https://padlet.com/hdarken/f9eh53kr0y2n9v5q Reflect on a time when you feel it is necessary to demonstrate ‘professional love’. What could be the possible implications of getting this wrong? en-us 2022-01-29 15:13:32 UTC 2025-11-25 16:46:27 UTC hello@padlet.com b6022096 https://padlet.com/hdarken/f9eh53kr0y2n9v5q/wish/2023494598 I feel it is important to demonstrate professional love when a child is distressed about trauma they have faced in their lives, especially where they have not seen any form of love. It would be necessary to show this professional love to the child as they would feel safe, cared for and like someone is actually listening. I would personally refrain from using touch (hugs) when demonstrating professional love as I feel that can sometimes cross the line between teacher and friend. However, if the child asked for a hug, I would then feel comfortable to do this.

I understand the difficulty of using this approach and why some people may be reluctant to it as it may effect how other children see you, they may think you like the other children more and become jealous or upset. It is also tough to know when to draw the line and not express too much 'love' to the child. However, in my setting, it is very necessary as long as it is used in the correct way and the child is comfortable with it.]]> 2022-02-01 14:55:04 UTC https://padlet.com/hdarken/f9eh53kr0y2n9v5q/wish/2023494598 c1052232 https://padlet.com/hdarken/f9eh53kr0y2n9v5q/wish/2025402453 Within my setting I have found that when a child hurts themselves (I'm thinking of one pupil in particular) they always want some loving support. They approach you trying to hug you, I think this is because this is what happens at home when someone is hurt. They get a hug 'to make things better'. Providing the child with a hug when they ask for one can make them feel safe, settled and can reassure them that they are ok. 

However in my setting we have a side hug policy, so we are encouraged to never hug a child head on only from the side. This is to protect staff from any accusations which could be thrown at them. However the child I am thinking about doesn't really get the feedback she needs from a side hug. As she will still try to give you ' a proper hug'. 
Another barrier to this is when working with pupils with SEN, they don't always understand what classed an inappropriate. They struggle to understand that the relationship they have with their parents is different to the relationship they have with us. So we do get pupils who try to kiss us for example and we have to remind them 'kisses for mummy or kisses for at home'. Staff always have to be very mindful in my setting as we work with vulnerable pupils who don't always understand person space.]]> 2022-02-02 14:01:40 UTC https://padlet.com/hdarken/f9eh53kr0y2n9v5q/wish/2025402453 Gen_S https://padlet.com/hdarken/f9eh53kr0y2n9v5q/wish/2025556841 I think there is a fine line to professional love and that this line varies in degrees depending on the setting.
As a parent I want my children to go to a school that have caring, kind, considerate staff who would treat my children as they would their own whether it be a hug, kind word or a hand hold however would not feel comfortable with them saying they loved my child.
As a member of schooling staff, I try to treat every child with consideration, respect and in a caring manner. I would never not hold a child's hand that needed reassurance, give them a hug when they expressed they needed it etc. However, I would not feel right in telling a child I loved them personally, I say I love how respectful you were, I loved how kind you are, i love the work you have done. But this may be because the setting I work in, is placed in a 'well-off' area with a very low number of child/parent separation or unstable home life. 
My 1:1 child often gives hugs and I return them willing as he is non-verbal so it is his way to communicate with me. ]]> 2022-02-02 15:03:19 UTC https://padlet.com/hdarken/f9eh53kr0y2n9v5q/wish/2025556841 Tiffany_Hadman https://padlet.com/hdarken/f9eh53kr0y2n9v5q/wish/2026201762 I found this report interesting to read to recognize a viewpoint from parents as I have no children of my own so have not considered this before. Within my setting we have many children who have an unstable home life and I think demonstrating professional love is necessary for a sense a safe, comfortable and reassuring place. However I also think it is important to distinguish the professional love and care a practitioner should provide and the care they should receive at home. In my setting practitioners do not hesitate to 'hold a hand' or 'give a hug' and therefore this has something I have always felt comfortable doing although with some boundaries in place for example, only when a child wants a hug or helping hand and if a child says i love you to reply with "I love that you're so kind" or "I love that i get to teach you".

A barrier to this is the children that do not want "physical touch" may think that children who do are favored and this may lead to them becoming jealous or dis heartened. Another implication of getting this wrong is if a parent is not comfortable with this and not addressed to all staff iit could lead to a negative relationship with that parent and school.]]> 2022-02-02 19:54:55 UTC https://padlet.com/hdarken/f9eh53kr0y2n9v5q/wish/2026201762 https://padlet.com/hdarken/f9eh53kr0y2n9v5q/wish/2030068404 I think it is important for children to feel safe and cared for at school.
Many children have difficult home lives and do not always receive the love and support that they need at home. Some children only have the school staff to show them 'love'. 

However, sometimes children can suffer so much with attachment that the relationship that they have could become unhealthy and overwhelming. During a time in my own practice, a child relied on me so much for comfort that he needed to be with me constantly throughout the whole day. This situation became very overwhelming for myself and if I was off or was covering elsewhere then the child became highly distressed. ]]> 2022-02-04 19:46:54 UTC https://padlet.com/hdarken/f9eh53kr0y2n9v5q/wish/2030068404 georgiascott89 https://padlet.com/hdarken/f9eh53kr0y2n9v5q/wish/2030507942 Professional love is something that is not discussed within my setting, it is assumed that we as practitioners are able to make an informed choice as to what is appropriate and what is not. Whilst this places a lot of trust on us it also leaves the school quite open if there were ever to be an inappropriate use of professional love. 
An instance I think of when we talk about professional love is when I work with one of the boys in my class who was non-verbal before joining our school last year. Since then his language use has flourished and he has been using so many words to communicate with us. However when he completes work he shows it to me and i express how proud i am of him, after this he then rubs his face onto my arm( almost like a cat!), here I can't distinguish whether he is fulfilling a sensory need or asking for a hug. He also loves to write all his thoughts down on his work, often this includes subjects like asda and fast food chains, however recently he has been writing "I love Miss Scott", in response to this i like to say to him that i love his effort and how much care he has put into his work. ]]> 2022-02-05 09:18:25 UTC https://padlet.com/hdarken/f9eh53kr0y2n9v5q/wish/2030507942 c1044108 https://padlet.com/hdarken/f9eh53kr0y2n9v5q/wish/2042283039 As a practitioner I always feel comfortable to give a hug or hold a hand if a child is upset. There are certain children within my setting who immediately run to you and give you hugs in a morning, especially those children in our nurture provision. I believe you can still  provide affection and support but still have boundaries.

I think its important for a child to have that affection and care provided at school. It's what I would want for my two children should they have a time when they needed it. 

 I wouldn't be comfortable with saying I loved them but happy to say I care about them.

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