Use the stall technique: For this scenario the stall technique would be me saying that I am not comfortable with the comment they made and their use of the term dyke. I would ask the staff member to have a conversation about their comment at a later time such as after school is done for the day or during lunch tomorrow. The successful part I could see would be having the staff member recognize it was harmful and they could issue an apology for the comment. A potential challenge would be the staff member would not be willing to have a conversation later and they disregard me being uncomfortable with what they said if I am the only one who speaks up.

Make it personal: I would say to the staff member that I was offended by their comment about our colleague because they are someone we work with and someone that I respect as a colleague and potentially a friend of mine. The success this technique could provide is having the staff member understand their comment was offensive and that they should avoid similar statements moving forward. The potential challenge would be if they assume that I am trying to push an agenda by defending my colleague or that I am serving as an ally out of self interest. 

Call it what it is: I would tell the staff member what they said was homophobic. The success that could come from this technique is a better understanding of what is offensive and having a conversation about intent and how what we say can impact someone else. The challenge for this technique would be that the staff member denies that what they said is homophobic and that they are not willing to engage with a conversation with me or other colleagues about their comment.

Assume the best: For this case, I would have to assume that the staff member is unaware of the derogatory nature of the term dyke and they did not mean to potentially offend our colleague with their statement. The successful part of this technique would be that we show an empathetic demeanor toward both people involved and it can possibly lead to a conversation about what is acceptable to say and what isn’t. The potential challenge would be that the staff is not made aware of their hateful language and may continue to express similar sentiments either intentionally or unintentionally.

Ask a question: The question I would ask in this situation would be why the staff member found it necessary to make the comment and include using the term dyke. The success of this strategy would depend on the staff member recognizing it was an unnecessary comment and they realize it could be seen as inappropriate. The challenge would be a potential conflict occurring if the other staff member feels they are being unfairly  questioned and may want to disengage in the conversation.

Use education: I would most likely use education in this context by explaining the negative connotation that has been associated with the term dyke and the discrimination that the LGBTQ+ community faces. The successful aspect here could be the staff member gaining a better understanding of LGBTQ+ history and how it continues to be a community that continues to face discrimination today. The challenge of using education here could be that the staff member does not value learning what I told them and do not acknowledge it and proceed as if nothing that occurred is worthwhile.

Reference norms or policy: I would reiterate to the staff member that the school values diversity of the human experience and that using derogatory language is not acceptable. The success from this strategy would be that the staff member would understand and would either apologize for using the term dyke and would make an effort to avoid using it in the future. The challenge here would be that the policies outlined by the school would be more directed toward student behavior and that the policies may not be applicable to them and that they are not likely to face any discipline for their comments.

What is the problem or issue? 

The usage of “faggot” or “gay” passively, is judgmental, bigoted, oppressive, ignorant, in any way shape or form to those of the LGBQT community. 

How might people be affected in this situation?

Already knowing where I stand and how I feel about this word hence my sister being gay, I find it highly offensive. I feel like if you are calling one person “faggot”, you are including everybody else in that category. For the victim, look at case study number 2. That's how far it can go if the word is excessively abused on somebody. For Ann and Carol, we do not know their situation. They could be in the same spectrum as me where someone is gay in their family or, they know somebody who's been psychologically bullied and abused for being homosexual. And as for the "friends", I know for a fact if they haven't been checked about it correctly, they are probably still using it after the millionth time. They could have learned it at home, with friends, the media, and probably have been using it whenever there is a free environment to do so ... maybe not. 

What, if anything, should you or Carol do?

I would have Carol accompany me as I walk over to the students who used said language. I would ask them to stop what they are doing and follow us outside for a moment. The first thing I would ask is if they know why I'm having a private talk with them. I want to see if they acknowledge the fact they made a mistake. It will show me as a teacher they are willing to fess up to what they said with dignity. The second question I'd ask is if they understood the word they had used on the student. If they did not, I would educate them on the meaning of the word carefully in the right context of course. I won't get into a lot of depth but I'd let them know how it is offensively used against those who are gay and when saying this word to somebody who might or might not be gay is unacceptable and I also revert back to my answer I used for “What is the problem or issue?”. The last question I would ask is how do you think I would feel, Carol would feel, the student would feel, and even yourselves would feel to be called something you are or not in a demeaning way? I would finish it off with these final words. Every word has meaning, I do not care if it was poor choice of words, if it was an accident, you said what you said and it hurts not only the student you said the word to, it hurts us as teachers, the embodiment and pride of the school, and most of all, you as a student who knows they are better than that.

What, if any, role should the administration and classroom teachers take in addressing this issue? 

I was also thinking about involving the principal in our chat, but not sure when it would be the right time or if it is really necessary. They will know they are in big trouble if the head honcho is coming though I'd prefer to take it head on with Carol at my side. If the principal does join in, I would probably run what happened by him / her beforehand so they can decide for them to take care of it themselves or, let me try to educate the students in an appropriate school-like manner. I think at the end of the day, somebody who has more authority or someone like Carol should absolutely be in this scenario because you really do not know how students will react to these situations. so you do not want to leave yourself vulnerable.