https://padlet.com/mrswparoa/to2he985o07i Winning Student Chapter Exemplar - elaborated (success criteria to be co-constructed) en-us 2017-07-02 07:08:17 UTC 2017-07-02 21:44:17 UTC hello@padlet.com mrswparoa https://padlet.com/mrswparoa/to2he985o07i/wish/177879801 “Follow me” she whispered, “huh!” I said. “Shut up, do you want to be caught” she hissed at me. “Caught by who” I whispered back, “ummm, I’m not sure exactly but there is someone looking for you.” The lady ducked behind a building and then sprinted towards an old shipping container. She then paused swiveled towards me. “Are you coming” she said to me, “Yes” I said and ran after her. The lady tapped the container and a hatch opened in the side. I climbed through and found myself in a room, the lady followed me through and marched over to a dusty computer on a desk in one corner of the room. “I doubt that works anymore” I started to say but the lady cut me off with a simple “shut up.” The computer whirred to life and the lady picked up a walkie-talkie off the desk and spoke into it, “Agent P16 reporting, I have him.” Someone answered back “password” the lady looked around to make sure no one was listening before whispering something. The lady turned back to me, “get ready” she said. “Ready for whaaaattttttttttt” I screamed as the floor beneath me gave way.

All I could see was inky blackness all around me, but then a speck of light appeared below me. The light got closer and closer until it covered all of my peripheral vision. I tried to take my eyes off the blinding light but I couldn’t. I closed my eyes but the heat of the light singed my eyelids and forced my eyes. Then I saw something blue in the light, I peered closer and saw… water? Suddenly the light turned off and I saw that I had been right, I was indeed falling towards a pool of water. Just before my body broke the surface I closed my eyes and prepared myself for the impact. BAM! I hit the water so hard that it knocked me out cold.

I woke up in a bed with a middle-aged woman standing over me. “Are you my Mom” I asked weakly, “She laughed “no child I am not but you will meet your mother soon enough.” She told me. A rush of excitement coursed through me, I was going to see my Mom soon. A couple of hours later the woman told me to get out of bed and follow her. I did so and she lead me to a small office where another woman was crouched over a desk working. The first lady knocked on the door and called out “Isabel, Jake is here.” Isabell jumped up and walked to the door, “Jake!” called out Isabel. “Mom!” I cried back, I ran towards her and hugged her. “Now Jake come with me and I will show you what I have been doing since your father kicked me out” Mom said.  Mom showed down the corridor to a small red door. Mom opened the door and what was inside shocked me so much I nearly fainted. It was a...]]> 2017-07-02 07:11:54 UTC https://padlet.com/mrswparoa/to2he985o07i/wish/177879801 mrswparoa https://padlet.com/mrswparoa/to2he985o07i/wish/177879923 The computer 'whirred' to life. Sometimes when we're told to use better verbs, we get carried away and use them out of context. Well done Jack for choosing a verb that is perfect for the subject - the computer. ]]> 2017-07-02 07:16:18 UTC https://padlet.com/mrswparoa/to2he985o07i/wish/177879923 mrswparoa https://padlet.com/mrswparoa/to2he985o07i/wish/177879976 ...the lady looked around to make sure no one was listening before whispering something...

Great authors do this with incredible skill (read Lord of the Flies by William Golding. ]]> 2017-07-02 07:18:28 UTC https://padlet.com/mrswparoa/to2he985o07i/wish/177879976