Thank you very much for your post. It is very helpful to use as a learning tool during classes. The design and the way you have described the main points of four approaches of critical reflection is amazing. It fully covers the question required in the week's assignment.

Thank you for all who shared very personal experiences of their life transformation. It is very interesting to discover more about you.

 I am in the process of self- discovery as Karpiak (2005) wrote:” A person never is but is always becoming his or her self” (p.89) I cannot describe my one life story into this small post. It seems I have so much to say, so much to write if it means to tell my story. As Clark (2010) presented the narrative is a very effective method of learning. Clark says, “We learn hearing, telling and recognizing stories” (Clark,2010, p.6) The following infographic will represent how I have recognized my own life narrative via the stories of others.

References:

Clark, M. C. (2010). Narrative learning: Its contours and its possibilities. New directions for adult and continuing education, 2010(126), 3-11.

Karpiak, I. (2005). More than artistry: The integral aspect of autobiography. Canadian Journal of University Continuing Education, 31(1).

When my father spoke to me, he always began the conversation with "Have I told you yet today how much I adore you?" The expression of love was reciprocated and, in his later years, as his life began to visibly ebb, we grew even closer.... if that were possible.

At 82 he was ready to die, and I was ready to let him go so that his suffering would end. We laughed and cried and held hands and told each other of our love and agreed that it was time. I said, "Dad, after you've gone I want a sign from you that you're fine." He laughed at the absurdity of that; Dad didn't believe in reincarnation. I wasn't positive I did either, but I had had many experiences that convinced me I could get some signal "from the other side."

My father and I were so deeply connected I felt his heart attack in my chest at the moment he died. Later I mourned that the hospital, in their sterile wisdom, had not let me hold his hand as he had slipped away.

Day after day I prayed to hear from him, but nothing happened. Night after night I asked for a dream before I fell asleep. And yet four long months passed and I heard and felt nothing but grief at his loss. Mother had died five years before of Alzheimer's, and, though I had grown daughters of my own, I felt like a lost child.

One day, while I was lying on a massage table in a dark quiet room waiting for my appointment, a wave of longing for my father swept over me. I began to wonder if I had been too demanding in asking for a sign from him. I noticed that my mind was in a hyper-acute state. I experienced an unfamiliar clarity in which I could have added long columns of figures in my head. I checked to make sure I was awake and not dreaming, and I saw that I was as far removed from a dreamy state as one could possibly be. Each thought I had, was like a drop of water disturbing a still pond, and I marveled at the peacefulness of each passing moment. Then I thought, "I've been trying to control the messages from the other side; I will stop that now."

Suddenly my mother's face appeared—my mother, as she had been before Alzheimer's disease had stripped her of her mind, her humanity and 50 pounds. Her magnificent silver hair crowned her sweet face. She was so real and so close I felt I could reach out and touch her. She looked as she had a dozen years ago, before the wasting away had begun. I even smelled the fragrance of Joy, her favorite perfume. She

seemed to be waiting and did not speak. I wondered how it could happen that I was thinking of my father and my mother appeared, and I felt a little guilty that I had not asked for her as well.

I said, "Oh, Mother, I'm so sorry that you had to suffer with that horrible disease."

She tipped her head slightly to one side, as though to acknowledge what I had said about her suffering. Then she smiled—a beautiful smile—and said very distinctly, "But all I remember is love." And she disappeared.

I began to shiver in a room suddenly gone cold, and I knew in my bones that the love we give and receive is all that matters and all that is remembered. Suffering disappears - love remains.

Her words are the most important I have ever heard, and that moment is forever engraved on my heart.

I have not yet seen or heard from my father, but I have no doubts that someday, when I least expect it, he will appear and say, "Have I told you yet today that I love you?"

 Bobbie Probstein

My mum was pregnant for me when my dad died in accident at work in his late twenties. My mum had no choice but keep strong for the baby growing inside her who was the last memory from the beloved husband of hers. As a kid, I was always loved and adored by my mum but inside my heart there was always something missing. I felt disappointed when I met other children playing with their dads. Whenever I felt this longing, I came home crying, asking my mum why I did not have a dad. This question tore my mum into pieces and renewed her deep wound and she replied me with tears in her eyes: “You have an amazing dad who always loves you more than anyone else, who would be the happiest person to hold you in his hands. He is not alive, but his spirit is always with us, he can hear and see us, pray for our happiness in the world he left us reluctantly”. Of course, I did not understand these words, but they are engrained in my mind as milestones.

Whenever I felt lonely, whenever I had misunderstandings with my mum, I remembered mum’s words and addressed him aloud with tears in my eyes asking: “Why have you left me in this world?”. I took his photo and slept hugging it with my wet and swollen eyes. Whenever I was tired of the attacks of life and wanted to quit I asked him:” Why was I born? Why have not you taken me with you? Why have you left me to this world full of sufferings and injustice”. The last time I visited his tomb and cried saying that I was going to go to his side, I saw something glittering in his eyes in the tomb picture. It seemed that he was saying me these words: “It is so early for it, just hold on!” I have tried suicide twice but survived for some mysterious reasons all the time. Last year I had to go through unbearable family problems which made me beg for my death every day. I did not dare to commit suicide for the sake of my innocent sons who needed me more than anyone else in this world. I was so weak, and the feeling of motherhood could not stop me from the desire to die and stop all these sufferings.

One day in our usual conflicts with my husband I lost consciousness and found myself after a while in paralyzed condition that I could hear and see but could not move at all. He dragged me as a sack of sand out of the bathroom, breaking the locked door that I was hiding myself from his violence and left me in the lobby on the floor, cursed me and left. I was lying on the cold floor, felt the cold till my bones but I could neither utter a word nor move any parts of me. My sons came running and started begging me not to die. Bitter feelings came to my throat, but I was unable to cry even. My elder son ,who was 8 , started trying to carry me but he was so weak for it as a kid, he brought a glass of water and tried to put it in my mouth with tears in his eyes, all the water went all over my clothes and I was wet and shivering inside, still motionless like dead with my open eyes. My junior who was 5 thought I was playing a game with him and started tickling me and pouring water all over my body. His brother shouted at him and pushed him away from me, realizing that I was dying. Soon he found out that he needed to ask for help from someone and rushed to get my mobile phone. My husband who was still angry with me and thinking that I was role playing , took the phone and broke it down throwing it to the wall. My poor son rushed to the door for asking help from neighbors, again dad stopped him locking the door and getting the key for himself. My poor son started begging his dad to help me at least to bring to the bedroom, again saw the cold face of his dad who neglected his pleads. He again tried to carry me from my legs, crying and begging me not to die. I was still emotionless. It was 2 am and both of my sons stood by my side crying. He brought a duvet to cover me and lied by my side, holding my hands and checking my heartbeat.  And I heard the most touching words that returned me to life and helped me to talk at least. He said:” Mum, I love you so much. Please, don’t die. I need you. I will care about you. I will carry you in my hands when I grow up. Please, don’t leave me”. These words touched my heart and God gave me a chance to talk. I told him to go to his room to sleep not to sleep on the floor. He jumped up and hugged me crying aloud. Tears rolled down my cheeks. He didn’t leave me, and he didn’t sleep till I moved myself at about 5 am. I slowly moved my body and crawled to the bedroom. Next day I went work as if nothing happened and lost consciousness at work. I opened my eyes in the hospital when doctors were giving me electric shock. I was told that I was unconscious for more than 5 hours. They asked me to contact my relatives. I was not intending to tell this story as I started it with, my early memories related to my dad. These two stories are interconnected that I had to present it here. I always wanted to see my dad, to talk to him once in my life.

On this day in coma I could see and talk to him. He came to me and we had a long conversation:

       “- Dad, I missed you so much, why have you never visited me?

-          I have never been away from you even for a minute since you were born. You just did not feel that I was always there for you whenever you called me

 

-          I am tired of fighting. Please, take me with you. I want to be with you.

-          It is too early for it. You have a lot to do in this world. We will meet with you for sure some day after so many years.

 

-          Dad, I want to go now with you.

-          My sweet princess, do you know why were you born? You were born to fulfil my good deeds that I couldn’t finish as for my sudden death, to share love that I wanted to do all the time. You have my heart beating in your chest. Feel the love there and please do a favor for me. Share this love with people. The world needs you. You even don’t know yet how you can change many lives into better, how many people you can save  and how you can shine the hearts of people with your stunning smile and great heart.

 

-          Dad, it is so much painful for me. I cannot bear anymore.

-          Please, you are my strong girl. I will always stand by you. You have my power; you need to come over all these and see sunny days full of happiness and love. You deserve the best, my sweetie. I want you to fight to reach these bright days. This pain makes you stronger, be thankful and keep going. I am holding your hands. You have never been alone even when you felt so. Remember, you feel happier by giving more. Give people what you have: your abundant love and warm kindness” he left saying these words. It seemed like I was born again as a new person who was stronger and better.

Those who believe will get. I wanted to see my dad, I believed that it would happen some day and it did. Now, I always feel his company and feel grateful to be the daughter of such a great man.

 With love,

Gora

Dirkx, J. M. (2008). The meaning and role of emotions in adult learning. New Directions for Adult and Continuing Education, 2008(120), 7-18.

 Underestimation of Emotions

 John M. Dirkx tried to discuss the emotions and their significance in the adult learning process. It is obvious from the article that the emotional aspect of adult learning either less focused or completely disapproved in the previous works of different educators in different contexts. He claims that it is impossible to discover the potential of adult learners without considering their feelings during the learning process. The characteristics of emotions are portrayed and supported by the works of current authors who attach huge importance to the role of emotions in the adult education sphere. Dirkx describes his stance as a researcher who supports the revelation of diverse forms of emotions, both negative and positive while educating adults.

Dirkx uses narratives of adult learners to show how emotions cannot be ignored in adult education. These narratives clearly show how the author was challenging the view of suppressing emotions while educating adults. Also, he considers that it the main duty of adult educators to help adults to find out why they were experiencing a specific type of emotions, especially, negative emotions within the process of learning.

In the context of education, the direct revelation of emotions by both educators and learners were not commonly preferred and even avoided. It is due to the fact that such strong emotions might bring about serious conflicts.  The author presents the views of different authors that criticize the emotion-related form of learning.  Furthermore, the proponents of emotion-laden education are also presented to support the view that emotions clarification is of utmost importance in adult learning and facilitation.

The importance of emotions in human life is attached to the concept of identity and overall meaning-making process. Upon engaging with the world people demonstrate their personality via expressing their emotions. Limiting learners and educators from expressing emotions can be against the core purpose of a holistic approach to adult education. 

This article has fed my curious mind as an adult learner, who is confused and is experiencing difficulties in the learning process. The narrative approach to the article seems to make it more influential to the reader.  The stories of adult learners are so close to real-life situations that easily can draw the attention of any reader due to its genuine description. Dirkx expresses his stance as a proponent of using emotions as driving power in adult education. I completely agree with his point, as Jaggar (1997) also supported, by accepting the emotions an inseparable part of learners’ knowledge acquisition process we can increase the efficiency of the adult learning process. It is hard to imagine the learning to happen without intense emotions that exhibits the viewpoint of Palombo Weiss (2000).  Similar thoughts are expressed by Woerkom (2010), “So instead of passive or involuntary responses to the world, emotions should be seen as ways in which we engage actively and even construct the world” (p.347)

  The ideas of Dirkx is convincing because I see that emotions are still undervalued in the current adult education system.  As an adult learner, I have to suppress my intense feelings in the case of confusion or disagreement with the program structure or method of the educators.  It is so torturing to evade from the inner call coming from inside of you. I feel like I need to be fake not to disrespect the educator and even silence myself so that not to be excluded massively from the group. The success of the article can be seen in critiquing the current adult education system that excludes addressing the issue of emotions even though many authors have researched it so far.

Although I share similar views with Dirkx, I think it needs further evidence to support the idea of emotion-laden holistic versus of adult learning practice. I see an insufficient amount of evidence related to the issue of negative emotions that can lead to conflicts among the learner-learner and teacher-learner interactions. According to Brookfield (1986) adults can create a battlefield in the learning environment that may trigger really serious issues when religious and political assumptions of learners counteract with one another (Bohm, 2013). Thus, I think this article lacks adequate evidence that can suggest the ways of addressing conflict situations when emotions of learners are unleashed in the learning process. It would make the reader convince more that the emotion-based learning atmosphere is of great value and can be managed in the case of negative arousal. Further research would be beneficial in training of adult educators how to manage conflict situations simultaneously supporting freedom of emotions of learners.

In conclusion, the article is of great value in terms of its clear explanation and emergent topic that can address the current issue of the adult education sphere. The author successfully managed to respond to the questions that he aimed to reply in his introduction. This article can add to raising awareness of the emotional aspect of adult learning and can be of great value to both adult educators and learners. Even though I critiqued it as for the inadequate evidence to support his view, it looks like an intended purpose of the author to make the reader more curious by leaving it open.  

Bohm, D. (2013). On dialogue. Routledge.

Brookfield, S. Understanding and Facilitating Adult Learning. San Francisco: Jossey-Bass, 1986.

Dirkx, J. M. (2008). The meaning and role of emotions in adult learning. New Directions for Adult and Continuing Education, 2008(120), 7-18.

Jaggar, A. M. (1997). Love and knowledge: Emotion in feminist epistemology. In D. T. Meyers (Ed.), Feminist social thought: A reader (pp. 384-405). New York: Routledge.

Palombo Weiss, R. (2000). Emotion and learning. Training and Development, 54(11), 44-48.

Van Woerkom, M. (2010). Critical reflection as a rationalistic ideal. Adult Education Quarterly, 60(4), 339-356.