Jan 7 2021 Belongingness Response (white affinity space) by Katherine O'Hare Gibson https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt Made with ♥ en-us 2021-01-05 15:45:44 UTC 2021-05-20 19:13:38 UTC hello@padlet.com I found myself thinking about what it feels like to field such offensive questions and comments over the course of an entire lifetime. koharegibson1 https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1060051274 2021-01-06 16:37:14 UTC https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1060051274 How to recognize the urgency in this work but also respect that everyone is in different spots of their learning koharegibson1 https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1060052202 2021-01-06 16:37:25 UTC https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1060052202 Silence https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1065573710 When there is silence/lack of participation during these breakout sessions. When only 2 or 3 voices are doing most of the speaking. What does this mean? How do we unpack this? Maybe more choices for learning/engaging will lead to increased talk/discussion? Or maybe listening and reflecting silently is okay too? ]]> 2021-01-08 00:14:23 UTC https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1065573710 The interviewer clearly felt her question was so important that she kept reiterating it even after Ms. Morrison's clear and candid response. TM's eloquence was such a powerful reminder that she had been confronted by this type of interaction over and over again. llipsitz https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1065690647 2021-01-08 01:10:17 UTC https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1065690647 I agree with the preceding comment; it is hard to know why some people are able to discuss this readily while others seem to remain quiet. I wonder if we create smaller groups: would more people jump in? llipsitz https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1065696883 2021-01-08 01:13:19 UTC https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1065696883 I think we need to develop shared language that people can use to launch a "time out" when someone is hurting another. Additionally we need the words to communicate our desire to hear when we have harmed others so that we can learn how to shift our words and actions. llipsitz https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1065705453 2021-01-08 01:17:12 UTC https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1065705453 I'm not sure how to plan for this, but I'd like to know when actions/ ssoiref https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1065823771 2021-01-08 02:17:16 UTC https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1065823771 https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1255485120 She made such great points and I think it's so important to consider this (as a white person) when I go about my everyday choices, interactions and relationships and how this affects the narratives of my relationships with both my BIPOC and white coworkers, friends and family. ]]> 2021-03-01 20:55:31 UTC https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1255485120 https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1255486743 It makes me sad to think of how fatiguing it must feel to be prompted to explain yourself constantly and for others to have expectations of you to explain]]> 2021-03-01 20:55:57 UTC https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1255486743 What are your connections and reactions to the Toni Morrison interview? https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1255488407 Ms. Morrison's ability to stay calm, and present her concerns regarding the question asked was extraordinary. She refrained from being defensive and instead stated the facts/her reality]]> 2021-03-01 20:56:21 UTC https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1255488407 https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1255488986 There was so much said that I think it would be helpful to have the text of the conversation or to watch it again. It's a lot to process.

For example, there was one part about where TM says something about how most narrators it feels as though they are not speaking to her? I'm not quite sure I understood it well but I would like to. 

]]> 2021-03-01 20:56:30 UTC https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1255488986 She was being portrayed as angry for no reason despite having every right to be angry. Her response was so well said and its astonishing how people can still say you're overreacting. jpatr823 https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1255491748 2021-03-01 20:57:19 UTC https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1255491748 There was a lot of focus on the intent of the original question, but Charlie Rose didn't hear that Toni Morrison was sharing the impact the question had on her. https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1255494604 2021-03-01 20:58:06 UTC https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1255494604 She thoughtfully responded to Charlie Rose, clearly having considered this response. Tat tells me that she has been confronted this frequently and developed a response. That in itself is distressing to me. https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1255495951 2021-03-01 20:58:28 UTC https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1255495951 I admire how Toni Morrison was able to challenge Charlie Rose to think about the purpose of the question and the true meaning and logic behind the question. She supported her thinking behind the meaning and purpose with several powerful examples. By holding her ground, she imparted the importance of considering language and impact in our interactions with others. I believe she was able to do in a way that feels strong and conversational- no matter how Charlie Rose responded. https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1255496400 2021-03-01 20:58:34 UTC https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1255496400 Struggling with https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1255496465 being comfortable with silence in groups...and instead appreciate that "thinking" and "learning" are still taking place.]]> 2021-03-01 20:58:36 UTC https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1255496465 I'm thinking about how she found writers that weren't white centered and what that meant to her. I'm thinking about this idea of how things are explained to white people because of the white centered culture. What is explained and what is taken for granted in the texts and conversations that I encounter? https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1255496851 2021-03-01 20:58:42 UTC https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1255496851 https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1255496913 I felt so sad that the interviewer had no idea because that is white privilege ]]> 2021-03-01 20:58:43 UTC https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1255496913 It https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1255500022 2021-03-01 20:59:38 UTC https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1255500022 https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1255500754 I]]> 2021-03-01 20:59:50 UTC https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1255500754 She https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1255504932 2021-03-01 21:01:02 UTC https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1255504932 Larger Groups https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1255505016 As was mentioned earlier, discussing in smaller groups feels less intimidating to me.  The silence is also uncomfortable and hard.  It's hard to to make assumptions/judgements when there's silence.

]]> 2021-03-01 21:01:04 UTC https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1255505016 https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1255505111 2021-03-01 21:01:05 UTC https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1255505111 Strive to change perspective https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1545153766 knowing the phrase and understanding that "history is written by the victors" has always motivated me to look into situations and events deeper and how my situation has influenced it and try to see and learn other perspectives to try to "strip" myself of my socially attributed privileges of being white and male and how it is for others that don't have those social privileges to better sympathize or understand how it is not even or fair for many people and to not take advantage of this or normalize/be content with the socially attributed privileges of being white or male]]> 2021-05-20 18:30:43 UTC https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1545153766 Yes! https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1545154704 When I think back on conversations I have had with family members, or friends, I can see how my thinking and language was very much in line with the patterns of ignoring racial issues and focusing on a narrow understanding of racism as individual acts/beliefs rather than as a system that whites advantage from whether we see it or not. ]]> 2021-05-20 18:30:57 UTC https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1545154704 https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1545154972 Many of the ideas that Layla spoke of resonated with me.  One idea that she mentioned that I totally agree with is the hypocrisy of white people.  I don't remember her specific words, but it was along the lines of whites expressing their feelings of how they feel like they're being disenfranchised when in reality they are disenfranchising others. I really enjoy learning about history so the discussion of how whiteness has evolved and changed in the United States has changed.  This made me start to research how my ancestors were considered not-white; instead they were considered brutish and subhuman.  ]]> 2021-05-20 18:31:01 UTC https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1545154972 Yes. Growing up in the 70's there were a lot of racial divides and accepted terms and labels that are quite offensive. https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1545167055 2021-05-20 18:33:55 UTC https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1545167055 "Whites often don't know what being white means." https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1545170600 I've heard friends and family members say things like, "I'm just a regular person."  We see our race, or people who look like us, at the center of "regular" or "normal".  

]]> 2021-05-20 18:34:48 UTC https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1545170600 Segregation https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1545173337 The chapter on affinity groups was really interesting. I think most people acknowledge and understand the need for BIPOC people to have a space where they can talk.  At the same time, I've listened to people criticize these spaces using lots of the reasons stated in the article - aren't we all people? are we being discussed? 
I think part of it is the label of "white" that some people are uncomfortable with. They may unconsciously feel singled out or labeled.
I agree with the final sentiment in that section that many white people live their lives in a segregated world - the town they live in, the people they spend time with, etc yet when it's specifically named, it makes them defensive.]]> 2021-05-20 18:35:30 UTC https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1545173337 https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1545179306 I liked how she discussed when white people are labeled racist, they have a big reaction and then flip it on the other person as being "too sensitive" or they took it the wrong way and try to justify it. white people have always gotten away with being racist and when most have that reaction I believe it is because they fear some type of consequence. Even if there is a consequence of being labeled a racist it is very minimal and in no comparison to the experience of BIPOC. ]]> 2021-05-20 18:37:06 UTC https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1545179306 Whiteness is ideology, not skin color koharegibson1 https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1545180687 As someone who identifies as white, my early learnings about whiteness caused a lot of guilt, shame, denial. Thinking of whiteness as an ideology, one which has been offered or "taught" to me but one I can reject, has been really helpful. I really like Layla Saad's strategy, to protect from the negative feelings of doing this work (for her, anger, hurt, etc), is she tries to put herself in the shoes of the "other" (in her case, a white person who has little/no understanding of 'whiteness'). When white people feel negative feelings (for me, guilt, shame, etc) I can do the same, and try to put myself in the shoes of an "other".]]> 2021-05-20 18:37:29 UTC https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1545180687 It is our job to educate ourselves. We can't expect to be "spoon fed" information. We need to take ownership for our lack of understanding and our missteps. We need to push forward and recognize white privilege and avoid micro aggressions. https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1545181080 2021-05-20 18:37:35 UTC https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1545181080 https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1545183979 I see a lot of defensive behaviors when we think about the "guilt" aspect of how white people feel hearing these things. The article mentions how you can either use that guilt for good, to educate yourself and make change. Or you end up using that guilt for anger and silence. I think it is important that all white people feel a sense of guilt and take responsibility for what is our society.]]> 2021-05-20 18:38:19 UTC https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1545183979 It is clear from both the article and the video that the work is ongoing and experiential as well as something we can learn from reading or researching, and that it is worth it to face and embrace the challenge. https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1545185337 2021-05-20 18:38:38 UTC https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1545185337 https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1545189757 I used to think that being a good person and contributing to racism (and white supremacy) were mutually exclusive. I now see that it is possible to be kind to individuals and still uphold racist policies and institutions (knowingly or unknowingly).]]> 2021-05-20 18:39:48 UTC https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1545189757 Carefulness https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1545194088 After reading this article, I finally had a name for what I've felt when talking to people from different backgrounds and races. I can recall many times when I was absolutely trying to be "careful" so as not to offend others, but now I see how that could come across as insincere and uptight and reserved. It's better to have the authentic and genuine conversations, and if mistakes are made along the way (and they will be) to own it and address it when that happens. This leads to more productive work.]]> 2021-05-20 18:41:00 UTC https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1545194088 https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1545200024 I think I have objectified people of color. The really has made me think about how I should be interacting differently with some people. I also have been inclined to want to get a black person's perspective to help me on my journey. I realize now that it is more important that I do that work myself. It is no one else's job to teach me but mine.]]> 2021-05-20 18:42:35 UTC https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1545200024 https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1545215208 I also had a strong reaction when I read about the antiracist workshop facilitated by white and black leaders. When it was time for the POC perspective the white person spoke throughout-even though they were instructed to just listen. That really showed me the white power felt by that woman and I was surprised at how unaware she was about what she was doing.]]> 2021-05-20 18:46:35 UTC https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1545215208 https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1545221091 Oftentimes when I am speaking to people from a different culture, I try to "prove" that I am aware of their culture by saying things that I know about or have experienced from this culture. I do this as a way to feel connected to and learn about other cultures, but I am now questioning if this is being interpreted in another way that could be demeaning to the people I have spoken with.]]> 2021-05-20 18:48:13 UTC https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1545221091 https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1545294816 that was a very powerful video. It really makes me sad that people of color have to strip parts of themselves to be accepted. BIPOC hair has been policed and then considered trendy when done by white people. ]]> 2021-05-20 19:07:51 UTC https://padlet.com/koharegibson1/vzr173wkoze8qgbt/wish/1545294816