https://padlet.com/anzuresnicaa/fpmh58w4uvmdrwbv Have you ever taken initiative and felt guilty afterwards? (Naranasan mo na bang magkusa at nakonsensya matapos nito?) en-us 2022-10-04 02:46:29 UTC 2022-10-05 01:42:50 UTC hello@padlet.com https://padlet.net/icons/png/1f52e.png https://padlet.com/anzuresnicaa/fpmh58w4uvmdrwbv/wish/2325367155 Kapag may time na walang gustong gumawa ng isang bagay talagang tinatry kong manguna na, kaso minsan nakikitaan un na bilang masamang bagay, siguro part na rin ng crab mentality ng mga pinoy. Kapag groupings noon o kahit anong activity sa labas ng school. Kahit na gusto mo lang namang tumulong, in the end ikaw pa ung nagiging masama, parang ganon. After na nangyari un bigla akong nanahimik tapos kahit na gusto kong maghelp kapag need na talaga, pinipigilan ko ung sarili ko kasi baka kung ano pang masabi ng tao at mamisinterpret ung intention ko.]]> 2022-10-04 09:49:56 UTC https://padlet.com/anzuresnicaa/fpmh58w4uvmdrwbv/wish/2325367155 https://padlet.com/anzuresnicaa/fpmh58w4uvmdrwbv/wish/2325370394
Hi, i'm Jaja!

and i want to share this experience of mine that happened oftentimes. so i came from a broken family, and only my grandparents in my mother's side took the responsibility on raising me since when i was 6 months old. i love my grandparents so much, but i used to say bad words to them, that leads to a point that i cursed them. 

so ako kasi, malaki ang galit ko sa mama ko, malaki ang galit ko kasi hindi niya man lang pinadama sa'kin ang pagmamahal ng tunay na ina. nagagalit ako kasi gusto ko ng pagmamahal niya, nagagalit ako kasi mahal ko siya.

and everytime na nag-aaway kami ni mama, lola ko lagi ang unang nagagalit sa'kin sa tuwing nagkakasagutan kami. madalas niyang sabihin sa'kin ang mga salitang "kahit anong sama ng nanay mo, nanay mo pa rin 'yan!", at "balang araw magiging nanay ka rin, at kakarmahin ka rin sa mga pinagsasasabi mo sa nanay mo!". ayan lagi ang mga walang sawang umiikot sa tainga ko sa tuwing pinapagalitan nila ako. pero isa lang ang palagi kong sagot sa kanila, "kung magiging nanay man ako, hindi ako gagaya sa walang kwentang 'yan!" at sa tuwing nasasabi ko 'yun, sampal palagi ang inaabot ko sa kanila. but who cares? atleast nasabi ko ang saloobin ko. kung totoong nanay siya, bakit hindi ko dama?

pero noong namatay ang lola ko, doon ko na napagtanto ang lahat. mali ako, maling-mali ako na sinasagot ko ang lola ko at inaaway ko siya dahil lang sa gusto niya akong patinuin. nagsisi ako, at hindi ko man lang nasabi sa kanya na mahal na mahal ko siya, kasi mas madalas kaming mag-away kaysa magkaayos.

pagkalibing ng lola ko, nagsorry ako kay mama. sinabi ko at inamin ko lahat ng mga pagkakamali na nagawa ko. sinabi ko rin na mahal na mahal ko siya at gusto ko lang naman ng pagmamahal niya kaya ako nagagalit sa kanya. 

pero...

hindi niya ako pinansin.

natanong ko ang sarili ko...masama ba talaga akong anak?]]> 2022-10-04 09:52:37 UTC https://padlet.com/anzuresnicaa/fpmh58w4uvmdrwbv/wish/2325370394 https://padlet.com/anzuresnicaa/fpmh58w4uvmdrwbv/wish/2325590358
Ahm , Actually nung time na nagkusa ako na tumulong sa ibang tao like malapit sa akin tinutulungan and nagkukusa na talaga ako gawin yung isang bagay na yon para matapos na but in the end mali pa din ako , hindi pa din enough yung binigay ko o yung tinulong ko sa taong yon na kahit ilan beses ako magkusa sakanya still mali pa din yung gagawin ko , kaya nagsisisi ako na kahit gustong-gusto ko tumulong sakanila o sakanya nagpipigil na lang ako na baka mali ulit na kahit panghawakan ko yung salita na " kapag mali , itatama naman " kaso wala e kung tama naman pero mali pa din sakanya wala pa din yan or what , nasa ugali ako ang tumulong pero minsan nakakaguilty kung nagkusa kana wala pa din.]]> 2022-10-04 12:38:41 UTC https://padlet.com/anzuresnicaa/fpmh58w4uvmdrwbv/wish/2325590358 https://padlet.com/anzuresnicaa/fpmh58w4uvmdrwbv/wish/2325592256 tw // suicide


Hola! I’m Cha. I’m 16 years old and I tried to give up my life more than five times. Yes, suicide attempts.

Sa tuwing nakakaramdam ako ng lungkot o kahit anong nakakapag down sa akin, lagi kong iniisip isa lang ang solusyon do’n, ‘yon ang suicide. Pero everytime na maga-attempt ako ay hindi ako natutuluyan at biglang pumapasok sa isip ko ang parents and friends ko. I feel so much guilty tuwing susubukan ko at sila ang nasa isip ko. Napapaisip ako na, “ang unfair ko naman pala. ginawa nila lahat para maging okay ako, para mag stay ako hanggang dulo samantalang ako ay sarili ko lang ang iniisip ko.”. Everytime na maiisip ko yan ay gumagapang ang guilt sa buong sistema ko. Salamat sa mga taong ‘to dahil ngayon ay maayos na ‘ko. I’m 10 months clean and I’m a suicide survivor:))]]> 2022-10-04 12:39:45 UTC https://padlet.com/anzuresnicaa/fpmh58w4uvmdrwbv/wish/2325592256 https://padlet.com/anzuresnicaa/fpmh58w4uvmdrwbv/wish/2325613855 Hii I'm ckret, 16. I have an anxiety at napag daanan ko na ang depression. Sa murang edad marami nang problema ang dumaan at dumadating sa buhay ko. I'm always sad, unmotivated, and i feel like i don'thhave any will to live. Breaking down everyday is like a routine to me. Last school year when i was in 10th Grade, Umatake ang depression ko. Hindi ko rin inakala na mararanasan ko yon sa buhay ko. Dahil nga grade 10, graduating, maraming requirements at mga need gawin, Sumabay pa yung nga problems sa bahay. I had a lot of things in my mind, I'm pressured, tired, halos mablanko na ang utak ko dahil hindi ko na alam ang uunahin at gagawin ko. Masaya ako dahil lahat ng 'yon ay tapos na. Ngayon ay hindi na ako masyadong nag iisip ng kung ano ano dahil wala na akong masyadong problema, pero minsan hindi parin maiwasan. Pero kahit ganon, may mga dapat tayong gawin at tapusin pa sa ating buhay. May mga magagawa pa tayong mga bagay na ikakasaya natin. Sana lahat ng nakakaranas ng ganito ay mahanap ninyo ang kasiyahan at peaceful na life. ]]> 2022-10-04 12:51:15 UTC https://padlet.com/anzuresnicaa/fpmh58w4uvmdrwbv/wish/2325613855 https://padlet.com/anzuresnicaa/fpmh58w4uvmdrwbv/wish/2325647904 Two years ago I had a ex he choose me because there's no once who left with him, then nag kataon I was his side I was his all; But I never feel lovely by him pero Sabi ko baka guniguni ko lang Yun I low-key help him to change even we had an argument I was the one who said sorry first I low my pride, my dignity, my all. (huy not my body ah) after a month, I got tired to help him Sabi ko tama na nakakapagod na guilty ako Kasi hindi naman kailangan ako Ang tumulong sakaniya dapat siya Ang tumulong sa sarili niya dahil hanggat may Isang taong nandiyan para tumulong sakaniya patuloy pa din siya sa daan na gusto niyang lakaran.]]> 2022-10-04 13:09:41 UTC https://padlet.com/anzuresnicaa/fpmh58w4uvmdrwbv/wish/2325647904 https://padlet.com/anzuresnicaa/fpmh58w4uvmdrwbv/wish/2325760454 Sometimes when there's a broken thing in our house, i always initiate na ako na gagawa or i'll try fixing it. But when i initiate to fix it, lalo lang nasira yung gamit💔💔💔. Sorry parents HAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA]]> 2022-10-04 14:01:45 UTC https://padlet.com/anzuresnicaa/fpmh58w4uvmdrwbv/wish/2325760454 https://padlet.com/anzuresnicaa/fpmh58w4uvmdrwbv/wish/2325799833 I hate myself.
I hate myself because I'm a bad son,  Im bad bf, totally I'm  a bad person. I start to hate myself and think I'm a bad son when I was in grade school because I always think that "Why I can't make my mother proud of me?". I became our "class clown" so I can't think any of my problems when I was at school. She's always angry of me because I always go out without asking for her permission. I graduate grade school without getting any achievements.

When I'm in high school, I continued to be a social butterfly or being friendly so I can forget my problems. And Covid-19 happens. I start to hate myself more than i do when I'm in grade school. I start having a breakdowns every single day because of the reasons i think why I'm a bad son and the pressure from schoolworks. But I survive that phase of me. 

Then one time I post a story from my social media account and a girl replied from that story. That's the start of our conversation. 6 months have passed when that girl confessed that she has a feelings for me. That day I recalled my conversation with her and i notice that this girl stays with me through ups and down. Months after that I confess my feelings for her. Months after my confession for her she became my girl. This is the time I start to became a bad bf. I get jealous easily, I over think a lot, but my girl always give me assurance and consistency so I always think that "This girl would be my biggest heartbreak or the girl I will marry".

But now I didn't think too much that I'm a bad son and a bad bf because I had a thought that I always do my best to make them proud of me and if they're not proud of me I don't care anymore atleast I do my best.

]]> 2022-10-04 14:18:53 UTC https://padlet.com/anzuresnicaa/fpmh58w4uvmdrwbv/wish/2325799833 https://padlet.com/anzuresnicaa/fpmh58w4uvmdrwbv/wish/2325802456 way back jhs, madalas mapansin ang leadership skills ko—sa academic organizations man o sa mga groupings kada subject. there were times na kailangan kong bitawan ang ilan sa mga ito dahil di ko na kinaya. nakakahiya man, pero wala eh, wala akong ibang choice. may lesson naman na hatid sakin ang mga experiences ko na ito, yun ay magcommit kung kaya 100% through ups and downs.]]> 2022-10-04 14:20:00 UTC https://padlet.com/anzuresnicaa/fpmh58w4uvmdrwbv/wish/2325802456 https://padlet.com/anzuresnicaa/fpmh58w4uvmdrwbv/wish/2325806039 If i ever did something in my life that i had a guilt after doing it is the time that i was in grade 8 and did a lot of shi that i regret regardless of the consequence that it would make.]]> 2022-10-04 14:21:31 UTC https://padlet.com/anzuresnicaa/fpmh58w4uvmdrwbv/wish/2325806039 https://padlet.com/anzuresnicaa/fpmh58w4uvmdrwbv/wish/2325823277 Its about my dog po that already passed away last year, i love her so much but then this day happend. September 28, 2021 this is day that i decided to take her in a grooming shop kasi i want her to be the beautiful girl she is and para din maginhawaan sya eh nung mga time na yun hindi pa sya complete vaccine and 4months palang sya but still dinala ko padin sya doon and after mag pagroom nakauwi na kami pero malakas padin sya pero pag dating ng gabi she's getting weak and nag vovommit sya ng something idk, dinala namin sya sa vet and sabi nila na my dog has parvovirus the deadly virus so nag overthink ako naiiyak ako kasi kung hindi ko sya dinala don hindi naman nya makukuha yun kasi may mga senior dogs din na andon at iba pang dogs so feel ko nakuha nya yun sa iba. Kung hindi ko minadali at inantay ko muna hanngat sa lumaki sya at lumakas resistensya nya. October 1 in the morning i can't feel her anymore we tried everything I TRIED EVERYTHING in that 3-4 days diko ako natulog mabantayan lang sya kasi mas diko kakayanin na pag gising ko wala na sya. Nung umaga na yun we are on our way again to the vet but she didn't make it she died in my own arms and thats is the worst happened to me in my whole life na guilty ako and been blaming my self for that pero ngayon still on process to accept it kasi alam ko ayun gusto ng dog ko.]]> 2022-10-04 14:29:09 UTC https://padlet.com/anzuresnicaa/fpmh58w4uvmdrwbv/wish/2325823277 https://padlet.com/anzuresnicaa/fpmh58w4uvmdrwbv/wish/2325947828 ang nangyari nga sakin is  yung naghugas ako ng plato tapos nabasag pinagalita tuloy ako ng parents ko. may time pa na may nanghingi ng advice sakin hindi naman ganoon kalala yung problem nya. ang akala ko kasi is nagjojoke lang sya nung sinabi nya yung prob nya and tumatawa din sya non nung sinasabi nya yun kaya buong akala ko talaga ay nagbibiro lang sya then ang ginawa ko is biniro ko din sya tapos pinilosopo ko ng sagot yung tanong nya tapos nagalit sya sakin hahahahahah pero matagal na rin naman yun okey na kami ngayon hahahha



wazuppp sau beh sorry



shotout sayo beh sorry hahahhahah


shotout sayo ]]> 2022-10-04 15:29:56 UTC https://padlet.com/anzuresnicaa/fpmh58w4uvmdrwbv/wish/2325947828 https://padlet.com/anzuresnicaa/fpmh58w4uvmdrwbv/wish/2326013656 Yes araw araw Naranasan ko na mag kusa at pinagsisihan ko ito Alam mo ung feeling na ginagawa mo na lahat para maging mabuti ka sa paningin nila pero Hindi pa din sapat or shall I call it unfair treatment of my parents Hindi lang sa parents ko also in my friends sa parents ko kasi Alam ko na para sa IBA maliit lang na bagay ito pero para sa akin Hindi ung nagkukusa kang magtrabaho sa bahay Tapos kapag may nakita silang Mali ikaw kaagad ang papagalitan at sasaktan sasabihan ng masasaket na salita samantalang ung mas nakakatandang kapatid mo naman ang mag kasalanan pero sayo sa Punta ang Sisi ung feeling na bigla ka nalang sisigawan na Hindi mo Alam Kung ano ang ginawa mong kasalanan 
Ang experience ko naman sa friends ko is yung the way na parang wala na silang  pake Alam sayo pagkatapos mo silang tulungan parang strangers kana at ma fefeel mo out of place kana pala at ito pa ang isa pinaka hate ko sa lahat ung kusa kong binigay ung trust ko sa taong yun kasi nag promise sya in everything etc Tapos malaman laman mo na bago nya pa sabihin sayo ung promise na un eh niloloko ka lang pala nga diba Alam ko not all people can understand what I'm going through at Alam ko para sa iba sasabihin nila maliit lang na bagay yon but for me it's not😢]]> 2022-10-04 16:01:45 UTC https://padlet.com/anzuresnicaa/fpmh58w4uvmdrwbv/wish/2326013656