After class, we all went to lotus to buy some stuff we needed. It wasn’t a big plan, just a last minute “Tara , sama ka”. But it turned into something I genuinely enjoyed. We laughed, walked around, and ended up eating together. It felt natural, like we had all known each other longer than we actually had.

Sometimes, you mert people and just….click. No pressure, no pretending, just a good energy. I don’t know where this friendship eill go, but today, I’m just happy it happened. It reminded me that life can surprise you when you least expect it.

Then we remembered 'YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO LEAVE LEFTOVERS' or you get charged. Problem was, we were so full already.

So yeah, we had to get creative. Some of us tried to casually force bites in others were offering food like "Hey, want this?" even though everyone was full too.

In the end, we survived and finished everything. It was honestyly so funny. Super full, but super worth it.

It hurts so bad not just kasi wala na kami, but because I still love him habang nangyayari lahat ng ‘to. May part sa’kin na nagsisisi, like sana hindi ko na lang masyadong dinamdam ‘yung ginawa niya. Pero ang sakit talaga eh, especially ‘yung part na may ibang girl involved. I couldn’t just pretend na okay lang. Kahit mahal na mahal ko pa siya, I had to choose myself. At the end of the convo, I felt so drained. As in, parang naubos ako. Lunod na lunod sa “sana,” sa “mahal pa rin kita,” at sa “paalam.” Everything was so quiet around me, pero ang ingay sa loob. And kahit na paulit-ulit ko sinasabi sa sarili ko na magiging okay rin ako right now, I’m not. I’m really not. Pero maybe, someday I’ll accept it. Not because I want to, but because I have to.

End of chapter na ’to. Nakakaiyak pero nakakakilig din? Weird no? Pero siguro ganun talaga kapag mahal mo pa rin kahit alam mong wala nang babalikan. Trying to be okay. Trying to prepare my heart.

At first, sobrang awkward. Nagkakahiyaan kami, like hindi namin alam paano magsisimula. Pero eventually, he asked me kung kamusta na ako. I told him na I’m doing medyo okay kahit hindi naman talaga buo ‘yung totoo kong nararamdaman.

We talked about school… like old times. Tapos nanghiram ako ng lighter sa staff kasi gusto ko siyang pa-blow ng cake. Sabi ko kakantahan ko pa siya pero hindi ko na kinaya… napaiyak ako. Kaming dalawa. Biglang naging iyakan na lang. Walang harang, walang pride. Sobrang raw ng moment na ‘yun.

He kept saying sorry. Paulit-ulit. Halatang halata sa kanya na sobrang nagsisisi siya. Sinabi niya pa “I love you so much” at damang dama ko ‘yung sincerity… pero masakit eh. Sobrang sakit.

Then he asked, “Mas magiging okay ka ba kung ganito?” as in kung magkabalikan ba kami ulit. Pero hindi ako sumagot. I pretended na hindi ko narinig. Kasi alam kong kahit gusto ko… hindi pa kaya ng puso ko. Masakit pa rin. At kailangan ko munang piliin sarili ko kahit parang hindi ko kaya.

Dapat aalis na siya ng 3:00 pero we extended… hanggang 4:30. Alam kong bitin ‘yun pero grabe… sobrang saya ko kahit sobrang lungkot ko rin. Halo-halo na. And pag-uwi ko? Ayun, iyak ulit.

Then nag-chat pa siya sa’kin after. Hindi ko pa kayang i-process lahat, pero alam ko… this day will be stuck sa puso ko forever.