Analysis of Exemplar EE's by Subject Group" by Corryn Smith https://padlet.com/csmith301/tgpiybbiwv7ibo1f en-us 2020-07-31 09:13:21 UTC 2021-08-17 14:49:52 UTC hello@padlet.com Group 2 csmith301 https://padlet.com/csmith301/tgpiybbiwv7ibo1f/wish/1669343556
Group Members: 

EE SAMPLE (Title):

the Organization of the essay
including table of contents and body paragraphs. Citations and Referencing:



Knowledge of the subject matter:



The student/ writer's Engagement with the
subject:]]> 2021-08-04 23:04:56 UTC https://padlet.com/csmith301/tgpiybbiwv7ibo1f/wish/1669343556 Group 3 (Business) csmith301 https://padlet.com/csmith301/tgpiybbiwv7ibo1f/wish/1669343643 Group Members: 
Andrew Lotzof
Joo Ha Choi
Victoria Jang
Mikyla Cortes
Mikaela Fua
Daniella Dyhianto
Stephanie Villamor
Stefen Hermias
Renzo King
Roy

EE SAMPLE (Title): Online Retail Lazada VS Traditional Retail SM

the Organization of the essay
including table of contents and body paragraphs. Citations and Referencing:

We think that the writer is well organized with the overall format of the EE from top to bottom. The writer makes proper use of the table of contents and the heading, which gives a good idea of what each body paragraphs will be about. The way that the citations are structured are also proper since it has been sorted alphabetically and leave out a "hook" so that the author/title of the website is first while the other information of the sources are indented. Furthermore, they make good use of in text citations with the author's name and date in most body paragraphs.

Knowledge of the subject matter:
The author did a pretty good job with showing his/her knowledge. The work shows thoroughly researched data with proofs of tables, charts, and in text citations. Furthermore, he/she compared their evidence with modern day examples such as Amazon, Walmart, etc. This shows that the writer has done extra research and used his/her previous knowledge about the topic to create better arguments. Plus, the writer shows cohesive connections with his/her previous claims of the topic stated in the previous pages of the essay. This shows that the writer has excellent researching skills with the continuous connections made all throughout the study.

The student/ writer's Engagement with the
subject:
The research done on the Lazada EE Business topic is easy to understand, showing that the writer is well engaged with the topic since he/she uses examples and credible arguments to make it easier to understand for the readers. The writer is able to engage and elaborate more into different topics of e-commerce after carefully deliberating on the main subject of Lazada. This shows how the writer is able to engage into the topic of business management in a more in-depth level with a profound Extended Essay work.

Criterion A:
-clear and concise topic of comparing x vs y
-in-depth research question, pointing out the specific factor to be researched on, "marketing strategies". 
-methodology shows a well understandable work process specified in the table of contents from intro, to the body deliberating steps 3.1 to 3.8, until the conclusion.

the author also shows a great understanding on the Criterion B-D with his in-depth research that showed through the context of the EE and his way of communicating it to the readers. 

Two of the reasons why the EE was successful was because the person evaluated the data they had really well and they excelled in critical thinking. The other reason is presentation. The organization of their EE was really well done. It was easy to follow and it was easy to find things when you are scanning the document.

B: Knowledge and understanding
The writer's knowledge and understanding was evident. The context and the communication of the EE is clear with the examples states. 

the EE makes use of business terminology and expounds on those terms as they use critical thinking and analyze how these terms function and how they can be applied to the context of the research question being explored

D: Presentation
The table of contents was very organized and the author made good use of the graphs they included to support their essay. 
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]]> 2021-08-04 23:05:05 UTC https://padlet.com/csmith301/tgpiybbiwv7ibo1f/wish/1669343643 Group 4 (Psychology) csmith301 https://padlet.com/csmith301/tgpiybbiwv7ibo1f/wish/1669343692 Group Members:
Isabelle Fernan
Karen Yamaguchi
Thomas Kim
Sophia Nacua

EE SAMPLE (Title): Effectiveness of Corporal Punishment

Organization of the Essay (including table of contents and body paragraphs):
  • The essay's topic is introduced well. It establishes a proper definition of corporal punishment, provides historical background and social context supported by statistics, and determines why it is a controversial issue whose efficacy needs to be examined at both sides.
  • The contents of the essay are divided clearly and sensibly. There is a concise introduction of the topic, two body sections exploring the extent of its effectiveness and ineffectiveness, and an action-based conclusion built on from evidences stated in the body.
  • The links between the cited studies are coherent, making the transitions between the different paragraphs smooth. 

Citations and Referencing:
  • The reference section is organized and clean. Not only are they formatted in in proper APA citation, meaning they include the author, the date it was published, the title and the specific pages the data was taken from, but they are also alphabetically arranged. This makes it easier to find the sources of data in the essay.
  • The author also uses in-text citation; after displaying data or quotes, the author writes from which author or article said data comes from and the date it was published. This is important because if anyone was interested in certain information, they would know where to look in the reference section for the source.

Knowledge of the subject matter:
  • The writer answered the research question, which questions the relationship between parent's corporal punishment and child's behavior in long term, gradually by dividing the writing into different parts: Introduction, the analysis of corporal punishment study, evaluation of the study, and conclusion. 
  • Each section of the writing contains detailed relevant information about the topic. Indeed, an introduction has historical information and a recent study about corporal punishment. This is followed by two paragraphs analyzing two different studies about corporal punishment and children's behavior. Furthermore, evaluation of the experiment method for the reader to evaluate the extent of corporal punishment while being aware of the flaws that might influence the results. Lastly, the writer ends the writing with his/her perspective about the corporal punishment's extent on children's behavior by comparing the efficiency and the risk of the punishment.

The student/writer's engagement with the
subject:
  • The research done on the effectiveness of Corporal Punishment EE is comprehensive and understandable. 
  •  The author uses several examples and cites multiple other studies to prove their point and to engage their readers.
  •  The author shows great knowledge and understanding as they are able to cover several different aspects and possibilities concerning the topic of the EE.
]]> 2021-08-04 23:05:10 UTC https://padlet.com/csmith301/tgpiybbiwv7ibo1f/wish/1669343692 Group 5 csmith301 https://padlet.com/csmith301/tgpiybbiwv7ibo1f/wish/1669343738 Group Members: 

EE SAMPLE (Title):

the Organization of the essay
including table of contents and body paragraphs. Citations and Referencing:



Knowledge of the subject matter:



The student/ writer's Engagement with the
subject:]]> 2021-08-04 23:05:16 UTC https://padlet.com/csmith301/tgpiybbiwv7ibo1f/wish/1669343738 Group 6 csmith301 https://padlet.com/csmith301/tgpiybbiwv7ibo1f/wish/1669343797 Group Members: 

EE SAMPLE (Title):

the Organization of the essay
including table of contents and body paragraphs. Citations and Referencing:



Knowledge of the subject matter:



The student/ writer's Engagement with the
subject:]]> 2021-08-04 23:05:23 UTC https://padlet.com/csmith301/tgpiybbiwv7ibo1f/wish/1669343797 Group 1 csmith301 https://padlet.com/csmith301/tgpiybbiwv7ibo1f/wish/1669343920 Group Members: 

EE SAMPLE (Title):

the Organization of the essay
including table of contents and body paragraphs. Citations and Referencing:



Knowledge of the subject matter:



The student/ writer's Engagement with the
subject:]]> 2021-08-04 23:05:38 UTC https://padlet.com/csmith301/tgpiybbiwv7ibo1f/wish/1669343920 Group 8 csmith301 https://padlet.com/csmith301/tgpiybbiwv7ibo1f/wish/1669583102 Group Members: 

EE SAMPLE (Title):

the Organization of the essay
including table of contents and body paragraphs. Citations and Referencing:



Knowledge of the subject matter:



The student/ writer's Engagement with the
subject:]]> 2021-08-05 03:45:23 UTC https://padlet.com/csmith301/tgpiybbiwv7ibo1f/wish/1669583102 Group 4 (Biology) csmith301 https://padlet.com/csmith301/tgpiybbiwv7ibo1f/wish/1669583778 Group Members: Jhirlymarie (Jia) Tio

EE SAMPLE (Title): A Study on the Short-Term Effects of the Antioxidants Vitamin C and Vitamin E on the Human Immune System

the Organization of the essay
including table of contents and body paragraphs. Citations and Referencing:

- The table of contents were clear and concise.

- The contents under each chapter were appropriate. (ex: Chapter 1 includes the "The Immune System" and "Antioxidants and Vitamins")

-Chapter 1 includes the introductory information for the Immune System and both Vitamins C and E. It also includes information on bacteria and how it is killed/eradicated by our immunes system.  Their information on Vitamin C and Vitamin E is precise and the researcher easily differentiated and gave information on the two. A lot of in-text citations are used in Chapter 1, which makes the study more reliable. 

-Chapter 2 includes the methods of how the research was done. The researcher immediately stated the scope and limitations of the research, which is very important. They also stated where they are getting their information for their investigation. The researcher also gave a span of time the research should ideally be conducted within, so that the research places more focus instead of having it too broad. The researcher also explained the hypothesis of their research. 

- Chapter 3 shows a lot of graphs from different journals. The researcher does a good job at interpreting the information to fit into the area of study that he/she is doing. The researcher makes sure to cite their sources in almost every sentence and paragraph here, which is good. The tables created by the researcher is well done and based on the research findings. There are many tables made by both the researcher and the sources he/she got them from. Overall, there is a lot of information, and it is interpreted properly by the researcher. 

-Chapter 4 is a clear outline of the researcher's conclusion on the research. It is the clearest of all the chapters (in my opinion) because it uses shorter sentences compared to the Chapter 3. 

-Chapter 5 tells the readers about the evaluation. They clearly state that the strengths they had were using reputable sources. The researchers indeed used reputable sources, and those sources were then backed up by other studies. This makes the study even more reliable. 

- Overall, the researchers clearly stated information about their topic. They made sure that they focused solely on what they said they would focus on. The provided a scope and a limitation to their research. With their hypothesis, they made sure that the readers knew what the study was trying to prove. 

Knowledge of the subject matter: 

-Through reading this research paper, the readers will be able to learn about human immune systems and how they fight bacteria and viruses. The readers will learn about the effectivity of Vitamin C and Vitamin E in strengthening the immune system and other cells. 

The student/ writer's Engagement with the
subject:

-The researcher did not have full hands-on experimentation, because they were limited by not having a lab. 

-The researcher used reliable sources and cited their sources as well. 

-The researcher did not specify the age groups, weight, heights, and etc. of the people in the researches that they used. A lot of gray area with the bracket of people that were tested in the study. ]]> 2021-08-05 03:46:05 UTC https://padlet.com/csmith301/tgpiybbiwv7ibo1f/wish/1669583778 Group 4 csmith301 https://padlet.com/csmith301/tgpiybbiwv7ibo1f/wish/1669584009 Group Members: 

EE SAMPLE (Title):

the Organization of the essay
including table of contents and body paragraphs. Citations and Referencing:



Knowledge of the subject matter:



The student/ writer's Engagement with the
subject:]]> 2021-08-05 03:46:20 UTC https://padlet.com/csmith301/tgpiybbiwv7ibo1f/wish/1669584009 Group 4 (Biology) https://padlet.com/csmith301/tgpiybbiwv7ibo1f/wish/1669606838 Group Members: Camille Go, Heinz Tan, Eunjeong Lim

EE SAMPLE (Title): Preservation of Ascorbic Acid Concentration in Apples with Essential Oils

Organization:

  • The transition of topics in each paragraph was very smooth which made it easier for the readers to comprehend. 
  • Procedures, Data, and results were well presented.
  • The table of contents and body paragraphs were all formatted and organized properly.
  • Appendices, citations, and sources are formatted correctly and arranged in alphabetical order.


Knowledge of the subject matter and the student/ writer's engagement with the
subject:
  • The researcher explained the topic thoroughly and expressed his or her knowledge effectively. 
  • The researcher included relevant details and information on the topics.
  • Overall, a complete understanding of the subject was demonstrated throughout the essay and a great amount of effort was placed in the creation of this essay. 


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