https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4 Ethan Kos-Dondlinger en-us 2021-02-23 17:42:34 UTC 2021-02-24 18:44:09 UTC hello@padlet.com 8020764 https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232774804 As a swimmer I was gifted. I was fast and strong headed. However the environment taught me no discipline. Coaches were letting me skip practices and overall not helping me better myself for the future making me a not so well rounded person when it comes to criticism. (Nature gave me the ability, Nurture or lack thereof cause me to walk away from it)

]]> 2021-02-23 17:47:18 UTC https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232774804 8020764 https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232787089 I was in the pre-conventional stage for this event.  When the bombing happened, I listened to my parents and was obedient to what they told me to do. Part of that was because I was really scared. Part was because I knew it was the right thing to do.]]> 2021-02-23 17:49:18 UTC https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232787089 8020764 https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232793240 I walked into high school as I did middle school with no emotion. The goal was to just get out, however the environment around me led me to making poor choices as I wanted to fit in. This ruined my reputation on the swim team and all of my previous friends started to give up on me. Everyone thought I was lost. Addiction ran through my family so i've always had the personality trait which isn't a bad thing unless presented with the wrong things. I made poor choices and those poor choices helped shape me into the man I am today. (Nature made me do it!, Nature from family and friends got me through it to deal with it)

]]> 2021-02-23 17:50:19 UTC https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232793240 8020764 https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232796246 I was in the pre--conventional stage for a very long time. I was not able to relate that while my birth parents gave me up it wasn't that they abandoned me (or at least for my birth mom that is). I struggled with that and felt bad for myself for a very long time. Now I see that adoption can be a very good thing for everyone involved, and think I have moved into the convention or possibly even the post conventional stage.]]> 2021-02-23 17:50:50 UTC https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232796246 8020764 https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232804391 I moved from pre-conventional to conventional stages while on the swim team. Unfortunately, my coaches didn't do a good job of being authoritative, so I didn't learn to be obedient in the pre-conventional state. Because of that I moved more slowly into conventional and eventually quit the team because I didn't like the practices and schedule. When they started to push obedience on me, I had already passed that point.]]> 2021-02-23 17:52:15 UTC https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232804391 8020764 https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232811134 While on the swim team, I was good enough to be a region, state and national level swimmer. There were only one or two people my age on the team who were as good or better than me. I didn't realize how hard other people had to work just to be an average swimmer. I got stuck in the industry vs. Inferiority stage because while I knew I was a good swimmer, it didn't help me gain confidence. I was still worried about what people thought. The coaches never gave me praise so I thought I was not doing well. I eventually left swimming even though I was in the top 5% in the nation.]]> 2021-02-23 17:53:27 UTC https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232811134 8020764 https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232830087 These parenting styles are shown in my coaches specifically permissive parenting as the coaches were letting me do my own thing resulting in poor decision making for the future of my sports.]]> 2021-02-23 17:56:42 UTC https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232830087 8020764 https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232836205 our generation was the most successful group since 1990s that being said we were the best swimmers theyve seen in a while and we didnt like practice so they wouldnt care if we skipped they would let it go.]]> 2021-02-23 17:57:46 UTC https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232836205 8020764 https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232845914 There was nothing genetically attached to this situation however the environment was chaos people running and screaming for their lives. I was scared in that situation just like everyone else. This helped me realize that life isn't always happy and it doesn't go the way you expect. This event in my life taught me the biggest lesson of my life and that is to not get distracted over emotions when lives are on the line. Overall helping me with decision making in fast quickly needed moments. (Nature took over for me)

]]> 2021-02-23 17:59:31 UTC https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232845914 8020764 https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232879558 I was 9 years old when The Boston Marathon Bombing happened. We were actually right across from where the bombs went off about 20 minutes before they went off. We were trying to see my mom cross the finish line. We gave up trying to find her when she called us and told us she had her equipment bag and would meet us at the maker for her last name. We went to meet her and started back to the hotel. The area we were walking in was in a triangle and about two blocks from the place where the bombs went off. We heard a loud pop, but didn't think anything was wrong. We hear a second pop and within seconds we saw the smoke and saw people running toward us. we ran to the hotel to get our bags because we were supposed to go to the airport. I was scared. I think I got caught in the Industry vs. Inferiority because I had a hard time feeling good about the world. We got to the airport and there were people with machine guns. I felt helpless and didn't feel like I was safe. I felt like I didn't matter because I could have been the one to get hurt or killed. I lost confidence in myself and the world. ]]> 2021-02-23 18:05:15 UTC https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232879558 8020764 https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232884305 Its a bit harder to explain a parenting style however in that moment my parents were showing a lot of authoritative they expected a lot from us in that moment tho when we did something wrong they would tell us not to do that and end it with a because...]]> 2021-02-23 18:06:04 UTC https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232884305 8020764 https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232888143 Our generation was not necessarily involved with this event as we were too young to race and too young to parent a family. However our generation isnt the smartest so i being a child was clueless as to what was going on until i heard people screaming words i wish to never hear again. we were clueless and didnt know what to do so we were just following and listening closely to our parents.]]> 2021-02-23 18:06:44 UTC https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232888143 8020764 https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232895786 I made some really bad choices at the beginning of my High School Career. I didn't know who I was, I didn't know where I fit in. I was trying to figure it our by being cool. I clearly  messed up and tis is because I was stuck in the Identity vs. Role Confusion Stage.  Frankly I am still there today, but not for the same reasons. Now it is because I want to choose a good friend group and a good career path...but I am still confused on who I am and who I will be.]]> 2021-02-23 18:08:04 UTC https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232895786 8020764 https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232898388 I clearly was still in the pre-conventional stage because I didn't care what happened to me, my friends or my reputation. It made me learn quite a bit about myself and I think helped move me to the conventional stage. I was able to see how my actions hurt so many others even though it wasn't a direct consequence.]]> 2021-02-23 18:08:31 UTC https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232898388 8020764 https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232900729 In High school my parents and my teachers both showed an authoritative style as they expected a lot from me however when i got off topic or didnt do the work my parents and teachers would remind me what i have yet to complete.]]> 2021-02-23 18:08:56 UTC https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232900729 8020764 https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232902643 2021-02-23 18:09:17 UTC https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232902643 8020764 https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232909404 Learning about my adoption was hard for me to understand as it would've been for anyone however i came to terms with it eventually and saw it as a driving factor, I thought my biological parents abandoned me leading to a gap in my life for love and belonging but also showing me that even when the most meaningful people in your life aren't right by your side it doesn't mean you can't succeed. (Nature left me broken, but Nuture from my adoptive parents got me through it)

]]> 2021-02-23 18:10:32 UTC https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232909404 8020764 https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232914448 I have really struggled with being adopted for most of my life. Initially, I thought I was abandoned by my birth parents. Both of them have children with other partners and my brother and I were the only children given up. It really hurt thinking that they didn't want me but kept their other children. I was stuck in the Industry vs. Inferiority stage because I felt worthless. Nothing could make me feel better. I was great at sports, but didn't feel good about myself. I was doing well in school but didn't feel good about myself. I was in a loving home, but didn't feel good about myself. This causes to do some very self destructive things. I stopped caring about school. I tried to do anything I could to fit I with the cool kids. I ended up hanging out with some kids who were not very good, but they made me feel good about myself. It took most of my high school career to start feeling better about myself. That corresponds with me realizing that I am in a better place than if I wasn't adopted.]]> 2021-02-23 18:11:27 UTC https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232914448 8020764 https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232917285 Learning about my adoption was hard and for my adoptive parents i could say it was just as hard hard on them as it was on me. telling your child that hes not yours is hard to do so in this situation i feel the style most shown was permissive as within the first weeks they didnt expect a lot as they knew it bothered me but they let me be knowing that eventually id come to terms with it and move on and continue to succeed.]]> 2021-02-23 18:11:57 UTC https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232917285 8020764 https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232919482 its hard to speak in terms of our generation however our generation is all about technology so when i found out i spent three days looking on social media to find out who my real parents were.]]> 2021-02-23 18:12:22 UTC https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232919482 8020764 https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232921663 I think I see myself in the conventional stage foe my work. I don't always like what I am asked to do, but that is part of life. So if I want a job, I might as well deal with the things I don't like.]]> 2021-02-23 18:12:44 UTC https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232921663 8020764 https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232924903 I am definitely in the identity vs. Role confusion stage. I like being me. To me, being is being able to do what I want to when I want to. In the past I can remember telling many people just let me be me. I would also tell them I didn't care about them or anything else because that wasn't the way it was for me. This attitude got me fired from a job because I felt I could take time off whenever I needed it for any reason and my employer didn't like it. Recently, I realized that I need to do what I am asked and not push back even if I don't like it. It is a job and I am expected to to do what I am being asked to do. I feel like I have moved into a place where I understand my role and accept it for what it is. I no longer try to change it!]]> 2021-02-23 18:13:16 UTC https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232924903 8020764 https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232928288 When i got my first job i was excited however i was a little nervous because i knew i wouldnt like the work part of it. Having a job teaches me discipline, and i missed out on that as a kid so im taking advantage of it now. I had no difficulties getting the job however i had difficulty finding the motivation to do my job since it was something i didnt like. I took multiple things away from this, the main lesson being sometimes you have t put up with things you dont want to put up with, its life and the way to success. (Nature told me not to like certain things, but Nurture helped me deal with them)

]]> 2021-02-23 18:13:52 UTC https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232928288 8020764 https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232930403 When it comes to a job and doing your job well i feel bosses become the Authoritative style manly because from my experience when i did something wrong my boss would tell me what i was doing wrong and she/he would tell what to do instead. ]]> 2021-02-23 18:14:15 UTC https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232930403 8020764 https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232932354 Our generation is very lazy we only care about social status and thats it we dont like doing work or getting told what to do so having a job was one of the hardest if not the hardest thing for people in our generation.]]> 2021-02-23 18:14:35 UTC https://padlet.com/8020764/icfslxni6kmokst4/wish/1232932354