Let's make it formal! by TEO HUI YING (NIE)

Instructions

teo_hui_ying_2 — 2025-07-20 08:28:45 UTC

Identify 3 sentences in in the example of an informal proposal, which might be too informal.
Consider P.A.C.T and Using the strategies we have learnt,
improve those sentences to be more suitable for a proposal to your principal.

Yushan, Yihan, Ethan , Jairus, Amni

nur_amni_ahmat_jumale1 — 2025-07-22 01:57:28 UTC

Hi principal Tan,

After: Dear Mr Tan,

Love
After: Sincerely
And maybe give us some money
After: we kindly request for funds

2025-07-22 01:57:38 UTC

Before: Can the school help with setting it up and maybe give us some money for the stuff we need?
After: We kindly request for additional funds and assistance to increase student welfare.
Before: Thanks! Love
After: Thank you. Yours sincerely, The Student Council
Before: Hi Principal Tan,

After: Dear Mr Tan,

Adrea, durrah, Lucas, Jasper, laura

2025-07-22 01:57:42 UTC

Hi principal fan (salutations and greetings) = dear principal tan

…. Make students a lot happier (use impact words and abstract nouns) = it would encourage students

Love student council (salutations and greetings) = yours sincerely, the student council

Group 3

yew_shiuan_meng_javern1 — 2025-07-22 01:58:43 UTC

Informal:Hi Principal Tan

Formal:Dear Principal Tan

Informal:Love, The Student Council

Formal: Yours sincerely, The Student Council

Informal: Can the school help with setting it up and maybe give us some money for the stuff we need?

Formal: May we request for assistance in setting up the “chill corner”, as well providing a small amount of budget for the items we require?

Constance, gerald, emily, yiling, jia mei

2025-07-22 01:59:15 UTC

“Hi principal Tan” To “Dear Principal Tan”

“Thanks! Love, the student council” to “I hope you consider our proposal sincerely, the student council”

“It’d be awesome if we could have a chill corner or like a room where students can relax, listen to music, and de-stress.”

“ it would be greatly beneficial for the students to have a relaxation room or corner to help us destress.”

2025-07-22 01:59:36 UTC

Before: hi principle Tom

After: Dear principle Tom

Before: school can be pretty stressful sometimes

After: school may be quite stressful

Before: love,

After: sincerely,

Before:can the school help

ian jethro esha eryna

chan_yee_theng_ian1 — 2025-07-22 02:02:47 UTC

before - It'd be awesome if we could have a chill corner or like a room where students can relax, listen to music and destress

after - It would be a pleasure if you could approve our idea to have a room for students to destress

before - Maybe we can get bean bags, some plants, and a few games?

after - Our plan is to place a few bean bags, some potted plants and possibly a few board games

before - Can the school help with setting it up and maybe give us some money for the stuff we need?

after - Can the school help with setting it up and it would be greatly appreciated if the school could provide us with a budget.

ami, germaine, naz

mohamed_ami_azqif_mohamed1 — 2025-07-23 02:12:55 UTC

before: Hi Principal Tan

after: Dear Principal Tan

before: Love, the student coucil

after: Yours sincerely, the Student Council

before: can the school help with setting it up and maybe give us some money for the stuff we need

after: May we request some help for the preparation and funds for the party