Jon-K. Google Sites Peer Feedback 2021 - 2022 by Jon.Anthony.Kohler https://padlet.com/28jkohler/vapw4d9a5wjajsfy Here, you can give me specific and valuable feedback on all of my writing pieces throughout the year! As you comment, please remember to be kind with your words. However, as you offer "Two Stars and a Wish," constructive criticism is certainly welcome! en-us 2021-10-04 14:45:39 UTC 2025-09-25 05:38:55 UTC hello@padlet.com https://padlet.net/icons/png/1f996.png Jon k https://padlet.com/28jkohler/vapw4d9a5wjajsfy/wish/1793397774 From sam g-I like your name in general it really made me want to continue to read the whole thing, I also
Agree bob Ross’s painting is quite good, something that you might want to change though is one tiny spelling mistake of velociraptor 
]]> 2021-10-05 15:01:43 UTC https://padlet.com/28jkohler/vapw4d9a5wjajsfy/wish/1793397774 Sam S. 28sschinestuhl https://padlet.com/28jkohler/vapw4d9a5wjajsfy/wish/1796630915 I love the detail you put in your writing, it was fabulous. Another thing I liked was the dinosaurs you put in, my favorite is the Valacer Raptor. My last thing for you is, I think you can make it to the NFL, if you just keep working hard you can do it.]]> 2021-10-06 14:10:22 UTC https://padlet.com/28jkohler/vapw4d9a5wjajsfy/wish/1796630915 A great writing piece 28azajac https://padlet.com/28jkohler/vapw4d9a5wjajsfy/wish/1797108065 Hey, Jon. It’s me, your very good friend, Adam. I would like to share some positive things about your writing. One positive thing about your writing was the part when you were talking about Bob Ross. I really liked this part a lot because I did not know this about you, and I got to learn more about you as a person. I also loved the part when you talked about drawing, because I also really like to draw, so I can connect to that a lot. However, I think you can make the outro just a little bit longer, and then you’ll be good. Other than that, It was a great writing piece! Also, about the NFL, just keep working hard, and you will make it, I believe you can.]]> 2021-10-06 16:20:13 UTC https://padlet.com/28jkohler/vapw4d9a5wjajsfy/wish/1797108065 Sam Gutterman https://padlet.com/28jkohler/vapw4d9a5wjajsfy/wish/1920754444 I really liked the way you described the water, and how your dad was amazed however I personally think you should change how it ends and make it a little more… “happy”

Bye Jon also happy birthday
]]> 2021-11-30 15:56:05 UTC https://padlet.com/28jkohler/vapw4d9a5wjajsfy/wish/1920754444 Tommy A. 28tanico https://padlet.com/28jkohler/vapw4d9a5wjajsfy/wish/1920763061 I thought it was really cool that you found a actual raptor claw because I am also a huge Jurassic Park fan. There was also very great detail and I felt like wile reading it I was there.]]> 2021-11-30 15:59:31 UTC https://padlet.com/28jkohler/vapw4d9a5wjajsfy/wish/1920763061 Amazing memoir, keep it up! 28azajac https://padlet.com/28jkohler/vapw4d9a5wjajsfy/wish/1920781473 Happy Birthday, Jon! It’s me, Adam, and I have read your memoir, and it was really good! I really liked that there was a lot of descriptive language in your writing, keep it up, dude!  You described a lot of things really well, like how your foot was sinking in the water. In addition to that, I really liked how your memoir had a lot of funny parts in it. In my opinion, the funniest part was when you said you were running around like a monkey trying to find his yummy banana. However, I did see a lack of inner thoughts, and I just think you can add a bit more. But other than that, your writing piece was really good! Again, Happy Birthday, and I look forward to read more writing pieces of yours!]]> 2021-11-30 16:07:03 UTC https://padlet.com/28jkohler/vapw4d9a5wjajsfy/wish/1920781473 EJ Colville 28ecolville https://padlet.com/28jkohler/vapw4d9a5wjajsfy/wish/1925917152 A strength about your memoir is that it is full of onamonapia and having the cracking noises k shrink in font like the sound was getting quieter and quieter but continues. Another incredible thing about your writing is that you also have amazing similes, for example when you said “my foot was like a prairie dog at the turtle back zoo running into its hole.” A desire I have for your memoir is that maybe you could have added a little bit more for when after you found it like did you rush inside, what did you do? But aside from all that your piece was brilliant!  
P.S. I think you might have been the first kid ever to find a real raptor claw not gonna lie!




]]> 2021-12-02 19:12:02 UTC https://padlet.com/28jkohler/vapw4d9a5wjajsfy/wish/1925917152 Really good essay! Keep it up! (Adam) 28azajac https://padlet.com/28jkohler/vapw4d9a5wjajsfy/wish/2084280594 Hello, Jon! One thing that I really like about your article is your questions because they are all so relatable and interesting. They get me wondering the exact same thing. Another star that I have for you is your descriptive scenes. I can actually picture the scenes you wrote in my head as if it was actually happening in real life. However, one thing that I found was the reason in your second CREWS paragraph in the essay, and the reason is pretty much the same as the claim. Other than that, I really enjoyed your article, and I really look forward for more from you!


]]> 2022-03-08 15:51:19 UTC https://padlet.com/28jkohler/vapw4d9a5wjajsfy/wish/2084280594 Essay 28jkohler https://padlet.com/28jkohler/vapw4d9a5wjajsfy/wish/2084307383 Wow jon i love your writing and i think its wonder full. I think you can be a really good writer. I love your warent so much i love it.❤️]]> 2022-03-08 16:04:18 UTC https://padlet.com/28jkohler/vapw4d9a5wjajsfy/wish/2084307383 EJ 28ecolville https://padlet.com/28jkohler/vapw4d9a5wjajsfy/wish/2086942996 Hey Jon! A strength in your essay, “Why Kids Should Game,” is your choice of transition words. I really liked your transition words like “to be more clear” and “for instance.” Another star in your piece is your sum it up sentences. You did a nice job of finding the right change of words from your claim sentence. However one suggestion I have is to maybe elaborate more on your anecdotes just to back yourself up a little more. Other than that small critique your piece was amazing! ]]> 2022-03-09 21:19:23 UTC https://padlet.com/28jkohler/vapw4d9a5wjajsfy/wish/2086942996 Good job my friend (from Adam) 28azajac https://padlet.com/28jkohler/vapw4d9a5wjajsfy/wish/2164551544 Hi Jon! My first star is that it was in the other kid’s point of view instead of Marcos. I was about to read the story thinking that Marco would be the main character, but I guess I was wrong. The second star is the development of the character William from mean to nice, I think the development was done well. The third star is the ending because I’m used to happy endings or cliff hangers, and this ending is different so it is nice to see something new. Your story was really good, and I look forward to your next one. :)]]> 2022-04-29 16:07:09 UTC https://padlet.com/28jkohler/vapw4d9a5wjajsfy/wish/2164551544