I’d cancel joy,

laughter,

love, and also

free will.

 

If I were in charge of the world

There would be emptiness,

despair, and

pain.

 

 

If I were in charge of the world

You wouldn’t have good.

You wouldn’t have positivity.

You wouldn’t have friends,

or “I love you.”

You wouldn’t even have emotion.

 

If I were in charge of the world

Burnt charcoal would be a vegetable.

No one will feel any sense of joy

And a person who sometimes

forgot to smile,

And sometimes forgot to fit in with the crowd,

Would still be allowed to be

in charge of the world

Like the one that follows me

And I dream of being unnoticed to many

I am hiding behind you silently

I used to be completely invisible

But now I can be subtly there

I seem to be just another quiet person

But I'm really just not completely seen

I value nothing

I write about everything I hate

I trust no one

I honor nothing I do

I give voice to nobody

I give voice to nothing 

I am very dead inside

I make others unhappy

I hold that with pride

I am completely dead inside

I make everyone miserable

why happiness exists

why others feel joy

why everyone is happier

 

But most of all

why anger exists

why it doesn't control others

why it only picks a certain few

 

What I understand most is

why my temper is so short

why I don't have many friends

why I'm alright with it

I wonder if people really see me

I see how others pass me by

I want to be recognized

I am invisible and forgettable 

 

I pretend like I don't care but,

I feel sad when I'm unseen

I touch others to see if I'm real

I worry that they didn't notice, though

I cry not once

I am invisible and forgettable 

 

I understand that I'm not one to be remembered

I say "It's just high school."

I dream for others to see me in the future

I try to change my hidden ways

I hope I'll be seen one day

I am invisible and forgettable 

And I'm learning to think of others

3 And I'm learning to control my anger

Not to hit , when I'm not happy

And I'm learning not to yell for no reason

And I'm learning not to think before I speak

And I'm learning (though it sometimes really hurts me)

Not to slam a table when I really feel the need

And I'm learning to be a nice person

When I really can't tolerate it

And I'm learning that it's much

Much easier to be angry

I am afraid of loneliness

I am afraid that no one will notice me

I am afraid that they'll walk by unknowingly

I am even afraid of others leaving me

 

I am afraid of failing

I am afraid of not being good enough

I am afraid that others will be better than me

I am afraid that I'll be seen as lesser than

I am even afraid of being second place

 

I want attention

I want recognition

I want to be noticed by all

I want to be loved by all

I even want people to worship me

I want to succeed

I want to be better than others

I want others to envy me

I want others to wish they were me

And I want to be better than all of you

Most of all

But now I use my words

I always got angry

But I never stayed calm

I once settled things physically

But now I fight verbally

If I could stop being angry

I would probably have a slower heart rate

I never got into a real fight

But I might just try

I can't hit(because if I do, I can't walk the line)

But I can yell at others

I won't knock someone's lights out

But I might scream

I used to hit others

But now I use my words