8-4's Author's Craft Revision Examples by Anne Marie Chow https://padlet.com/anc3_3/tk8n6q2wtc8z Share your before and after work to inspire your classmates. Feel free to request feedback. en-us 2018-03-18 08:20:05 UTC 2018-03-23 08:46:39 UTC hello@padlet.com Pauline https://padlet.com/anc3_3/tk8n6q2wtc8z/wish/244849972 Before:  He was lending 2 very precious items to her, and it took an amount of trust and confidentiality for him to do so giving that anything could happen to them.

After" Lending these 2 very precious and significant items to Eleanor took  a certain amount of trust and confidentiality in order for him to do so, giving these items held much importance and significance to Park. ]]> 2018-03-22 06:43:24 UTC https://padlet.com/anc3_3/tk8n6q2wtc8z/wish/244849972 Poppy https://padlet.com/anc3_3/tk8n6q2wtc8z/wish/244850269 Before: In the middle of ‘Afterworlds’ when Yama gives Liz the bracelet a symbol of love and trust is shown between the two characters. When Yama gives Liz the bracelet, Yama tells Liz; “This is a symbol of my love and trust to you” then Liz continues on to say “Wow...thank you so much Yama”  One would say that the author used the bracelet as a symbol to show that Liz can trust Yama with everything, and Yama will always accept her no matter what. The reader can see a level of trust already built from this moment, how one small object can symbolise so much and mean so much to one person. How a bracelet can ‘symbolise a whole world of emotions.’ 
After: (not completely done) In the middle of ‘Afterworlds’ when Yama gives Liz the bracelet a symbol of love and trust is shown between the two characters. When Yama gives Liz the bracelet, Yama tells Liz; “This is a symbol of my love and trust to you” then Liz continues on to say “Wow...thank you so much Yama” The above change in emotions and mood is a turning point in the story, where Scott Westfield conveys that the power of acceptance can help you come closer and trust your loved ones. One would say that the author used the bracelet as a symbol to show that Liz can trust Yama with everything, and Yama will always accept her no matter what. The reader can see a level of trust already built from this moment, how the power of accepting someone or yourself can allow you to trust others and form stronger relationships.  


]]> 2018-03-22 06:46:05 UTC https://padlet.com/anc3_3/tk8n6q2wtc8z/wish/244850269 As we have seen throughout the book the author has used numerous ways to show how the characters have changed because of friendship and how they have changed on the inside to, with how they think and interact with each other, they show how they have come together. The author helps us understand that it’s not just about you're alter ego making you do what you want, but rather what you need. It shows us that sometimes all you need is a good friend who can help you change for the better. netti351341 https://padlet.com/anc3_3/tk8n6q2wtc8z/wish/244850350 p.s still needs revising as I didn't have a conclusion before, but now I have a template for what it might have. 

]]> 2018-03-22 06:46:30 UTC https://padlet.com/anc3_3/tk8n6q2wtc8z/wish/244850350 Sarah https://padlet.com/anc3_3/tk8n6q2wtc8z/wish/244850395 The narrator states that “ You weren't weirded out that i’m a ghost, because i’m dead, gone, disgusting.  Why do you want to be my friend.” Above here is where the author changed the mood in a way, because in paragraph 2 it stated that Liz would like to be her friend.Since Mindy has hardly have any form of human contact and if she had they were terrible. She doesn’t accept herself due to her being dead, the author was able to change the mood quickly through just one sentence. This displays the theme of acceptance on how she doesn’t like who she is because of the pass connections/meetings she had with other human, but also how Liz accepted who she is because Liz was in the same position she was in before. 

- Just started working on this today ]]> 2018-03-22 06:46:55 UTC https://padlet.com/anc3_3/tk8n6q2wtc8z/wish/244850395 Louis anc3_3 https://padlet.com/anc3_3/tk8n6q2wtc8z/wish/244850406 2018-03-22 06:47:02 UTC https://padlet.com/anc3_3/tk8n6q2wtc8z/wish/244850406 Louis anc3_3 https://padlet.com/anc3_3/tk8n6q2wtc8z/wish/244850409 2018-03-22 06:47:06 UTC https://padlet.com/anc3_3/tk8n6q2wtc8z/wish/244850409 Louis anc3_3 https://padlet.com/anc3_3/tk8n6q2wtc8z/wish/244850415 Before
 In the book ‘Masterminds,’ Gordon Korman uses symbolism, dialogue and connection to show how the children discover the truth.
After
Imagine if you were living in the unknown. You had endless questions and every time you think you are getting closer you lose a bit of yourself. In the book the characters are left in the unknown while they try get to the bottom of the towns cone factory unknown. They are trying to find the truth but some people are getting in the way. In the book ‘Masterminds,’ Gordon Korman uses symbolism, dialogue and connection to show how the children discover the truth.

]]> 2018-03-22 06:47:10 UTC https://padlet.com/anc3_3/tk8n6q2wtc8z/wish/244850415 Ashley https://padlet.com/anc3_3/tk8n6q2wtc8z/wish/244850459 2018-03-22 06:47:40 UTC https://padlet.com/anc3_3/tk8n6q2wtc8z/wish/244850459 Clement wang35880 https://padlet.com/anc3_3/tk8n6q2wtc8z/wish/244850492 Before:One of the crafts that Neal Shusterman used was internal thinking. He used this to show how they were adapting to their new mentors and how they were changing to share similar values. This could be seen on page 251 where Rowan writes in his journal “Training under Scythe Goddard is different from Scythe Faraday, it is intense, physical. If I am a weapon then Im being sharpened against a grindstone every day.” Another way he used internal thinking was when Citra was with Scythe Curie when she stabbed an unsuspecting man on the sidewalk, Citra later blurred out words of anger towards Scythe Curie with her explaining why she had done that even thinking “ I had to admit that Scythe Curie was right and that there was a certain amount of decorum required of an apprentice.” These things showed that through the trials and challenges, the two students are starting to understand what their mentors value and slowly are learning to do so too.



After: One of the crafts that Neal Shusterman used was internal thinking. He used this to show how they were changing when learning values from their mentors. This could be seen on page 251 where Rowan writes in his journal “Training under Scythe Goddard is different from Scythe Faraday, it is intense, physical. If I am a weapon then im being sharpened against a grindstone every day.”  Another way he used internal thinking was when Citra was with Scythe Curie when she stabbed an unsuspecting man on the sidewalk, Citra later blurred out words of anger towards Scythe Curie, Scythe Curie then explained why she had done that. That death comes in the most unexpected time and Citra responded with. “I had to admit that Scythe Curie was right and that there was a certain amount of decorum required of an apprentice.” These events showed that through the trials, the two students are starting to understand what their mentors value and are slowly learning to value them too.]]> 2018-03-22 06:47:57 UTC https://padlet.com/anc3_3/tk8n6q2wtc8z/wish/244850492 Anaya monap124881 https://padlet.com/anc3_3/tk8n6q2wtc8z/wish/244850495 2018-03-22 06:48:01 UTC https://padlet.com/anc3_3/tk8n6q2wtc8z/wish/244850495 As we have seen throughout the book the author has used numerous ways to show how the characters have changed because of friendship and how they have changed on the inside to, with how they think and interact with each other, they show how they have come together. The author helps us understand that it’s not just about you're alter ego making you do what you want, but rather what you need. It shows us that sometimes all you need is a good friend who can help you change for the better. netti351341 https://padlet.com/anc3_3/tk8n6q2wtc8z/wish/244850496 p.s I din't have a conclusion before so this still needs revising]]> 2018-03-22 06:48:01 UTC https://padlet.com/anc3_3/tk8n6q2wtc8z/wish/244850496 In Messenger, trade symbolises the dark cravings that lie in our mind. The cravings that only seem to be satisfied by possessions. The trade-master in the book entices with more, but only gives less. After reading the book, one would certainly notice that Messenger was against materialism. However while finishing the book, it’s hard not to wonder why the people of Village decided to trade in the first place. prabh328981 https://padlet.com/anc3_3/tk8n6q2wtc8z/wish/244850501 2018-03-22 06:48:04 UTC https://padlet.com/anc3_3/tk8n6q2wtc8z/wish/244850501 T https://padlet.com/anc3_3/tk8n6q2wtc8z/wish/244850522 When the Mill is first mentioned it is used to symbolise hope for a better future.  I think that the Mill symbolises hope when it is first introduced because it is introduced as something that is going to change their lives for the better to all of the other animals.  Although the Mill would take a long long time to build, it would help them later on.


When the Mill is first mentioned it is used to symbolise hope for a better future.  I think that the Mill symbolises hope when it is first introduced because it is introduced as something that is going to change their lives for the better to all of the other animals.  Although the Mill would take a long long time to build, it would help them later on.  On P51 George Orwell says  “All that year the animals worked like slaves. But they were all happy in their work; they grudged no effort or sacrifice, well aware that everything they did was for the benefit of themselves” This shows that the animals are trying to keep a positive mindset towards the construction of the mill.

]]> 2018-03-22 06:48:17 UTC https://padlet.com/anc3_3/tk8n6q2wtc8z/wish/244850522 Hiro https://padlet.com/anc3_3/tk8n6q2wtc8z/wish/244850535 Before
We don’t always get to make our own decision, but we still have freedom. If your Jonas, that’s different. In the book ‘The Giver’ by Lois Lowry the characters in the book get no freedom or any choice of their own. In the book the author uses ‘memories’ to represent the people’s choice and freedom.

After
We don’t always get to make our own decision, but we still have freedom. If you’re Jonas, that would’ve been different. In the book ‘The Giver’ by Lois Lowry the characters in the book get no freedom or any choice of their own. At his 12th birthday all the 12 year olds get to be assigned jobs. Jonas was special. He got assigned the ‘receiver of memories’. Throughout the book he learns many important aspects that his community is missing. And Jonas realises that it’s not right. In the book the author uses ‘memories’ to represent the people’s choice and freedom.

]]> 2018-03-22 06:48:24 UTC https://padlet.com/anc3_3/tk8n6q2wtc8z/wish/244850535 Jack https://padlet.com/anc3_3/tk8n6q2wtc8z/wish/244850536 After: Now yes everyone wishes it was a holiday everyday, however for august, it’s something deeper. “When I’m in my costume, nobody notices me, nobody knows me, I don’t look weird” At halloween it is the only time of the year where wearing a mask is normal, and looking ordinary is what Auggie to be, it’s what he’s always wanted to be. ]]> 2018-03-22 06:48:24 UTC https://padlet.com/anc3_3/tk8n6q2wtc8z/wish/244850536 AK https://padlet.com/anc3_3/tk8n6q2wtc8z/wish/244850633 before: 
Many believe that size can matter and that big is better than small. But in the story “Scythe” by Neal Shusterman it shows that something as small as a ring can control something as big as the whole population of the world. 

after:
Many believe that size matters a lot and that big is better than small. In the story “Scythe” written by Neal Shusterman, mankind has beaten death, and inorder to escape overpopulation people would be gleaned by Scythes at a random pick. But there is a way to escape a gleaning, and that’s by kissing the Scythe’s ring. Shusterman gives the statement that small can be better and more powerful than big, by using the habits of repetition and symbolism

]]> 2018-03-22 06:49:09 UTC https://padlet.com/anc3_3/tk8n6q2wtc8z/wish/244850633 Dhruv https://padlet.com/anc3_3/tk8n6q2wtc8z/wish/244850659 Conclusion - 
In conclusion, Amani’s sheema is a good example of symbolism in the book, and the ideas the the sheema presents are differing themes of love and deception. 


Revised Conclusion - 
In Rebel of the Sands, Hamilton's clever use of symbolism makes the book a great read, giving the reader new ideas on important themes like deception, and love.

]]> 2018-03-22 06:49:23 UTC https://padlet.com/anc3_3/tk8n6q2wtc8z/wish/244850659 Ashley https://padlet.com/anc3_3/tk8n6q2wtc8z/wish/244850677 2018-03-22 06:49:31 UTC https://padlet.com/anc3_3/tk8n6q2wtc8z/wish/244850677