Perfectly Imperfect by Teck Wei Toh

•With reference to these questions, what self-compassionate statement(s) can Zach use to replace his critical voice(s)?

teckweitoh1_1 — 2024-04-08 03:20:29 UTC

Write a self-compassionate statement to yourself.

teckweitoh1_1 — 2024-04-08 03:43:57 UTC

stephanieeio09 — 2024-04-08 04:47:27 UTC

A person would have copious amounts of stress which would in turn affect their mood long term (e.g. they could feel depressed, lethargic all the time or lose interest in what they are doing) and this may result in further procrastination. They might also expect such high expectations from others, creating unnecessary anxiety and conflict.

kaitlyn & yu han

yuhanyou09 — 2024-04-08 04:47:39 UTC

stressed

Zi Ting & Ai Ge

zitingang09 — 2024-04-08 04:47:46 UTC

You will stress yourself out and will be willing to do anything, good or bad, to achieve your goals.

megan and zi en

megan01tan09 — 2024-04-08 04:47:46 UTC

it will be bad for your mental health because it sets up you up for failure if you know you can't meet those expectations to begin with. D:

yucheng & isabelle

isabellechia09 — 2024-04-08 04:47:59 UTC

> when you cant exceed the expectations you set for yourself, you will feel discouraged and you will be depressed :(
> you will belittle yourself and have very negative emotions

Carina & Siqi

siqideng091 — 2024-04-08 04:48:08 UTC

- Stresses one out
- Lowers self esteem, thinks worse of oneself than in reality
- Worries others / pressurise others to set higher expectations for themselves as well

claire & kady

kadychan09 — 2024-04-08 04:48:33 UTC

- having unhealthy expectations can cause burnout, stress, negative feelings or emotions, mood swings
- high expectations can be unachievable/unrealistic, and it could cause a lot of disappointment if those expectations are not met
- mood swings could also affect others

zerongchen091 — 2024-04-08 04:48:36 UTC

It would bring a large amount stress and anxiety, as you have set impossible expectations for yourself, as well as others. If you require everyone else to be perfect, they will become irritable

Le Xuan, Changxin

changxinye09 — 2024-04-08 04:48:51 UTC

You’ll think you suck if you don’t reach those unrealistic goals which is dumb cuz that stresses you out and causes depression.

liwenyeo09 — 2024-04-08 04:48:52 UTC

It will either push them to great success or set them up for immense failure from the first day.
They experience burnout and become unmotivated for a goal that would have been otherwise achievable.

yixi and yingzhen

yingzhenru091 — 2024-04-08 04:48:56 UTC

Unhealthy expectations on others would cause them to be unable to cope with not being able to quickly achieve what they believe are required to reach, causing stress and letting them be not satisfied with progress, which could even cause them to regress.

Nina and Michelle

michellekhoo09 — 2024-04-08 04:49:00 UTC

If you set yourself an impossible goal, you are just setting yourself up for failure. You are guaranteeing that no matter what you do, you will always be disappointed in yourself.

fangyu & steph L

fangyudeng09 — 2024-04-08 04:49:58 UTC

Stresses both parties, and may end up taking too long on each task to achieve perfection. People with unhealthy expectations could end up having low-esteem as they don’t always live up to them

Sherie and Allison

sherietan091 — 2024-04-08 04:50:26 UTC

Having unhealthy expectations of yourself would result in overworking yourself to reach those unrealistic goals, and dejection when they are not met. They can also affect others’ expectations and make them feel that their expectations are not high enough.

Prudence & Rachel

prudencehall09 — 2024-04-08 04:50:27 UTC

It pushes you to be your best self. (as long as you still have boundaries)

claire & kady

kadychan09 — 2024-04-08 04:59:09 UTC

- criticises himself
- withdrew from interacting with people
- had difficulty falling asleep at night
it is important to recognise these signs as these feelings can escalate to mental illnesses such as depression.

megan and zi en

megan01tan09 — 2024-04-08 04:59:10 UTC

withdrawal from friends and life, self-criticism

to prevent having unhealthy obsessive expectations that lead to disappointment

isabelle & yucheng

isabellechia09 — 2024-04-08 05:00:13 UTC

- withdrawal from outside world
- difficulty falling asleep
- self worth decreasing
- negative thoughts about himself

Zerong and Yuxin

2024-04-08 05:00:27 UTC

- withdrawal from social interaction
- large amounts of self-deprecation

yixi and yingzhen

yingzhenru091 — 2024-04-08 05:00:35 UTC

2nd qn. it is important to recognise these signs to see if the person needs help or assistance and forms of support they might need before their situation deproves

kady + claire

kadychan09 — 2024-04-08 05:00:49 UTC

he could be comparing himself to famous influencers, so his expectations of popularity are skewed

Zi Ting and Ai Ge

aigeho09 — 2024-04-08 05:00:55 UTC

- Does not interact with others online or in real life
- Stayed up till very late to edit his photos

It is important to recognise these signs so that we can provide him with the support and help he needs in this time of crisis.

Siqi and Carina

2024-04-08 05:01:06 UTC

Spends more time uploading each post
Would criticise himself for being lousy and unpopular when posts are not received well
Posted less and less, would delete posts in fear that people would not like them
Withdrew from interacting with people
Felt lonely and unimportant
Difficulty falling asleep at night

It is important to recognise these signs as too much stress would cause negative emotions caused by unhealthy high expectations to overweigh positive ones and we should know when to take a step back and relieve stress.

megan and zi en

megan01tan09 — 2024-04-08 05:01:17 UTC

seeing other people who are more popular than him and comparing himself

expecting his like count to continuously increase

Michelle & Nina

ninali09 — 2024-04-08 05:01:17 UTC

- he had difficulties sleeping
- he withdrew from other people online and offline
- he thought he was useless and that nobody liked him

It is important to recognise these signs as he needs to get professional help quickly otherwise he will fall into depression and then even have suicidal thoughts.

Sherie and Allison

sherietan091 — 2024-04-08 05:01:17 UTC

- insomnia
- social withdrawal
- self criticism
It is important to recognise these signs as they are indications of struggles that people are facing, which can spiral and result in harsher consequences that can harm the person and the people around him

fangyu & steph L

fangyudeng09 — 2024-04-08 05:01:18 UTC

Signs of distress
- withdrawal from social relationships
- low self-esteem
- low self-confidence
- defining self-worth through Instagram
- addiction to social media

Importance
- identifying these signs are important in helping a distressed friend out

stephanieeio09 — 2024-04-08 05:01:29 UTC

He had low self-esteem, insomnia and withdrew from social interactions online and offline. It is important to recognise these signs as they indicate a decline in mental and physical health and shows that the person requires support during this time.

kaitlyn & yu han

yuhanyou09 — 2024-04-08 05:01:36 UTC

cannot sleep
isolation of oneself
self criticism
depression??
importance: we need to recognise when someone we know shows these signs as it might have consequences

yucheng isabelle

isabellechia09 — 2024-04-08 05:01:39 UTC

- compared himself to famous celebrities (warped expectations)
- based self worth on social media following
- set unrealistic expectations of himself

Zi Ting & Ai Ge

aigeho09 — 2024-04-08 05:02:07 UTC

- Peer pressure
- He does not have other talents
- He thinks he needs to be the best all the time

Liwen and claire

liwenyeo09 — 2024-04-08 05:02:16 UTC

Basing his self-worth on the number of likes and positive comments he’s getting (it’s a somewhat superficial and unreliable source of affirmation)

Withdrawal from online and offline communications

It is important because these signs are indicators of when you need to seek help and/or when you need to reach out to other people if they begin to display such signs of distress

Changxin and Le Xuan

2024-04-08 05:02:26 UTC

He is defining his self-worth according to how many likes he gets, which is very dumb because its not true.
He also can’t sleep, doesn’t talk to others, has lost his interest in things.
By doing so, you can take action faster by talking to others and sleeping more, and also take up other hobbies and interests so that your mental and physical health is not impacted too much

fangyu & steph L

fangyudeng09 — 2024-04-08 05:02:43 UTC

- Comparison of self with friends & celebrities
- Instagram likes reflect his popularity

Sherie and allison

sherietan091 — 2024-04-08 05:02:55 UTC

- the belief that his clout defines his self worth
- his own insecurities about his social standing
- comparing himself to social media influencers and celebrities who have professionals working with them to make posts
- the belief that he is unlikeable

stephanieeio09 — 2024-04-08 05:03:09 UTC

He associated his number of likes and followers directly to his popularity and self-worth, as well as setting unrealistic expectations of constantly increasing his ‘like’ count for each post. Additionally, he kept comparing himself to his friends as well as social media celebrities.

yixi and yingzhen

2024-04-08 05:03:10 UTC

- compare with his friend and celebrity
- unrealistic expectation
- believe that number of likes means popularity
- over reliant on opinions of other people
- believe that popularity determines who he is

Carina and Siqi

2024-04-08 05:03:42 UTC

comparison of himself and popular people with high quality posts
unrealistic expectations of viewer engagement, response from viewers
thinks that more followers, more likes equate directly with his popularity and self worth.
excessively seeks validation from social media

yu han & kaitlyn

yuhanyou09 — 2024-04-08 05:04:03 UTC

- likes on social media
- basing self worth on perception of others
- setting unrealistic expectations
- comparison to peers/ others

Michelle & Nina

ninali09 — 2024-04-08 05:04:04 UTC

He is comparing himself to people with more influence than him, like social media influencers and celebrities who have PR managers helping them, expecting himself to be better than them (unrealistic). He is comparing himself to his friends and expecting himself to be better than all of them (unrealistic). He believes the amount of likes and positive comments defines how likable he is in real life and is too overly dependent on social media.

fangyu & steph L

fangyudeng09 — 2024-04-08 05:04:13 UTC

- What are other things more important than being Instagram-popular?
- Does Instagram directly reflect my popularity?
- Does validation from others really matter to me and define my worth?

Liwen and cl e

liwenyeo09 — 2024-04-08 05:04:19 UTC

The belief that when there are few likes on his post, that means very few people like what he posted and so he must post nicer and more cool pictures
It’s not a baseless way to determine the degree of affirmation given by others but at the same time compared to offline interactions or even online conversations it cannot accurately reflect how much people like him .

megan and zi en

megan01tan09 — 2024-04-08 05:05:31 UTC

realistically speaking what bad things are going to happen to you if youre not popular?

do likes represent your relationship with people? if they don't like your post it doesn't mean you have no friends

he should know (2, 4, 11, 13, 14)
- likes don't determine his worth
- if he wants to have more friends, he has to talk to them instead of withdrawing and making more posts

Rachel and Prudence

prudencehall09 — 2024-04-08 05:05:43 UTC

withdrawal from social interactions
unhealthy obsession with likes and internet clout

you can help them before it gets worse, like depression

Nina and Michelle

michellekhoo09 — 2024-04-08 05:05:55 UTC

- Why are you letting strangers decide your worth?
- Why do you believe the comments (it could be anyone)?
- Why do you expect yourself to be better than others?

Zach’s self love:
You can do anything if you try hard enough:’D
You are the apple of your eye
You are perfect just the way you are :’DDDD

isabelle yucheng

isabellechia09 — 2024-04-08 05:09:27 UTC

Why do I care about strangers' opinions?
Does Instagram really matter?
Does Instagram make me happy?
Does Instagram help me achieve success in life?
What else makes me happy?

Carina and Siqi

siqideng091 — 2024-04-08 05:10:08 UTC

- does having enough likes on Instagram directly translate to self-worth?
- is the time spent on the posts proportionate to the positive outcomes?
- is one single negative feedback representative of the post?
- is it realistic to compare with celebrities who likely have professional teams managing their image?
- does poor feedback to the posts mean that people in real life dislike you?

Zi Ting & Ai Ge

zitingang09 — 2024-04-08 05:10:18 UTC

Why should I let the number of followers affect me?
Is it time for me to move on and get a new hobby?
Have I tried my best? If I tried my best, does it matter what the outcome is?

Changxin and Le Xuan

2024-04-08 05:10:21 UTC

He can ask himself what eh has to compare with the instagram stars since they have whole teams and professional equipment for their content
-> ask himself if he is being realistic or delulu
-> what is his worth? Is he really defined by his instagram? Is he really that lousy just because he doesn’t get enough likes??

Affirmations:
You are great! You’re so amazing!! <333
Don’t give up, even if you don’t succeed at least you learnt something out of it! :)

sherie and Allison

sherietan091 — 2024-04-08 05:10:26 UTC

- is what I want clout or validation?
- why do I want validation?
- how else can I define my self worth?

Zi Ting & Ai Ge

zitingang09 — 2024-04-08 05:11:26 UTC

Even if I did not do well this time, there will always be a second chance

kaitlyn & yu han

yuhanyou09 — 2024-04-08 05:11:40 UTC

- do likes really matter/ determine my self worth
- are my posts really that cool/ am i wasting my time
- do i have enough friends to like my posts
- is this going to matter in 10 years time

am worthy! of love from myself!! even if i don't have that many likes!!! i have tried my best!!!!

ck

kadychan09 — 2024-04-08 05:11:56 UTC

why are likes so important to you?
what else could you do to feel happy?

self compassionate statements:
1. I am worthy.
2. i am not limited to the number of my followers
3. it is not a failure, it is a chance to grow

ck

kadychan09 — 2024-04-08 05:12:39 UTC

i can do this!

stephanieeio09 — 2024-04-08 05:12:53 UTC

Does the number of likes you get on your posts really show whether you’re popular or not? (Considering the amount of time you spend editing, even if they like it, it’s not really them liking the real person).
Is it necessary to compare with others (because either way you have someone liking something you made, which is already pretty nice)?
“This is important to me, but I am fine with the outcome. I need to be kind to myself too.”

Prudence & Rachel

prudencehall09 — 2024-04-08 05:13:00 UTC

Why do strangers opinions matter?

Stephanie L

stephanieleng09 — 2024-04-08 05:13:00 UTC

It’s ok if you can’t do it first try, you can keep trying and never give up

Zerong and Yuxin

zerongchen091 — 2024-04-08 05:13:48 UTC

I deserve to live
I am great
I did well, to the best of my abilities

liw and cle

liwenyeo09 — 2024-04-08 05:14:51 UTC

There are so many other things you could base your self-worth on and congratulate yourself on (like cleaning your room, or all the hard work you put into the posts), why focus on the number of likes as a reflection of how much people like you and hence how much you like yourself?
Are you proud of your photo and the end result? If you are, then the likes shouldn’t matter.
Affirming statements:
I’m doing the best I CAN AND THATS AWESOME
I like this photo, and i should be proud of the editing ive done regardless of how many likes i get.
YAY!
i believe that i am more than i am perceived as. (Likes)

fangyu

fangyudeng09 — 2024-04-08 05:18:30 UTC

If you don’t start now, you will regret it later. Start brainstorming and writing down your ideas. Don’t waste your time!!

yuhanyou09 — 2024-04-08 05:18:56 UTC

im awesome

megan01tan09 — 2024-04-08 05:19:02 UTC

don't give up on whatever you're doing

Nothing in life is perfect, it’s okay to make mistakes and have flaws

2024-04-08 05:19:09 UTC

2024-04-08 05:19:18 UTC

It is alright to be distracted sometimes but always get back on track! You have crossed the start line and that means something.

zien

megan01tan09 — 2024-04-08 05:19:37 UTC

i am amazing i can do this yay!!!!!!!

sherietan091 — 2024-04-08 05:19:41 UTC

keep moving forward!

aigeho09 — 2024-04-08 05:19:44 UTC

you’re too good and wayyyyy better than everyone else

Have more motivation :DD

ninali09 — 2024-04-08 05:19:47 UTC

2024-04-08 05:20:34 UTC

im awesome brilliant wonderful incredible excellent marvellous 👽👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍

2024-04-08 05:20:38 UTC

yesterday is the same as today, today is the same as tomorrow. everything is the same, your expectations for today should remain as the ones for yesterday.

:D

isabellechia09 — 2024-04-08 05:20:54 UTC

at least you tried :)

changxinye09 — 2024-04-08 05:21:04 UTC

Try your best and leave no regrets. Don’t waste your life away then regret the way you spent it when you’re about to die

liwenyeo09 — 2024-04-08 05:21:21 UTC

i’m sorry you think everything needs to be on some wavelength of perfect. Everything was made with flaws and that is what makes perfect perfect.

michellekhoo09 — 2024-04-08 05:21:58 UTC

Just try, even if you feel like you can’t make it
:D

affirmation:

2024-04-08 05:22:10 UTC

i am normal and sane