1. Full name: Laurance Angela E. Calbog

2. Bday: November 18, 2024

3. 17 years old (I can't with this)

4. Lives at 82 Rasay St. Toril Davao City

5. Goes to Ateneo de Davao University SHS

6. An only child with a cool mom

   
   

I have this tendency always to do my best. That's a good thing, right? But I obsess over it to the point that I exhaust myself and, sometimes, those around me. I constantly think of ways to do better than yesterday. I notice that when I try my best at something, it always ends up not being what I wanted, which is like a curse that's more annoying than painful.

Another example is that I'm an independent person. Too independent, perhaps. I get this a lot, and I agree that I don't really need anyone's help most of the time because I'm fully capable of taking care of myself, but that's the thing: I don't need anyone's help. The bad thing about being independent is that I'm used to being by myself, seeing everything as a one-man job. Though, it's admirable, it's something that I find sad about myself

I like butterflies at a safe distance for observing, but I avoid it when they're near or flying towards me. I learned butterflies land on people not because they're sweet but because they like the salty flavor. There's a thing called "pudding" where they drink blood for nutrients.

Lately, I've been into J-pop songs because of the energetic yet melancholic feeling I get from them. I was "exposed" to this genre way back in a pandemic. The artists I listen to are Ado, Syuduo, ATARASHI GAKKO, Ichiko Aoba, and Lamp.

I also like classical music because it makes me feel like a character in a book. Like the rest, I want a piece that is emotional and passionate. Tchaikovsky and Debussy perfectly capture those emotions because of the silkiness of their music, yet there is an underlying tone of intimacy. My favorite piece, however, wasn't created by those two composers but rather created by Camille Saint-Saens called the Carnival of Animals: Swan.

I take on challenges and strive to achieve great things because I believe I am meant for greater things and shouldn't limit myself or define myself. Somehow, I'm scared of being ordinary and utterly normal, though there is nothing wrong with being just that. I know I can do great things, so why not use it? Sylvia Plath, the author of a famous book today called "The Bell Jar," perfectly captured this feeling by saying, "What horrifies me the most is the idea of being useless: well-educated, brilliantly promising, and fading out into an indifferent middle-age."

That's why, in school, that's where I started to build my dream of becoming someone greater than the version of myself today. I studied hard, worked double time to meet Ateneo's standards, improved my character, and did more daily. Of course, this is all worth it because I can say that I have improved and seen my hard work come to fruition. But I wouldn't say the path to success is calm and fun. I lost sleep and time for myself and shed tears. It was hard to get to where I am now, and I know it took all of me not to give up on my dreams and simply accept that it is what it is. There was this one time when my name didn't appear in the list of honors in the first grade, and it was for the first time in so many years that I cried -- even if it's just a little. Thankfully, I picked myself up and stood my ground because I was too stubborn to sit down and accept it or too stubborn to cry. That's one thing I don't like about myself: I do not settle for less and will continue on fighting until I can't take it anymore.

Something that people always find surprising is that I drink tea, specifically green tea and peppermint tea. One of my goals is to have a balanced diet and to lose fat, and I've heard that drinking either one of those tea will help me achieve a nice body because it helps with digestion.

I do not know how to cook advanced dishes, even if my life depended on it. Though I know the basics, I might burn the house when it comes to making dishes that have more steps than simply adding salt and calling it a day. Maybe it's also because I forget the steps and the measurements or because I'm not good at remembering procedures. Still, lately, I'm trying to cook under the supervision of my mom, and it turned out fine and edible.

In Ateneo, I joined the Blue Bridge club—the school's English press. At first, my reason for joining was that I wanted to continue writing. Even if it's about politics and social problems, which are not topics I normally write about. But this club has exposed me to many issues, and it sparked something in me to shift my focus to topics about current issues and trends as well as controversial topics. I'm a feature writer because I prefer to write story-like, utilizing emotions and probing at the deeper zones in people's minds. My favorite journalist would be Kara David because she presents facts and issues that the government tries to cover up in a way that makes you feel what the people she interviews feel. Sorrow, joy, or anger, Kara David's words can bring that into your heart. That's why she's my idol in the journalism world. And someday, I want to bring people's stories to life.

I'm training to be a feature writer in online publications and to join DSPC next year.

Though, I've been painting and drawing here and there. I always find it hard to draw freely because I have this mindset to make it good immediately. But I realized I wouldn't go anywhere with that kind of thinking, so I tried to make it as free as possible. I sketch roughly without caring what the lines become. What I strive for every time I make art is to make it unkept yet coordinated. That's why I like the impressionism movement by Claude Monet. And he's my favorite artist in history. I prefer art pieces with paint strokes in different directions and colors overlapping each other with little to no use of blending techniques. Yet, even though it's a mess close up when you take a few steps back, it's a beautiful picture of lush sceneries rich with meaning and creativity.

My mother is compassionate, kind, independent, and understanding. I can say that she never gives up on something and will go through every challenge in her way. In our community, she's known by many as a person who plans for everything and has a backup plan for the backup plan. Though she has a bad temper sometimes, I love my mother wholeheartedly and will continue until my last breath. She really tries to be the mother I deserve, and I understand her struggles and am grateful for the sacrifices she made for me.

Also, my mother is a very talented person who is always curious about everything. She picks up everything quickly. This one time, she made an afilipiñana costume for me out of my grandmother's curtains. Another was when she made a corset herself with cartons and a black fabric. That's why when there are costumes involved, many people go to her and ask for something to rent.

My grandfather used to be in the Philippine Navy, and my grandmother used to be in many things I am not quite sure about. I heard she used to sew. My aunts and mother are like those typical sets of sisters. One is introverted, one is fashionable, one is a blend of everything, and the other is talkative. I love them all, and I'm sure I have acquired certain traits from them.

On the other hand, I have a love-hate relationship with my cousin. He was born when I was in grade three. At first, I thought he was cute because that's the normal reaction to newborns. Growing up, he became annoying, but I still consider him my cousin and will defend him in everything. One time, he kicked me in the nose and that was my first nose bleed in my life.

They're both annoying. I can't deny that. That's what friends are; they are annoying, yet you love them anyway.

Marja is the smartest and kindest person I know in this whole wide world. Through heartbreaks and failures, she knows what she's worth and will continue to fight anything that stands in her way. I like that fierceness in her. She has this drive to be better. I have seen her through her ups and downs and have seen her cry. But behind those tears is a girl ready to do anything for the ones she loves. A core memory I would like to say is when we were studying for an exam, and I slept over. Instead of studying, we ended up laughing until I couldn't breathe, and honestly, that was the best laugh I had in a while.

Vince is a person who feels more deeply than most. He may hide it secretly with a smile, but everything is visible in his eyes. We met during this year's summer and became friends instantly. I love his humor and the fact that we have similar tastes in music. Vince hugs us because he's affectionate and makes us feel comfortable. I wouldn't have written about him here if Vince didn't know Marja. I'm grateful for their constant presence in my life and the care and attention they give me when something's wrong. From the bottom of my heart, I wouldn't trade it for anything in this world.