No one to care for me,

No one to love me, 

Only a complacent lonely child. 

I never got to experience the tactile feeling of your parents hands

I had….. No one 

and I am now 13 

And have very pensive thoughts 

I know my parents are narcissists

But I was far from it.

They would Berate me.

I was scarred from this 

Now i am an Adult 

I shouldn't forget, 

I don't deserve to forget

This left me without aplomb

I wish i wish,

I wasn't so angst 

Because now as i sit alone in this desolate place 

I hinder to forget

Into winter's quiet grey,
There's still that low abjectness
I wish would go away

I should never forget
The woe I went through

I watched the ashen pieces 
Of my life blow away

I was wounded, disheveled

My life is ebbing low

I could not awaken from my wistful disposition

The asinine mystery binded me 

I could not see

The scenic view in front of me

My prominent passions 

from a common spring

Caused havoc

Losing every thing I ever had

As it pass’d me flying by

Now that spring has come

I want to try again

I want to learn to breathe fresh air

Learn to walk without having feet

But doing so

Incarcerated me into hard times

                       

My heart was substantially sore

Hard time was the blame

But resilience is key

I’ll softly let the balmy sunshine

Dance around its dreams

It meant I loved

But the transgression made it so

Not a vestige of love was felt for me

In parting from it now 

Yet if hope has flown away in a night or in a day 

And having perhaps the better claim 

Conscientiously Trying to not stray from my path 

Yet knowing how way leads onto way

I was set adrift onto a new path 

And sorry I could not travel both

Yet I doubted if I should ever go back

Is it there for the less gone 

Trying to forget the long saga of pain in my past 

is the difference between imagination and escape

realizing the exquisite Opportunities of life 

still profounds me 

Always abmerable to everyone

Just once I want to do something for myself

then I here a reverberating sound as I spot the hills 

as if they called out to me 

The lithe flowers in the forest 

are beautiful to me as a   

All I reveal is a single memory 

In a vision,or in none

The appraisal of life is something 

no one can determine no matter how  adroit they are

I now understand why people pay
homage to life

I was a child, she was a child

But we loved  with a fanatical love

that was more than any love we could ever recieve

We could afford to be affluent with our love

It felt like I fell out of a tree 

An inert feeling 

I never wanted to stop feeling

Life was finally getting good.

Once upon a midnight dream

I pictured us driving in an immaculate, ebony

Mercedes C class drop-top 

on a weekend vacation to the beach

I was always inept when it came to her athleticism

I always forgot the name of it

She always runs to clear her mind

I always looked at her like a nincompoop when she ran

I was always aghast when it came to her

When she would ask me to run with her,

I would say no. 

She would say I was lazy

But I loved it when she called me lazy.

It was in some way audibly pleasing.

It made me feel like someone was actually paying attention,

To me, and only me.

I needed her,

And she needed me

Forever and Always 

No one to care for me,

No one to love me, 

Only a complacent lonely child. 

I never got to experience the tactile feeling of your parents hands

I had….. No one 

I am now  13 

And have very pensive thoughts 

I know my parents are narcissists

But I was far from it.

They would Berate me.

I was scarred from this 

Now I am an Adult 

I shouldn't forget, 

I don't deserve to forget

This left me without aplomb

I wish I wish,

I wasn't so angst 

Because now as I sit alone in this desolate place 

I hinder to forget

Into winter's quiet grey,
There's still that low abjectness
I wish would go away 

Vocab Used: Tactile, Angst, Desolate, Pensive, Hinder, Aplomb, Berate, Complacency, Abject, Narcissist.

Poems Used:  Autumn By Helen Marion Burnside, Remember By Christina Rossetti, Heritage By Claude Mckay, Sad Wine (II) by Cesar Pavere (new).

My life is ebbing low

I could not awaken from my wistful disposition

The asinine mystery binded me 

I could not see

The scenic view in front of me

My prominent passions 

from a common spring

Caused havoc

Losing every thing I ever had

As it pass’d me flying by

Now that spring has come

I want to try again

I want to learn to breathe fresh air

Learn to walk without having feet

But doing so

Incarcerated me into hard times

                       

My heart was substantially sore

Hard time was the blame

But resilience is key

I’ll softly let the balmy sunshine

Dance around its dreams

It meant I loved

Poems Used:
Alone - Edgar Allen Poe
First Memory - Louise Glück
Hard-time Blues - William Waring Cuney (new)
Let the Light Enter - Frances Ellen Watkins Harper
The Rose that Grew from Concrete - Tupac Shakur

Vocab Used: asinine, disheveled, disposition, havoc,
incarcerate, prominent, resilience, scenic, substantial 
wistful

In parting from it now 

Yet if hope has flown away in a night or in a day 

And having perhaps the better claim 

Conscientiously Trying to not stray from my path 

Yet knowing how way leads onto way

I was set adrift onto a new path 

And sorry I could not travel both

Yet I doubted if I should ever go back

Is it there for the less gone 

Trying to forget the long saga of pain in my past 

is the difference between imagination and escape

realizing the exquisite Opportunities of life 

still profounds me 

Always abmerable to everyone

Just once I want to do something for myself

then I here a reverberating sound as I spot the hills 

as if they called out to me 

The lithe flowers in the forest 

are beautiful to me as a   

All I reveal is a single memory 

In a vision,or in none

The appraisal of life is something 

no one can determine no matter how  adroit they are 

Poems Used: 
A Dream Within a Dream - Edgar Allen Poe
Kinship - Margarita Engle
Theme in Yellow - Carl Sandburg
The Road Not Taken - Robert Frost

Vocab Used: adroit, amenable, Appraisal, conscientious, exquisite, lithe, profound, reverberate, saga, vestige

But we loved  with a fanatical love

that was more than any love we could ever recieve

We could afford to be affluent with our love

It felt like I fell out of a tree 

An inert feeling 

I never wanted to stop feeling

Life was finally getting good.

Once upon a midnight dream

I pictured us driving in an immaculate, ebony

Mercedes C class drop-top 

on a weekend vacation to the beach

I was always inept when it came to her athleticism

I always forgot the name of it

She always runs to clear her mind

I always looked at her like a nincompoop when she ran

I was always aghast when it came to her

When she would ask me to run with her,

I would say no. 

I was lazy

But I loved it when she called me lazy.

It was in some way audibly pleasing.

It made me feel like someone was actually paying attention,

To me, and only me.

I needed her,

And she needed me

Forever and Always 

Poems Used: The Raven by Edgar Allen Poe, To This Day by Shane Koyczan, Anabelle Lee by Edgar Allen Poe, Happy Hour (new)

Vocab Used: Affluent, Inept, Aghast, Fanatical, nincompoop, Inert, Immaculate, Contentious, Audibly, ebony