To get past guilt, we need to sit with the following uncomfortable truth: We all have the capability to inflict harm. 

Even with the best intentions we can still commit harm. This is due to a variety of factors – childhood patterns, complex trauma (ie exposed to multiple forms of trauma long term), & by simply being human which involves making mistakes.  

This is incredibly important to acknowledge because healing from harm can never be given by someone else. This means that carrying guilt, shame or internalizing punishment while trying to be accountable neither absolves you of your harm nor heals the offended.