Wed May '25 - SWH Prac #3 - Which gentle drops could you share in these situations? by

"Are you ok? Is now an ok time to meet? I love how soothing you are being for your kotiro. Have you heard the whakatauki 'Te tangi tō te tamariki, he whakamā tō te pakeke'? It means the cry of the child is the shame of the adult. Our tūpuna believed we needed to always help our pepi and tamariki to stop crying."

ashleighberryman — 2025-09-16 20:39:42 UTC

"I like to use the word mischief instead of naughty when describing our tamariki. Mischief and curiosity are traits our tūpuna would admire and encourage for their own tamariki. Maui was a hero of our people - he was curious and mischievous. He was brave and cheeky. Our tūpuna expected this from their kids."

ashleighberryman — 2025-09-16 20:39:42 UTC

"Our tamariki love to play - did you know our tūpuna would organise games and activities for all the tamariki in the kāinga to entertain them, but also to teach them useful skills? Swimming, races, swings, as well as waiata, haka etc. Sometimes our kids just need some outside time running around and playing. Maybe a hour in the morning and an hour in the afternoon?"

ashleighberryman — 2025-09-16 20:39:42 UTC

"I’ve been doing these tūpuna parenting wānanga, is it ok if I share a bit of the kaupapa with you? Our tūpuna believed pepi were born tapu and born with mana. Do you know what tapu means?Did you know that you never lose your tapu? That you are born with it, and it is still a part of you now. You are tapu and have mana, and deserve to be protected. Everyone is your whānau does. Is there anything about your whānau you'd like to discuss?"

ashleighberryman — 2025-09-16 20:39:42 UTC

"Oh your wee potiki - that's so frustrating in the morning! Our potiki are wee rangatira in the making, all of them are. Did you know our tūpuna believed pepi were born tapu and born with mana? That mana meant that their needs were respected so if they're causing a fuss, they would help them find a solution. What does your potiki like to do? Is there an activity they can do so they're entertained while the big kids are getting ready? Cups and water in the sink, perhaps?"

ashleighberryman — 2025-09-16 20:39:42 UTC

"Our tamariki are all unique, with different strengths and qualities. For our whānau, its important to try and acknowledge the mana of everyone in the whānau - he mana tō tēna tō tēna. Finding ways to either activities or take turns between tamariki so everyone feels good about the work in mana enhancing. Perhaps one boy decorates half the tree and other decorates the other half?"

ashleighberryman — 2025-09-16 20:39:42 UTC

"Tūpuna tāne were nurturing and carer pāpā for their whānāu - early explorers noticed how they were more often seen caring their pepi in a carrier, te pīkau, than māmā, and that they were 'excellent nurses', cleaning, cuddling and singing lullabies for their pepi. The colonial parenting ways introduced the idea of 'woman's work' and that children were to be seen and not heard. That was not our way before."

ashleighberryman — 2025-09-16 20:39:42 UTC

2025-09-16 22:38:20 UTC

close the door and walk away - deal with it later

2025-09-16 22:39:10 UTC

communicating back to tamaiti to figure out why this has happened. Seeking solutions together through intention

2025-09-16 22:40:08 UTC

askolder child to help you clean it up and while cleaning up, talk about milk not going into vege draw. Ngākau tika to redirect into the right way to do things in the kainga

2025-09-16 22:40:43 UTC

reframe from naughty into big Maui energy.

2025-09-16 22:41:13 UTC

Reframing 'naughty' to a tamaiti. just expressing themselves and learning

2025-09-16 22:42:36 UTC

Good idea to talk with whānau about what child finds calming to find aio or regulation for them. Strengths based. Routines for re-grounding

2025-09-16 22:43:14 UTC

Relate tamaiti to the taiao - refer to Tanemahuta or ngahere. If down on papa wriggling around we can look at Ngangara to refer to. Holistic perspective.

2025-09-16 22:44:19 UTC

Good to go back to tūpuna and how they accepted mistakes and behaviour from pēpi. They never smacked, always listened - take on those whakaaro

2025-09-16 22:45:56 UTC

how to we interact with our tamariki? are we speaking to them how we speak to our brothers or are we speaking to them to create a different narrative for our mokopuna?

2025-09-16 22:47:18 UTC

Sharing practical examples on how pāpā can spend time with. kids. Talking about different ages and stages and looking at interest of tamariki. Knowing how to engage.

2025-09-16 22:48:39 UTC

Ask different questions to wānanga with pāpā - how do we want to be raising tamariki in our kainga?

2025-09-16 22:51:36 UTC

Setting your kaupapa around doing the xmas tree. each takes a turn so fighting doesn't happen. Pick decorations you each would like, then swap and give one to each other - building a whānau kaupapa