Jocelyn Castellanos' Blog by Jocelyn Castellanos https://padlet.com/jocastellanos1/d3tuc7hxfd45y95m English 1010 en-us 2021-01-29 03:47:32 UTC 2023-04-21 15:58:17 UTC hello@padlet.com https://padlet.net/icons/png/1f431.png Introduction jocastellanos1 https://padlet.com/jocastellanos1/d3tuc7hxfd45y95m/wish/1139362350 Hello everyone, 
My name is Jocelyn Castellanos and I am a Psychology major. This is my second semester at CSU Stanislaus after having previously transferred from the University of the Pacific. My career goals have definitely changed a lot from when I was younger but the root of it all has never changed. I have always felt that my true calling in life was to help others and to be someone's safe space in a way, so with that being said, as a Psychology major I am hoping to be able to pursue my Masters in Social Work down the road. I also dream of adopting many, many, many cats as I have deemed myself a "crazy cat lady" after adopting my cat, Baby, 2 years ago. Being a full-time student and juggling a full-time job on top of that has been rather difficult but in the past 3 months or so, I have taken up couponing which has embarrassingly enough become my favorite past time and I feel like you rarely hear that coming from a 21 year old but oh well. I look forward to this class as well as meeting all of you! (: 
- Jocelyn ]]> 2021-01-29 03:58:24 UTC https://padlet.com/jocastellanos1/d3tuc7hxfd45y95m/wish/1139362350 Jerome/Geronimo/Omar/Umar jocastellanos1 https://padlet.com/jocastellanos1/d3tuc7hxfd45y95m/wish/1195313290 In just the first 153 pages of The Last Poets, Omar has left a mark on me and it is such an unexplainable feeling to see parts of your own life be parts of a character who is nothing like you in the big scheme of things. As a protagonist, Omar has allowed us to see a glimpse of his life thus far through a first person limited point of view through his own eyes. So far the story has only been told through the eyes of Omar which allows us to hear about the actions of others but not really about what their thought process is besides that of Omar himself. Very early on in the book we see that his life starts off very rough and we find out within the first chapter that he is unable to speak and because of this he is given a hard time especially from his paternal grandmother whom he lives with. Growing up my younger brother suffered from selective mutism which is defined as a “complex childhood anxiety disorder characterized by a child’s inability to speak and communicate effectively in select social settings, such as school”. And although my brother spoke at home, he did in fact suffer a lot in school because of selective mutism. Having seen my brother’s own experience with not speaking I can only imagine how hard it was for Omar. After finding his voice we follow Omar as he grows and goes through so many changes in his life, we see him grow from a child who cannot speak to a man who is poetically talented. He has proved time after time that he is a dynamic and round character as he has taken on so many challenges in his life and preserved through them only to keep bettering himself every single time. What really shocked and broke me was the scene where Omar went to Roxy’s to shine shoes but instead ran into Carla who was much older than him. After talking for a bit, Carla calls him over and makes him give her oral sex. Omar was so young and this was his first sexual experience so it was extremely heartbreaking to read about his innocence being taken away in an instant especially because young black men constantly have to grow up faster than their peers. This particular event and so many more, show us just how fast Omar had to grow up. Unfortunately enough, Omar also has an absent father who is rather abusive to his mother and he grows up not only hearing the abuse but also seeing it. And although he does his best to protect his mother, his mother repeatedly asks him to not get in the middle of it. I imagine that such experiences cannot be healthy especially for such a young and impressionable child and can truly “make or break” someone when choosing their own path in life. And although his life has not been an easy one so far, Omar has come a long way in these past 153 pages. 

*I have included a picture of Umar Bin Hassan to add a face to Omar* 
]]> 2021-02-12 04:44:12 UTC https://padlet.com/jocastellanos1/d3tuc7hxfd45y95m/wish/1195313290 Setting & Conflict within The Last Poets... jocastellanos1 https://padlet.com/jocastellanos1/d3tuc7hxfd45y95m/wish/1244292977    Setting is defined as the place or type of surroundings where something is positioned or where an event takes place. But personally, I believe that setting is much deeper than that. With every different setting possible, we are able to see an array of differences in social, cultural, and economical dynamics. Our setting can really shape us or ultimately break us and this thought can be scary but unfortunately is not far from the truth.
   For all 21 years of my life I have lived in Tracy, California and to make matters worse I have spent the last 4 years of my life working at a warehouse in the same city. I wake up everyday just to realize that I have the same routine week in and week out which is just as horrible as it sounds, if not more. In the past 2 years I have started to dread it to the point that I feel trapped and as if I will never be able to escape from it. I know I can do so much better for myself but since this is all I have known for a while, I feel like I cannot move past this stage of my life no matter how much it drags me down. 
   For the past year and a half, I have started so many new job applications just to end up deleting them all because of my own fear in change. I finally decided that enough is enough and started actually completing and submitting applications and so far I have had so many call backs and interviews which have allowed me to have some hope for my future that I truly believed I would not have especially not with living in the same town I grew up in. 
I cannot help but think that just like me, Felipe has felt stuck in life many times due to the settings that surrounded him. With him having lived in both, New York and California we get the sense that both of these places have a different effect on Felipe which makes him confused as to which version of him is the "real" him because there is a noticeable change in his personality and overall being when he is in either New York or California. Ultimately, Felipe's own conflict with himself is realizing and understanding who he truly is deep inside, settings aside. But because his settings play a huge part in his personality when he is at each of these different places, it is difficult to understand which parts of him is who he truly is. ]]> 2021-02-26 07:29:33 UTC https://padlet.com/jocastellanos1/d3tuc7hxfd45y95m/wish/1244292977 Theme within The Last Poets jocastellanos1 https://padlet.com/jocastellanos1/d3tuc7hxfd45y95m/wish/1305002412    The Last Poets by Christine Otten is such an incredible and truly eye opening story that holds the ability to teach us all a bit about life and the struggles that come along with it. Although the story has many different themes that could be seen along the way, one of the most prominent ones is that of pushing through even when it seems like the whole world is against you and that goes hand in hand with the idea that your environment has the ability can affect your life whether it is positively or negatively.
   Two characters that can attest to this topic are Jerome and Felipe who have both come from rather hard backgrounds which affected their lives tremendously in one way or another. As readers, we saw them both respectively not only go through unimaginable situations but also witnessed them not allow their environment to completely break them as they fought through to be on top and better the situation they were placed in.
   The Last Poets first introduces us to Jerome whose life started off rather harshly as he had a speech impediment and was looked down upon because of this by his paternal grandmother, his father was constantly not present in his life and when he was he was abusive, and Jerome had to grow up too fast too soon because of his environment. And even though all this would have broken a person, Jerome did not allow it to get to him and did everything in his power to get out of those situations and fight for a chance at a better life and environment. 
   Felipe is another character whose environment affected his life and almost broke him. Although Felipe was a young intelligent man, he fell into some trouble which caused him to end up in a few correctional facilities before ending up at the Coxsackie Correctional Facility which was his last stop before being released. Inside of the facility, Felipe did his best to stay away from trouble as it was not the life that he wanted for himself and was even let out early with the conditions of enrolling  in college, which he did. Although his young life started off roughly with all the trouble he found himself in, Felipe had a loving family and this pushed him to be and do better for himself. 
   Although both Jerome and Felipe had some troubles in their lives due to their environments, some worse than the others, they both proved just how much stronger they were than the lives that were given to them and they constantly pushed through to do better and not fall into the trap of what their environment had to offer to them negatively. Such stories like these help to remind us that we are more than the situations we are born into and that we are not "stuck" and can in fact move forward and live out our dreams of a better life. 

*I feel like the quote attached applies heavily to both Jerome and Felipe as they did not allow their obstacles to get in the way of their success and ability to keep going and push through*]]> 2021-03-13 08:09:51 UTC https://padlet.com/jocastellanos1/d3tuc7hxfd45y95m/wish/1305002412 Good Kid, M.A.A.D City jocastellanos1 https://padlet.com/jocastellanos1/d3tuc7hxfd45y95m/wish/1380393309    The Hero's Journey is a concept commonly found in stories a in which a character ventures into unknown territory to retrieve something they need. Facing conflict and adversity, the hero ultimately triumphs before returning home, transformed. Kendrick Lamar really embodied the significance of the hero's journey through his project, Good Kid, M.A.A.D City. Growing up I went through many different phases which included a variety of music and artists as I navigated life trying to find out who I was. I stumbled upon Kendrick Lamar through his song, Swimming Pools(Drank)in 2012 when I was 10 years old and although I did not understand the meaning of the song, it would always be on repeat. Today, I wish I had been old enough to truly appreciate this album and its significance when it was released. Now at nearly 22 years old, I finally got the chance to not only listen to the album in its entirety but also read through it and truly understand it which only makes me appreciate Kendrick Lamar as an artist even more. Throughout the album, Kendrick narrates his life out for us and we are able to take a look at just what and how much he went through starting from a young age. He shares with us his struggles and his triumphs as well. Like with any other hero's journey, Kendrick encounters challenges in life which for him include growing up in a city full of crime, falling into peer pressure and bad influences, and the reality of gangs and drugs especially in disadvantaged and underfunded communities. And although he underwent all these challenges at a young age, Kendrick's need to succeed and be better than his environment led him on his journey to "transform" and be more. It is incredible to see just how far he has come considering that Kendrick Lamar is now considered one of the most influential artists as well as one of the greatest rappers and lyricists. Kendrick Lamar is truly the embodiment of the hero's journey. ]]> 2021-04-04 07:22:07 UTC https://padlet.com/jocastellanos1/d3tuc7hxfd45y95m/wish/1380393309 Poetry jocastellanos1 https://padlet.com/jocastellanos1/d3tuc7hxfd45y95m/wish/1454049681   Globally, it is estimated that more than 264 million people of all ages suffer from depression. Because of this, I have decided to focus my blog post on the poems listed under the theme of Depression. 
  The first song I am analyzing is "We Ball" by Meek Mill. In this song, Meek Mill talks about loss which includes the deaths of his friends through violence. Meek Mill experienced a great deal of deaths and loss and although he has left that environment and now owns expensive things such as cars and designer clothes the deaths of his friends will always stick with him. This song helps show that no matter how well you are doing, you still carry pain around with you that does not heal. Meek Mill is still suffering from within as the day that he lost his friends. 
  The second song that caught my attention was that of "I Feel Like Dying" by Lil Wayne. I must admit that the title was what truly caught my attention because of how out there it seems to be. The phrase "I feel like dying" is a very strong one which is full of emotions and one that makes me wonder what is going on that will push a person to the point of feeling that way. In this song, Lil Wayne talks about the high that drugs bring him. He describes different ways in which he feels when he's high but the one thing that they all have in common is that he's happy. But when the high fades, that happiness fades as well and a new feeling takes over. Without the drugs, Lil Wayne explains that he wants to die. This songs shows us that emotions run deep and you can only hide them for so long until you no longer can. Although Lil Wayne is speaking about drugs, I believe that we all have something that gives us a "high" in order to mask our emotions. 
  The last song was "All Falls Down" by Kanye West. I grew up listening to this song and I still play it from time to time. In this particular song, Kanye West speaks about many people including himself and the need to "impress" even if you are not happy. The one line that I relate to and will always sing loudly when the song comes on is "She has no idea what she's doing in college. That major that she majored in don't make no money. But she won't drop out, her parents will look at her funny". Kanye West also talks about how he wears different designer brands to impress those around him when in reality this is not who he is and he does not feel comfortable with the role he plays. This is a reality for many of us who fear being judged for who we are so instead we make those around us happy even if we ourselves are unhappy. 
  All of these songs help demonstrate just how powerful poems can be when telling a story. Some of these songs have lines that rhyme as well as lines that do not but this does not take away from the meanings that they hold. It was interesting to see the many ways in which the theme of depression plays out among the different songs and how universal pain and sadness can be within the settings that it is found in. 
The picture I included is a representation of what depression feels like.
 


]]> 2021-04-24 02:34:09 UTC https://padlet.com/jocastellanos1/d3tuc7hxfd45y95m/wish/1454049681 mescoto11 https://padlet.com/jocastellanos1/d3tuc7hxfd45y95m/wish/1471470449 2021-04-29 00:01:09 UTC https://padlet.com/jocastellanos1/d3tuc7hxfd45y95m/wish/1471470449