Well today is over. As I intended to write you while my day was going on, I slept. My energy was lower than the previous day. You already know how hard this is. Our boat named fucked. I'll spare us a rehashing today. Till we can have time for the space we need.

You letter was so sweet and I certainly can relate. When we talk I get so motivated. It's partially to do with your infectious personality. And it's not just me. You have the this energy of joy that when you speak to others seeps into them. You make people feel they matter or are important. The other part is how our connection feels when we talk. It gets stronger with each conversation. I know, I know what you're going to say. I agree but it's not like I don't like it. I am in awe of it. I can't imagine how it will bloom but I am looking forward to it.

We have more challenging days ahead but I will be here. I will hold tight to our conversations until the next. I can't promise you everything will be sunshine but I can promise that with any rain I will carry an umbrella.

a domani amore mio

your jasmine

I hope you know I wake before my alarm now. It's like a natural reflex now to try and catch you when you wake up. I desire every millisecond possible to talk to you.

I am so grateful that we had our moment today. It was so serene. Almost felt like I was spending the morning with you. Makes today feel a bit easier.

You'll be so proud of me that I got into gear and was productive. Have I actually done any of the important things, no, BUT I have set myself up to do so. I shall be starting now so I will be back to continue my letter soon.

... I have returned. Not as productive as I wanted to be but I am chugging away. I hope you've been having a wonderful day. I can't wait to hear all about what the places you have seen are like. I want to know what your favorite places was. What place was not as great as you thought. What do you wish you did. I am hear for all of it as if I was in your mind the entire time.

Meanwhile my mind has been rolling through different things that are uniquely ours and what could be ours. How can I share with you more when we are so far apart. I want you to feel as if I am beside you. Have we not advanced enough in tech for that to be possible. HA.

I must conclude my letter for today but I am always here for you. Thank you for being you and being in my life.

yours,

Jasmine

Love Mateus

You never cease to spark my intrigue. I won't press a topic that you are not ready to talk about but if there is anything I can do to make sure you are always comfortable talking to me, please let me know. I want to be able to always support you. I never want to make you feel judged or absurd or anything negative when you have something to say. I hope you know that I will learn to fly a plane so you don't have swim across the 7 oceans.

Would you like some positive news? I was extremely productive this morning. I didn't want to do the work, I was so uninpsired but due to anxiety I completed it. Now I have more work today that regardless of the anxiety I can't complete because I do not have the info. That's not positive, I am sorry ha. Work is chugging along and I am still trying to get a handle on the rhythm of it. I shall check in later my mi tesoro ...

IM BACK! Well I never left to be honest ha. I’m always right here. It feels like the evenings are harder. I do optimistically hope to talk to you though I know I shouldn’t right now. I can’t help it. The missing you is growing when I didn’t think it could grow more. I keep thinking of ways to make it easier in us but find that our boat doesn’t give us much wiggle room.

I won’t be sad. Nope. We got this. Our boat is perfect. Ha :) I’ll end this on that positive note. You’re amazing.

And I’m here for you, for what a lifetime will allow

Your Jasmine

I woke up missing you more today. I know you're gonna hate this but I was feeling down and really wanted dose of you. It feels selfish to want you in this way. But somehow you make it feel ok to share the sad with. I know you wish I would only be happy but it's not how my brain is wired. I know distance is hard on us in this aspect. I feel we are both people who want to physically be there through the more difficult times. What I will say is that just talking with you helps more than you think it does.

ITS BEAUTIFUL, and I cannot reiterate it enough. It definately sends the message you were aiming for. I was completely shocked and overwhelmed with joy. I had it by my side while I worked for a while. It brought a smile to my face.

I know this isn't much of a letter today but I don't want to ramble all my thoughts at the moment. I want to revel in the beautiful gift, revel in the beautiful gesture, revel in the joy and revel in our boat.

always in the boat,

your gremlin

Apparently my update didn’t save yesterday -_- ugh! I’m going to check my computer later and see if maybe the internet was being slow. It’s possible.

I did something stupid yesterday. Meandered the media of social. I didn’t really expect to feel the way I feel about it. Maybe it has a lot to do with how low this week is for me. I promise that there are positive feelings. I just don’t want to hide what’s actually going on in the moment. And I promise that I am filled with the love that you express. I’ll stop ruminating on this now and try to just do regular things and see how the day goes.

My hope today is to make headway with work. Mundane I know haha but it’s what the day is. I hope the food your eating is mouth watering and the sites you see are breathe taking.

Ok so I realized I didn't press update on my last letter, it is updated now. Please ignore my earlier ramble rant.

What a beautiful letter amore mio. I learn more and more about you and your amazingness each day. I feel like there's something in me that I want to say but my mind hasn't formed the words yet to articulate it. I think I am going to try and write in a bit a see what comes out.

You're one my mind endlessly, it feels like you've been there for eternity ... from the beginning.

I hope you had a beautiful day and I cannot wait till I get to see you.

<3

Jasmine

I missed yesterday. I am sorry. It was a much busier day and I was exhausted! I even fell asleep without trying to sleep. I had work to finish, which is what I am doing so early this morning. To make up for yesterday, today's letter will be longer. Enjoy all the extra rambling.

So a summary on yesterday - I was productive I guess. I had to complete something that took more effort and time I thought it would. The heat and exhuastion made it a more difficult day for my patience. BUUUUUT i so appreciate my reward ;) SO dangerous ... How from so far with limited communication do you makeme want more and more of you. How dare I be so greedy! It does also make me want to cherish you more. Show you how much you mean to me. Give you everything you've ever dreamed of and maybe even things you didn't even know were possible. The gift i bought for you came in. I need to figure out how to get it to you. I don't know if you'll even like it but it has a cute concept and even if you don't like the gift i feel you'll like the concept.

I need to get some work done but I'll come back later with today's updates. Know that while I work your gift is literally and figuratively lighting up my world.

I was productive today and many bene things happened at work. I would love to tell you about it. I can’t wait until we have time to talk more. Nothing I try to write now seems any good compared to your note. So beautiful. I appreciate hearing about your dreams. I hope you get what you want and the dreams comes to you again. I would love to hear more. A few more days and we can talk again. I’ll try to keep myself occupied so my days go by quicker. Ugh. The nights are hard. The extra silence is deafening. Until tomorrow you.

❤️Jasmine

we have all these expectations that we know how things will go, or we play out all these what ifs ... but what do we want? what do we want now?

I try to answer this but you leave me speechless. You may have melted today but I could hardly tell. Everything goes blank. I'm just there, taking in all of you. How do you get someone like me to stop thinking and just be? I don't know if you understand the gravity of that.

I am genuinely curious to know what you see when you look at me. Can you see the anxiety that seeps through my smile? Can you see the desire beating through my chest? Can you see longing racing through my mind? Can you hear the love pouring from my words? Do you see the light reflecting from my eyes?

Know that no matter what beauty you see in me, it's only there because you're the one looking. I treat you the way you deserve to be treated and I know what that is b/c it's the way you treat me.

You bring me unbelievable happiness Matues and I love you too, so much.

always thinking of being in your embrace,

your Jasmine

to leave. You're going to have a beautiful home that brings

you peace, and you're going to have a dynamic career that

gives you purpose. You're going to wake up next to the

love of your life and spill sweet words over morning coffee.

You're goingto have slow Sundays and wholesome holi-

days. Your art is going to be impactful and you're going to

be recognized for your devotion. You're going to travel and

see the world and you're going to encounter incredible

people along the way. You're going to be seen for who you

are and appreciated for all that you do.

i love you

<3 jasmine