A promise,

Knows things that,

Nobody else knows,

Hurts you,

First Love Pain;

Feels like Hell,

I can't breathe,

I can't see clear,

I sob and cry,

My heart aches,

First Love Pain;

You think it's,

Your fault,

So you blame,

Yourself,

Hurt yourself,

First Love Pain;

When your heart,

Hurts like a Bitch,

Because he cheats,

That is not your,

Fault but is,

First Love Pain

Heart tattered,

Battered,

Beaten,

Broken,

It won't let go;

I scream,

I shout,

I call out for help,

Yet, no one hears me,

I fear the worst is,

Dying like this,

Throwing in the towel,

Giving into Depression.

Now fear is at my door,

It won't leave,

It harasses me,

Someone help me please!

My love please send help!

I am just helpless against them,

They beat me,

They break me,

They choke me,

They harm me,

Love please get help!

I can't escape them,

Depression and Fear are haunting,

me~(3)

Leave,

Freeze,

Never wake up,

Never Breathe;

If I could I would-

Leave this,

School,

Family,

World;

To be reunited with her;

She helped keep me safe,

When your storms broke out,

When you set Him free,

Let Him hurt me;

You let me fall off the tight rope-

Never saved me,

Always hurt me;

You left when I needed you most,

I need you now;

Only he knows how I feel,

We don't have to meet,

To know each other,

We speak threw his music.

"Sorry",

But then you,

Do it again,

You set your,

Inner Devil free;

You say you're-

"Gonna stop",

But then you,

Do it again,

You hurt us,

Again,

Just like last time;

Shoulda' known-

It was a,

Lie just like,

Everything else,

You say;

You say you're-

"Gonna try harder",

But then you,

Don't try,

At all;

I'm Trapped,

I'm locked in,

My mind,

I can't escape this,

This Emotion Reckage,

This downward spiral,

Back to Deppression-

Back to Fear-

The only way out,

The only escape rout,

To End It!

To pick up that knife,

Take the knife straight through,

The chest,

Straight to the heart,

End It!

Maybe then I'd-

Feel no more,

Pain,

Hoplessness,

Helplessness,

Sorrow,

Self-doubt,

No more fear,

If I just,

End it!

I'm in a hole and can't get out,

I'm trapped,

Like a hamster in a wheel,

Like a dog in a cage,

I'm being buried alive,

In this Pain,

This Sorrow,

This Misery,

This Torture,

This Doubt,

This Guilt,

This eternal Hell!

My mind is overwhelming me,

Depression gets the best,

Of me,

Fear gets the rest,

Of me,

All of these Feelings,

They swirl inside me,

They tell me I'm nothing,

They belittle me,

They break me,

They harass me;

They won't leave me alone,

They won't leave me in peace,

They taunt me,

They torture me,

They tell me lies,

And I can't escape;

These Feelings and Voices,

They are my personal prison,

They are my Alcatraz;

I'm lost,

In my mind,

I can't get out,

Like my life is a,

Broken record;

Keeps spinning but,

Never getting anywhere,

The song it sings,

"Depression, Fear,

Depression, Fear"

Repeat;

My mind is a,

Song on,

Loop,

Repeat,

Never ending,

What it starts;

My soul just,

Goes along with,

What ever my mind,

Is in tune with,

Save my soul,

The rest will,

Be "Okay";

Save my soul,

The rest will,

Be "Okay";

Save my soul,

The rest will,

Be "Okay";

My life when you,

Were hopeless,

In Pain,

Misery,

Emotional Displeasure,

And wanting to die;

I saw you as,

Someone with potential,

Someone who needed,

Help,

Love,

A friend;

I befriended you,

And my feelings,

They grew,

That Friday,

I found a,

New friend;

Some Russian,

Who I related to.

We helped each other,

We became,

Homies,

We formed,

What they call a,

"Turama bond";

We clicked,

We hold each other up,

We keep each other,

Safe,

We are there,

For each other,

We have an,

Unbreakable bond;

That Friday,

I met my true,

Forever Friend;

Koi my,

Russian friend,

Deca-lingual,

Smart,

Muy inteligente,

My forever friend;

Life would be easier,

With you gone,

You're nothing,

Total garbage,

Trash",

"Shut the Hell Up";

These Inner Voices,

They won't leave,

They taunt me,

They haunt me;

I can't escape,

I believe what they say,

I just can't find the,

Courage to complete the task;

"One swipe is all,

It takes,

One trigger,

To pull,

One leap,

No harnas",

That's what these,

Inner Voices say;

Nine days left,

Easter was,

Right around the,

Corner when you,

Said "Hello" to,

The world;

Your Big Sister,

She named you:

Layken Crew Williams,

You were born,

Nine days left,

Big Sister won,

Her game and,

Went to watch,

Her,

Easter Baby,

Be born with,

Nine days left;

At one day old,

Big Sister held you,

She loved you,

With,

All her heart

It suffocates me,

It drowns me,

It strangles me,

The only way,

To save myself is,

If I hurt myself,

The alcohol is a,

Great friend,

The drugs a,

Trusted homie;

Pop pills,

Smoke Joints,

Drink liquor,

Break scisors,

Slit my wrists,

That was,

My 6th grade life;

Battle with Depression-

Thoughts say,

I'm worthless,

Unwanted;

This world,

This life,

It's an,

Evil place;

Scary,

Thoughts drifting,

Not enough;

Dead serious,

I'm terrafied,

Going insane,

Can't breathe;

Kill me please,

I can't do,

siesse,

I'm terrible;

Life has,

Lost meaning,

Don't know,

Who I love;

You or Him,

He ghosts me,

You talk,

To me;

High on,

Weed,

Hitting vapes to,

Numb me;

I'm high,

I'm drunk,

I'm still,

In Pain;

Thoughts voice it,

Can't help but,

Revel in it;

Challenged,

Discouraged,

Can't find happiness,

Till now;

Two of you,

I love both,

But can't have,

Both of you;

Confused,

Hurt,

Wanna end it,

All;

Send drugs,

Send booze,

Send help,

Set me free;