In the July 22’s schedule, I was scheduled to be the first one and was given 15 minutes for the interview. I decided to enter the link a few minutes early since I saw Ms. Madaje and Ms. Digol was already on the call. During the interview, I believe that I was doing pretty okay when I started but my composure and concentration was shaken when Mr. Evangelista and Ms. Aguilar entered the meet. I mean, I don’t really blame them but I was just startled. It was also my fault not regaining that composure and a small panic attack occurred that led to shortness of breath and stuttering. Then, after the actual interview and when the feedback was being given, my heart rate normalized as I tried to calm down and my breathing eventually normalized as well so I can say that all is good. (Thank God I didn’t pass out, it would be a lot more embarrassing. Haha)

Even with all of that, I must say that the Final Mock Job Interview was indeed a memorable and a fun learning experience. The most significant realization I had during and after the interview was to believe and be more confident in myself and my work. One of the comments of the interviewer for me to improve was: “show that you're confident about your work”. Even though I try to not think about it, most of my life and even now, I have this anxiety that myself and my “creativity” will never be enough: that I am just a random wannabe artist in this world. But this interview helped me to realize more that how can other people believe in me and my works if I, myself, don’t fully have the confidence in myself and my art? And that opened my eyes to have more faith in my art and visions.

In addition, some of the comments were more of me being very conscious with my grammar, organizing & expressing my thoughts, nervousness, and other technicalities when it comes to being in an actual interview. And yes, I 100% agree to all of the comments given by both the interviewer and the instructor since I do acknowledge that I did underperform during the Final Mock Job Interview compared to the Initial and I will definitely keep in mind the comments and improve on them in the process: hopefully, doing a better job in my actual job interview when I have one in the future. I am grateful for all the feedback I received from them because I believe that it will help me improve and be better.

Furthermore, I actually discussed the results with my mom if she’s disappointed and she said that: “I know you have difficulties in explaining yourself and communicating but you just really have to practice and be more confident about yourself”, and it was actually like the feedback that I got. With the suggestions and experience I had, if given a chance, I will tell my past self for the interview to practice to relax and to be confident with ourselves and our artworks. I would also like to tell myself that everything will be okay as long as we work on ourselves more but also acknowledging that we are enough in our own little way. I will tell myself that we are artists and that we should believe in our art.  With this, I wouldn’t be so afraid of failing and drown myself in those negative thoughts lingering inside my head and focus on the brighter future ahead of me. That way, I wouldn't have to worry about making the same mistakes and shortcomings I did in the Final Mock Job Interview and I believe that I can really be and do better.