Thoughts, Feelings, Beliefs by Kaleah Leeder

Identify a (TBF) thought, feeling, or belief that holds you back from embracing opportunities, feeling confident in your ability to pursue goals, or feeling joy on a daily basis. What is that negative language/thought that limits you?

kleeder2 — 2024-07-22 15:27:18 UTC

I often think I am either too much or not enough for others. That leads to isolating myself from my friends and family to, in a way, remove the burden of my presence from my loved ones' lives.

How did you develop this TBF? Did you develop this specific TFB after a negative life experience or negative message growing up? Did it come from a hard time in your life where you felt lost, discouraged, or misunderstood?

kleeder2 — 2024-07-22 15:28:46 UTC

My worry about burdening others stemmed from an experience where I did ask for help but was turned away or not given proper, enthusiastic help. There have been times throughout my life when that thought was reinforced by other negative experiences with people I trusted and depended on switched up and treated me like an acquaintance and not a close friend.

Have you tried to change this TBF in the past? What is it that prevented you from making the change? If not, do you want to change it now?

kleeder2 — 2024-07-22 15:29:21 UTC

I have tried to alter this way of thinking in the past. I recognized it was not a healthy mindset and would only hurt rather than help me. I tried being more direct and upfront with my needs and wants, but, ultimately, I was wracked with the same insecure approach to life and would weasel out. I'm still trying to do better and approach difficult things in life with determination and decisiveness.

How will changing this TBF benefit your future self?

kleeder2 — 2024-07-22 15:29:40 UTC

Changing from an insecure mindset to one of confidence will allow me to be more comfortable with being a little selfish. Taking that initiative and being my own biggest advocate will only help me. I won't be able to help myself build my future if I'm not able to ask simple questions or even make conversation with strangers. I hope that this change will come without me having to say that I'm changing-people will just notice that shift.

Change is a process and you may experience a setback. What can you do to pivot and be more successful when you re-group to overcome a setback? Think of things like resources you can use, changes in your routine, people who support you, etc..

kleeder2 — 2024-07-22 15:30:38 UTC

Find comfort in being uncomfortable. Learning to be ok with stepping outside of my comfort zone will help me with even starting to ask questions for myself. Holding myself accountable is a huge thing that helps me stay on track. I ask myself if what I am doing right now will help me achieve my dream.