https://padlet.com/24mpaik/6feedback Please offer me feedback on my pieces! en-us 2017-11-29 19:20:54 UTC 2025-12-15 21:35:00 UTC hello@padlet.com https://padlet-assets.s3.amazonaws.com/icons/Clouds.png 24ltrela https://padlet.com/24mpaik/6feedback/wish/212396357 I loved when you made Lexi so dramatic at times. I also loved when you said that Lexi had a enemy  almost. There is one thing I wish for you though is that you added a metaphor to your writing, that could have elevated the story even more.



]]> 2017-12-01 18:41:04 UTC https://padlet.com/24mpaik/6feedback/wish/212396357 24ekennedy https://padlet.com/24mpaik/6feedback/wish/212397057 Hi, this is Erin K.  Your story was really great!  I loved the climax.  It was really intense and suspenseful.  You did well on that.  The whole scene where Lexi’s parents were arguing in the middle of the night emphasized this.  Secondly, you incorporated tons of inner thoughts that lets the reader better understand what Lexi is like and what goes on in her mind.  You also used unique speaker tags like shot back and confessed.  My one wish that took me awhile to come up with would probably be to emphasize the character changes.  You did great showing that she changed from pessimistic to optimistic, but in the beginning there were also some other traits I thought you might change like Lexi not being able to come up with ideas.  Maybe Jenny could come up with some ideas but Lexi comes up with the ones that were really effective in the end.  Again, I absolutely loved your story!]]> 2017-12-01 18:42:38 UTC https://padlet.com/24mpaik/6feedback/wish/212397057 https://padlet.com/24mpaik/6feedback/wish/212507601 Wow, I am still mesmerized by this story. I have so many stars, for this piece. One of which would be the way that you stretched out many moments to make them more interesting and enjoyable.For example when you write about the smoke alarm going off I felt as if I was there. All of the detail you put in was great. Another star for this piece is the way you described Lexi’s reaction to certain things. For example when Lexi rolls her eyes at her father or when she yells at her parents for arguing while she is trying to sleep. The reactions felt very real and were very well written. This was an amazing piece, however I do ave a wish for it. I think that you should’ve written more about Lexi and Jenny’s friendship. I don't really know Jenny and Lexi’s story, and why is Jenny friends with someone who is so negative? But overall you wrote an amazing story with an incredible plot. 

]]> 2017-12-02 13:52:14 UTC https://padlet.com/24mpaik/6feedback/wish/212507601 https://padlet.com/24mpaik/6feedback/wish/213043660 Your story was awesome one of the things that I highly enjoyed in your story was your ending I think it wrapped the story up and it made sure the solution was visible and that everyone one new the solution in your story. Another thing that I enjoyed is you had very good use of action words for example I saw that you mentioned trudged a couple times also you used the word hollered instead of shouted when the teacher was trying to correct her skills at basketball. Although your story was great there is one thing that you could add in wich would be that you should describe how your character looks. During the whole story I did not know what your character looked. ]]> 2017-12-04 19:37:06 UTC https://padlet.com/24mpaik/6feedback/wish/213043660