One thing I did really well was crafting and explaining my thesis. 

One thing I need to work on my quotes and not explain the whole story.

My PLN can help me by pushing me to the next level in my writing.

Raymond's run mentor text:

I noticed a lot of small quotes and only explaining what needed to be said to support the claim in the essay.

The author made the move of using First, Second, and Last because it supported his thesis statement a lot better than one example, another example, and a final example.

I will emulate the author by only explaining and putting in the evidence that is needed to support my claim.

In the mentor text for Raymond’s Run, I noticed that they listed all of the evidence in order and sited it in order as the story goes along, I am going to try to somewhat model it. 

In the mentor text, I like how it's relating the story to the real world and how it gives a brief explanation of the main character as well as the theme and how it relates to the character. Using this information, I would like to implement these ideas into my lead.

While also looking I found that I need to do differently is my punctuation mainly with quotes.

Mrs.Reuter and/or my PLN can help me achieve my goals with punctuation is helping to remind me the punctuation goes after the quotation marks. 

While looking at the mentor text I found the author putting punctuation points behind quotation marks whereas I put them before.

Mentor Text

One thing I noticed they did in the mentor text is they didn’t just summarize the story but, they took quotes from the beginning, middle, and end then explained why they were significant. They also made sure there punctuation and spelling fit the requirements and had a very strong lead and ending.

 I liked how the author explained in the reflection of the mentor text. I also liked how the author had the same thesis statement into other words in his/her topic sentences.  

      Reading the mentor text I noticed how strong the topic sentences were and how short and sweet the body paragraphs were. I really liked the topic sentence in the second paragraph I liked the ¨As the story continues,¨ I thought that was a very strong way to introduce the second paragraph. I liked the way the author incorporated the dashes throughout the piece. I liked that the last sentence introduces the topic or main idea of the next paragraph and transitioning into that paragraph.

I did a very good job overall in my literary essay. The parts that I did the best in were, lead, craft, and ending. I did very well in those areas because I had a very strong thesis statement and had a counterpoint to my ending. Also, I showed that I worked really hard on those areas because I met with Mrs. Reuter and only changed a little bit of my ending and lead. Another thing I did well with was my spelling and elaboration. I did well in those areas because I used many resources to check if the word or quote made sense. 

What do I need to work on?

I need to work on my punctuation on the character literary essay. All of my mistakes were from poor punctuation. It reflected on the rubric because punctuation was the only grade that I got a three. Also, I need to work on my transitions on my character based literary essay. I got a grade of three and I want to go to the next level with my transitions and at least get a 3.5 on my next grade. 

From the mentor text, I noticed that the author used more types of punctuation I the essay. The author did that because it showed more advanced and grade level standards in the essay. Another thing I noticed was that the transitions were more unique. Also, the author didn’t use as many commas as I did in my essay. The final thing I noticed was that their way of writing the essay was more of a what happened in the beginning, what happened in the middle, and what happened in the end. Contrasted to mine which was one example, another example, and the final and most important example. 

How can Mrs. Reuter and/ or your PLN help you achieve your goals? 

Mrs. Reuter and my PLN can help me by checking in with me a few days before the due date. At that time I mostly check my work but have trouble with knowing the right punctuation. Also, if someone in my PLN knows a site where transitions are more advanced. The final thing that they can do is work with me on annotating more. The text I used for my story had very little annotating so I need someone just to remind me once in a while to stop and look at the text.  

Something that I noticed in the mentor text is that in the lead, it talks about how the real world can be scary and that when you build a wall around yourself your protecting yourself but also closing out the world. I also like how in the conclusion it compares Squeaky’s situation to real-world problems.

In the mentor text, It has analysis. In my writing, there is not that much analysis. In the mentor text, there is a description. That is something I could work. In the intro. (for teacher example) it explains more about Raymond’s Run. In my intro. I think could explain more about my story because I did not explain much about it.

Somethings that I really liked and realized in the example story was, it really had good transitions throughout the whole story. For example,  “ At this point in the text being protective feels like something that can actually hurt you.” The ones I like the most and learned from the most is the transitions at the end of the paragraph. The teacher's punctuation is very well after her quotes. The teacher also made sure to have the proper punctuation after a sentence. Finally, the teacher did really good at her craft. The teacher used very good word choice because she really found the words that the teacher could make stronger. Throughout the whole essay, I learned a lot from this teacher, especially how to make the craft of my story even better. 

When reading over the teacher writing exemplar, I noticed that I didn't make any connections to the real world but the exemplar did so I'm going to try to use that in my literary essay. I also noticed that they also listed all the reasons in the body paragraphs. And finally, I noticed that the author used evidence from the beginning and the middle and the end and stated how the character changed throughout the story.

Some things I did well in my Character- Based Literary Essay is that I had a strong lead with a thesis statement at the end of my introduction. Second, I have lots of evidence and analyzed it appropriately and didn’t summarize the whole story. Finally, I had great spelling in my essay. The things I need to work on is my punctuation, and by that I mean add page numbers, put colons and semicolons correctly. Another thing I need to work on is to re-read my essay and find little errors in my work. Lastly, I need my rubric next to me at all times so it can guide me in the correct direction. Mrs Reuter/PLN can help me achieve my goals by pushing me harder to get a 4 on my grades. Also, I would need another pair of eyes to check my work and see if I met the expectations. 

In the mentor text, I found out that all of the sentences make sense and the person definitely re-read their work to find their mistakes. The author kept referring to their thesis statement which made sure the readers remember what the significance of the essay was. I also noticed the author didn't add much detail about the story which would attract the readers to read the book. This example could be a guide to drive my paper in the correct direction.

 There are some things I would like to do differently. One thing I could do differently is transitions. Where I put my transitions it was a bit choppy, I would like to make it a bit smoother. I would also like to work on punctuation. The last thing I would like to do a bit differently is the craft of the essay. I chose words that fit with my paragraph and argument, but the words I picked to put in didn’t affect the reader as much as I’d like it too. 
 In the mentor text, I noticed that they had smooth transitions in the right spots and where they put the transitions it was nice and smooth.  Also when we were reading the mentor text I noticed that they had right use of comma placement and they knew where to end sentences and start ones and it was nice and smooth, they weren’t too many commas or periods. Finally, when reading the mentor text I noticed how they crafted their essay. They used strong words that affected their story and that affected the reader.

 Mrs. Reuter and my PLN can help me achieve these goals by re-reading my paper and tell me what is important and not as important and will not help me in my paper. Also where I should put punctuation and what I could add to make it better. The last thing they can do to help me is Tell me what words I should use to make my paper ten times better than what is it!    

                                              

From the mentor text in the lead in the story it was very explanatory and gave lots of information they also finished very strongly. I think they need to do different is give a little background about the story for people who haven’t read the story and work on explaining how she is protecting Raymond . I think Mrs. Reuter can help guide and show how you would explain a little more without telling the whole story.  

In the mentor text I noticed that in the ending the author used a really strong sentence to end the essay. I also noticed that in the lead the author gave examples of what she was talking about.

From the teacher writing exemplar I read, I could clearly see how each evidence connected to each other by the transitions that the writer used to transition from one piece of evidence to another for the readers to have a more clear understanding of the argument. 

On the other hand I could work on spelling and punctuation. I really need help with knowing where I should put all of my commas and my periods. I also need help with my spelling, as i said before, Mostly just knowing which their/there/they’re I think our spelling units help men with that. I also think that mrs. Reuter could help me with the punctuation part I also think it is important that I know these things before middle school.

When I was reading this I saw that the writer used her evidence where she just analyzed what her thinking behind all of it but she was just stating what was important not retelling the whole story. I could also tell she took lots of time with her punctuation because there was not run on sentences and there were comas in the right spots not just thrown in in was placed where it was needed.

In the mentor text Raymond’s Run I noticed a lot of things. I like how they didn’t retell the whole story and they didn’t have too many quotes that it was overwhelming. They had one or two quotes in each paragraph and they did lots of evidence and analysis.  One more thing I liked was the transitions the author used. Also, she used a lot of evidence and analysis to push her writing even more. 

When I look at the mentor text and read it I notice that there were no errors in grammar or punctuation. I also notice that the paragraphs are not really long but they still have lots of good things in them. I noticed that it kind of hooks the reader in on the first couple of sentences when it says, "The world is a scary place."

After looking at my mentor text I realized that the author has done stuff that I could do too like have juicy paragraphs, complex word for my reader be very suspicious about that certain word,  and also have also complicated character for the readers to know different sides like their character moral compass.

The author  of the mentor text did some things that I think I could do in  my theme based essay. I think I could add my trassisions In my essay. I think I could also use the language that the author used I think they used some very good words to describe raymond and squeaky. I think that I could fire my point home with my ending.  In the text I noticed that they kept repeating themselves to make sure that the reader could really see what the theme was and what they were trying to prove to us.  

 After reading the mentor text I noticed some things that I could put into my next literary essay.  I noticed that they did really well in their organization and that was one of my struggles so I could include organization like they did on my next literary essay.  Also I they had good transitions for going in and out of paragraphs, and I kind of also struggled with my transitions so I could add transitions like theirs for my next literary essay.  Also in the mentor text, I noticed they had really good, strong, and clear topic sentences so I could continue to add that to my next literary essay.  

Some of the things I did well on was my lead and my organization. I worked hard to make a lead that would bring in how Mrs. Jones was a generous character and not just a grumpy person like you may think. My organization was also one of the things I did well because I would sort my evidence and find the strongest piece, then place it at the end so my reader has that strongest evidence in mind when they finish reading my paragraph. 

I can achieve my goals by reading my sentences out loud to see if they make sense for punctuation and transitions. I can also read off the transition sheet we got to look for something that might help me.

As I looked through the mentor text, I noticed some things that I could use in my essay. Some of the things I noticed conclude of

◾Stating what happened and then giving the text evidence.

◾Noting how the things she is writing about changed.

◾She started her introduction with a life lesson, which brings the reader in.

◾She also ended her conclusion with a life lesson which brings wraps up the whole essay.

 While the mentor text and my PLN and Mrs. Reuter can help, I need to do my part, which is what makes this upcoming Literary essay, so special.

In the mentor text, I think I could add transitions and have a little more evidence along with making sentences make sense, along with working on the closing and the lead. Also in the mentor text, I liked how the theme kept on being repeated. I also like how the paragraphs were short and sweet and how they didn’t have too many quotes but also how they didn’t have too little quotes. I even like how the writer had tons and tons of evidence.

Some stuff I want to take away and use the mentor text is how good the analyzing my thinking and really use transitions that slide my thinking right on to the next piece of evidence. I really want to look and think more deeply about what I’m reading so I can have an excellent essay like the mentor text.

Reading the mentor text I noticed how I organized my paragraphs and how I lead my story. I need to keep trying to achieve my goals with the help of Mrs.Reuter to get the just-right Literary Essay. I realized that I have to work hard on adding in the right punctuation to get my story to make sense. I also need to keep working on my transitioning to get a nice understandable Essay. I will continue to work on fixing my mistakes and to keep working on getting even better. 

But what I have done well is things like Organization, Spelling, and Craft.

 But the overall grade for my literary essay was a 2.5. And what I will do better is Introduction, Transitions, Leads, Elaboration, Punctuation, and Ending.

I like how at the beginning of a paragraph or leading into a new idea, the author added great transitions. Such as, “As the story continues,” “In this moment,” and “In the middle of the story,” Something this author does that interested me that I could add to my piece of writing is analyzing without only relating to his/her thoughts, but looking at how it can teach all of us. Using this strategy throughout my whole piece will help me become a better writer.

My PLN teacher can help me achieve my goals by pushing me to analyze my thinking and by pushing me to talk about how Trisha was at the beginning and how Trisha is at the end of the story.

Now let's look at the mentor text I now that I could have done better but looking at the story Thank you Mr.Falker  

   When I read the mentor text, I liked how the author didn’t retell the story, the author told her feelings and thoughts. Then it was supported by evidence and analyzed it. In my writing, I didn’t retell the story. I supported it with evidence but I didn’t analyze it. So next time, I will analyze my evidence and tell why it is important. 

I did well on half of the whole assessment which was my overall, my lead, my organization, ending and spelling. I needed a three or a 2.5 on Transitions, elaboration, craft, and punctuation.

Mrs. Reuter and my PLN can help me on my new Literary essay by. Mrs. Reuter can help me with any questions I have and my PLN can help me when I look at it to reflect.

Also, I could use my DWA text and my boxes and bullets for my Literary essay too.

Let's look at the mentor text I read my essay and I knew that something could have been changed. In the book Thank you Mr.Falker the author used things that I could have used like some amazing quotes that went through the whole story. some things that I noticed were my transitions were not as smooth together. I will imitate the good things in my new essay but only the things that I did well. 

Now I just looked at the teacher writing example and I compared it to mine and there were some thing that were different but there were somethings  that were the the same. Some things that were different is that the teacher writing had more transitions than mine. But mine asked three questions in the intro and related it to patricia and the teachers example staded a fact.

         

I did a lot of good things and a lot of things I can work on. Things I did well was the overall a little bit of work but still good, and I also did well on the organization but I could still do some work on that. Another thing I did well on was ending I am proud of what I did for the ending of my essay.  Another thing I did very good was my spelling. The crafting of my essay was was very well also.

What do you need to do differently?

 Even though there was things that I did well,  there was also some things I could have improved on. For one I needed help on my lead, transitions, elaboration, and my punctuation. I know that the next essay that I do I will focus more on those things that I struggled on to get a higher score.

How can Mrs. Reuter and or your PLN help you achieve your goals?

 By going over some of the things that kids struggled on also and maybe give a mini lesson on what other people struggled on. And maybe also using every resource that I have to try to look at the resources on what the goals I want to be able to achieve.

Teacher Exemplar: I thought that there was good sentences and really strongly told use a lot of information about character that squeaky really is. I thought there was a lot of good information that would help people who read it have a lot of information about the story. I thought that it had a good thesis statement and good strong evidence to support that.

 

In the mentor text in our how to write a literary essay about theme packet, there were many things that I liked and some that I didn’t so much. Some of the things that I liked include the transitions the author used, the way the worded their topic sentence for their second body paragraph, and the way the body paragraphs were crafted.

When studying the Mentor texts and asking “what has this author done that I, too, could do?” I could do is a short conclusion, analyze, and not a very long essay. As I reviewed the text a second time I noticed that the author gave lots of good evidence to support their topic, a strong lead and conclusion that gets the reader interested, and that the author makes the essay really clear instead of making the essay confusing to follow.

In our mentor text, we got to read I saw that in the text They used their punctuation very well and in spots that total sense I will make sure to use how they insert their punctuation to help me understand how I should put into my own writing. Or how they organized their writing and how it all connected together I will make sure to use these examples to help me achieve my goals.      

      

After reading the teacher writing exemplar I noticed that the ending related real life to the book and ended with a phrase that left us with closure and it also explains what “squeaky” did in the end but also makes us want to read the book. The most important part of the ending is that it tells us about the what “squeaky” learns and a lot of other things. That what I noticed in the mentor text.

What the author did that I could do is put a more discerped word that instead of said. The author used what the characters feel and how the show it.

I’ve also just read a mentor text. It has something that I could do too. One thing that I noticed is how “As the story continues,” is a transition that I think someone who would want a 4 would use. I also think that the reasons are supported with detailed, “juicy” evidence and I could push myself to also get detailed, “juicy” evidence. As I annotated, I noticed right away how the person who wrote this essay really had to go through the story to find specific parts that could be backed up w/ lots of evidence. I also noticed how the creator of the essay included the quote where Squeaky says, “‘it’s not a real smile at all. A dumb question like that doesn’t deserve an answer.’” This is important because the essay creator included a side to Squeaky that we don’t like. I will refer to this mentor text when working on my own piece.

  I need to make sure my readers can really understand my introduction, and get what it is going to be about. Another thing I need to work on is my transition words and phrases to connect evidence back to my reasons.I need to write more reasons. I need to spread my word choices farther. Put more commas in my writing

What did I do well? 

I arranged my evidence and reasonings, to lead readers from one claim to another reason. I wrote more than one paragraph to show my claims, reasonings, and evidence. I explained most of my topic/text. I stated what the text was really about in my conclusion.

How can Mrs.Reuter and Mrs.Vega/pln help me?

I could ask Mrs.Reuter for more help if I do not understand. help At home for writing I could practice my word choice, punctuation, and commas.

What I saw in the mentor text?

I liked how they did  they’re transitions, they turned out very smoothly. I also liked how they showed what they thought about Squeaky and how she acted in the story. Something that I would want to try that they did would be in their conclusion because they summed up how Squeaky changed throughout the beginning, then the middle, then finally what Squeaky is like at the end/now.

What do you need to do differently? I did not interest readers in my argument and I did not help them understand the backstory.

How can Mrs. Reuter and/or your PLN help you achieve your goals? Mrs. Reuter can help me achieve my goals by making me stay on track she would be able to help me more if I would ask more questions.

Character-based literary essay
What I did well On my character bases literary essay  I made a claim or thesis on a topic and supported it with reasons I also wrote an introduction that led to a claim 
What do I need to do differently Next time I need to Explain the topic and I need to arrange paragraphs reasons and evidence
How can Mrs.Reuter and/or your PLN help you achieve your goals
Mrs.Reuter can help me achieve my goals by making sure I stay on track and read the rubric before I start.

 Next time I believe I should do some things differently. For example, I did not do as good as I hoped because my lead was not so great and I could do better at the ending to. I wish I would of put more effort into this piece because the overall score was not bad but I could have made it better. I could've made the lead better by really hooking the reader in and make them want to read it. This is how I could of got the grade I was hoping for and will help me learn what to change in the future essays.

 Thanks to Mrs.Reuter I got advice on what I did wrong and wright which helped me fix my mistakes and what I should keep doing also she provided us with evidence. Thanks to Mis.Reuter, I go a better grade then I would alone.

 When you read a mentor text you should look for evidence, and look for that the author I trying to tell you. Also, make sure to pick up on what the conflict is caused from and there is not always one problem throughout the story. I read and let things that were important really show in my head and wrote what I was hearing. This helped me give a stronger story to help people who read what I wrote left with answered questions and evidence to support my answer. The author gave evidence and what characters stated, which I also did. I also put strong evidence which the author did too, so it would hook readers in better. The author gave a strong lead that hooked the reader in and it had a very important role in the story. I realized the author put a life lesson in the lead paragraph. I also noticed how the author keeps adding how Squeaky's aggressive behavior affects others. In my story, I realized that I did not add things over and over again like in Raymond's Run.  I noticed that I did not hook the reader in as well too.

While looking over my character based essay I did well many things well the first thing I did well is, on supporting evidence for my reasons and explaining why I picked this evidence to analyze my statements.

Another thing I did well on is using specific words to support my reason and to build my argument.

On another thing, I did well on my character based literary essay is that I used my resources well and I used them at the right times in my essay.

Another thing I did well is arranging paragraphs to fit with my argument.

One thing I need to improve on is writing long complex and precise sentences to make my argument clear.

One other thing I need to work on is the intro, I need to pull the reader in better and making them understand my argument.

I also need to work on connecting back to my points in my conclusion so it would help me restate every statement I have had. 

I also need to work on writing more sentences to better support my argument.

Mentor Text

One thing they did well is picking a specific and precise language to support his/her argument.

One other thing he/she did well on is in the conclusion he/she connected back to the beginning and middle of the text.

The mentor wrote long and precise language that pulls the reader in to read further.

This mentor also did well in organizing he/she’s paragraphs and using correct vocabulary.

He/she used their thesis statement throughout the story which helps to prove your point/argument.

The mentor did well on not making a summary of the story but still using quotes from the text.

The author of the text did well on using the best possible quotes to support their argument.

The mentor did well on using phrases to help the reader understand the text “Even a little crack in the wall will do-that a simple smile or a change in thinking could have big results."

The author did well on telling the reader at the beginning of what squeaky was like.

What I did well in my Character Based Literary Essay is, my spelling.

What I need to do differently is I have to analyze the stuff in the story make my thesis not sound like an opinion. I also need to revise my essay over again before turning it in. I also need to include evidence to what I said in my literary essay. I should then check the rubric making sure I have the expectations down on my piece. Then  I should ask a partner from my PLN to check over my essay.

Mrs. Reuter and/or my PLN could help me achieve my goals maybe by asking me if I have the expectations of the rubric down on my essay. It might also help out if I have another pair of eyes looking at my piece.

In the mentor text I noticed that the author used a lot of hyphens saying something in the middle of the sentence. I could use this to help my reader understand more about my essay or if I need to clarify something. The author also had the same thing in all the paragraphs. I will need to keep this example with me as I write my new essay. The author doesn’t add details that don’t need to be mentioned and elaborates on a specific quote.

What I did well in my character based assessment is, I can give evidence to support hard and complicated theories about both main and minor characters from all over the story. I can also find key small details such as, dialogue that shows the motivations and conflicts of a character. My piece was very well organized as well so the reader reading my piece knows where everything is. My piece was very clear so the reader can understand what I am talking about. And finally, I had a very strong thesis statement and had a counterpoint to my ending. 

Things I have to work on is to analyze my evidence more to get a better grade. I also need to work on adding colons, semicolons, etc in the proper structure to push my work to be even better. I also need to add more transitions to make my evidence more clear and to make my piece have a good flow with it. 

In the mentor text, I noticed that the author used many different types of punctuations that I can use to make my piece make more sense. I also noticed there were many different types of transitions I could use to make my piece unique. I also noticed that that s/he had evidence from all over the text than just in one area. I can use this mentor text to make my piece much better than it was before.

Mrs. Reuter or my PLN can help me achieve my goals by checking in with me before the due date to correct my mistakes and to help me add more evidence to support a particular point. I noticed that my text wasn’t annotated enough. I could ask a PLN to help me annotate more so I can find more evidence to support my points as well. I can also ask Mrs. Reuter or a PLN to help me craft my transitions so they can fit my piece. And finally, If someone would remind me to read over the rubric and also to read over my piece to find any mistakes, will be great to push my thinking to the next level. 

In the mentor text, some of the things I like how they expand their thinking more, their punctuation, spelling and, introduction. I didn’t really not like anything. Some of the things that I may imitate are their spelling, punctuation and, transitions.