I believe I came through this developmental stage with the hope that Martorell describes. As far as I know, my needs as an infant were met and I received adequate affection. My crisis at this stage resolved to trust.

As far as I can tell, my second developmental stage resolved to autonomy. My parents and siblings gave no indication that I was crippled by shame or doubt, though I did respond when these emotions were used by authority figures to curb bad behavior. As Martorell (2023) notes, "Toddlers need adults to set appropriate limits, and shame and doubt help them recognize the need for those limits" (p. 156). This allows autonomy to grow to a reasonable degree while still promoting appropriate behavior and obedience, and I believe this was enacted in my home environment.

This is the stage where I have more concrete memories, and thus can more accurately assess my psychosocial progress. I resolved Erikson's third crisis with initiative. I remember being a generally happy child through 1st grade—I played well with others, had friends, and liked trying new things. Martorell (2023) states that "preschool children can do—and want to do—more and more. At the same time, they are learning that some of the things they want to do meet social approval, whereas others do not" (p. 210). I was perceptive and had a relatively clear understanding of what was considered good behavior. I generally met those standards and performed well as a student and as a son.

Martorell (2023) summarizes the danger of this stage as follows: "If children are unable to obtain the praise of others or lack motivation and self-esteem, they may develop a feeling of low self-worth and thus develop a sense of inferiority" (p. 275). Unfortunately, inferiority was the resolution of my fourth stage. In 3rd grade I began to detect the dysfunction in my household, where my father had frequent and explosive conflicts with my mother and siblings. A lack of explicit love and encouragement combined with harsh criticism, verbal abuse, and emotional neglect led to feelings of intense inferiority and low self-esteem.

My strongest sense of identity at this point was that I did not want to be like my father. But simply knowing what my identity wasn’t was not enough. Martorell (2023) defines identity as "a coherent conception of the self made up of goals, values, and beliefs to which the person is solidly committed" (p. 335); I did not possess this firm self-concept. I struggled with low self-confidence and confusion about my path in life. As such, I resolved this stage with identity confusion.

I was incredibly fortunate to meet Sarah, my wife, in college when we were both 19 years old. Finally living away from my family and experiencing love for the first time, I was able to get my life back on track thanks to Sarah. Without her, I likely would have come through young adulthood struggling psychologically. As Martorell (2023) notes, "previous data on social isolation indicate it is strongly associated with an increase in depression and anxiety in teens" (p. 311). Learning how to develop intimacy and devote myself to others allowed me to stave off my feelings of depression that had grown since middle childhood. Thankfully, I resolved this stage with intimacy.

I think of generativity as doing one's part to make the world a better place, and this is certainly a personal goal of mine. I have not yet reached middle adulthood, but I expect to resolve this stage with generativity. I have a loving family with my wife and daughter, and I am setting myself up for a meaningful career as an educator. I intend to deepen my commitment to helping and volunteering in my community to guide and aid those who need it. Martorell (2023) notes that "exposure to community violence and living in a dangerous community are strong predictors of future antisocial behavior" (p. 355), so community involvement is an important means of improving the lives of the next generation.

Matorell (2023) states that a poor outcome at this stage involves the adult's despair "over [their] inability to relive life" (p. 13). I do not expect this to happen in my case. I believe I will resolve with integrity. My role as a devoted husband, father (and potentially grandfather), teacher, and community mentor will provide the relationships and generative work that I need to accept old age and death with a sense of fulfillment.