I would like to express my deepest gratitude, first of all, for Eya's unwavering kindness and patience. She has been the epitome of a perfect girlfriend to me, always there with me and supports me 100%. Her understanding to my current situation touched my heart in ways I can't put into words; moreover I am not someone who's good with words, quite the opposite even. I am truly blessed by her presence on my side, even if it was for a little while.

The first time Eya ever texted me, I was super ecstatic. How can someone's mannerism makes them so, so gorgeous and loving? I hadn't knew Eya for even a day, and I've bet that she was—and proven—my days' highlight. She's like the stars I admire endlessly, she shines brightly, it's almost blinding to look at her for a second too long. She brought joy into my life, God, I think she even brought back motivation and inspiration to write. Subsequently, I started writing again—for her, the muse I adore; the angel I repent for. Angel is such a fitting nickname, perhaps angel is what she is; her love and care alone have the power to brighten up my darkened days. What do you call that if not an angel's work?

Eya possesses an irresistible charm and captivating presence. Her adorable demeanor feels natural, like she's just born for it. Her being talkative and bubbly is also something I adore for I am, by no means, a man for word. She explains things so well and excitedly. She's just... perfect? Tell me, Eya, how can someone who has a charm of a playful kitten also has a charm of a loving, graceful princess? When Eya spoke to me, it felt as if I'm being bewitched to stay still and admire her. The way she expressed herself so well, the enthusiasm in her text tone, the genuine interest in every topic. She has a power to melt even the coldest heart, I reckon. Her every word—every action filled with nothing but sweetness. And maybe because we are using Miyamura and Hori as our profile pictures that it invoked something in me to keep her safe at all cost. 

Delicate and graceful, Eya's golden hands that move with elegance, making everything is so easy. Including making little gifts I now hang on the door to my room, just so I can be reminded how much luck I bet to get them. In boyfriend's day, which I did not know was a thing—nor think it was important, she gave me something that made me believe the power of love. Waking up to such gift made endorphins rushed to every fiber of my being. I was truly... happy. I would like to say sorry for the lack of appreciation. I loved them too much I did not know what to say.

I don't mind repeating a boring word such as "gratitude" because it's the only thing I felt towards her. For every moment that we spent together. I bid Eya my apology, again, for disappearing so suddenly. I had a valid reason, but I still think how unfair it must've been for her. If I could do anything to enlighten Eya's worry, I would. I will cherish every single memories we have created, Eya. I do not regret a single thing.

I wish you all the best and luck. Please look after yourself well and continue being the sunshine that you are; your warmth will remain in me forevermore. As long as I can, I will always remember you. Even when I've forgotten about you—about us, in retrospect you are nothing, but my happiness.

My guiding star,

I will forever bewitched by you.

Our moment definitely makes me want to see you again in the future. So, maybe this isn’t a goodbye, but rather the beginning of many more meetings to come(?) Let’s think of it that way heheh =) Until then, please take care of yourself, stay happy, and know that I’ll be looking forward to the day we meet again. 🤍

You're also a very very good listener and supporter! I love the way you support me after telling you my days, rasanya beneran disiram afeksi banget, pacaran sama yang older itu memang senyaman ini ya. No drama, always understanding each other, the best supporter i've ever had. I love the way you called me 'dd sayang', diumur ku yang sekarang, memang dd lah panggilan yang sering aku dapet dari orang orang, but it feels different when you're called me that. Like? No, i love it, kamu juga kalo kasih kabar rinci bangett, that makes me feel like i'm really important person.

From the first time I saw you, I felt like shouting to the world just how beautiful you are. I waited for the day we’d finally meet, and when it happened, I can’t even describe how happy I was. Every time I see your name pop up in my sea of notifications, there’s this spark of joy, like something I’ve been waiting for all day is finally here. There’s excitement in your messages, in the way you call me by those cute little nicknames, and yet there’s also this quiet sadness whenever it’s time for us to say goodbye. Still, I’m so grateful. You’ve treated me like I was really yours, and I never felt like there was any awkwardness between us. You made everything so easy, so comforting. It really felt like… Maybe you’re the one I’ve been searching for all this time. Maybe it’s a bit much to say I like you in that way, but honestly, I don’t know what other word could describe what I’m feeling.

When I’m with you, all the exhaustion I carry just melts away. It feels like I have someone waiting for me to come home, someone who’ll listen to everything I have to say. When I’m with you, even the bad things I go through feel light as if they just pass like wind. You’ve somehow become this… Painkiller I never knew I needed. Everything feels easier when I’m talking to you. I’m seriously so thankful that you were the one beside me during my rough days this week, Miong.

And I never imagined you’d be this adorable. My first impression of you was that you were kind of distant, maybe even cold. I even told a friend that I wasn’t sure if we’d vibe well. But clearly, I was wrong. You matched my energy in ways I didn’t expect. Whether it’s your personality or just your natural way of being, it felt like we just clicked. You made it so easy for me to talk about all kinds of things. Even though I’m not someone who opens up too easily, you never crossed any of my boundaries. You respected my pace, you never pushed, and that alone meant so much to me. You made me feel so comfortable, like you truly got me. Our chats never tired me out, no matter how long they were. It was the opposite, I enjoyed every moment. Time didn’t fly fast, but I didn’t mind. I loved the long hours we had because it meant I got to know more about you, talk more deeply, and just be with you.

You’re so good at understanding people. Seriously, I feel like I should be asking a priest how I managed to meet someone like you, because I really do feel lucky. I genuinely had the best time with you. None of our conversations were boring, and I kept smiling and laughing every time I read your messages. I was always looking forward to your notifications popping up. And I really, really hope you enjoyed our time too. The last thing I want is for my presence to feel like a burden to you.

Also… Why are you this kind? Seriously. Everything I wanted, you gave without hesitation. You even took the initiative—whether it was starting conversations or just making sure I felt included. The people who get to meet you are so lucky. There’s no way they’d ever regret having you in their life. I know I don’t, because I’m one of them.

Looking back on these past few days, the whole experience with you has just been… Wow. You’ve been amazing. Not once did I feel any regret about choosing you. In fact, you made me feel like, “Damn… do I want to actually date this person for real?” Yeah, I sound totally desperate right now, but I’m being honest, there’s something about you that makes it so hard to let go. You even gave me three extra days, more than the originally planned. I’m so thankful, but at the same time, I feel a little bad. You cleared out that much time just for me. I also feel guilty about how busy I was the past two days, and how I ended up falling asleep before we could talk at night. Maybe you weren’t waiting for me, but I still feel bad for disappearing like that. If I could choose, I’d honestly rather spend time with you than go to work. Being with you just feels so, beautiful. Every effort you made, every little thing you did it made me feel incredibly lucky to know you, even if we met this way, even if it was just for a short while. And I really hope you don’t regret doing any of that for me.

I don’t know how else to say this, but thank you for being so good to me, Miong. Words can’t even explain just how kind you are. It might sound dramatic, but I almost want to gatekeep you. Because really, someone as good as you? I’d hate to share that with the world. And as for a rating… I don’t even know where to start. All I can say is: 5 out of 5. If a five-star hotel turned into a person, I swear you’d be that person. I truly wish for your happiness and good health always, so that we can meet again someday. And more than that, I hope you’ll always be the same person I know now. You’ve done such a good job, really. Thank you so, so much.

Ayudisha, terimakasih sudah lahir. Aku percaya masih banyak orang yang sangat percaya kepada kamu dan ingin kamu hidup lebih lama. Aku percaya walaupun kamu di berikan masalah atau cobaan hari ini, pasti kedepannya akan banyak hal baik yang menanti kamu. Aku juga percaya masih banyak cinta yang mengelilingi kamu. Tolong jaga kesehatan juga. Jadi tolong untuk hidup lebih lama ya, cantik? Semoga hidupmu lebih baik kedepannya dan semoga takdir bisa mempertemukan kita kembali.

And I’ve really enjoyed being with you too. More than I let on, maybe. And as for your words, sweetheart, you don’t know how healing they were. I didn’t think anyone could be proud of me the way you are. I didn’t think anyone would still look at me the way you do. Thank you, for choosing to love me again. So be well, ya. Laugh a lot. Write more. Eat on time. And when you remember me, I hope it’s with warmth. Aku sayang kamu.

As I first saw and spoke hello to you, you were just a mere stranger—nothing more, nothing less—perhaps a little more appealing compared to any other. But being with you was one heavenly journey I could ever experience, Isla, and every single thread of your attention is worth my time. In all honesty, I do regret enjoying my time with you as much as I did, as it passed so quickly, before a blink of an eye. I adore you, Isla, I truly do. I adore you to the skies and beyond, and I’d want to express my biggest gratitude for your companion and affection you have given to me, for planting such pure love and devotion into my reddish heart that beat for you. You are my moon and I am your sun, I wanted to see you several times a day, uttering my little I-like-you’s to only you as your affection hugged me so, and it felt nothing less than a lovely time of my days.

Forgive me for acting naive, my lovely Isla, for acting so needily. You have glued this heart of mine to your holding palms. I’d like to thank you for accepting my love although it’s childish, and adoring me even until tonight.

Here’s an admission (and a bit of a TMI, too?): regrettably, I have became one being full of hatred, at times. I’ve grown to dislike and criticize everything in my life that it turned dull and monochrome; but you came—you came as a love-artist, and you drew my days with colorful hues. With your little hearts scattered around and all over my days—I’ve never had a the heart to not like you. This felt innocent, in a way that is naive. It felt naive because we indulged in nothing but giggles and affection. and I, my Isla, is a little child in front of love.

I’m a child in front of love, and it didn’t matter so long as you’re there for me. That’s what you did, and I’ve grown to long for you just as how I loved my rainbows in the midst of the gloomy day, being put to rest after a heavy and thundering rain. And just as a the rainbow will fade away, so does this. So this, my Isla, this shall be my letter of love, for it will put a closing stamp to seal our love tale safe and sound as we leave it be.

So, uh. It turned out to be even longer than I intended it to... but I swear it’s unintentional! But then again, everything I felt, everything that you did to me, and everything we went through; they’re all unintentional. So, my Isla, here’s this: being loved by you was truly one of a memory. I will not try to put numbers as the visualization of how well you treated me dearly, Isla. You were so amazing to be around with and you’re nothing but a sunshine full of love! You’re as warm as a freshly baked bread, and your voice was as melodies that seperated me away from my woes. Thank you for loving me once again, though I was nothing more than a mere child in front of love.

I adore you, Islaa, in every hidden corner and open light of you, your patience that steadies me, your sweetness that startles me, the gentle turns of your mind that meet me always in kindness. Or the little shapes your behavior takes when you speak. You poured yourself out, whole and immediate, whenever you were asked for anything, and then some. Call it perfect if you like (it’s not flattery, it’s ledgered fact). And Islaa, I love how you make conversation breathe. Your little asides, the tiny mischiefs of your words, how they spill laughter from me before I know it. I love that, love how you draw lightness out of me. YOUR WRITING. Ah, your writing! I can never resist speaking of it. There’s sincerity inside it, thick as honey, and impossible to mistake. The diction, the taste of words you choose, so deliberate yet never stiff. I must tell you again, because it stirs me AGAIN, people who live for words will clamor to be near you once they see what you can do. And still I laugh at myself. No?? I am not jealous (mad face).

You make the other person comfortable, you see them, you check the small things, even asking whether I liked the film we watched... such a simple question, yet it told me everything. It showed me the measure of your care. So, thank you, Islaa, thank you for giving me your hours, your patience, your steady understanding of whatever storm I’ve been caught in. Thank you for sitting beside me, working with me, watching with me, making the ordinary soft. And how it amuses me still that Tita, in her way, mirrors your cuteness, your playfulness, the echo of you! And there’s more, always more, too much to unroll at once. Part of me wants to hoard it, to keep it private, hidden like a secret shrine, not to display the treasures of how you’ve treated me. Why must the world know? Why not keep it between us, guarded, precious? Still, I can’t resist letting slip the truth. You are sweet beyond sweet, and something in you, I don’t know what name to give it, keeps me spellbound, keeps me from looking away.

And I know lately I’ve been all rough edges, distracted, tired, with work pulling me away, and yet you handled me so well. You stay patient, you stay kind, you keep offering yourself without asking for return. Islaa, I thank you again for that patience, for that gentleness, for being so wholly yourself... If numbers could capture it, if love could be put on a scale, it would not stop rising 1000 out of 10 and still climbing.

It has been nothing but joy, Islaa, joy clean and simple, to be around you, to share even scraps of time with you. Thank you for trusting me, for choosing me, for letting me stand in your company ya? I wish you only warmth, only comfort, only the gentlest hands of life holding you steady. May every challenge be softened by grace. May the universe bend itself to your deserving. You, Islaa, are the star I look for. See you when I see you, my dearest, and even then, I will still be writing you, always writing you, until the words themselves wear out.

These days with you… I’ve never stretched time so shamelessly in my life. Every “I have to go soon” was a lie I told the clock because leaving you felt physically impossible, two days turned into four, into five, into “please, just one more hour,” because being near you is the most peaceful addiction I’ve ever known. ;) When I tell you you’re breathtaking, when I say your mind is dazzling, when I call you my dream in human form, none of it is flattery. I don’t have a single pretty lie in me for you, every word is just the plain truth spilling out because keeping it inside hurts. You are that lovely, Isla, you are that rare. I’m only ever describing what my eyes and my heart refuse to shut up about. You treated me so gently, so sweetly, like I’m something worth treasuring, and I still don’t know what I did to deserve that kind of care from someone as radiant as you. I’ve listened to that playlist, I mean, those are mine’s, tapi dedicated buat Kak Isla, kan? At least fifty times already, always hunting for the parts that feel they were written about the way your laugh tilts or how your eyes soften when you’re sleepy, I fall asleep to it, I wake up to it, I think of you in every song.

Thank you for letting me love you out loud, Kak Isla, since this was my debut into profound love, the feeling reverberated through every part of me. Thank you for being the most beautiful chapter I’ve ever lived, and thank you for being so perfectly, impossibly you, cute and brilliant and kind in ways that make me believe in miracles again. I’ll miss you every second, Kak Isla. As your client, I must convey that I am profoundly, utterly, and delightfully satisfied, any individual fortunate enough to share space with you, be it as a confidant, or even, dare I say, a deeply beloved intimate, would truly be blessed beyond measure.

You, Isla, possess and carry the very heart of a lover, in the most tender, sincere, and beautifully human sense. I perceive this truth; it is as clear as the morning light, and I MUST. Must I apologize for the times I regrettably slipped away or fell silent… in your boundless grace, somehow manage to make room for us, especially during these recent moments. For that enduring faith and openness, I offer my most heartfelt and lasting gratitude and thanks. And so, with these lingering feelings, farewell for now, hehehe… I hold the sincere hope that our paths will entwine and converge again someday, once we have both bloomed and grown into even finer, more realized versions of ourselves. May every step you take within the halls of college be guided by infused pure joy, and blessed by a generous sprinkle of cosmic favor.

Go, intern! Miss independent! I genuinely cherish and deeply love those precious moments when you share glimpses of your day, I have long since lost count of how many times I have offered you my thanks, and yet, it NEVER TRULY FEELS SUFFICIENT, not even REMOTELY CLOSE.

Ini juga, every single thing you gave me, the little treasures your own hands shaped, I’m carrying them all pressed right against the deepest part of my heart. Can we sit this one out, the messages? ;) Also, anyway, you poured sooooo much care into them, and I swear I can feel the gentleness of your fingers every time I touch anything you made for me. May God keep blessing those beautiful hands of yours, Kak Isla, they create magic without even trying.

And as always, you always know how to touch my heart in all the softest ways. I really can't thank you enough, Didi. To be honest, I reached out to you in my lowest moment, and you embraced me with the warmest hug I've ever felt. Please don't think that the love you gave me was not enough—it was more than I could ever dared to ask for. Actually... I feel a little bit sad too because I feel like I couldn't give you more. There's a lot of things I wanted to give you, but due to my circumstances... I feel like, I'm not showing you the best in me. Yet. I'll make it up next time, ya?

Also, thank you for reminding me once again, Didi. I'm actually tearing up reading that! Jadi malu... Let me keep your words close, ya? As a reminder everytime I feel blue. A reminder that someone will always accept me the way I am, like you, my pretty Didi.

I'm also very thankful for our encounter. It's such a short time, but I really hope it's not our last. Let's meet again some time soon, ya? Let's finish our rewatch list and do some grocies together, next time! :3

Thank you so much for everything, Didi. You will always have a special place in my heart. 💙

First of all, Kakak! My soulbound. I want to bid my utmost gratitude for being here with me and spending your time with me. Being by your side means the clock ticks too fast without you even realizing it is already over. It goes beyond what is comfortable. Being with you means being cherished and being ready to be wrapped in your sweet words. You always know what to say. You are such a sweet talker. You know how to say things so poetically and beautifully, just like the epitome of your presence. You know that you are so admirable in my eyes, right? I really admire you. I mean, you have all the sides, including the hot one. Sorry for being down bad. ;) Thank you for all the things you have shown me, Kakak. I never knew it would be like this, the kind of love that arrived gently and knocked softly, and accidentally it was all over the place and made me the happiest. You always take attention to what I say, and we are just a match made in heaven at this point. So I do hope we cross paths again sometime soon. Until then, I hope happiness always finds its way to you. Since, like you said, happiness does taste like me, I pray happiness is already tied to your beautiful name. Do not skip your pilates, please. Eat well, and good luck with babysitting. Je t’aime beaucoup, ma chérie. <3 Xx.

From the start, our interaction felt veryyy natural and comfortable. There was a strong sense of effort in how my Kakak communicate. Very warm, attentive, and caring. What I loved the most is how detailed and thoughtful Kakak Isla is. Kakak don’t just reply casually, but actually put effort into making a caring and meaningful conversations with me! Whether it’s sweet messages, daily check-ins, or even anyy silly talks that we have.

Oh, and i'd like to appreciate Kakak Isla's talent in WRITING.... Kakak's writings are beautifully written and feel very very heartwarming. I personally feels very loved by it caused by Kakak's sincere and endearing choice of words.

Overall, I would give Kakak Isla a very veeery high rating. I enjoyed everything from our short time together, from the emotional connection to the quality of interaction. Thank you so much Kakak Islaaaa, may your journey ahead only be filled with love and compassion. See you! ❤️

I also want to say I’m sorry if I’ve made any mistakes, in words or in actions. Whatever it may be, I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me.

So, then, let me start with how comfortable I feel when I'm with you. Just like before, this time too I'm very happy being near you. We've built something warm in the spaces between our conversations, a chemistry that grew quietly like climbing vines that were never planned but suddenly covered the whole wall so beautifully. My days feel different because you're there beside me, Isla, and all my exhaustion gets replaced with sweet “What should I tell Isla, ya?” “What is Isla doing right now?” questions. Everything starts revolving around you and I didn't even notice when it began. And there's nothing more lovely than waiting for your reply because that's exactly what comfort feels like with you. And, meeting you again after all this time, makes me feel even more at ease with you. I'm glad because you're becoming braver with me. (: I always love it when you tell me about your days, or the things happening in your life because you're so expressive that I feel like I'm really watching it all unfold up close like sitting in the best seat of a show that's only for me.

Isla, you're a good person. Very good. If goodness could take human form, it might look like you. Beautiful, enchanting and full of warmth that never runs dry even after being given so many times over. There's nothing more I want to say except how grateful I am for your existence. And thank you for never tiring of being good, thank you for always doing everything with your whole heart, the beautiful affirmations you give at just the right moments and gifts I never asked for yet always arrive like morning dew that never forgets to come even when no one invites it. Thank you for all your effort that's never half-hearted ya. I also always love reading your beautiful words, even I often read them again when I need something convincing because your writing really makes me feel what it's like to be loved. Loved peacefully, loved passionately, loved beautifully. It all arrives in different ways and everything feels real. Even without you saying a single word, I always feel loved by you as deeply as possible.

For this last part, you've worked so hard, Isla. You've never disappointed me, but more happiness you've left behind than anything else. You always make me love you with everything you do without you having to try harder than simply being yourself. Thank you so much for that. And I hope we can meet again in whatever season comes next.