At the core of 'on having an outside' lies a duality, can you have an outside without an inside? This friction between the inside and outside and the internal and external are themes I plan to explore in my FMP. 

I am interested in using textiles within my art work. As a medium textiles has a long association with women and domesticity, both of which are areas I hope to consider. Mark making has also become an important and expressive tool for me and I hope to use this as a way of exploring the conflict within the project brief.

The idea of motherhood and the self have emerged as significant themes from which I can explore the idea of having an outside. Children can be both internal to you but also external, they are both part of you and outside of you, both part of your identity but with their own identity. 

As part of the brief I looked at the work of a number of artists, key to my FMP was the work of Cecilia Vicuña. A Chilean born artist she uses textiles to explore ideas of language, memory and politics. Her pieces are often abstract, using colour and form to tap into larger themes, in an interview with Vicuña she states 'I am nothing and nothingness is truly the best condition that we as humans have. We can be poems, plants, animals, rocks, we can be anything.'(1) I found the idea of deconstructing the self to the point of nothingness, but seeing this as a positive, inspiring. Through this deconstruction can come enlightenment.

Through the course of my FMP I have been able to see the impact the past year has had on my personal practice. Key for me, has been the encouragement from tutors to experiment and accept failure as a critical part of the learning process. During the final project I planned to create two pieces of work that were in dialogue with each other; one a textiles based self-portrait the other a painted still-life. However, I have struggled to make the two pieces work together, and currently the initial concept feels slightly forced. However, due to the exploratory nature of the course this no longer disheartens me and instead has become a problem/challenge that I am excited to keep working on. Having been exposed to a range of techniques I now feel able to explore a variety of mediums to help me solve the disconnect. I have moved away from the painted picture and am trying to created a 'painted' textile piece.

Reflecting on the output from my FMP, I am happy with how 'Motherhood, a self-portrait' has developed. The piece works on a number of levels, through its abstract nature, it is an expression of my internal relationship with motherhood, the yarn representing the bond between mother and child, the constricting but also binding nature of this relationship, the struggle and the joy of motherhood. The reflective aspect of the acrylic allows for a literal self-portrait of the viewer, however, due to the yarn this portrait will always be fragmented, representing the breaking and rebuilding of oneself through motherhood. There were a few technical difficulties with this piece, the acrylic I chose was too thin and hard to work with, I would also like to experiment with curved corners so the shape isn't so harsh and I would like to find a way to better photograph my work so it gives a clearer sense of the 3D nature of the piece.

Over the next year I would like to develop the techniques I have learnt such as painting, print making and textiles. I also plan to continue building on the themes I have addressed in the FMP, expanding the idea of wrapping and also including a performative element to the work. I hope by doing this I will be able to build on developing an artistic voice alongside compiling a portfolio with which I can apply for a fine art masters.

(1) Cecilia Vicuña: The Colour of Compassion, in conversation with Daniel Borzutzky San Francisco, 31 March 2021 [online] available at https://ocula.com/magazine/conversations/cecilia-vicuna/ [Accessed 20 December 2021]

Bibliography 

Online
Guardian Rachel Jones, 24: ‘Trying to second-guess what other people want is a recipe for disaster’ [online] interview https://www.theguardian.com/artanddesign/2015/nov/15/rachel-jones-interview-there-was-nothing-else-i-was-good-at [Acessed 28 November 2021]

Ocula 'Cecilia Vicuña: The Colour of Compassion', in conversation with Daniel Borzutzky San Francisco, 31 March 2021 [online] available at https://ocula.com/magazine/conversations/cecilia-vicuna/ [Accessed 20 December 2021]

Studio International 'Clare Woods – interview: ‘Fragility and vulnerability have always been with me in my work’ an interview with David Trigg 25 May 2021 [online] https://www.studiointernational.com/index.php/clare-woods-interview-great-unknown-cristea-roberts-gallery-london [Accessed 6 December 2021]

Tate 'Cecilia Vicuña' [online] available at https://www.tate.org.uk/art/artists/cecilia-vicuna-21412 [Accessed 1 December 2021]

You tube 'Cecilia Viuna:Hugo Boss Prize 2020 Nominee'[online] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cL_7MDuT8Xk [Accessed 1 December 2021]

You tube 'John Bergman 'Ways of Seeing' [online] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0pDE4VX_9Kk [Accessed 28 November 2021]

Books
Flower: Exploring the World in Bloom, Phaidon press, London, 2020

Nature Morte: Contemporary artists reinvigorate the Still-life tradition, Michael Petry, Thames & Hudson Ltd, London, 2013

Oscar Murillo: By Means of a Detour, Kettle's Yard, Cambridge, 2021

Vitamin T: Threads & Textiles in Contemporary Art 'Cecilia Vicuña', Phaidon Press, London 2019

Exhibitions
'Mixing it Up' Hayward Gallery, Southbank, London, 2021