Essay critique by

Intro/Thesis

2024-03-27 18:22:08 UTC

its all one sentence
no defined thesis: Based on the frequency of vehicle incidents involving the geriatric community, a maximum age limit is required to enhance overall road
safety for all drivers.
doesn't specify topic
title doesn't match intro
no parenthetical citation for statistic
no indent
too wordy/too many commas
rating - 4/10

Format 6/10

2024-03-27 18:27:16 UTC

Good: Has correct # of paragraphs, pages are numbered, double spaced

Bad: Missing paragraph/references indentations, missing class name/number, teachers name, and college name

Better luck next time!

References

2024-03-27 18:27:52 UTC

6/10 The good part of this is that they cited both in the essay and at the end, and that they wrote all the parts of the citation. The bad part is that the citations are not in APA format and the spacing is off, which makes it harder to read.

Body Paragraph #3

2024-03-27 18:32:05 UTC

Rate - 7/10

There is suppose to be a comma between Cobb and 1998 for the in-text citation.
We also don’t know who Cobb is.
There is no citation for the information about there being 200,00 geriatric people.
There is no indentation for the paragraph.

Great transition words
The main idea of the paragraph is clear
Good Format

Essay 1&2 7/10

2024-03-27 18:34:25 UTC

Something We change about this is the way you Introduce authors that you cite , introducing the title of the paragraph extends the sentence so you could introduce who the person you’re actually citing is , what’s their occupation etc and then cite them at the end.

Something We like about these paragraphs

is how every claim made does have sources that back them up , the second paragraph goes more into supporting details. While they could be shortened it’s still made clear what exactly they’re citating.

Conclusion 8.3/10

tuncerenl — 2024-03-27 19:28:49 UTC

Conclusion could be shorter

Outweighs should be Outweigh

Some sentences seem to be redundant (Not sure, I'm not the greatest at writing)