Reading Zora's story nudged me toward the understanding that my most positive school experiences happened when I had teachers who understood my perception of myself and reflected it back to me in a positive way. I saw myself as intellectual and creative, and when I wasn't able to express that or didn't feel those traits were appreciated, I felt disconnected. Having to re-establish that identity in seventh grade when my family moved to a new state was a struggle, and it took a while to feel comfortable expressing myself in the classroom around a new group of people.

As an adult, I now realize how critical teachers are in modeling how students can show up as their authentic selves at the table of their learning.

By 5th grade, there was a sharp drop in self-esteem as puberty hit and everything felt uncertain. That season felt like I was “not at the table.” I was lost, annoyed, and confused. Things started stabilizing around 7th and 8th grade, and by 9th/10th through 12th, my parents were pushing for excellence, which I excelled in.

Leaving Botswana was my first leap, stepping away from my parents’ shadow to find my own voice. College was a rollercoaster, but I graduated, built my career, pursued grad school, and now I’m back for another master’s, another time I have felt most “at the table.”

Throughout elementary school I have nothing but positive memories. I grew up in a very small town where everyone knows everyone. My teachers knew me and my family. I always felt like they had my best interest at heart. They were generally warm and kind.

There were times where I was not always "at the table." Much of this happened in my teen and adult years. When I began 7th grade I started a school that was grades 7-12. It was overwhelming. I was very shy. Though my teachers still knew me and my family, I was in a shell. I would rather be in the background. This did vary year to year. I would generally get more comfortable as time went on.

In 10th grade I moved and started a new school. I did not know others. My teachers did not now me or my family. Again, I reverted back into a shell. My teachers were kind and helpful, but I was not at a comfort level to be connected with my educators and educational setting. This happened again when I went to college. I feel as though the older I got, the more I completed education because I felt like I "had to just get through." A lot of my disempowerment and disconnection has been a result of my own quiet personality and being overwhelmed by class size and/or unfamiliarity.

However, things definitely changed at the start of high school. My mom had lost her job and my sister and I both had to work to assist her in affording living expenses. At this point in my life, I no longer felt like a student. I felt a general disconnect from the classroom.

When I went to college, I certainly felt this disconnect widen. I was surrounded by peers who were a constant reminder of the class divide experienced at college. While I was working three jobs and attending university full-time, they had access to a parental spending fund where they could spend freely. As much as I would've loved college to have been my place of "belonging", I felt disconnected from my peers who received such financial and parental support.

By the 8th grade, though, I began to feel more like myself again and started to re-engage. In high school, there were moments of belonging and empowerment, especially during my freshman, sophomore and senior years, but my junior year stood out as a time when I felt silenced and weighed down by pressure. College at Howard was very different in those four years, I consistently felt at the table. I was respected, challenged, and supported in ways that helped me grow not only as a student but also as a leader. Now, in graduate school, I continue to feel at the table of my learning, seen both as a learner and as a professional.

The purpose of this activity is to help us reflect on our different experiences with school and see how they connect to the broader contexts of education. Revisiting the past can bring up a lot of emotions, some joyful, some painful but doing this work helps me see how my experiences have shaped who I am and who I want to be as an educator. Adding our charts to the Padlet allows us to create a collective gallery of our learning journeys, showing both the differences and the connections in our stories. For me, this reflection reinforces why it’s so important to make sure every student feels welcomed, respected, and valued that they always have a seat at the table of learning.