This process has been challenging physically for me. I get fatigued very easily at the end of the dance so, it's difficult to make it through rehearsal. A lot of Love's movement is pelvis oriented and it stresses my hip. We do a lot of floor work and constantly getting up off the floor. That specific movement is still hard on my hip.

Although I previously wrote about my hip fatigue, I am still very proud of myself for everything I have been through. I am making it through all of the classes and rehearsals with a positive attitude, so that has been delightful. I also enjoy the pace at which we're moving in Love's process. It's slower, which is beneficial for me. I can really absorb what she's given us.

My expectations for this process have been challenged positively! I have always been used to choreographers setting material in a shorter time period. They wouldn't spend much time on the meaning of the piece, they would give us the choreo and then leave. This process is much different because we have some creative freedom. I have very little experience working with a choreographer who choreographs with improv. Love's process is slower than what I am used to, but I actually really enjoy it.

I believe I have grown stamina so far this semester. I had to jump into a busy and active life again after being bed/homebound for so long. I've been working really hard to build back my strength and I am starting to see it shine through in my dancing. Love's choreography is athletic and tiresome, but I have surprised myself with my abilities!

In general, October was a really hard month. It seemed like every day something went wrong. I felt like I could barely keep my head about water. With that being said, my rehearsals for Love's piece were an escape from the "real world." Some days, I didn't want to come to rehearsal because of anxiety, stress, and exhaustion. But I showed up for everyone and usually left rehearsal feeling much better. Dancing always centers me, so even when I feel like not showing up, I do it because I know I will feel better in the end. Being a member of this department and an addition to Love's dance is a privilege. And it is easy to take for granted when life is hard. When I start to feel this way I count my blessings, because I have so much to be grateful for.

Throughout my time in PDPR and college, I have learned the importance of communication. This semester specifically, I have realized I am not as good of a communicator as I thought. I have difficulties telling people my needs. Whether I need a break for my hip, or telling people I need help.

In our piece, communication is important because a majority of our dance is improv, and we have my make "go time" decisions. We have several "lifts" or "catches" that happen at any time or by any person. Communicating verbally and with our body language is so important in our dance. Otherwise, someone can get hurt or we lose track of our next step. This dance is hard because we don't have an exact timing or counts. Therefore, communicating and listening is so important.

Just as communicating is important in our piece, it is equally important in my relationships, academics, work, etc. I believe October was especially challenging because I'm in a season of growth and that growth is learning to communicate.

I'm getting so excited to finally perform. It has been so long since I've been a part of a show. I love the rehearsals, costume fittings, tech, and everything else that goes into show biz. I feel like I'm defrosting a part of myself that I've missed dearly.

At the beginning of the semester, I was really focused on healing and properly reintroducing dance post-surgery. And I (and my physical therapist) have done a great job doing so. I had a wonderful physical therapist who worked intensely to get me in tip-top shape. I followed his plan/regime closely, and it has made my recovery a success! I rest when I need to, keep up with my strengthening, and now I pay close attention to preventing injuries when I dance. I notice movement or unnecessary strain that can be harmful, and I correct it. After my surgery, I feel very aware of my body and how to dance safely (if that makes sense. It's hard to explain).

Now that DRT has ended, I can happily say my expectations were exceeded! I was nervous about the process for many reasons... auditioning, cyphering, my hip, and performing for the 1st time (in a long time). But of course, everything went very well, and I didn't need to stress. I loved being able to perform on a stage again. I was nervous that I wasn't going to be as good as I was, but I surprised myself. All seven shows felt great, and my biggest goal was to stay in character and give it my all each time.

Specifically, performing 7 times was challenging. I've never done that before, but I really enjoyed it. I could tell my body was getting tired/sore throughout the week, but I made it through! It was also challenging to keep movement organic the more times we did the show. I was doing my best to not look "choreographed" during the transitions, so that was challenging to do seven times.

Also, I tweaked my back the Monday before our first show and I freaked out. I was having pretty intense pain, but I did my best to take care of it before having to perform. I saw my PT and he gave me exercises, I did cryo therapy and red light therapy, and rested as much as I could. And thankfully that all helped me!

I have grown in many ways throughout this process. As a dancer, I have built my stamina- I have never performed a piece for 20 minutes. I was so worried I wasn't going to pick up the choreography or physically make it through the dance, but I did both of those things:) Love's piece was a great challenge for me because it was out of my comfort zone. We focused on dancing intentionally, listening to each other, and dancing with extremes. For example, extreme exhaustion and extreme weight shifting.

Next semester, I'm taking PDPR again, and I'm looking forward to being pushed even more! I want to refine my performance while taking risks. PDPR is wonderful for me because I would love to have some performance experience after I graduate and I feel that I will leave UT feeling prepared.