https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo Think about an example in your own life when you were either impacted by one of those toxic rain clouds or when you unknowingly perpetuated one of those clouds. (at home, school, church, organization, etc.) What happened? Where? How did you feel? en-us 2021-03-30 05:05:54 UTC 2021-03-30 17:39:09 UTC hello@padlet.com https://padlet.net/icons/png/2601.png https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368714131 I worked at a charter school run by White men. My male, less experienced, and less effective (in terms of student growth) colleague made more money than I did. When I brought this forward to my principal, his body language suggested he felt harassed and disgusted. He denied culpability and said he wouldn't help. This is the same man who flirted with young female teachers, had sex with them in broom closets, and even asked my friend, who he started a sexual relationship with when she was a 22-year-old TFA corp member, to babysit his children while he took his wife (my friend's coach, mentor, and colleague) on dates. This is also the same man who would throw chairs across the gymnasium during community meetings, scream at the top of his lungs in anger, and tell Black boys that if they couldn't behave, the school didn't need them. I felt physically ill at this school--I was hospitalized at least three times for unbearable migraines. I once threw up on myself on the drive home. I felt scared, in physical pain, complicit, and replaceable. ]]> 2021-03-30 16:27:57 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368714131 https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368714257 Although rooted from white supremacy, it is disappointing that when one ethnic group of color is dealing with violence, the other ethnic group of colors don't step up to defend their siblings of color who don't share the same ethnicity. ]]> 2021-03-30 16:27:58 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368714257 https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368715662 When I worked in the beauty industry and tried to get involved with pageants at a young age ]]> 2021-03-30 16:28:20 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368715662 mckenzieparkins https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368716092 I was raised in a house that saw my culture as superior than others and grew up with animosity towards a lot of POC from specific countries.

The same ugly words an beliefs I've heard my mom say, I've said. 

I think Saying and believing these things made me feel superior. That I was better than someone else. Saying it in open spaces with people who had similarity bonded us together. We were better than someone else. ]]> 2021-03-30 16:28:27 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368716092 https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368716688 The patriarchy gives me and millions of other women on this planet the message everyday that I am only as good as I am beautiful. I am only as valuable as I am docile. That my worth lies in the degree to which I fit myself into their models of beauty and femininity. The patriarchy makes me feel bad about myself for never being able to live up to their standards. Standards that are nefarious and that I don't even want to live up to, but that are so ingrained into every part of society that I have internalized them and so I do still want to live up to them. I want to subvert the patriarchy while at the same time I feel guilty for living my life according to its precepts. The patriarchy makes me complicit in my own objectification and dehumanization. I feel tired of it. I feel hopeless because the problem is so big and glaring and yet so many people don't even see it. ]]> 2021-03-30 16:28:35 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368716688 https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368716854 Being unable to afford to attend enrichment programs that other students were able to afford. It made me feel like they had an unfair advantage. I had to be creative and find other ways to prepare myself for college.]]> 2021-03-30 16:28:37 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368716854 https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368717636 my extended family has not talked to me since i came out/was outed to them. i still miss them deeply and can't think about my culture without thinking of earlier memories i had spent with them. ]]> 2021-03-30 16:28:49 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368717636 https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368718698 has defined and perpetuated trauma within my contexts and the resources/opportunities available/not available to my family, communities and loved ones]]> 2021-03-30 16:29:05 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368718698 krisdelatorre1 https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368718721 Working and learning outside is a gift but it can easily become a setting that feels unsafe or inaccessible to those who are differently abled. The opposite is true! Without naming and/or designing learning experiences to include everyone, working and learning outdoors feels like a privilege when it is something we all can and should share. How can we change our language and the representation of stewards of the land that emphasizes access for everyone?]]> 2021-03-30 16:29:05 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368718721 https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368719023 This feeling of constantly having to hustle to "prove myself". Constantly working on feeling enough, as I am in my skin.]]> 2021-03-30 16:29:10 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368719023 https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368719879 Realizing the ways that the myth of white supremacy influenced me to believe that the right and good way to exist as a white woman was to be silent, avoidant, non-confrontational in the face of conflict]]> 2021-03-30 16:29:22 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368719879 aberdahlbaldwin https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368720659 Having cisgender men tell me (in family, in medical settings, in school, in relationships) they know me, my health, and my needs better than I do—and sometimes I believe them. This makes me feel insecure, doubtful, and shaky. I forget my own capacity and power. ]]> 2021-03-30 16:29:32 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368720659 https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368720755 Dating men who do not understand my urgency or why I am always discussing issues around sexism and misogyny. It's isolating and exhausting. Especially, when they defend their sexists friends and you don't want to make things worse.]]> 2021-03-30 16:29:32 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368720755 https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368721341 2021-03-30 16:29:38 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368721341 crodi2 https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368722494 I was out at a bar in South Boston with some friends on a Sunday afternoon. One of my friends told me that a man had groped her up her skirt and she was very upset. I approached the man pretty aggressively and he threw me down on to the floor. Not a single man at the bar tried to help. The bouncer then tried to kick me out because he thought I was starting a fight with the man. At that point I was just angry and started leaving, and one of my friends started crying. As we were leaving, she told the host (a woman) what had happened, who was the only one who seemed concerned. She pulled the manager and he seemed sort of apologetic, but at that point it was way too little too late. ]]> 2021-03-30 16:29:52 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368722494 https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368723836 in zoom coffee hour, the conversation was around a "dilapidated" church that belongs to the local tribe. Ppl were bemoaning this and eventually asked what I thought, and I said I don't really care about the structures so much as the people. I said it gently but directly, and one person signed off (I haven't followed up to see why). Realizing I have been more inactive in indigenous solidarity in the 16 months I've been part of the church than I'd like to admit.]]> 2021-03-30 16:30:12 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368723836 https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368724460 White liberals use cute rhetoric to be allies, but yet, are the ones violating the rights of oppressed communities. 

Ex. Starbucks promote progressive causes...but do they pay coffee growers living wages? NO!!

Can't trust white people who steal our cultures - music, food, language, clothing, etc.

]]> 2021-03-30 16:30:21 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368724460 https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368725327 I have several mental illnesses and a disability, and I often forget things/dissociate in important times which really impacts my work and school and I am always afraid that it makes me come across as someone who does not care/is disorganized]]> 2021-03-30 16:30:34 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368725327 https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368725654 I came out to most of the people in my life a while ago, but even my close straight friends seem to act as if they've forgotten or want to erase that part of me. their language is VERY heteronormative/noninclusive, and makes me feel like I want to hide or shrink into the furniture. I just need more queer friends tbh]]> 2021-03-30 16:30:39 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368725654 https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368727640 In my predominately white high school, I was called to the Dean's office multiple times when there was stealing on campus and a severe bullying incident. All the while, I was being bullied by other girls. That felt very lonely.]]> 2021-03-30 16:31:07 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368727640 https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368727846 I have memories from very early on of my gender expression being policed. I remember riding in a car with my cousins, and they all started laughing and whispering to each other. I eventually realized it was because I was sitting with my legs crossed; I remember hearing the phrase "boys don't sit with their legs crossed." I felt like my body was wrong. I wanted to crawl into a hole. I didn't sit with my legs crossed again for 20 years.]]> 2021-03-30 16:31:09 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368727846 https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368729004 Experiencing dating abuse and being ashamed to talk about it. ]]> 2021-03-30 16:31:27 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368729004 https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368729030 as a woman of color, navigating spaces with caution in terms of my body after traumatic experiences ]]> 2021-03-30 16:31:28 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368729030 aberdahlbaldwin https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368730850 harming my body/health to survive in a capitalist system ]]> 2021-03-30 16:31:54 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368730850 https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368730990 I had a teacher spread rumors about me, that I wasn't type A. Not sure who the hell she thinks she is?! We cannot assume that Type A is what we are all suppose to be. What does that even mean? I did my job well and my students were growing. I dont have to move or think like you. This is also white supremacy.]]> 2021-03-30 16:31:57 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368730990 aeridtech https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368732178 My sister uses a wheelchair, and it is IMPOSSIBLE to take her around Harvard. The physical environment was not at all built for her. This includes HGSE. We had to walk around buildings and courtyards just to move 10 feet away from our original spot.]]> 2021-03-30 16:32:14 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368732178 tiffanymellard https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368733935 navigating the industry that I work in as a black woman, I am hyperaware of how my complexion can often work to my advantage and can also be a disadvantage because I was right "in the middle". However, my kinky textured hair took away from any potential "racial ambiguity" that would have benefitted me in the pursuit of jobs. people on staff "didn't know what to do" with my hair", I had to get my own make up because I wasn't provided the right shade for my complexion.]]> 2021-03-30 16:32:41 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368733935 https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368734384 I think for much of my life I have been aware of colorism and how my family has benefitted from being lighter skinned. I’ve watched as white people have been more comfortable around me and my white friends parents have liked me more or invited me into their homes more often than my darker skinned friends. Part of me knew that it was wrong but another part of me did not feel compelled to speak on it because I was the one benefitting. I have had less experiences with racism because of colorism, because of my “racial ambiguity” due to my light skin.]]> 2021-03-30 16:32:48 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368734384 mckenzieparkins https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368737087 "Children should be heard not seen" ]]> 2021-03-30 16:33:29 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368737087 mghiden https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368737519 A high school coach would make a joke out of (probably inaccurate) statistics of homosexuality in men. Disingenuously talking about acceptance.]]> 2021-03-30 16:33:35 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368737519 https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368738288 I have worked as an English teacher in former European colonies around the world. I only recently realized that I was perpetuating colonial ideals. I feel guilty and disappointed in myself. I feel sad if my actions made any of my beloved students feel less about themselves, their languages, their skin, their cultures.]]> 2021-03-30 16:33:46 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368738288 https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368738604 constantly being asked if I had a boyfriend yet when I would visit extended family throughout my childhood - as though it were the most interesting part of me/assuming that a heterosexual relationship was the norm.]]> 2021-03-30 16:33:51 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368738604 https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368738966 For the longest time at work I couldn't understand why my ideas weren't being taken seriously. At first, I thought it was because my ideas were not very good. But one day in a conversation with my supervisor he was talking about how old he felt, and I shared that I felt the same way. He laughed and said I was only 22 and that I didn't truly know. When I shared I was 27, he stopped laughing. Ever since, my ideas carry more weight in group discussions SURROUNDING EDUCATION.]]> 2021-03-30 16:33:56 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368738966 https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368739029 I am first generation, from a working-middle class family. Parts of my culture have been routinely dismissed as "low class" by people at my undergrad, people in TFA, and my spouse's family. I have been shamed for the way I speak, the way I emote, the way I die my hair, the clothes I wear, and the amount of time and effort I needed to put in to getting caught up to peers academically at elite institutions. ]]> 2021-03-30 16:33:57 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368739029 mckenzieparkins https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368744071 I used to yell at my roommates about using too much paper towels and toilet paper. 

I'd twist a lightbulb from a bathroom to conserve energy - because that's what we did in my house. 

My friends would laugh at me. I never realized I did this because I was poor. ]]> 2021-03-30 16:35:07 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368744071 https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368745753 Wish I could do more to help my trans-siblings.]]> 2021-03-30 16:35:32 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368745753 https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368745937 Growing up in a Latinx household, my parents constantly encouraged me to marry a white woman to "mejorar la familia." Coming from a mestizo family, I felt the constant pain of my parents not loving my skin or even their own skin. Whiteness and colorism worked together to judge and shape the experiences of my unborn babies. Since then, I've learned to love my skin and regardless of who I marry or choose as a life long partner, I know my babies will beautiful! 

]]> 2021-03-30 16:35:35 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368745937 https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368747115 +Colonialism - our first language is not the ancestral language of our community. It may be lost forever.]]> 2021-03-30 16:35:50 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368747115 https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368752957 As a woman, taking public transit means figuring out the safest way to be around men. I don’t think this strategizing how to live my day in relation to men is limited to public transit but I’ve felt the most unsafe in these situations. When I was a teen, I remembered being on the bus and a group of guys my age decided to surround me and make comments about my body to each other. I was so terrified I stopped a few blocks ahead of my usual stop to get away from them.  As I reflect, I think about the countless times I’ve done that. How easy it is to rearrange my day without question because a man decided to follow me in the street or stare at me on the subway. What feels most toxic is that I can’t recall anyone saying anything when they witnessed my harassment. Even people in my family think it’s a sign of how attractive I am if men are compelled to follow me or yell at me. ]]> 2021-03-30 16:37:11 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368752957 https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368753601 Being on Zoom has allowed so many disabled/neurodivergent folks enter spaces they previously had no access to. This could have been done years before, but since able-bodied people didn't need it, it didn't matter. Also holding space for deaf, hard or hearing, and blind folks who may still struggle.]]> 2021-03-30 16:37:21 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368753601 https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368753759 My mom and I are best friends. Ever since I was a child, she told me that, “It doesn’t matter if you walk outside butt naked. That does not give a man permission to touch you. No means no.” But when it happened in real life, the reaction was a little different. 
I was sexually assaulted last summer. It started consensually, but literally two minutes in I changed my mind. I voiced that I didn’t like it. I don’t want to do this anymore. Stop. No. But it wasn’t enough. When I told my mom and a family friend that I voiced my discomfort in more ways than 1, I was suddenly informed that “no” wasn’t enough of a response. I was met with, “Why didn’t you cry? Why didn’t you scream? Why didn’t you yell? Why didn’t you punch him?” I didn’t know I had to. 
Why do I have to stab, scream, and punch for a man to understand that “I don’t like this. Stop. I am uncomfortable. I don’t want to do this.” Isn’t a suggestion? Why are men from birth absolved from accountability? Why in a situation were I was the victim end up receiving more blame than the perpetrator? I felt sad and helpless and unheard. ]]> 2021-03-30 16:37:23 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368753759 https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368754104 I worry about how fat and ugly I am every day. It makes me feel anxious and tired. ]]> 2021-03-30 16:37:28 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368754104 mckenzieparkins https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368756146 patriarchy is why I count calories, to get thicker, be fuller, to a mans eyes. ]]> 2021-03-30 16:37:57 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368756146 https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368757746 Than people of color]]> 2021-03-30 16:38:20 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368757746 https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368758641 I forget that I have a disability because society doesn't treat it as such. I am depressed and anxious. I have suffered from eating disorders. I get debilitating migraines. But I forget that this is a legitimate disability that matters. ]]> 2021-03-30 16:38:33 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368758641 https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368759186 I feel very protective of my trans friends and I am constantly in fear for their safety. One day me and my friend, who is a dark skinned black trans woman, were walking down the street when a man started to harass her. I confronted the man and began to argue with him. I had a weapon and threatened him with it and he went away. My friend was pissed at me afterwards and wouldn’t talk to me. She explained later how much I put her at risk in that moment considering if the police were called she would’ve been in the most danger. I dehumanized her the moment I didn’t ask her what she wanted to do and prioritized what I “felt” was right over her right to consent to how she wanted to respond to the violence she was experiencing.  ]]> 2021-03-30 16:38:40 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368759186 https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368784721 2021-03-30 16:44:45 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368784721 https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368788101 2021-03-30 16:45:36 UTC https://padlet.com/missv81/joln4gn4px02miqo/wish/1368788101