EDR Revision Strategies/Lane Chapters 2 & 3 by mary shelton

EDR Revision Strategies/Lane Chapters 2 & 3 by mary shelton https://padlet.com/marymccarthyshelton/ohoee43rzit4 Write a summary of one revision strategy that you would like to use with your students, or try out in your own writing. en-us 2017-09-25 15:20:49 UTC 2026-03-17 12:46:47 UTC hello@padlet.com Chapter 2: Digging for Details https://padlet.com/marymccarthyshelton/ohoee43rzit4/wish/192821565 Post by Tracy Garcia
I thoroughly enjoyed reading through all of the strategies in these two chapters. I found several that I can definitely see myself using in my classroom in the future.
I would like to summarize the first strategy that Lane talks about in Chapter 2, Digging for Details. I think this is a great way to introduce specific details to your class and to get your students thinking about digging deeper into their writing.
The first step in this strategy is to find an unusual piece of clothing, or a strange accessory, to show your students (Lane uses a hat). Their job is to make this item "come alive" by describing it. They should use their five senses to help them think of description words.
After writing these words on the board, the next step is to encourage your students to dig deeper and to look for more specific details. Ask how or why questions to guide them. For example, HOW does it smell? WHY does it look weird?
Write a descriptive sentence or two using the best details that the students came up with, exemplifying the difference between the first set of details and the second. Students will usually see the big difference and realize they enjoyed coming up with the more specific details as opposed to the more basic details.]]> 2017-10-01 23:30:43 UTC https://padlet.com/marymccarthyshelton/ohoee43rzit4/wish/192821565 Building Character hostj https://padlet.com/marymccarthyshelton/ohoee43rzit4/wish/193597765 We are piloting a new reading workshop this year by Lucy Calkins and it focuses heavily on teacher and students re reading old familiar storybooks. As we all know one of the attributes of any good story book are their strong characters. For this reason I really like Barry Lane's strategy called Building Character. It just fits so well!
The gist of the strategy is that students will create a character, and not just simply create a character but go into detail describing things like what they look like, how they act, where they live, who in their family, etc. It is important that the students also give their character a problem. Then the students get up and describe their character for the class and their characters problem, in turn the class writes down questions or what if statements that they think of for this character. The writers are encouraged to use these questions and what if statements from their classmates to create a story for their character that starts with the problem they described. The writers are asked to break their thinking/writing up into three different acts.
Act One is when the character discovers the problem or the trouble. For example; Millie lost her tooth on the playground at recess and now she is so upset the tooth fairy won't be able to find it. The Second Act is when the character faces additional problems. So if we are referring to Millie perhaps she writes a note to the tooth fairy explaining the missing tooth and her dog chews it up. The last Act, Act Three is when the character solves the problem and the issue is resolved. This strategy is so much fun and what a great way to get peers involved in the writing process. I really think later in the year I could do a version of this with my Kindergarten class and they would love it.

]]> 2017-10-03 18:36:40 UTC https://padlet.com/marymccarthyshelton/ohoee43rzit4/wish/193597765 The Magic Camera https://padlet.com/marymccarthyshelton/ohoee43rzit4/wish/193618922 Lisa Mulder

Barry Lane’s 3rd chapter focuses on revising, specifically adding different types of detail into writing. One strategy he uses is is the Magic Camera, aimed at helping writers develop the skill of seeing the world in great physical detail, and transferring that detail into writing. To introduce the strategy, Lane describes the magic camera as one that can point at the world to make snapshots that can hear, smell, show colors, and light. Next, Lane uses mentor texts with vivid details, such as Laura Ingalls Wilder’s Little House on the Prairie to illustrate how authors can describe in great detail something seemingly ordinary. After briefly reviewing what students can do when they’ve stalled out, Lane asks them to imagine a person they know well and to put that person in the middle of an empty page. Next, students imagine moments in time since they have known him/her and to brainstorm five or six moments. Students will then narrow it down to one moment and create a snapshot of that moment, adding great detail, such as “Dad knelt beside me by the ice hole, his hand in the icy water reaching for the perch that slipped back in.” Give students about twenty minutes to write their snapshot, and when they think they’ve finished, they will ask themselves two questions that will help them add more detail. After this time, they can share with a partner or group, adding detail from the group’s feedback. Lastly, students can draw a picture of their snapshot, making sure to include the detail from the written snapshot.

]]> 2017-10-03 19:22:17 UTC https://padlet.com/marymccarthyshelton/ohoee43rzit4/wish/193618922 Chapter 3: Snapshots/Magic Camera annie_hammill https://padlet.com/marymccarthyshelton/ohoee43rzit4/wish/193649281 Post By: Annie Hammill
Snapshots is something that I love using with my 3rd graders! I started using it when our academic coach, Tim Hargis, wrote a book called the Writing Diner, which introduced different ways to get writers to provide more details and improve their writing.
In order to use snapshots, the teacher will need to model using a story of their own or a different story that uses incredible detail to describe a scene. The point of this is that when your reader is reading the story they can have a picture in their mind of what it should look like and what is going on in the setting. Then the teacher can model how to take a sentence from their writing and creating a better snapshot by adding details of what it looks like and what is going on in the scene.
In order for them to practice the snapshot strategy you can have students think of any person that they know really well and then put them on a blank page and freeze them in five to six different moments using webs. Students will then need to narrow it down to one moment and describe it with many details. They will be given at least 20 minutes depending on how long they will need. They will then read their snapshot over and ask themselves two questions that will add more detail and go back to revise. After revising, students will then share with a partner or small group and the notes and questions they will receive they will take and go back to revise their snapshot again. The final step is to have the students draw a picture of their snapshot. After drawing a picture, they will add one to two more details to their writing. ]]> 2017-10-03 20:49:00 UTC https://padlet.com/marymccarthyshelton/ohoee43rzit4/wish/193649281 Chapter 2: Using Details to Show Emotion brownju2 https://padlet.com/marymccarthyshelton/ohoee43rzit4/wish/193695588 Julia Brown

After reading through these chapters, I took away so many great new strategies I am eager to use. They made me feel excited to write and revise because of their creative and untraditional nature. One strategy in particular I especially liked was using details to show emotion, found in chapter 2. I remember an English class in high school in which my teacher would not allow us to use the word "show." In fact, we would get points off for using this word in any essay or even informal writing. My teacher would simply say, don't say show, actually show me with your description. This seemed to be a struggle at first, however, once I learned how to show meaning, it was a fun challenge. This strategy calls writers to do some of the same things. Using poems or excerpts from books that show something without telling the reader exactly what is intended is the first step of this strategy. Next, you ask students to make a list of things they like to watch or observe. After they have created a list, it is important to have have students select one of these ideas to write more about. They will then model the example poem by Ted Kooser, or any other excerpt or poem found that shows what a poem is about without directly telling or using the emotional connection word. After the poem has been written, students should identify what it is their poem is about. This could even be a guessing game, in which students read their poems aloud if they feel comfortable and their classmates guess the emotion they are trying to convey!]]> 2017-10-04 03:01:01 UTC https://padlet.com/marymccarthyshelton/ohoee43rzit4/wish/193695588 Building Character grantj6 https://padlet.com/marymccarthyshelton/ohoee43rzit4/wish/194932264 Jamie Grant

Next week my first and second grade students will be writing a narrative in the genre of their choosing. We begin by creating a character for their story. This is why I was so excited to read the strategy, Building Character.
This strategy allows students to dig deeper into their character and in essence, put themselves in their shoes. They are asked to create a list of details describing the character and a problem they might may be faced with. The writer will then have to stand in front of the class and act as though they, themselves, were the character they created, and present to the class the problem the character is faced with. Students will ask questions that the writer will have to answer in the mindset of the character. We push student thinking by asking them ‘what if’ scenarios so that the writer will be forced to rethink and revise the character in that moment. They will then head back to their seat to write down all they have ‘learned’ about their character.

In order to scaffold the writing process a bit more for students, we then ask them to think of the character in three ‘acts’. Act one is getting the reader acquainted with the character and their troubles. Act two is when the problem arises! Act three is when the character will come across the final obstacle that will lead to the solution.

I am so excited to teach this next week!

]]> 2017-10-07 18:20:51 UTC https://padlet.com/marymccarthyshelton/ohoee43rzit4/wish/194932264 Chapter 3: Creating Memes https://padlet.com/marymccarthyshelton/ohoee43rzit4/wish/194939258 Chapter 3: Creating Memes—I’ve Learned That Sometimes…

By Tya Ronk

In this strategy, we delve into the power of interpretation through photos and truism or precepts.

The first step is to show students quotes by famous people that impart wisdom (precepts, truths, or truisms). Then post a picture (the chapter used a picture of a couch in a field to illustrate truism) and put the words I’ve learned that sometimes… on the board and ask the students to complete the sentence to describe the photograph. Next, after waiting long enough to give students a chance to think and to realize that there are many right answers and no wrong answers. This will build a culture of questioning and such and will take time. While doing this, make sure that you are also giving your students time to craft their responses and then find ways to celebrate their responses. The example given is to post the picture on the board and put the students’ precepts in thought bubbles around the photo. Finally, you would be sure to model this many times until students are comfortable and proficient at believing in their own interpretations. Then you can have students choose one truth and free write about it with emphasis on them finding examples from their own lives, history, literature, or movies.

I really like the emphasis on there being no wrong answer to this strategy. This strategy can be used with either a quote or picture as a baseboard to jump from. It really allows for the creativity of each student to shine.

]]> 2017-10-07 20:03:48 UTC https://padlet.com/marymccarthyshelton/ohoee43rzit4/wish/194939258 Building Character https://padlet.com/marymccarthyshelton/ohoee43rzit4/wish/194946933 Sonja Engelsma
After reading through the various strategies in these two chapters, it was difficult to choose one. I think the one strategy that would be most beneficial for my group of students would be the one on Building Character. This strategy requires students to really delve deep into their character. So many of my students struggle with developing their stories. If they knew their character well, it would be so much easier for them to develop a story around that character.
When students use this strategy, they first have to create a list of ten details that describe the character they want to create. They then give their character a problem. After this they have to stand up in front of class and become the character themselves. While in front of the class, the students have to tell the class about the problem and then take questions. All the questions about the character should be written down. What if questions are an important aspect of this because they help increase what is under discussion. When the questions have been answered, the student is encouraged to sit down and write a story with their character in it. The story that is written needs to have three acts: act one is the setup, act two is the mix-up, and act three is the end-up.
I am looking forward to using this in my classroom next week during our writing period. ]]> 2017-10-07 22:50:31 UTC https://padlet.com/marymccarthyshelton/ohoee43rzit4/wish/194946933 Chapter 2: Digging for Details https://padlet.com/marymccarthyshelton/ohoee43rzit4/wish/194955082 Jessica Pleak

I chose a Room with a View because I am working with my Chinese students on how to gain a stronger vocabulary. This section talks about having students close their eyes, and picture a room. Then, open their eyes, and add all the details you can think of. I love that when students get stuck, the author suggests that they push themselves to turn the knob on the binoculars to hone in on the clearer picture. I think this is a great way to explain finding details. I used to tell my kids that movies are great because we get to sit back and not work for the details. The problem with films is that they don't allow imagination, because it's already done for you. Books allow you to add in missing details by picturing the text in your mind. I am working with my students to add details into their writing with their Pen Pals because most of them know all the same words in English, so their writing sounds the same. I just asked the school to purchase dictionaries for all the students, to help them find similar words. Sadly, no one knows what a Thesaurus is, so I'm still working on that one...

]]> 2017-10-08 03:02:35 UTC https://padlet.com/marymccarthyshelton/ohoee43rzit4/wish/194955082 Chapter 3: The Magic Camera https://padlet.com/marymccarthyshelton/ohoee43rzit4/wish/195007957 Katelyn Byker

In my experiences teaching writing, many students do not appreciate the revision process. They don't want to make any changes to their writing. I love how Lane's strategies engage students in a creative way. The Magic Camera strategy encourages students to zoom in on a moment or character and depict the 5 senses in their writing. There are so many best practices in this one strategy alone. It encourages the use of asking questions to help writers be more specific, and utilizes mentor texts to model specific moments where the author is using the magic camera technique.

Students brainstorm 5-6 moments and zoom in or "freeze the camera," writing a snapshot of that one moment. After drafting, students read what they've written and pause to ask themselves at least 2 questions that will lead to more detail. Then they share their writing with a partner, sharing more wonderings to enhance the first draft. Students then draw a picture of their snapshot, making sure to include all of the details in their writing in the picture. ]]> 2017-10-08 15:28:13 UTC https://padlet.com/marymccarthyshelton/ohoee43rzit4/wish/195007957 Chapter 2 Digging for Details and Chapter 3 Stats to Snaps watsonam1 https://padlet.com/marymccarthyshelton/ohoee43rzit4/wish/195040509 Amanda Watson
I could not decide which of these strategies I like more. Chapter 2 digging for details is all about digging deeper to describe an object. The author takes a smelly old hat and has the students describe it in greater detail. They use their senses to do this description. We are actually working on adjectives in my class this week and I think this strategy will be perfect for students to describe different objects. I think I will do this with a stuffed animal. I want the students to write a sentence or two describing the animal. The next day I will read the sentences and ask if we can add more detail to tell about the stuffed animals. For instance, the animal is wearing a Hawaiian shirt so maybe the students will describe the animals, what it's wearing and maybe come up with why.

Chapter 3 Stats to Snaps
I think this would be great for getting students just to think about details of their pictures to illustrate the stat. For instance, the fact that sharks can grow 30,000 teeth in a lifetime would be a very interesting image. This will be a great strategy when we get to informational writing later in the year.]]> 2017-10-08 20:08:06 UTC https://padlet.com/marymccarthyshelton/ohoee43rzit4/wish/195040509 Revisions Strategies--Lane Chapters 2&3 https://padlet.com/marymccarthyshelton/ohoee43rzit4/wish/195055595 Debra Rajaratne

Chapter 2--Digging for Details

In Chapter 2, I really related and felt I could use the revision strategies of "Digging for Details." Lane talks about giving the students an "old hat" and having them describe it. The students go from describing it as weird, but eventually get to also using their 5 sense to describe this object.
I feel I could use this technique for for when I would have the students describe themselves as a worker or to describe the steps in a process that they go through when learning a skill. My students always find it hard to describe themselves (especially in job interviews), so maybe I would have them close their eyes and describe what they look like as they are performing that one skill in class. I always wish I could do more creative writing pieces in my class, but the writing done at our school is more practical in nature.

Chapter 3--The Magic Camera

In this revision/writing strategy, the teacher says the students have a magic camera that will take snapshots of moments in their lives. I especially liked the exercise where Lane asks the students to picture someone that they know well and to describe them through 5-6 moments, eventually pick 1, and write about that snapshot moment as best as they can. They will then try to ask themselves 2 questions based on what they wrote to see if they need more detail. They then have someone else read their writing, answer questions from the audience that arise from listening to this snapshot moment, and from this, add more detail to their writing from the questions that arose.
I was thinking I could use this writing strategy for when I have my students write practice writing a second thank you letter to an important adult in their life instead of someone who interviewed them. They like the idea of writing a thank you to someone who has made a difference in their lives but sometimes find it hard to think about moments or things that this person has done that has impacted their life. I could use this as both a pre-writing and a revision strategy. ]]> 2017-10-08 22:54:11 UTC https://padlet.com/marymccarthyshelton/ohoee43rzit4/wish/195055595 Chapter 2: Building Character drice5 https://padlet.com/marymccarthyshelton/ohoee43rzit4/wish/195059843 Darreth Rice

I don't have my own classroom anymore, so I looked at this for more of myself as a writer. I always love creating stories, but I feel like the characters are always so one-dimensional and boring. I really like Lane's idea of building character by listing traits and then becoming the character. I love the idea that the students have to get up and introduce themselves to the class as the character. I think this really helps students (and it would help me as a writer) truly make my characters less static and more real-life. Reading great ideas like these makes me a little sad that I don't have a classroom to try it out with anymore. ]]> 2017-10-08 23:45:58 UTC https://padlet.com/marymccarthyshelton/ohoee43rzit4/wish/195059843 Chapter 2: A Room with a View yondoa https://padlet.com/marymccarthyshelton/ohoee43rzit4/wish/195063743 Ashley Mosley
I really enjoyed these 2 chapters, because I don't currently teach writing, but that could always change and so I think these strategies could be very useful.

I kept in mind teaching, but also using them for myself. I picked the strategy, A Room with A View, because it reminded me of the strategy Mary did with looking in a window or looking out a window. Without much thinking, I thought of a place that meant so much to me and I was able to write so much about it, because of the memories and connection.

This strategy is very similar because it asks students to close their eyes and think of a room they know well. They are to think of the details including, smell, look, sounds etc... When they open their eyes, they have to write down 5 quick details. I LOVE that they have to share with a partner and asking each question. This just expands their thinking and brings in more details- maybe they didn't think of or include originally. It mentions to have them free write, if want, and I think that would be a great idea. They can never free write enough. Plus if the details and memories are still fresh, they might be able to write more and more details.

I will also try this for one of my own writings. ]]> 2017-10-09 00:32:23 UTC https://padlet.com/marymccarthyshelton/ohoee43rzit4/wish/195063743 Chapter 2: Building Character https://padlet.com/marymccarthyshelton/ohoee43rzit4/wish/195074221 Megan Westlund
I just introduced personal narratives to my fourth graders and we will be beginning them very soon. I am really excited to use this strategy with my students to help them develop their characters and make their narratives come alive! I have found in the past that my students don't develop their characters enough when writing narratives so I think this strategy will be perfect! I will begin by having my students list 10 details about their character (after they decide what they are going to write about) and have the students create a problem for the character. I love the idea of having students pretend to be the character and tell a small group the problem their character has and take questions from peers. Then I will have the students create 3 acts for their character. I think this strategy will work great and I'm excited to see how more developed their characters are for their pieces!]]> 2017-10-09 02:01:00 UTC https://padlet.com/marymccarthyshelton/ohoee43rzit4/wish/195074221 Chapter 3: Using Living Statues and Tablets to "Show" Show Don't Tell https://padlet.com/marymccarthyshelton/ohoee43rzit4/wish/195080379 Post By: Gayle Lotterman

Although both of these chapters gave valuable insight into writing strategies, I chose this one because I love how it involves more than just brainstorming and writing. To summarize: 2 students stand in front of the class and act out an emotion. The rest of the class tries to guess what they are acting out, while the teacher (and/or students) videos the acting. Next, teacher and students discuss the difference between showing and telling. We can write, “He was sad”, or we can describe how his face crumpled and tears began rolling down his cheeks. Now the reader must decide for himself how the character is feeling. Next, teacher and students look again at the video, and together write a description of the emotion the students had acted out. They would make sure to describe using facial expression, body movements, etc., but leave out the emotion word. I loved this exercise because it is a very concrete way to show young students that readers can understand something without being directly told it. I can see myself using this in my classroom regularly, since I think it will greatly help to have a visual for students as well. ]]> 2017-10-09 02:52:23 UTC https://padlet.com/marymccarthyshelton/ohoee43rzit4/wish/195080379 Writing Strategy: Digging for Details (The Hat Trick) beamette https://padlet.com/marymccarthyshelton/ohoee43rzit4/wish/195334153 Stephanie Beam
These chapters are chock-full of really cool ideas to get students more engaged in developing their writing. What all of these workshop ideas have in common is that they help students pay closer attention to the world, to take the time to observe it in meaningful detail. If we want students to be better writers, we need to help them be better observers.

Also, when it comes to revising, it’s important to help students make the shift away from looking at what’s on the page, to assessing what isn’t yet on the page (33). Revising isn’t recopying (which is often the reality in schools), it’s about pushing ideas further, clarifying them, making them come alive.

Of all the strategies my favourite is the “Hat Trick” activity to help students understand the importance of digging for details. I particularly found the activity helpful and straightforward. In helping students understand that revising is not recopying, this activity can really help students see revision as an opportunity to dig for more compelling imagery. By using some kind of object (in this case a funny-looking hat) students go through steps of fleshing out funny analogies and descriptions about the hat that go beyond simply saying, “weird” or “fluffy.” I could sense that students enjoyed the process of moving through this process.

Reading both chapters made me reflect on how good writing takes time and focus, and yet we are so limited in the time that we have with students. Learning takes time, especially when learning isn’t reduced to a technique, and often assessment takes over much of the learning that should be going on. I feel that often students just learn how to be better test-takers. My biggest frustration as a teacher is wanting to go in depth but also having a breadth of information to cover. I guess it’s a question of deciding which aspects of writing students need help with the most and just focusing on those. Many of my previous students could have benefitted from taking more time to flesh out ideas/descriptions.

On a more personal note, I’m not writer who writes bony drafts; mine are always bursting at the seams with wordy descriptions and distracting details. When I revise, I feel like a weed whacker in a cornfield. lol

]]> 2017-10-09 18:00:03 UTC https://padlet.com/marymccarthyshelton/ohoee43rzit4/wish/195334153 Chapter2 - Writing Strategy: Digging for Details willikio https://padlet.com/marymccarthyshelton/ohoee43rzit4/wish/197181413 Post By: Kionna Williams
I really found chapter 2 relevant to what we are working on in class this trimester. Students are learning new styles of writing. When asked to verbally explain their positions I get rather detailed explanations. However, when asked to write, my students have a hard time expressing detail.

The writing strategy "Digging for Detail," is a strategy that I believe would loosen my students up so to speak. They need to get used to the idea that it is acceptable to write more than what they think they need to write. This strategy will teach students to add interesting detail to their writing.

Revising is another area where we are working to improve. Students thought that revising meant looking for mistakes. Now, they know that revising means looking for information. This issue that I am still having, is getting them to add more necessary details to their writing during the revising process. I believe that a number a few of the strategies presented in chapter 2 would be beneficial in helping my students to improve in the revising area of the writing process. ]]> 2017-10-16 00:14:59 UTC https://padlet.com/marymccarthyshelton/ohoee43rzit4/wish/197181413 Chapter 3: Stats to Snaps https://padlet.com/marymccarthyshelton/ohoee43rzit4/wish/204531955 Torie Anderson
I chose Stats to Snaps because as an 11th grade ELA Teacher a huge chunk of my school year is spent preparing my students for the SAT. The majority of the reading passages of the SAT consist of Informational Texts. The Stats to Snaps strategy gives students the chance to illustrate the "facts" from the Informational Text into a "snap" or image.
I believe that this strategy with give students the opportunity to interact with the text on a different level. I enjoy doodling on the side of my notes and so I consider this "doodling with purpose". Their image/snap would summarize/represent important information that they've read. Instead of using words to summarize they are using their own drawings or images they find.

]]> 2017-11-07 19:00:19 UTC https://padlet.com/marymccarthyshelton/ohoee43rzit4/wish/204531955