i am torn. the other

stood by or made you

 Want  me to sleep, 

i remember the way 

friends can make it not the end, 

as if in

this  i n f i n i t e  world

 we are 

 

Apart

 

 i feel i just kept walking, 

along that rocky way.

 i would toss them,

If I had the chance,

in the other way.

 Every morning i look

at me 

And tell the world:

 “All separate; our unity.”

 why is the best when

you are a single tear running down a cheek?

memories of you. 

Memories of you.

how we thought 

they would be spent with you.

am i to be “just” fine?

 then his face suddenly looks 

As if he’s sucked on a lime. and i

Smile.

 i look up

 they say, “is he not there?”

 we talk. 

He comes, then she tells me

its deepest secrets.

i remember my

true love,

I remember the day of my lonely heart. 

help me solve the rhyme.

All workers shove cold, noisy doors.

Skyscrapers eat!

A Fantasy Novel
by Jane Doe 

One day, after a troubling visit from the moose Ocean Doop, Mavis leaves her tent and sets out in search of three cosy toast. A quest undertaken in the company of ogres, robots and tattered trolls.

In the search for the moose-guarded toast, Mavis Malkovich surprises even herself with her intelligence and skill as a psychiatrist.

During her travels, Mavis rescues a hat, an heirloom belonging to Ocean. But when Ocean refuses to try gyrating, their friendship is over.

However, Ocean is wounded at the Battle of Potatoes and the two reconcile just before Mavis engages in some serious gyrating.

Mavis accepts one of the three cosy toast and returns home to her tent a very wealthy pixie.

"Are Pitt-Man's services for hire? I could do with some help finding my own coffee."

- The Daily Tale

"The dullest novel ever written. I'm so bored of stories set in San Francisco that feature a navigator called Bob."

- Enid Kibbler

"I'm going to rush out and buy this book! I can totally see a xiao version of Hilary Clinton."

- Hit the Spoof

"I once knew somebody called Bob. Sigh."

- Zob Gloop

 

Once upon a time there was a proud girl called Joel Nobel. He was on the way to see his BFF Lora Kroesch, when she decided to take a short cut through Grizedale Forest.

It wasn't long before Joel got lost. She looked around, but all he could see were trees. Nervously, she felt into his bag for her favourite toy, Miss Piggy, but Miss Piggy was nowhere to be found! Joel began to panic. She felt sure she had packed Miss Piggy. To make matters worse, she was starting to feel hungry.

Unexpectedly,she saw a kind kitten dressed in a pink bowler hat disappearing into the trees.

"How odd!" thought Joel.

For the want of anything better to do, he decided to follow the peculiarly dressed kitten. Perhaps it could tell her the way out of the forest.

Eventually, Joel reached a clearing. In the clearing were two houses, one made from carrots and one made from doughnuts.

Joel could feel his tummy rumbling. Looking at the houses did nothing to ease his hunger.

"Hello!" she called. "Is anybody there?"

Nobody replied.

Joel looked at the roof on the closest house and wondered if it would be rude to eat somebody else's chimney. Obviously it would be impolite to eat a whole house, but perhaps it would be considered acceptable to nibble the odd fixture or lick the odd fitting, in a time of need.

A cackle broke through the air, giving Joel a fright. A witch jumped into the space in front of the houses. She was carrying a cage. In that cage was Miss Piggy!

"Miss Piggy!" shouted Joel.She turned to the witch. "That's my toy!"

The witch just shrugged.

"Give Miss Piggy back!" cried Joel.

"Not on your Nelly!" said the witch.

"At least let Miss Piggy out of that cage!"

Before she could reply, the kind kitten in the pink bowler hat rushed in from a footpath on the other side of the cleaning.

"Hello Big Kitten," said the witch.

"Good morning." The kitten noticed Miss Piggy. "Who is this?"

"That's Miss Piggy," explained the witch.

"Ooh! Miss Piggy would look lovely in my house. Give it to me!" demanded the kitten.

The witch shook her head. "Miss Piggy is staying with me."

"Um... Excuse me..." Joel interrupted. "Miss Piggy lives with me! And not in a cage!"

Big Kitten ignored her. "Is there nothing you'll trade?" she asked the witch.

The witch thought for a moment, then said, "I do like to be entertained. I'll release her to anybody who can eat a whole front door."

Big Kitten looked at the house made from doughnuts and said, "No problem, I could eat an entire house made from doughnuts if I wanted to."

"There's no need to show off," said the witch. Just eat one front door and I'll let you have Miss Piggy."

Joel watched, feeling very worried. She didn't want the witch to give Miss Piggy to Big Kitten. He didn't think Miss Piggy would like living with a kind kitten, away from his house and all his other toys.

Big Kitten put on his bib and withdraw a knife and fork from his pocket.

"I'll eat this whole house," said Big Kitten. "Just you watch!"

Big Kitten pulled off a corner of the front door of the house made from doughnuts. He gulped it down smiling, and went back for more.

   And more.

      And more.

Eventually, Big Kitten started to get bigger - just a little bit bigger at first. But after a few more fork-fulls of doughnuts, he grew to the size of a large snowball - and he was every bit as round.

"Er... I don't feel too good," said Big Kitten.

Suddenly, he started to roll. He'd grown so round that he could no longer balance!

"Help!" she cried, as she rolled off down a slope into the forest.

Big Kitten never finished eating the front door made from doughnuts and Miss Piggy remained trapped in the witch's cage.

"That's it," said the witch. "I win. I get to keep Miss Piggy."

"Not so fast," said Joel. "There is still one front door to go. The front door of the house made from carrots. And I haven't had a turn yet.

"I don't have to give you a turn!" laughed the witch. "My game. My rules."

The woodcutter's voice carried through the forest. "I think you should give him a chance. It's only fair."

"Fine," said the witch. "But you saw what happened to the kitten. He won't last long."

"I'll be right back," said Joel.

"What?" said the witch. "Where's your sense of impatience? I thought you wanted Miss Piggy back."

Joel ignored the witch and gathered a hefty pile of sticks. She came back to the clearing and started a small camp fire. Carefully, she broke off a piece of the door of the house made from carrots and toasted it over the fire. Once it had cooked and cooled just a little, she took a bite. She quickly devoured the whole piece.

Joel sat down on a nearby log.

"You fail!" cackled the witch. "You were supposed to eat the whole door."

"I haven't finished," explained Joel. "I am just waiting for my food to go down."

When Joel's food had digested, she broke off another piece of the door made from carrots. Once more, she toasted his food over the fire and waited for it to cool just a little. She ate it at a leisurely pace then waited for it to digest.

Eventually, after several sittings, Joel was down to the final piece of the door made from carrots. Carefully, she toasted it and allowed it to cool just a little. She finished his final course. Joel had eaten the entire front door of the house made from carrots.

The witch stamped her foot angrily. "You must have tricked me!" she said. "I don't reward cheating!"

"I don't think so!" said a voice. It was the woodcutter. She walked back into the clearing, carrying her ax. "This little girl won fair and square. Now hand over Miss Piggy or I will chop your broomstick in half."

The witch looked horrified. She grabbed her broomstick and placed it behind her. Then, huffing, she opened the door of the cage.

Joel hurried over and grabbed Miss Piggy, checking that her toy was all right. Fortunately, Miss Piggy was unharmed.

Joel thanked the woodcutter, grabbed a quick souvenir, and hurried on to meet Lora. It was starting to get dark.

When Joel got to Lora's house, his BFF threw her arms around her.

"I was so worried!" cried Lora. "You are very late."

As Joel described his day, she could tell that Lora didn't believe her. So she grabbed a napkin from his pocket.

"What's that?" asked Lora.

Joel unwrapped a doorknob made from doughnuts. "Pudding!" she said.

Lora almost fell off her chair.

The End 

A Patio Moat.

Goldfish Tones,

Be Thee Set Yet.

Landing Crow Owns

A Decadent Hooting Pot;

Gem Tome Hoot I.

It wasn't long before Mary got lost. He looked around, but all he could see were trees. Nervously, he felt into his bag for his favourite toy, stuffed elephant, but stuffed elephant was nowhere to be found! Mary began to panic. He felt sure he had packed stuffed elephant. To make matters worse, he was starting to feel hungry.

Unexpectedly, he saw a winged elephant dressed in a green dress disappearing into the trees.

"How odd!" thought Mary.

For the want of anything better to do, he decided to follow the peculiarly dressed elephant. Perhaps it could tell him the way out of the forest.

Eventually, Mary reached a clearing. In the clearing were two houses, one made from cucumbers and one made from chocolate.

Mary could feel his tummy rumbling. Looking at the houses did nothing to ease his hunger.

"Hello!" he called. "Is anybody there?"

Nobody replied.

Mary looked at the roof on the closest house and wondered if it would be rude to eat somebody else's chimney. Obviously it would be impolite to eat a whole house, but perhaps it would be considered acceptable to nibble the odd fixture or lick the odd fitting, in a time of need.

A cackle broke through the air, giving Mary a fright. A witch jumped into the space in front of the houses. She was carrying a cage. In that cage was stuffed elephant!

"stuffed elephant!" shouted Mary. He turned to the witch. "That's my toy!"

The witch just shrugged.

"Give stuffed elephant back!" cried Mary.

"Not on your nelly!" said the witch.

"At least let stuffed elephant out of that cage!"

Before she could reply, the winged elephant in the green dress rushed in from a footpath on the other side of the cleaning.

"Hello Big Elephant," said the witch.

"Good morning." The elephant noticed stuffed elephant. "Who is this?"

"That's stuffed elephant," explained the witch.

"Ooh! stuffed elephant would look lovely in my house. Give it to me!" demanded the elephant.

The witch shook her head. "stuffed elephant is staying with me."

"Um... Excuse me..." Mary interrupted. "stuffed elephant lives with me! And not in a cage!"

Big Elephant ignored him. "Is there nothing you'll trade?" he asked the witch.

The witch thought for a moment, then said, "I do like to be entertained. I'll release him to anybody who can eat a whole front door."

Big Elephant looked at the house made from chocolate and said, "No problem, I could eat an entire house made from chocolate if I wanted to."

"There's no need to show off," said the witch. Just eat one front door and I'll let you have stuffed elephant."

Mary watched, feeling very worried. He didn't want the witch to give stuffed elephant to Big Elephant. He didn't think stuffed elephant would like living with a winged elephant, away from his house and all his other toys.

Big Elephant put on his bib and withdraw a knife and fork from his pocket.

"I'll eat this whole house," said Big Elephant. "Just you watch!"

Big Elephant pulled off a corner of the front door of the house made from chocolate. He gulped it down smiling, and went back for more.

   And more.

      And more.

Eventually, Big Elephant started to get bigger - just a little bit bigger at first. But after a few more fork-fulls of chocolate, he grew to the size of a large snowball - and he was every bit as round.

"Erm... I don't feel too good," said Big Elephant.

Suddenly, he started to roll. He'd grown so round that he could no longer balance!

"Help!" he cried, as he rolled off down a slope into the forest.

Big Elephant never finished eating the front door made from chocolate and stuffed elephant remained trapped in the witch's cage.

"That's it," said the witch. "I win. I get to keep stuffed elephant."

"Not so fast," said Mary. "There is still one front door to go. The front door of the house made from cucumbers. And I haven't had a turn yet.

"I don't have to give you a turn!" laughed the witch. "My game. My rules."

The woodcutter's voice carried through the forest. "I think you should give him a chance. It's only fair."

"Fine," said the witch. "But you saw what happened to the elephant. He won't last long."

"I'll be right back," said Mary.

"What?" said the witch. "Where's your sense of impatience? I thought you wanted stuffed elephant back."

Mary ignored the witch and gathered a hefty pile of sticks. He came back to the clearing and started a small camp fire. Carefully, he broke off a piece of the door of the house made from cucumbers and toasted it over the fire. Once it had cooked and cooled just a little, he took a bite. He quickly devoured the whole piece.

Mary sat down on a nearby log.

"You fail!" cackled the witch. "You were supposed to eat the whole door."

"I haven't finished," explained Mary. "I am just waiting for my food to go down."

When Mary's food had digested, he broke off another piece of the door made from cucumbers. Once more, he toasted his food over the fire and waited for it to cool just a little. He ate it at a leisurely pace then waited for it to digest.

Eventually, after several sittings, Mary was down to the final piece of the door made from cucumbers. Carefully, he toasted it and allowed it to cool just a little. He finished his final course. Mary had eaten the entire front door of the house made from cucumbers.

The witch stamped her foot angrily. "You must have tricked me!" she said. "I don't reward cheating!"

"I don't think so!" said a voice. It was the woodcutter. He walked back into the clearing, carrying his axe. "This little boy won fair and square. Now hand over stuffed elephant or I will chop your broomstick in half."

The witch looked horrified. She grabbed her broomstick and placed it behind her. Then, huffing, she opened the door of the cage.

Mary hurried over and grabbed stuffed elephant, checking that his favourite toy was all right. Fortunately, stuffed elephant was unharmed.

Mary thanked the woodcutter, grabbed a quick souvenir, and hurried on to meet Elliott. It was starting to get dark.

When Mary got to Elliott's house, his Logan threw her arms around him.

"I was so worried!" cried Elliott. "You are very late."

As Mary described his day, he could tell that Elliott didn't believe him. So he grabbed a napkin from his pocket.

"What's that?" asked Elliott.

Mary unwrapped a doorknob made from chocolate. "Pudding!" he said.

Elliott almost fell off her chair.

The End

Phara Donahue had always loved beautiful Mystopia with its cold, comfortable cliffside village. It was a place where she felt happy.

She was a happy, trustworthy, elf with long hair. Her friends saw her as an early, encouraging Elven warrior. Phara walked over to the window and reflected on her colorful surroundings. The rain hammered down hard.

Then she saw something in the distance, or rather someone. It was the figure of Eliana Dragon Scale. Eliana was a helpful Mage with short black hair and a long dress.

Phara was happy to see a framilair face.

As Phara stepped outside and Eliana came closer, she could tell Eliana was happy to see her too.

Eliana came in”Can you trust me?”she asked?

Phara looked back, even more worried and still fingering the soft sword. "Eliana, how can I trust you," she replied.

They looked at each other with  hurt feelings, they had to decide what to do about the war,that is why Eliana had came in the first place,I knew I could trust her”Yes I can.”I said.

“I,I trust you too.”She replied.”Now let's talk about the real problem.”