(2) I wonder what messaging abt school is being sent to the kids if they r allowed to be absent w/o VR.  (messaging). How will this message affect your future efforts at getting them back to school? (Present vs Future)

(3) I wonder how the current method of keeping them safe is going to work when friends become increasingly more important in their lives. (Parent needs vs  child needs)  What would be a better way to address your concerns of safety for your kids? (Reality vs Ideal)

(4) What do you think of your method of exchanging school for compliance? (Self awareness) 

(2)   “Emotional needs is not just about being happy”. What is your view? (Self-awareness)

(3)   I can see you are being a good parent by giving her the best and protecting her from negative experiences.  I wonder who will do that for her when she grows up and u are no longer around? (Present vs future).  

(4)   Having known only happiness, how do you think your child will manage when she experienced negative emotions and failures in the future (Present vs future)

(2)   While your current parenting is guided by the need to make amends to the kids, supporting them in education is a gift you can contribute to their  future in the long-run? What do you think? (Actual and Ideal self)

(3)   While making amends, what other consideration do u need to think about to prevent making future mistake's in your kids life? (Self-awareness)

(4)   If you were your best possible self as a parent, how would you balance between building bonds with your kids and attend to their learning needs at the same time? (Actual vs Ideal self)

(2)   What will your future self say about how you are parenting now? (Actual and Ideal self)

(3)   If u had your way, what would you be doing or do differently? (Actual and Ideal self)

(4)   How would your child grow up without the guidance and leadership from you? (Self-awareness)

Bring to consciousness (a) what parent did / how they acted (b) purpose of action: hope or try to achieve with the action (c) What message was sent with that action (d) impact of the actions on the child

-How does this beh help?
-How does this beh hurt you?
-Is the beh getting you what u want?
-What made you choose to do that? 
-Do what u mean and mean what u do
-Are u doing what u want or what you child wants?
-What is it about your behave that cause you child to behave this way?

-What do you think about what u did
-What was going through your mind when you……
-How would you rate the way you manage the situation? 

-How did it impact you emotionally when…
-What were you feeling when…….
-What was it like emotionally to …..
-What emotions got you to react the way you did?

-I want my child to see me as…….
-If someone ask your child to describe you as a parent, what would you want them to say? (This is different from what do u think the kids will say: see below pt 7.  The difference is in the intent of the question)

5. inner conflicts (For example, between your beliefs and actions)

-If you were your best possible self as a parent, how would you respond to the same situation?
-What will your future self say about how you are parenting now?

-What will you start / stop / keep in your parenting?
-What kind of parent did you want to be when u found out your were pregnant for the first time?
-Parenting is about ………
-What makes a resilient child?

-What will your kids say about you if ask what they thought of you as a parent?
-What are some reaction (verbal, non-verbal) do you get from your kids when you…….
-How will your kids score you on……..
-How is it that your child reacted…….When you…….