https://padlet.com/26msheehy/i9sw6czoiag3 Here, you can give me specific and valuable feedback on all of my writing pieces throughout the year! As you comment, please remember to be kind with your words. However, as you offer "Two Stars and a Wish," constructive criticism is certainly welcome! en-us 2019-12-06 15:09:24 UTC 2021-01-05 14:06:54 UTC hello@padlet.com https://padlet-assets.s3.amazonaws.com/icons/Apple.png 26mksheehy https://padlet.com/26msheehy/i9sw6czoiag3/wish/420861099 2019-12-06 16:50:48 UTC https://padlet.com/26msheehy/i9sw6czoiag3/wish/420861099 26jmccummings https://padlet.com/26msheehy/i9sw6czoiag3/wish/421638127 I love the descriptive details throughout your piece.  It really gives the reader a picture of how stuff looks or what’s going on.  My favorite is when you talk about Izzy getting hot chocolate on her sweatshirt and the smell filling the air. Because that makes me picture when my mom gets us fast food as a treat  and the car just fills with a greasy smell.  And I'm a pretty clumsy person when it comes to eating as well so I could just picture what her sweatshirt looks like.  In addition I also love the message.  People these days are always on their phones which is bad for their health. So this is a good reminder that they should be in an active sport or at least be with their friends in person not on the screen all the time.  In conclusion I do feel like you could express the characters emotions and what’s going on in their head.  To make the reader feel how the character is feeling.  To also  make the story more intense.  But great job on your story and keep up the good work!

]]> 2019-12-09 15:12:52 UTC https://padlet.com/26msheehy/i9sw6czoiag3/wish/421638127 26vslack https://padlet.com/26msheehy/i9sw6czoiag3/wish/422188828 I like how you describe the scene. It makes the reader really want to read because you need a good hook to pull the reader in. For example when you said it was a frigid and frosty day. Another thing I liked was the descriptive word choice and how it digs deeper into the description. One thing that was not so great was how much dialouge you used. In the beginning there was barely any and it might get boring with no one talking.]]> 2019-12-10 14:57:10 UTC https://padlet.com/26msheehy/i9sw6czoiag3/wish/422188828 26eprincipe https://padlet.com/26msheehy/i9sw6czoiag3/wish/1055557927 Hello!! I love your writing piece! My first star would be that it was so described and creates a clear image of the story in the readers head. Another star was how you showed a sense of time in way. You made it clear that you were on stage for an amount of time and your writing showed that. One of my wishes would be to go back and make sure you added commas. But other then that you did a great job!!]]> 2021-01-05 14:06:54 UTC https://padlet.com/26msheehy/i9sw6czoiag3/wish/1055557927