https://padlet.com/29ekeane/b1ziz53nnswgbg9e Here, you can give me specific and valuable feedback on all of my writing pieces throughout the year! As you comment, please remember to be kind with your words. However, as you offer "Two Stars and a Wish," constructive criticism is certainly welcome! en-us 2022-10-21 13:56:43 UTC 2023-03-28 01:14:27 UTC hello@padlet.com https://padlet.net/icons/png/1f941.png https://padlet.com/29ekeane/b1ziz53nnswgbg9e/wish/2353850415 1st star: I liked how you included every single detail of what was happening at that moment, like when you said “the leaves of the great tree rustling above me” which had barely anything to do with the story, which is nice. Another thing I liked (2nd star) was that you told the reader exactly how you felt in that very moment, like when you implied that you were feeling really scared and you were sweating like crazy. One thing that I wish you would improve is the grammar. That is literally all that I found wrong with this memoir.]]> 2022-10-24 15:38:21 UTC https://padlet.com/29ekeane/b1ziz53nnswgbg9e/wish/2353850415 https://padlet.com/29ekeane/b1ziz53nnswgbg9e/wish/2355882708 A strength of your memoir, “Flipped Mind”is your figurative language. You put in a lot and you put a lot of hard work into your figurative language. Also, you had great word choice in your figurative language. My favorite figurative language that you had was “The trampoline grabbed my leg and shot me down” Another thing I think you did well on is your inner thoughts. I really liked how you were actually talking to yourself. You also tried to keep them short, but not too short. My favorite inner thought was “I’m gonna die… just keep on turning. One thing I think you still need to work on is your figurative language. You did well on it, but maybe you could have elaborated on some of them. But overall, outstanding job!]]> 2022-10-25 17:29:41 UTC https://padlet.com/29ekeane/b1ziz53nnswgbg9e/wish/2355882708 https://padlet.com/29ekeane/b1ziz53nnswgbg9e/wish/2489970898 The figurative language was good. It was one of the best parts.  The intro was really good and I liked how it was described.  The ending was good but could have been better. It was still good.

]]> 2023-02-21 16:36:07 UTC https://padlet.com/29ekeane/b1ziz53nnswgbg9e/wish/2489970898 https://padlet.com/29ekeane/b1ziz53nnswgbg9e/wish/2524022858 Hi Evan! A strength of your analysis paragraph, “The Importance of Piper” is your transitions. There were a lot, and they were perfectly fit into the paragraph. They fit like a glove! Overall, I liked “truly” and “furthermore.”  Also, another strength is how you explained how the evidence is important in life. I really saw how this matters in real life, and it never came to me like that before. I especially liked in the first explanation when you said, “Piper shows this first hand by just trying to run away from the water leading them to becoming terrified of it and hiding from the ocean.” I enjoyed how you worded that. Keep up the great work! Although this was a stellar piece, something you could have improved on was the overall punctuation and grammar. There were a couple of places where you could’ve added some commas or periods to split up a run on sentence. But in the end, I think you did a great job!]]> 2023-03-20 17:43:27 UTC https://padlet.com/29ekeane/b1ziz53nnswgbg9e/wish/2524022858 29jsalamanca https://padlet.com/29ekeane/b1ziz53nnswgbg9e/wish/2533513803 Great job on your paragraph! Something you did great was using your transitions. I especially liked “to further elaborate,” and “one can apply this lesson to life.” Great job! Another strength of your paragraph is your claim sentence. This single sentence has great word choice, including “displays” and “powerful.” Although this piece was great, you might have been able to use better word choice in your explanations. For example, you used some basic words like “hard time” instead of something like “difficult time.” But great job on your piece!]]> 2023-03-27 17:47:47 UTC https://padlet.com/29ekeane/b1ziz53nnswgbg9e/wish/2533513803 29cmccall https://padlet.com/29ekeane/b1ziz53nnswgbg9e/wish/2534135308 Hi Evan! One star in your essay is your incredible loadout of transitions, you had 10 which was exceeding the expectation of 5. Your transition, “To further elaborate” was fantastic. In addition, you restated the title numerous times and you wrote it 4 times in your story. This helps keep readers engaged in your essay. One wish I have for you is possibly finding more related word choice. For example in your first evidence you said basically and as a reader it felt like you were annoyed. Also in your sum it up you said clearly which felt like you were tired of explaining.]]> 2023-03-28 01:14:00 UTC https://padlet.com/29ekeane/b1ziz53nnswgbg9e/wish/2534135308