Now, just to be transparent, I do not think all of what was said in the video was completely absurd. But that is because some of the “rules” loosely resemble my dating philosophies. However, I do not believe that my philosophies are “right” compared to someone else’s. Or that they are the rules that every woman should follow to get a ring. One of the components of the video that I personally agree with is not waiting by the phone for my romantic interest to call. I think it is important for both men and women to leave space for themselves to be busy and unavailable. But this isn’t some type of ploy that I use to get a relationship or get a marriage proposal. Instead, my mentality of having space is in order to keep healthy boundaries. It is important for me as a person to recognize that I would not drop any pre-existing plans for anyone. But if someone calls me on a Friday and wants to have a date on a Sunday and I have nothing currently planned, then I would definitely consider accepting the date. I am not going to automatically say no just because it was Friday when they asked. 

However, if women feel like they want to play by these “rules” out of curiosity or because they want to try a new dating pattern, I will not shame them either. Women and men should be allowed to date in a way that fits them and allows for a healthy dating life. If some women need these rules to set healthy boundaries for themselves, who am I to disagree with or condemn them? After all, feminism is just respecting that women are capable and free to choose their own life path. 

Lastly, I want to point out that the interviewer seemed rather appalled that these two women came up with these rules to manipulate men. I think its interesting that anytime women advocate for themselves or try to take their power back, we are being manipulative or disrespectful. 

I want to first discuss the section of Chapter 8, “Sex in the Tinder Generation”, that explores the hookup culture and sexual trends for iGen’ers. I found it extremely shocking that, based on empirical evidence, iGen’ers are having less sex and fewer sexual partners than their predecessors. Based on the narrative so often pushed in all forms of media, I was under the impression that iGen’ers (which is my generation, I suppose) are having more sex than any other generation because of the simple accessibility to it. However, that is not true at all. Numbers do not lie and numbers suggest the opposite. There seems to be a decline among young adults in the iGeneration when it comes to sexual activity. Why is it that even though sex is more accessible, fewer young adults are having it at all? There were so many possible reasons that correlate with the data. For example, Twenge touches upon various explanations such as the decline in social interaction between iGen’ers, unwillingness to participate in hookup culture, fear of safety, and even the rise in oral sex in favor of traditional penetrative intercourse. It is true that people would rather hook up than explore meaningful relationships with one another in this generation. But many people are not comfortable exploring physical intimacy casually and so, they avoid it altogether. Some might feel that hookup culture is emotionless and cold and prefer more traditional aspects of romance and committed relationships in order to feel comfortable enough to even have sex. But then there is another frightening realization about why this generation is having less sex; iGen’ers simply lack socialization skills. They rather spend time on their phones, playing video games, or even watching pornography online than have actual human interaction in person. This makes me sad because it is an innate desire for human beings to seek out connection with one another. Has social media really deprived us of that basic human need? 

Another possible reason for the decline of sex amongst iGen’ers that I found most poignant was the iGen’ers’ have an overwhelming, but entirely valid, concern with well-being and safety. It is true that as soon as middle school I was aware of what STDs and STIs looked like on both the female and male genitalia. Before high school, I was warned of what being a teen mom would do to my social life, grades, and future. Basically, health class was a mere scare tactic into not having sex. And still, I am fearful of unwanted pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases. There is a lasting effect that these anti-sex campaigns have on the iGen’ers, even far beyond their adolescent years. Could this really have impacted an entire generation to avoid sex?

2. Has the rise in technology and social media platforms played a part in why relationships do not last as long as they used to? Think about all the dating as well as social media platforms, chatrooms, etc. and how much easier it is today to be unfaithful to your partner