationships.

Zoe Hammer

zthammer — 2023-11-17 22:12:21 UTC

After learning more about intimate partner violence, I think one of the strengths of the CDC’s current approach is the teaching of safe and healthy relationship skills. If children and adults continue to grow in an environment where they are shielded from the realities of a healthy relationship, they may struggle to decipher the signs of IPV. Therefore, education on identifying positive and negative engagements within a relationship could help individuals see signs of violence. Additionally, I think strengthening economic support for families in low-income communities could help reduce IPV. As we’ve discussed in class, the family stress model can lead to a lot of unconscious resentment and tension in a relationship that may be displaced into external violence. I agree that the CDC should engage influential adults and peers to fight IPV; however, one weakness of this approach is that depending on who they engage with, it could make the matter become politicalized instead of remaining an issue strictly on human rights. Moreover, I agree that the CDC’s preventative measures may decrease IPV, but I wonder if they could increase a focus on psychiatric counseling and support groups so those in these relationships can get professional help to move away from them.

Sophia Cachay

scachay2 — 2023-11-17 23:09:25 UTC

At first glance, these six practices seem to work cohesively to prevent IPV. From a practice “working to prevent violence in early childhood” to one for “supporting survivors to increase safety and lessen harms,” it seems as though the practices cover IPV wholistically, from upbringing to even after the incidents themselves. However, the practices include many gaps, including the failure to address groups that are disproportionately affected. Granted, IPV affects everyone, but it especially affects some groups harder and more frequently than others, which should be communicated. For instance, women and indigenous groups face IPV at a different level than the general population, and it should also be noted the association between lower SES and higher IPV perpetuation. Although the preventative practices may apply to all of them, it ultimately provides no more support for them, when these are the groups that should be the forefront focus. Additionally, as many others in this padlet have mentioned, the lack of specificity makes these practices hard to gauge and evaluate. That is, the methods and consequences for “strengthening economic support support” may be vastly different from group to group. So in theory, the practices do a fair job of encompassing IPV, but the over-generalization provides no greater help for the groups that are disproportionately impacted.

Jada Griffiths

jadagrif — 2023-11-18 00:25:50 UTC

Micheal, Caroline, Rosie
Wednesday
10 things I hate about you

Jada Griffiths

jadagrif — 2023-11-18 00:26:31 UTC

Micheal, Caroline, Rosie, Jada
Wednesday
10 things I hate about you

kasandra17 — 2023-11-18 00:51:52 UTC

Kasandra Santiago, Sage Shimabukuro, Sophia Cachay
Wednesday 11/29
Love Story by Taylor Swift

2023-11-18 02:57:46 UTC

Zoe Hammer and Julia Kirsh
Wednesday preferably
Greece

thompsonphan — 2023-11-18 04:44:23 UTC

Thompson & Yasmeena
We prefer to go on Wednesday
We will be presenting Cinderella

Tyler Fadi

2023-11-18 06:06:39 UTC

Tyler and Fadi

Scream the movie

Katie, Fin, Parker, Miles

2023-11-18 06:06:45 UTC

Katie, Fin, Parker, Miles
Wed 11/29
The Kissing Booth

Aadya Nijhawan

2023-11-18 06:38:46 UTC

Strengths:

1. Public Awareness: In order to prevent IPV if the CDC is advocating for policies and practices it is probable that it includes raising public awareness. In order to create a culture of intolerance and promote healthy relationships ; it is essential to increase the awareness .

2. Research-Based Interventions: In order to have more effective strategies and policies; CDC’s approach should be iresearch-driven instead of evidence based interventions .

3 Collaboration: In order to prevent IPV; multi-sector collaboration is essential. The initiatives of CDC could be enhanced by developing partnerships with various stakeholders.

Potential Weaknesses:

1. Implementation Challenges: Implementing can be a challenge even with well-designed policies. However the impact is fairly limited if the proposed strategies proposed are not effectively put into practice.

2. Cultural Sensitivity: The cultural factors need to be considered while addressing IPV. The approach is likely to face resistance or be less effective in certain communities if the CDC's approach does not adequately take into account the cultural diversity,

3. Resource Allocation: In order for the programs to be successful ; it is essential to have sufficient funding and resources . The IPV prevention initiatives cannot succeed if the resources are limited.

Additional Considerations:

1. Continued Research: The strategies for IPV prevention must be updated regularly based on new research findings in order for the program to be effective.

2. Education Programs: IPV can be prevented by fostering healthy relationship norms through detailed education programs, starting from early childhood.

3.Support Services: The survivors of IPV must be provided with accessible and effective support services such as shelters, counseling, legal assistance, and other resources.

4. Policy Advocacy: Systemic issues such as economic inequality and gender-based discrimination should be addressed through advocating suitable policies .

Katie Youn

2023-11-18 07:23:24 UTC

I think the CDC’s approach covers a wide area of things needed to prevent IPV. I believe the most important thing to do is to support survivors and educate people on recognizing what IPV is in the first place. By understanding what IPV can look like, people can recognize warning signs before things escalate further or get more dangerous. This, in my opinion, is the most straightforward way to prevent IPV, as many people may not even realize they’re experiencing IPV until it is too late. I think one thing the CDC should take into more consideration is factors like economic hardships and create a more solidified plan for people who may not have the resources to protect themselves. For example, one of the approaches the CDC recommends is to create a protective environment. This may be impossible for some people, especially those at a low SES since they can’t physically remove themselves from a situation. Some people may also just not have supportive family or friends to help them remove themselves from a potentially dangerous situation. To add, safe and healthy relationship skills are teachable, but I am not quite sure how they could prevent IPV – I feel as though most perpetrators of IPV would not stop by simply learning about skills, but by receiving thorough psychological help. In some cases, it may aid in easing IPV but I think it’s too ambitious to say that teaching these skills would prevent IPV altogether.

Suede Sanders

suedesan — 2023-11-18 07:45:10 UTC

While the six practices and policies (the approach of teaching safe and intimate relationship skills, supporting survivors, disrupting developmental pathways toward partner violence, creating protective environments, and strengthening economic supports for families) are important to think about when it comes to the issues of intimate partner violence (IPV), I wouldn't say these practices completely prevent IPV. Empowering individuals with the knowledge and skills to engage in healthy relationships can foster respectful communication and conflict resolution, while supporting survivors through counseling and community resources is crucial for breaking the cycle of violence. Disrupting developmental pathways early in life and creating protective environments contribute to preventing the development of behaviors that may lead to partner violence. Additionally, strengthening economic support for families addresses the role of financial stability in reducing stressors that contribute to domestic violence. However, simply “supporting survivors” and “creating a safe space” don’t do anything to prevent the events from happening in the first place. Offering individual receptiveness to education, limited availability and accessibility of support services, the complexity of identifying and addressing developmental pathways, challenges in fostering widespread cultural and societal change, and the need for a holistic understanding that economic factors are just one aspect of a complex issue. Successful implementation requires a multi-faceted, culturally sensitive, and collaborative effort, with ongoing evaluation and adaptation of strategies to ensure their relevance and effectiveness. I feel like saying IPV is preventable by following these vague practices was misleading.

Georgia Klass

GeorgiaKlass — 2023-11-18 07:45:27 UTC

The video defines intimate partner violence (IPV) as any type of physical violence, sexual violence, stalking, or psychological aggression by current or former spouses, boyfriends, girlfriends, dating partners, or sexual partners. As the video went through 6 potential strategies in order to prevent IPV, I recognized a multitude of strengths and weaknesses within each one.

I thought that teaching safe and healthy relationship skills was a strong strategy to prevent IPV as it helps people to better understand how to act in a relationship and how to treat the person you are having emotional or intimate relations with. However, teaching these types of skills can also be disregarded and ignored, causing people to continue with negative behaviors in relationships. Furthermore, I feel that supporting survivors to increase safety and lessen harms is a helpful strategy for helping those who have experienced IPV, however, it does not help to prevent IPV. This is not a preventative strategy because it does not take into account the person who inflicts the IPV on the other person. Similarly, creating a protective environment allows people to feel comfortable, but cannot prevent what happens behind closed doors. Therefore, this strategy lacks the preventative aspect that is necessary to prevent IPV. Working to prevent violence starting in early childhood is a strong strategy as it has been psychologically proven that what you learn when you are younger is often carried through into adulthood, thus this strategy could act as a preventative measure for IPV. Additionally, strengthening economic support for families could help to decrease the continuation of IPV as it allows the affected partner to leave the negative environment. Lastly, the video mentioned engaging influential peers and adults. This method would be helpful in spreading the message and educating people about IPV.

Thomas Bittencourt

tbittenc — 2023-11-20 22:27:01 UTC

Thomas, Hannah
Wednesday
"Weird Fishes/Arpeggi" by Radiohead

Throughout the semester, and finishing with the COVID-19 pandemic on Monday 11/20, we've talked about how historical events have impacted our views of love and what we do in romantic relationships. Discuss a historical event that we HAVEN'T talked about, that you think has had a profound impact on romantic relationships. Feel free to discuss historical events in or outside of the United States, during any point in the last 200 years.

eshimada1 — 2023-11-20 23:19:08 UTC

Thomas and Hannah

eshimada1 — 2023-11-21 01:21:13 UTC

Hannah and Thomas

Wed

Weird Fishes/Arpegie - Radiohead

Hannah Poulter

2023-11-22 01:02:40 UTC

One event which I believe had a profound impact on romantic relationships, was the terrorist attack on the World Trade Center on 9/11/2001. I believe this to be the case as the event cause extreme trauma, not only for those directly involved, but for everyone watching the events unfold in the news all around the world. In one article I read, it exclaimed that divorce rates decreased in the New York in the year following the attack. In my opinion this may be because, following such an upsetting event, people felt more inclined to cherish their loved ones and perhaps reconsider decisions about ending serious relationships with their partners. This could be due to the fact that, after seeing the impact of loss for other people, they wish to try harder to make their relationships work. Furthermore I think that in times of heightened stress and anxiety, people may seek comfort in their partner leading to increased proximity and therefore intimacy between romantic partners. This may be another reason why divorce rates may have fell following events.

melody wu

wumelody1 — 2023-11-24 23:10:48 UTC

I believe that the HIV/AIDS crisis of the 1980s and 1990s had a long-lasting impact on romantic relationships, reshaping societal attitudes, behaviors, and perceptions of love and intimacy. As the epidemic unfolded, it brought about significant changes in how individuals approached sexual health, communication, and the dynamics of relationships.

One of the most immediate effects of the HIV crisis was the heightened awareness of sexual health risks. The virus was initially associated with the gay community, leading to increased stigmatization and discrimination. This environment compelled people to prioritize conversations about sexual health and safety in their romantic relationships. Couples were forced to discuss and comprehend safe practices, emphasizing the importance of mutual responsibility and care.

As society dealt with this epidemic, it prompted a discussion of relationship dynamics, resulting in a more informed, empathetic, and resilient approach to love and intimacy.

Thompson Phan

thompsonphan — 2023-11-26 00:52:04 UTC

One historical event I wanted to highlight was the 9/11 terrorist attacks. Nearly 3,000 lives were lost and those lives lost were brothers, sisters, husbands, wives, boyfriends, girlfriends, etc. Relationships were incredibly affected by this in many complex ways. The events resulted in so much emotional stress potentially led to increased anxiety and emotional strain. They also could have led to individuals placing a greater importance on personal relationships in fear of losing their loved ones.

Thompson Phan

thompsonphan — 2023-11-26 00:58:30 UTC

One historical event I wanted to highlight were the 9/11 terrorist attacks. Over 3,000 lives were lost and those lives were brothers, sisters, boyfriends, girlfriends, husbands, wives, etc. These tragic events affected romantic relationships in many complex ways. This could have potentially led to increased anxiety and emotional stress. Many individuals could have also potentially placed a greater importance on personal relationships in fear of losing their loved ones.

Nicole Leihe

2023-11-26 04:04:41 UTC

I think that last year's overturning of Roe v Wade and the subsequent restrictive abortion laws that followed definitely had a profound impact on romantic relationship and how people approached love and intimacy, especially in states where restrictive abortion laws were introduced. Without that sense of protection over their own bodily autonomy, people, especially women, have since definitely been more hesitant and cautious in participating in hookup culture. With greater restrictions on abortion, this decision somewhat reverses us backwards in time, slowly gearing and leaning us in the direction of the traditional ideologies that the main purpose of sex is to reproduce in marriages. Established couples might also see less intimacy in their relationships in order to decrease the risk of an accidental pregnancy, which as a result could negatively effect relationship dynamics. In particular, couples in lower SES would feel these impacts harder, as they likely have a more difficult time accessing reliable forms of birth control. They also are less likely to be able to travel across state borders to access abortions in more progressive states if they really need to.

Rosy Almanzar

2023-11-26 04:25:46 UTC

A historical event that has had a profound impact on romantic relationships is The Great Recession of 2008. According to the National Library of Medicine increased IPV as they found a positive correlation between unemployment/economic hardship and abusive behavior. Increases in unemployment increased men’s controlling behavior towards their romantic partners. Overall, studies show that recessions strain couples relationships as men become more prone to becoming less affectionate and more hostile to their spouses. While women are more likely to become more demanding and less supportive.

Joan Song

2023-11-27 00:22:17 UTC

Although not specifically defined, I believe the era when media became popular to the public had a profound impact on how people view love, both inside and outside of the United States - the era where people started having access to televisions, radios, and news, which is still developing day-to-day. People can easily recall the famous scenes in movies, such as when Jack Dawson holding Rose Bukater on the edge of the cruise in Titanic, or when Seb and Mia dance gracefully in La La Land. The power that media holds is big, and the images of love it portrays have a great influence on how people think love “should” be, especially for those like young adults who have little experience. Media often conceal other “negative” aspects of romantic relationships where the partners argue, put in effort, or compromise, possibly giving them false fantasies about how their romantic relationships should turn out. Without public media, I think people would have been much more accepting of their unique relationships without having much bias or expectations. Starting from classic movies, it has become worldwide including K-drama, anime, wattpad, etc. It is not necessarily a bad thing, but the portrayal of love and romantic relationships through media shaped how people view and expect them to be nowadays.

Leilani Mate

lmate4 — 2023-11-27 07:49:48 UTC

A historical event we haven’t talked much about that has had a profound impact on romantic relationships is the legalization of same-sex marriage in 2015. In the Obergefell v. Hodges Supreme Court case, the court ruled that the due process clause of the Fourteenth Amendment guarantees same-sex couples the right to marry. This allowed LGBTQ+ couples to have legal recognition nationwide, granting them the marriage benefits of heterosexual couples. This case was a landmark event and a turning point for LGBTQ+ couples in culture and society. In the years since Obergefell v. Hodges, there has been a greater sense of inclusivity and acceptance when it comes to non-heterosexual identities and sexual orientations. The case was a step towards equality and against discrimination. Because of the legalization of same-sex marriage, it became more socially acceptable to be homosexual and therefore has made it easier for some members of the LGBTQ+ community to find romantic partners. There has also been an increase in the number of LGBTQ+ couples represented in the media. However, Obergefell v. Hodges did not solve the deep-rooted issue of homophobia in the United States. An example of the issue still being prevalent is the Pulse nightclub shooting in 2016, which was the deadliest act of violence against the LGBTQ+ community and caused immense fear, anger, and grief. To this day, LGBTQ+ couples face threatening legislation and rhetoric that has a profound effect on their relationships.

Victoria Ortiz

vickieortiz2004 — 2023-11-27 16:05:30 UTC

An event that has had a huge impact on relationships is the feminist movement that began in the mid 1800’s and in my opinion, made the largest impact on relationships beginning in the second wave of feminism during the 1970’s. As women have gained independence and their value in society, a move towards equal relationships in which both partners share tasks, roles, and decision-making has emerged. “Traditional” relationships in a heterosexual context involved the male counterpart being the dominant breadwinner and the woman being a submissive caretaker. The feminist movement’s strides towards equal pay, reproductive freedom, and equal rights were most prominent in the 1970’s and women began changing their perspectives on their role within heterosexual relationships. Roe v. Wade was decided in 1973 and was a huge win for women in this time, further pushing them to continue fighting towards equality. Since women were seeking equal treatment from the country, their employers, and the government, they were also seeking equal treatment within their own homes and relationships. While there are still many “traditional” relationships standing today, especially outside of the US, many relationships have become more egalitarian and less dependent on male dominant energy.

Chloe Christner

cchristn — 2023-11-27 18:25:47 UTC

One event that affected relationships is the great recession of the 2000s. Money is one of the biggest sources of arguments between couples. When the recession happened, people lost their jobs and money became a big struggle for most families. As a result of this, relationships may have been tested. If the provided in the relationship lost their job, it will cause problems in the relationship. The stress of worrying about money can be taken out in relationship. The economy undoubtedly impacts a relationship. From the stress and emotional strain associated with money problems to the decisions couples must make about allocating resources. A lot of relationships were probably tested during this time. The stress of the recession may have put a wedge between couples and led to them breaking up. Couples had to learn to work together to get through this hard time. After this event, a lot of relationships changed. Maybe the woman in the relationship went to work after her husband lost his job. Maybe the couple had to move because they couldnt afford where they were living. Maybe couples put off having children since until the economy goes back up and they have more money. Overall, the recession had a large impact on relationships and still does to this day.

Mei Higashi

mjhigash — 2023-11-27 18:54:25 UTC

One very recent historical event that had significant impact on romantic relationships was the COVID-19 pandemic. Aside from the obvious difficulties and stressors that a threat to health would create, the pandemic created a new dating environment/style and placed strain on pre-existing relationships.

For starters, the pandemic caused couples to migrate to online communication. During this time, online dating platforms and services increased popularity - making it a more prevalent method. It was already prominent, but the pandemic fueled it as a social norm more strongly.

Secondly, COVID-19 created obstacles for individuals in relationships already. The difficulty of traveling to one another, if a couple was not already living together, created strain and may have damaged some of the physical and emotional aspects of closeness. In contrast, people who were placed in a particular location or housing situation may have increased closeness - calling back to the "COVID-19 love stories" when people were stranded at a vacation spot and bonded during the time they were permitted from traveling outside of their location. These travel restrictions created either a decrease in, or lack thereof, physical contact; which may be an important factor of intimacy between partners.

Overall, communication styles, skills and frequencies were affected greatly by the pandemic - and the dating habits of all generations may be influenced forever.

Aadya Nijhawan

2023-11-27 20:55:51 UTC

World War II had many profound impacts that significantly affected the dynamic of romantic relationships:

Separation: A large number of couples were separated due to military service, creating problems and challenges in the maintenance of relationships. A critical means of communication proved to be letter, which influenced the depth and intimacy of connections.
Accelerated Courtship: The wartime urgency resulted in accelerated courtship and marriages. Couples were uncertain about what the future held and hence made quick decisions related to marriages and commitment.
Changing Gender Roles: With men away at war, women were involved in new and changing roles in the workforce and society. This significant shift in gender roles influenced perceptions of women's capabilities and independence, creating a major impact on the dynamic of post war.
Post-War Adjustments: After the war, returning veterans faced the challenge of readjusting to normal civilian life. Reintegration into family life and relationships often required significant adaptation. This adaptation and relearning civilian life has a profound effect on their romantic relationships.
Impact on Intimacy: The stress and trauma of war that the returning veterans faced influenced the emotional dynamics of relationships. Some couples found renewed appreciation for life and love, while the other unfortunate ones faced the challenges of post-traumatic stress and readjustment.

Fadi Kabi

2023-11-27 21:52:24 UTC

One historical event which had an impact on romantic relationships is the Cold War. The example of the Cold War is a bit different than others because it's issues were mainly confined to the time period of the cold war, and you may only observe remnants of it in today's society. The intense paranoia and suspicion during the Cold War era often extended to personal relationships. Individuals were sometimes wary of their partners, friends, or colleagues being spies, especially if they had connections to the opposing political ideology. The threat of nuclear war during the Cold War era had a psychological impact on individuals and families. The fear of a potential global conflict and the arms race influenced decisions regarding family planning, with some couples questioning the wisdom of bringing children into a world with such uncertainties. Military service and the fear of deployment impacted romantic relationships as partners faced the challenges of separation, uncertainty, and the potential of war.

Jada Griffiths

jadagrif — 2023-11-28 01:28:37 UTC

A historical event that definitely impacted relationships would be the great depression. The Great Depression began in August 1929, when the economic expansion of the Roaring Twenties came to an end. It was a series of financial crises that impacted many families and people nationwide. Research has shown that the great depression lowered marriage rates and made many people. This can be explained by the economic turmoil caused by the Depression that led to widespread unemployment and financial hardship for many people. Thus many individuals delayed marriage or chose not to marry due to the uncertainty of being able to provide for a family. This financial strain caused so much uncertainty for many people. Dates cost money 90% of the time so this caused a decrease in people's ability to go on dates and in turn the rates of people dating also went down. Societal norms were also affected and dating standards were impacted as well. In turn the age of people getting married also went up in time. People were getting married much later in life. Many people’s lifestyles changed as priorities went from choosing to get married to focusing on yourself and your own money. Overall the widespread economic downfall and uncertainty of the Great Depression reshaped societal values and preferences, resulting in a decrease in marriage rates as individuals emphasized securing financial stability and surviving instead of conforming to old societal norms of starting families.

Yasmeena Sharif

2023-11-28 02:08:04 UTC

A historical event we haven't touched on as much that has had a large impact on relationships is the strike of women in South Korea, who are deciding not to get married or have children. This comes after years of oppression of women in South Korea -- who have to work longer hours in the domestic sphere than their husbands, and are often encouraged to quit their jobs in lieu of child-rearing. While this strike is having an effect on how many children are being born in South Korea, I think that the strike is indicative of a larger sentiment shared by women around the world in the current era. All around the world, prices are increasing, and it is getting more and more expensive to have children and raise a family. Groceries are expensive, gas prices are high, and women are still economically disadvantaged in most places in the world. Women are faced with vast pay gaps as opposed to men, especially when that is compounded with the pay gaps they may face due to their race. I think that the strike South Korean women are currently on is indicative of a larger world-wide sentiment, that is acknowledging how many societies are not set up to accommodate and support women.

Sage Shimabukuro

2023-11-28 06:01:08 UTC

I think one historical event that dramatically shifted peoples views on love and relationships was the 1980s-1990s AIDS crisis. Couples faced the task of discussing sexual health, safety measures, and the significance of mutual responsibility for one another's well-being. This wasn't just about emotional support but also about physical care and protection, which became integral components of expressing love and commitment. This crisis reshaped the concept of trust within relationships. The need for open communication and honesty about sexual history and health status became more and more important. This transparency cultivated stronger, more resilient bonds based on mutual respect and understanding. Relationships became more inclusive of discussions about sexual health, emphasizing shared responsibility and mutual care. In addition to this, there was a stigma surrounding AIDS that particularly discriminated against gay men. Partners were forced to confront the harsh realities of discrimination and societal judgment, leading to more profound displays of empathy and solidarity. This led to more activism and the continued the fight for gay rights.

Michael Blasi

mblasi5 — 2023-11-28 06:39:26 UTC

A historical event we haven’t talked about that has had a significant impact on our views of romantic relationships was when the Supreme Court struck down all bans on same-sex marriage, formally recognizing same-sex couples. This event proved to be significant, as it gave members of the LGBTQ+ identity a hand that had not previously been lent. Additionally, it arguably changed how homosexuality was seen in the public eye, as perhaps before the passing of this law, it had been seen as “taboo” or “unright” by some. However, after the passing of this law, homosexuality seemed to be more and more normalized; henceforth, today it is widely accepted by the public eye. The event was extremely impactful for more than just one reason as well, as with the legalization of same-sex marriage, people of the LGBTQ+ identity saw more representation in the media allowing them to once more connect with entertainment or culture that had previously been deemed too upright for public viewing. Yet, despite this major win for those of the LGBTQ+ community, it still must be noted that members of this community are not safe from attacks or hate crimes, as within even the past year, the FBI recognized 1051 victims of hate crimes due to their sexual orientation. As a result, this has led to a vast amount of outrage and protest. Therefore, because of its widespread impact on society, I believe that this event is equally as important as the ones we discussed in class.

Falcon

keyufu — 2023-11-28 06:48:16 UTC

I think one event that has profound impact on romantic relationship is the Obergefell v. Hodges. The supreme court struck down all state bans on same-sex marriage, and that definitely had a huge impact on romantic relationship. We've spent a lot of time talking about gender equality and the changes of romantic relationship, but this topic is definitely a huge step in our history. People, regardless of their self-identity have the rights to pursuit the happiness they desire. This is a huge step in our history, and I believe it is very difficult to achieve without the former efforts. Throughout the time, parents or family seniors have less influence on the decision-making of young couples, and earlier access to jobs give young couples more flexibilities when choosing their future path. Furthermore, people begin to value both side of a romantic relationship, and more protections are given to family, especially children. These are all vital efforts that make the society believes that more freedom and more openness are okay and beneficial to happiness

Parker Taylor

parkerta3 — 2023-11-28 07:54:05 UTC

One historical event that has specific ties to the country which I am from is the completion of the Canadian Pacific Railway in 1885. The completion of this interprovincial railway allowed for the facilitation of movement of people across the country. This, in turn, greatly influenced not only settlement patterns and the demographics of various regions, but also the dynamics of romantic relationships at the time as communities were established, grown, and diversified. Upon the completion of the railway, individuals were able to migrate and settle in different regions much more conveniently, which likely fostered the creation of new communities and the mixing of diverse populations. Changes in settlement patterns such as the ones catalyzed by this railway’s establishment, for example, influenced the availability and diversity of potential romantic partners. Economic opportunities in these increasingly accessible regions could also have influenced peoples’ decisions regarding marriage and family formation as well, both of which exemplify the social dynamics of relationships in the country as a whole. In a similar manner, the railway's completion also facilitated social mobility, which in turn affected the partner search, as relocation between urban and rural areas became increasingly convenient. Perhaps most profoundly, though, the increased movement of people brought upon by the railway likely led to an unprecedented amount of cultural exchange and the sharing of traditions and practices. This likely resulted in more intercultural partnerships as well as a mixing and shifting of societal norms as multiple communities’ perceptions intermingled, including norms and conventions related to courtship, marriage, and romantic relationships.

Maya Lewis

2023-11-28 23:12:41 UTC

I think the #MeToo Movement has had a significant impact on romantic relationships. Conversations about boundaries have become more explicit, creating an environment where partners feel empowered to communicate their desires and set limits. #MeToo has also looked at an examination of power imbalances within relationships. It has challenged the notion that certain behaviors are acceptable due to existing power differentials. We could talk about how women have been more likely to come out about assault, for example, the women who came out against Harvey Weinstein.

Maya Lewis

2023-11-28 23:26:05 UTC

I think one of the main points, teaching healthy skills has it's strengths and weaknesses. This approach serves as a form of early intervention, preventing the normalization of harmful behaviors that may lead to IPV. The focus on healthy skills can help in building a culture of respect within relationships and understanding boundaries. However, it's important to understand that teaching healthy skills cannot solve IPV immediately it requires ongoing advocacy,and other support systems. Incorporating relationship education into society ensures a continuous dialogue about healthy relationships, fostering a culture where seeking help is encouraged and stigmatization is minimized. Societal factors, such as victim-blaming and the stigma associated with leaving a partner, can contribute to a sense of isolation and discourage individuals from seeking help. I feel like this also attributes why learning healthy relationship skills would be necessary, but more needs to be done especially to help people who are already affected by IPV.