Nora Sell (sophomore, youth minister, can do the worm)

Lorelai Raedeke (freshman, environmental science major, never lived in house)

Lily Hood (freshman, social work major, cracked at gaga ball)

Faith Kerr (freshman, social work major, touch tongue to nose)

• Showing up for someone is huge! Simply being there for someone and walking through life with them, encouraging them can impact their life drastically, remaining consistent with fidelity.  

• Children want to be what they see, meaning we need to set good examples for those who are looking up to us, showing them a Christ-like example and taking time to disciple their lives. 

• We need to realize that sin is at the core of all problems. Acknowledging that sin only corrupts and by working from the root up would help solve issues more steadily than blaming other factors for the problem.

• There is a need for formal and informal mentors right around us. We don’t have to go searching for needs across the world to send out tithing money/time to. I can do research for organizations or just look around my neighborhood and church to be a mentor for those in need.  

• Another thing that stood out to me was that communication and consistency are crucial in relationships. The woman mentioned consistency towards the end being important for security for kids and how they take that stuff so personally if you are not clear and do not explain and communicate our absence. 

• Even if a mentor is in the kid’s life for only a few years, a steady, loving relationship with an adult man or older “brother” makes a significant impression. As a mentor, you don’t need to be perfect or a surrogate father, but you can be a role model and a source of a steady, healthy relationship.  

Summary: This podcast talks of the importance of living a life of a Biblical worldview. More specifically, living this life within the range of marriage and parenting is crucial. Having a Biblical worldview will lead to a strong and successful marriage. This podcast also touches on why having a strong marriage is so important when it specifically comes to parenting.

 My Takeaways:

• Parents cannot and should not put this expectation of paradise on anything. They cannot think that their children will bring them paradise (or their marriage, etc.).

• You cannot put expectations on your child. Any sort of expectation leaves you hurt and hopeless, then leading to affecting your relationship with those you expected from.

• With the way God created, we are naturally going to be in awe of something. Our awe is originally meant to be for God. But, with the world we live in, our desires take control of our hearts. With this being said, we should still strive every day to be in awe of God in everything we do. This should be obvious to others and encouraging (especially to our children).

• There are two ways to parent: the ambassador way or the ownership way. Parenting in the form of ownership means “what do I want for my children, what do I want them to be, and what do I want from them” (words I used from a previous assignment in OVC). It puts you as the parent in the focal point of everything, expecting everyone and everything to revolve around you. It’s all selfish based. But, the ambassador's parenting style is to represent Christ. To understand that God wants us to lead our children to Him, not ourselves. We should be “driven by His message, His methods, His character… We are only to exercise God’s authority (His love, His grace, His protection, etc.)” (words I used from a previous assignment in OVC).

• A child learns love through being loved. A child feels security through being secured. They experience these things through others, but the biggest impact of understanding God’s love is through our earthly fathers. If a child does not have a present or a stable earthly father, then it messes up the image of God and His love for us. We cannot let these kids go on with life like this. We are called to try to fill this gap with fathers a part of the body of Christ to step in. Children need an adult who is consistent and will show up for them, who will see them and hear them, who will love them, and most importantly point them to the love of God.

• Simply being in a category that is known for being worse off does not mean you will be worse off. 

• Be careful about how you talk about statistics and likelihoods. Clarify that the statistics aren’t a locked box children can’t escape, but rather a danger to avoid.

• Stereotyping people off of the parental situation is not a fair representation of what a person's life will turn out to be.

• Don’t allow what's outside to control you. 

• Children learn by what they see around them.

• Acceptance builds confidence, community nurtures it, and the wonder affirms it.

• Procrastination is an assassination to your destination. 

Understanding the challenges fathers face can help create better support programs. Fatherlessness also affects communities, contributing to higher crime rates and educational struggles. In churches, strong fathers are essential for guiding children’s spiritual growth, reinforcing the importance of effective family leadership for healthier communities.

• if their earthly father leaves them, that impacts how they view their heavenly Father and skew the relationship between God and the child.

• Furthermore, their perception of themselves and their self image can be warped.

• Trust issues can come up in their relationship with others

• Creation can be a possible place for consistency and healing for the child.

https://www.ted.com/talks/kent_d_ballard_jr_the_life_long_impact_of_absent_fathers?subtitle=en

Summary:

There are different types of fathers that each person experiences. There is the, “Disney dad” who is up for anything, always available for anything.  The “hollow dad” is in the home but is emotionally unavailable. The “peekaboo dad” is constantly in and out of the child's home. The “hopscotch dad” is in and out of the child's life due to legal reasons. Finally there are “angel dads” who are gone due to death. He defines “Fatherlessness” as putting the responsibility of being engaging, enlightening, encouraging, and equipping their children. The children who have these attributes influenced on them are more inclined to be better emotionally, physically, educationally, and spiritually prominent. This then feeds into how they grow up into who they are as adults. 

Takeaways:

• 70% of African American kids grow up without a father

• Kent Ballard learned how to be a man through, what he calls inverse intelligence, which is taking what you experience and then doing the opposite of that to make a new reality for yourself.

• He leaves us with 4 main takeaways: Everything starts within, acknowledge that your father may not have provided what you’ve longed for, you have more power than you think, and appreciate those who have walked with you

• Different types of Fathers; Disney, Hollow, Peekaboo, Hopscotch, and Angel dads.