As I process my journey with DEI with our leadership time this year, I realize I can’t separate my recent learning, aha’s, and personal growth in application and action without considering how the new learning builds upon previous learning and experiences with cultural awareness, bias, race, diversity equity and integration- and how I may alter some previously held concepts. The only way I have really grown and moved on to a higher level of understanding and action has been to be willing to let go of deep misinformation, biases, and even negative experiences that were at times hurtful to me. The misinformation provided by our trusted community in addition to negative experiences support our fear and reluctance to engage with races and cultures that are different from us. The discomfort of the differences triggers in all of us the fight or flight syndrome, which often really just shows up as avoidance instead of flight and need to control instead of fight. Looking at my own struggle with these behaviors and my growth in understanding and changing my thinking and behavior, I see that this is what influenced my intention. Bias becomes deeply intertwined in our unconscious, and therefore impacts our unconscious intention. This is the root of microaggressions and other bias driven behavior. We can say we intend to be unbiased and proficient implementers of DEI. But as long as we haven’t yet fully been able to explore our history in light of all our past experiences and all the times we avoid or attempt to control, we only scratch the surface. We can change our conscious desire to change our intentions long before we can change our unconscious biases and unconscious intentions.

I so appreciate all of my life experiences with others who have stretched me, and for this DEI learning.

Cris Goldy