Throne of Glass is currently a two book series with four prequel novellas. The books go in this order: the Assassin and the Pirate Lord, the Assassin and the Desert, the Assassin and the Underworld, and the Assassin and the Empire; the Throne of Glass, and the Crown of Midnight. The two arcs can be read before or after the other, it really doesn't matter; but it can be a bit confusing so I suggest reading the Assassin novellas first. I read all of these on my kindle and the novellas are 2.99 each, the others range from 5 to 9 dollars and are much longer. In my opinion, both arcs deserve 5 stars, but do not be fooled--any story involving assassins does not deserve a happy ending. The Throne of Glass arc is still in progress, but the Assassin arc isn't. I'll do a synopsis in my next few posts so this one doesn't seem to long and intimidating. Hope you check them out!

I wasn't joking when I said that killers don't deserve happy endings, and it's true. Well, at least they don't deserve happy backstories. Celaena Sardothien has got to have the saddest backstory I have ever heard; and believe me when I say her life doesn't get any better:

When she was eight years old she woke up to find her parents dead beside her. Knowing someone had killed them, she ran away soaked in blood and was found by the Assassin King--Arobynn Hamel. She was trained by him to become Adarlan's Assassin alongside her long thought nemesis in her line of work--Sam Cortland (can I say swoon?!). The two of them are sent to deliver a message to the Pirate Lord, and discover a black market slave trade going on. 

I don't want to say anymore but I will say than Celaena hates slavery. This is an epic adventure story in another land, and the places and names take some getting used to, but the story is amazing and I loved it. The rest of the books follow Celaena Sardothien along her killing spree through this medieval styled world, where magic stays hidden and friends plan to kill you. If you get really into books and can become very emotional and attached to characters like I do, I suggest wait awhile to read the Assassin and the Empire.

Have fun reading!

FYI, I am not just some sardistic killer of little girl's dreams when I say I love reading books about assassins, I also am, like, an extreme romance lover. I try to keep this part of me hidden at dinner conversations though. Just imagine trying to explain teen romance novels to your parents and 9 yr old brother. *shudder*.

Anywayy... back on topic. Just read an awesome novel called American Girl on Saturn by Nikki Godwin. Love it! But heads up, so so deep. I mean they seriously have fifteen minute conversations about the meaning of colors compared to fire. But that makes me love it even more! Cause thats my life in print!

The main character is one eighteen yr old Chloe Branson who is about to have a 0% chance at a summer social life. Her dad is a Secret Service Agent who offered to have the Canadian boy band- Spaceships Around Saturn- crash at their house. This is where Saturnite hottie (aka Milo) comes in. And can I just say that Chloe is totally star-struck.

This is a laugh out novel that will have you LYAO, and I mean it. The boys are amazing, but they are no match for the Branson sisters. Particularly 17 yr old Aralie, who I swear has a temper as hot as h***.

There is mild cussing due to the presence of 6 yr old Emery. And all inappropriateness is kept to a low level, except for one particular point in the story where Emery spots Milo(who just came from the pool and is wearing a towel) sitting on Chloe's bed helping her fix her computer. She then proceeds to run out of the room screaming at the top of her lungs "Milo is naked in Chloe's room!". Thus embarasing Chloe to galaxies beyond Saturn and back.

Check it out, and Enjoy!

And OMGosh, I have had my brother walk in on me reading Allegiant and I was a complete mess--I had thrown my kindle at the wall and was rocking back and forth on my bed hugging a pillow( which I then threw at him).

And another time I was reading Prince Tennyson(I'll do a review on that later), and she actually says in the synopsis that you will need a box of tissues. I didn't believe her and ended up walking out of my room, snot dripping and completely red in the face and whimpering. Flattering, right? As a warning: if an author tells you to get a box of tissues, you get it!

And also if you get emotional over books, lock yourself in a room and excuse yourself from soceity for the next few hours while you read.

TTYL!

It's a new turn on looking at the world of demons and angels, suggesting at an opposite view of the world where dark, light, and mundane meet.

The series stars Clary Fairchild who is reluctantly dragged into the world of shadowhunters when her mom is kidnapped by a few of them. As the series goes on she feels strangeley connected to the ever alluring Jace (don't wanna put his last name cause that would be a major spoiler). It is currently a five book series which as of presently (Dec 8th at 4:54) will be concluding in 169 days, 7 hrs, 5 min, and 28 sec. If you decide to read this series, I will personaly welcome you as one of the obsessed. So congrats, and read on!

17 seconds... 16 seconds... 15 seconds...

I want to do one last review before I turn my computer off for the next few hours, and here it is... Matched.

If you don't like romance novels stop reading this post now. Matched is a full blown, all out romance trilogy. I loved it, but it can be a bit confusing, so let me enlighten you. This story is set in a future utopia. Every part of your life is planned out for you. The Society(the government) decides what you do, what you eat, your health, who you marry, how many children you have, and when you die.

Cassia is in love with her best friend and hopes against all odds that they will be matched. And guess what they are! But when she gets home and is looking at the information all about her Match, something odd comes up. A different person's name and picture.

So be prepared when you pick up this book, you will be blown away by this futuristic love triangle, as Cassia tries to decide between safe and perfect, and dangerously mysterious.

I am not a striped horse, you cannot call me Zebra.

No colors before

Behold the animal

That all others adore

For she is unique

In colors to tell

Of stripes and strips

Paper and pen do dwell

To describe her is imposiblee

For she is thee

A creature of dark and creature of white

Reads Creepypasta and stays up all night

She is of stripes and will forever stay 

Something that sits, and eats nothing but hay

So be unique, as you truly are

For you are a Zebra

For that you are.

I know it's beautiful, enjoy it I just made a special effort for you. Now that review... all in all I found the Adventures of Curious George bland and distasteful. It seems very stereotypical that all monkeys are curious, and all men who own monkeys wear yellow hats. And on top of that all the stories seemed to end the same, the man in the yellow hat paying for all the problems that George caused. The only moral of this story is that if you want an adventure do something bad and try to injure yourself and others in the process.

So Zebra, what do you think of that?

You seem a little bit whacko Jeffery...

Do I need to take you shopping? Cause I know this adorable shop in town, that a bunch of old people go to, don't worry there's some people our age too. And they sell these amazing jackets... what's the brand again? Oh, yeah, they're called straight jackets. Do you want a white or black? Know what? I'll put in a special order that's white with black stripes just for you!

May the odds be ever in your favor

Hook, line, and sinker. They never stood a chance.

The first eight books in the series have zero romance in it, I'm not joking. I got hooked on these when I was eleven, and am still obsessed with them.

The story stars Nita Callahan, the bullied self proclaimed book-geek of a NYC middle school (I think). When she is running away from a particularly cruel group, she hides in the library. This is where she finds the book. It's a book on magic. In order to become a wizard, you have to pass an ordeal. At first, this all seems like some big hoax. But after Nita first witnesses a boy speaking in an unearthly language, sees a white hole, and gets sucked into a portal that leads to an alternate dimension--it does actually seem real.

Admittedly, the story has a bit of an odd beginning. But oh sweet heaven, I love this series more than Harry Potter. It's currently a nine book series, the tenth book coming out next year(I will die before that!!). Granted the main-character is eleven, but it rocks! The rest of the series follows her career in wizardry all the way through high school. 

The One's rule shall end! (SYWtbaW reference!)

Basically, it's about this brother and sister who get blown up (long story) and go down to Heck, which is where kids go when they weren't very good alive. So the entire book is about them trying to escape and I laughed so hard while reading it (I hate crying while reading).

Anyways, that is getting off topic.

What I like to write as well, something about making up your own world, knowing of the conspiracy behind the scenes, and having multiple tricks up your sleeve just thrills the mind. I usually write action and adventure. However, when i have a writer's block, i write horror stories about people from an insane asylum.

Most of the time i feel the need to read multiple books at once because i am so over whelmed by the story plots it gets me thinking: what if these stories were combined? what would the outcome be? It is a great way to spend your time.

Have you heard of Divergent? I highly suggest it. it is very similar to the hunger games, however the ending is for lack of a better word, a piece of $#!T. Sorry if you guys do not like how i blotted out, or even used that word. Some underage people do not need the extra "Vocabulary."

*yawn* Well, homework is rough tonight, and i am a huge procrastinator. I have got to leave. Huge test this friday.... Hope I don't bomb it!

also i DO NOT FANGIRL! over anything... just so as you know...

I don't get how you can't like romance novels, but I really shouldn't say anything considering I just got interested in them this past spring. The thing I love about romance novels though is when the author puts two people together who are polar opposites, and I spend half the book laughing at their misfortune! I just read a really good novel recently that I think you would like, admittedly it's a romance novel, but it is heck as hilarious, its one of the first reviews I did, It's all the way down there at the bottom. It's called American Girl on Saturn, and my brother was literaly banging on my door just to get me to shut up from laughing so hard! (Not that it helped or anything).

I am not joking when I say I'm a total book nerd, If you want something really good to read, check out the Throne of Glass series(first review, so it's all the way down there). Since it's all about assassins, there is alot of revenge, betrayal, and all of that other fun gory stuff. It doesn't get any romance until the end of the third "book" the Assassin and the Underworld. Heres a few of my favorite quote from that series:

She was a criminal--a prodigy at killing, a Queen of the Underworld--and yet... yet she was just a girl sent at seventeen to Endovier... But she-- at seventeen-- had gone to a death camp. And survived.

The sword whined as she drew it from the stand and held it in her hands. It was a good blade--strong, smooth, light. They wouldn't let her have a butter knife on her table, but they gave her access to this?

She wouldn't mind working with him--but not in the way Roland meant. Her way would include a dagger, a shovel, and an unmarked grave.

She tipped her head back and gave the moon a wicked smile. She'd been called Adarlan's Assassin for a reason. Dramatic entrances were practically her art form.

As you can see, I do a lot of highlighting! Hope you check it out, this is definitely one of my top favorite series!

You're a Romanian werewolf prince, your dad is the werewolf king, you are bossy, possessive, and territorial by nature, which would mean, you'd pee on what you want to mark as yours

It probably wasn't the best idea for me to start this series on a two hour long trip packed up in a mini van. there was a lot of "shut up"'s during that! I forgot to mention this is a werewolf, fae, magic series. No, there are no similarities between this and twilight. There are no sparkling vamps, and idiot lovesick males who are crushing on their best friends. The Prince of Wolves is a free e-book on amazon so at least check it out, you will not be disappointed.

Have fun reading!

I hate twilight. As some YouTubers say, "only gay vampires sparkle..." it was on this one movie and... that isn't the point. I read the book on recommendation from a friend (before it was popular) and regretted ever wasting my life on that. The first book was okay, that was until "Oh Edward," *said in dramatic voice* "I want to be with you forever!" NO. BELLA JUST SHUT UP!!! NO ONE CARES ABOUT YOUR STUPID, UGLY BOYFRIEND!!!!!

I do like humor, so i will consider reading the book you suggested. Thanks Eliza! <(*.*<)

HFRC!!!(Holy Freaking Romainian Carp (inside joke)) Qinney, my friends and i say the exact same thing at school too! It's so true... all of them, the vampires, they're all the same... GAY!!!

anyways have'nt done hw yet, biya!

K, I'm getting rid of all personal opinions and bad comments...

Anyway, Twilight follows Bella Swan through her new life in Seattle. She's just moved in with her dad, when she first sees Edward Cullen at school. In her opinion he is the most gorgeous guy she has ever seen in her life, but for some odd reason he seems to hate her. One night she gets separated from her friends in the big city and is chased by some thugs. Edward saves her and afterward takes her to dinner. Where he reveals that he does, in fact, have "superpowers". Later on in the story it is revealed that he and the rest of his family are vampires. I won't say anymore just so I can leave you in suspense.

I think Meyers is actually a really good writer, I just don't like what she writes about. She actualy did a really good book, the Host. It still had some of the annoying romance factors from Twilight though. 

Bye!

This is a collection of insults that my friends and I came up with, as well as some found on the internet. It's actually part of a whole book of insults on books and movies, but we never got around to publishing it:

*Twilight*

Some people say this is the best series ever—but we like to say the movies suck, the books are okay, and these insults are awesome!

Vampires – I kill the ones that sparkle for FREE

Only Twilight vampires wear glitter glue

Only Gay vampires sparkle in the sunlight

Real vamps don’t sparkle in the sunlight

Real vampires want to suck human’s blood

Real vampires don’t want to have an awkward relationship with a human

Real vampires don’t spend their free time kissing animals and learning how to play the piano

Real vampires spend their free time planning their next human murder

Real vampires are anti-social

Real vampires ignore civilization

Twilight vampires are only wanna bes because real vampires have fangs.

And most importantly:

Any how, enough with my "Ranting" I want to discuss what the book is really about if you havn't seen the movie.

Aliens attacked earth not to long ago, almost wipping out the entire human race. Ever since a young age the military has been using kid geniuses, to see who could be the one to end the war forever. Andrew (Ender) Wiggin, is a third child, horrible in any place of standing for the newly founded earth. When a bully picks on Ender, he fights back and almost kills the boy. For Ender, it is disgusting and it is a murderer, but the military sees why Ender did it: to stop any further attacks. They soon take him to an outer space camp, where they train all of the childern to become leaders and comanders for the invasion.

And by the way, how do you like my Twilight pics?

Charmwill Glimmer is the keeper to the Book of Beautiful Lies. And when he travels to a faraway place, to give the Boy Who Is A Shadow a second chance, a chain of events is set in motion--which cannot be stopped

Loki Blackstar doesn't remember anything. All he knows is that he is a half-anglel from heaven who disobeyed his "master's" wishes, and ended up falling in love with a demon girl. Now in order to ascend to Heaven he has to kill 99 demons before his 16th birthday. And that's before he's told of a vampire that is worth 99 vampires--the ever elusive, enchanting, Snow White.

On the island known as Sorrow, east of the sun and west of the moon, Snow White preys on the townspeople. She's a vampire, and her father started all the original vampire stories, which explains why most stories direct her looks to her mother wanting a child with hair as black as night, skin as white as snow, and lips as red as blood.

Snow White one, Snow White two,

Sorrow was coming out for you.

Snow White three, Snow White four,

Black as night, go lock your door.

Snow White five, Snow White six,

Blood red lips and crucifix.

Snow White seven, Snow White eight,

White as snow, don't stay up late.

Snow White nine, Snow White ten,

Snow White now killed Snow White then.

The Black Cat first: So, it's a short story about a guy who loves animals and he has all these pets in his house that he takes care of with his family. His favorite animal is this large black cat, which also loves him back. Basically, the guy goes crazy and does some weird stuff. In the end, karma comes and leads to his demise and the whole story is revolved around the black cat. I'm sorry, I know I'm horrible at reviews, but I really hope you read this story anyway. It is really creepy and leaves you with that oh-so-familiar icy feeling in your stomach after you finish it.

Next, Tell-Tale Heart, also a very creepy short story. This one starts out with the narrator trying to convince you that he's not crazy by telling you how smart he is and how cautious he was. He tells you the story of how he- well, you have to read the story to find out. When I finished the story (it only took me a few minutes to read) my first thoughts were "Wait, that's it?!" because it ends kinda suddenly, but also completely. I loved the stories and highly recommend that you read late at night with the lights off. :)

Again, I'm not good at writing these reviews, but I hope that doesn't matter much. :)

Anyway...

_

Shatter Me is the first in a trilogy, followed by Unravel Me, Ignite Me, and two novellas entitled Fracture Me and Destroy Me. This is a frantic love triangle with lots of twists and turns, and no it is not like Twilight, so kick those thoughts to the curb. 

_

Shatter Me starts off in an insane asylum, the series's kick ass female protagonist- Julitte- had been locked up for 264 days, and was taken away from her family for murder charges 2-3 years prior. She lives each day in a small room waiting for escape, looking out the small window that is her only connection to the outside world. Then one day the guards throw a wrench in her abused lifestyle, she is going to have a cellmate. Except they forgot to tell her that her cellmate is a boy.

Adam Kent joined the military when he finished school, and has been in love with Juliette long before she was hauled off. Now he's back in her life, but does he remember her?

Warner is the leader of Sector 45, he kills and gives orders without mercy. That is, until he meets Juliette.

Two boys and one girl, who's name is the misspelling of Shakespeare's tragic playwright. Love is easy for most people. That is, if you can touch the person you love.

_

Unravel Me is the second book in the trilogy. Juliette is free and on the run, but this time, she has help. After discovering a secret underground base, filled with people with talents like her own, Juliette finally feels a sense of belonging. But when you can kill your boyfriend with a kiss, life is never easy. And that, of course, is before said boyfriend's older brother steps into the equation. She hates one and loves the other, but only one she can touch with certainty. There is never a dull moment in the life of Juliette Ferrars.

_

Ignite Me, book three, and the final addition to the Shatter Me trilogy.

The Reestablishment has taken it's toll, but the good guys have taken their casualties hard too. Especially Juliette. Separated at the end of book two, the possibility of her friends' survival are pretty slim. And with that rocky end to her first romantic relationship, the deaths are hitting her hard.

_

Watch out people, Juliette is back, and out for revenge.

And this time, she's leaving the gloves behind.